-93-
From that day on, every evening after the dinner, Remus and I have been teaching the students Defence Against the Dark Arts in secret in the Room of Requirement. Well, mostly Remus has been teaching. I've been there to help whenever needed as dueling partner. All of this is quite a lot on top of the regular days of work, plus helping the elves around the kitchen time to time, so I've been feeling really tired end of every day. But we need to teach the kids how to defend themselves - if and when the time comes. With the help of Neville, Luna, Cho, Cedric and Vivian we have managed to include a few other students from each year to come and learn with us. Unfortunately, we can't include every single student into this 'club'.
We haveto be very careful who we tell this about, since there are some students who would be quick to run to the Headmaster and tell him everything what we have been up to. And we don't want that. What comes to Headmaster... I've been avoiding him. Quite a lot, actually. Not that he would be wandering around the castle as often as he used to as Potions Master. Remus words has been replaying in my head. What if... What if he really did it against his own will? Not saying he would have been under any curse, but driven by fear, for example? 'I was... Following orders.' Snape's words echoes in my head. Whose orders? Voldemort's? Or... Dumbledore's? No, that's impossible. (Y/N), you are being ridiculous right now. Urgh! I don't know what to believe anymore!
As the days turns into weeks, slowly but surely, the whole Wizarding World gets covered in pure white snow. It's pretty grey day when I come to the garden after the classes are over to place yet another candle to Sniffy's grave. It is now been three months since he died, and I've always made sure to keep the candle alive for him 'to be able to see in the dark' - so to speak. Oh, how much he would have loved to run around and dive in to this snow... Right away, when I arrive there, I see there is a new candle that has been already lit. "Hm?" some steam comes out of my nose as both of my eyebrows raise out of slight surprise. By the looks of it, seems that someone had put it on only couple hours ago. But who..? Not many people know about this place, so I'm a little bit taken aback. A wistful smile appears on my face regardless while watching the candle next to Sniffy's grave. Thank you, whoever you are.
After spending enough time at the grave, I start heading back in the castle. When I get to the front yard, familiar voice calls:"Oh, Professor (Y/L)!". "Hm?" I turn to see him - Horace Slughorn, who's now walking towards me. I'm not entirely sure how, but he got hired to teach the Potions by the Ministry when it became official Snape was going to be the new Headmaster of Hogwarts. All I know he also didn't have much of a choice, but to come here. Like I said it before, they really has us in a choke hold, one way or another. We haven't had too many interactions over these past months, but anytime we happen to run into each other, we always exchange couple pleasant words. When I asked if he remembers me back when I was a student, he told me he indeed remembers me. 'You were so clever girl the first three years, but something happened to your grades towards the end...' Had no desire start telling him the real reason for my grades went drastically down, so I just laughed and blame it on 'just being naive, young teenager'.
Giving the old man polite smile:"Good afternoon, Professor.". He comes stand beside me and we start talking as we are looking at the students around the yard, who are all just hanging around in their long, winter cloaks with their Houses scarfs around their necks. They all look pretty down. And no wonder... The semester isn't even in its half way, and people are already feeling drained. "Things really are not like they used to be." Slughorn suddenly starts. I take a quick glance at him before looking back at the students. "I remember when children used to run around and explore the castle like it was their first day - no matter what age they were." some steam comes out of his mouth as he sighs. "Mmm..." I nod as agreement.
It's true. The kids have really became afraid to run around the castle and have fun because they are too afraid of getting caught of 'doing something what they are not supposed to' from the slightest thing and get detention for it. Wish there was something I could do to make a smile appear on their faces. Then the idea hits me and my eyes starts to sparkle. Slughorn raise both of his eyebrows when I hunch down beside him. "What in the Merlin's beard are you doing, my dear?" he wonders while watching down on me. I make a ball out of snow and start rolling it:"Thought I'd make a fort. Join me if you want, Professor.". With that, I start rolling the snow around the yard, making it bigger by every roll. Slughorn just stares after me from where he stands confused. Slowly, all the children around the yard notices what am I doing and start approaching me, looking all so curious what am I doing.
Soon enough, one by one, they all joined me and we build one and half meters high fort and two snowmen each side of it. Without any of our knowledge, somewhere high up inside the castle, Headmaster walks in a hallway and notices this happened thru one of the big windows. He stops to stare down to see what's going on. Whole this time we all keep laughing and having cheerful spirit all around. Slughorn has been standing little bit further away and watch all this happening small smile on his face. I turn to the Professor with wide smile on my face:"C'mon, Horace! Join us!". Right then, I feel something hit me on my back. "Huh?" confused, I turn around only to see how the students are baffled as well. One of the snowmen has 'come to alive' by magic and actually had thrown a snowball at me. I take a quick glance at Slughorn who gives me the 'wasn't me' - look. "Then who..-?" is all I get to say when it starts throwing more snowballs at me and the others. "Get in the cover!!!" one of the students yell with joy and they all start giggling and laughing as they start running around the yard.
Eventually, we are all running around, hiding and throwing snowballs at each other. The smiles on their faces... The joy that this little activity brought to them... The laughter that fills the yard... Is exactly what we all needed. When the snowman once again is about to throw a ball at me, I quickly draw my wand and use it to catch the ball in mid air and throw it right back at the snowman. The snowball breaks right away when it gets in contact with the snowman. "Woah! How did you do that?!" one of the first year Gryffindor asks eyes sparkling and I start teaching some of the students how to throw items by using their wands and how to use Protego to shield them whenever a snowball comes right at them. Everyone is eager to participate, even the ones who already knows how to use those spells. Slughorn looks around time to time, little bit nervous how I'm teaching the students without permission.
Later that same day, after the students left the Room of Requirement, Remus and I stayed there for a moment longer to tidy up the room for the next day's lesson as always. "Well, that went well. I think the students are ready to learn the a..." I turn to my friend, who's standing in front of a mirror, looking so pensive. There is a black and white picture placed in right upper corner of the mirror of his wife and his son, smiling. Remus... It pains my heart seeing him like this. He must miss them so bad. To think he got no way to get in touch with them while he's here. If any of us even tires to send out an owl, someone of the Death Eaters is going to snatch it in mid air and read it regardless. So there is no point trying to send any letters to anyone. They all will end up in a trash or get destroyed.
Christmas isn't that far away from either, and none of us are allowed to leave Hogwarts like normally we do. The quilt keeps washing over me time to time how I'm the reason why he's here and not with his family. Where he belongs. Then again... Tonks and Ted are safe and are getting enough money to live somewhat comfortable life financially. And that's most important. I walk beside my friend and look up the picture:"I miss them too.". Without taking his eyes off the picture, he sighs:"There is no doubt, I would do anything for them, but I must admit... This is taking the toll on me. Being away from them, I mean.". My heart feels the sting and I turn to him:"I'm so sorry, Remus. I shouldn't have..-", "No, no, (Y/N). Please don't take this on yourself. I'm not mad at you. Trust me." Remus is quick to place his hand onto my shoulder with sincere look in his eyes. My breath shudders as I try to settle down the heart and raising tears:"...Still. I'm sorry. About everything.". Encouraging smile comes up to his lips:"C'mon. Let's get out of here.".
When we get out of there, we notice how late it really is. It's dark outside, and the only light in here is coming from the torches. It's way past the curfew. Not that it matter for us Professors, but still... It's kinda creepy here and I don't like it. The thought of wandering back all the way down to the chamber gives me the chills. Good thing I got Remus with me to walk down at least half of the way. Just when Remus and I are about to walk away from the door that leads to the Room of Requirement, we both freeze when we hear people's voices in the distance. Huh? It's the Headmaster himself, Alecto and Filch! What are they doing in here? And this hour too... Right away, Remus and I share this look, both knowing whatever we do, we haveto stay quiet.
They are only couple corners away from us. "I'm telling you, there is something fishy going on this floor. Students keeps coming up here and vanishing for couple hours." Filch explains to them. They are on to us?! Headmaster's deep voice hums around the floors walls as he speaks. His voice is so deep and quiet, it's hard to hear what his exact words are. Remus and I are just standing there, waiting for them to leave so we can quickly rush back to our own chambers. My heart is beating fast! Remus is giving me the 'don't you dare make a sound' – glare. Calm down. They're soon going to be gone. Nothing to worry about. Just then, a cat walks behind the corner. And not just any cat. It's Mrs. Norris! Remus and I tensed up when we see her. Shit!!!
Right away, the cat starts making sounds to inform her owner she found us. "Oh, no, no, no, no..! Please don't..-" I whisper and wave my hands - like that's going to help. "Huh?" we can hear Filch's voice and how all three of them starts approaching with fast steps. No! Panic hits. I turn to my friend and start to whisper:"What are we going to do?!". "Just... Keep calm. It's going to be alright." he whispers back. HOW?! My eyes flickers between his:"Wh..? Remus.". The anxiety raises in me and the door to the Room of Requirement slowly appears again. Remus notices this and snaps his head back to me with a frown:"(Y/N). Stop thinking. You're going to expose us..!". Discomfort grows inside me and I panic more:"I..- I can't help it!".
The door becomes more clear and visible now. Knowing we can't just run in and hide in the room, I'm way too stressed out to make the door to disappear for them to see once we would get inside. What are we going to do?! They are coming closer by every second! There is no place to run or hide either. We are trapped. What are we going to tell them when they'll see us?! Better yet, when they'll see the door right next to us! We can already see their shadows, rushing behind that corner. This is way too intense! I think I'm going to faint. "(Y/N)." Remus let's out under his breath quietly. Huh?! My head snaps up to him with worry written all over my face. Right then, Remus grabs both sides of my arms and slams my back up against the wall nearby, and before I could react, he crashes his lips against mine.