Safe & Sound

James left yesterday and Sirius has never felt this alone. It’s also a full moon so the thoughts about Remus are also not helping. He knows Remus told him strictly not to worry about him but he can’t help it. He feels like he doesn’t have any control now that he is not with Remus during the full moon. They’ve gone through them for years now. It feels so strange not knowing how he is doing. 

Remus doesn’t tell much about his time with the werewolves. Dumbledore had told him not to because no one can risk any information falling into the wrong hands. As if Sirius is the so-called ‘wrong hands’. He would rather die than betray his friends. But again, these are hard times and you can’t know who to trust. It eats at Sirius, knowing that there are people who would do something like that, knowing what the people are like on the other side of the war. 

How could anyone want to stand for their beliefs? 

The static of his radio pulls him out of his thoughts. “There had been an attack on a town in The Netherlands, muggles, witches and wizards have died in this attack, about one thousand three hundred people. It is clear that You-know-who wants to spread the war. As you know, The United States has been at war for a few weeks, there haven’t been alot of major attacks but still, war has been hard overseas. Back to The United Kingdom, many witches and wizards have gone missing since yesterday. There have been three death-reports. These are; Gideon and Fabian Prewett and James Potter.” 

Sirius feels his heart stop as he hears the name James swore he’d never hear. A chill ran over his back as he was overwhelmed with many emotions. He feels angry, mostly. Angry with Dumbledore for sending him on that mission. Angry with himself for letting James go on that mission. All he felt was anger. He feels his breathing become irregular as he paces through the living room. The living room that was furnished by James , that was lived in by James. 

The sound of James’ laughter ricochets through Sirius’ mind as if he is there with him. He feels James’ warmth against him, comforting him. And for a moment, it seems as if he’s actually there with him.

But he’s not.

He’s-

No.

He can’t be.

Sirius drops down to the ground, hugging his knees as tears are streaming down his cheeks. He rocks back and forth as he tries to convince himself that James is fine.

He has to be.

He doesn’t notice his front door opening and aurors barging into his home. James’ home.

“No, no, please, I didn’t do it!” Sirius sobs as he’s being pulled to his feet and dragged along. 

“You are arrested for the murder of James Potter.” 

☾☆☾☆

“You’ll set up the tent here and I will put up some protective enchantments around us.” Regulus orders James as he points to his bag. James looks confused at the bag, “how is there a tent in that bag?” He wonders. “Extension charm.” Regulus replies flatly. 

“Protego totalum,” 

He rummages through the bag, knocking a few book stacks over. Of Course Regulus has books in his bag. After he can’t find the tent for a while, he remembers that he has a wand. He tends to forget his wand a lot. Like when his mother needs his help with some magic and he leaves it on the couch. “Accio tent,” he mumbles just before the tent comes shooting out of the bag. 

“Salvio hexia,” he hears from behind him as he sets the tent up with magic. 

Regulus is still putting up spells in a circle around the tent as James finishes it up. He lights every light in the tent to brighten it up and Regulus enters the tent. “Nice place you’ve got here.” James tries to start a conversation but Regulus just grabs his bag and heads for his ‘room’. It’s more of a tiny space separated  with a curtain from the main area of the tent. James sits down on a bench in defeat, sighing. 

“Did you knock over my books?” Regulus asks, anger lacing his voice. James winces as he looks apologetic at the younger boy. “Yeah, sorry, there were a lot of books,” he apologises. “Don’t make it happen again.” He says, pointedly. 

“Hey, where is the Regulus that was actually happy to see me in the cave?” James asks. “He was never there, I am never happy.” Regulus dead-pans. “Oh har har. Very funny. Don’t be so broody and tell me what in Merlin’s name we are doing here.” 

“I’m searching for objects. Objects that possess a part of Voldemort’s soul to destroy them and make him mortal once again.” Regulus explains as he sits down opposite of James. “What?” It looks like James’ brain is shutting down as he tries to process all of the information he just received. 

“Please elaborate.”

“There are objects, called Horcruxes. They are made to split a soul and make that person immortal. Voldemort had the amazing idea to split his soul five times and he’s planning another one.” Regulus explains. James still looks like he doesn’t understand one word of what just came out of Regulus’ mouth so he continues. “I have two horcruxes already, the locket and a ring. Now we need to destroy them so he’ll be mortal once more.” 

“And do you know how to destroy them?” Now it’s Regulus’ turn to wince. “No, I don’t. I haven’t gotten to that part yet.” He slumps in his seat. “Let’s do some research then.” James perks up as he understands the situation. “There was a book in my parents library that has the answer, I read it a long time ago. But when I went back to search for it, it was gone. I looked everywhere for it but it seems like the book never existed.” Regulus frowns. 

“Do you have anyone you know that could help you with this?” 

“Yes, but I made a promise that I would never go to her again because it puts her in danger. I take her memories every time but she’s psychic so she always sees me coming.” Regulus proposes. “Then we’ll go see her, she’ll be prepared.” James smiles at him, trying to convince him. After a while, Regulus gave in and they went to see Pandora.

☆☀︎︎☆☀︎︎

Just before James could knock on the door, it opened and revealed the bright face of Pandora Rosier. “I knew you were coming.” She smiled dreamily. “I chased Xenophilius out of the house just in case you two were coming.” She told them as she invited them inside. “Bless you,” James chuckles. “Come, sit down, I’ll grab you your tea.” 

“I didn’t know that she was psychic but it really fits her if you know what I mean.” James starts a conversation with Regulus after they take off their coats and they’re settled on the couch. “Yeah, it started in our third year. She has visions. They change sometimes. And she can obviously change the outcome of a vision.” 

“Has she ever changed the outcome of one?” James asks curiously. “Yes, I prevented a poor girl from getting her heart broken because she wanted to ask Regulus out. I convinced him to go to the common room just in time.” Pandora’s voice fills the room as she holds two cups of tea. They thank her as they get handed the tea. How does she know I drink green tea cranberry? James wonders.

Regulus is silently sipping on his Earl Grey tea as Pandora fills him up on her life. “Oh! Xenophilius proposed to me last week!” She exclaimed excitedly. “Bless you, have you got allergies or something?” James asks.

“She’s not sneezing, James. Xenophilius is the name of her fiance.” Regulus frowns at him. James’ eyes widen as he looks apologetic at Pandora. She only flashes a sweet smile his way as she always does. 

“So, Regulus, what can I help you with?” Pandora starts. “We're looking for a way to destroy horcruxes, do you know what they are?” Regulus informs her. “I have heard of them, yes. I don't know how to destroy them but I do know where to look.” She says before jumping up from her seat to walk to her mini-library. 

She was lucky that she met someone who loves reading as much as she does. Pandora is truly happy with Xenophilius. They fit so well, they really are the definition of soulmates. 

She comes back with a small black book. It's the book Regulus read at Grimmauld Place. He feels himself sigh in relief, now knowing that it wasn’t all in his imagination. “Where did you get this book? I searched for it for so long but I never found it. It’s like it never existed.” 

“Voldemort made sure to find as many copies of this to destroy but I saw him coming so I hid it. He knew that that book would be a step to being immortal again so he wanted it gone.” Pandora calmly answers. 

“How do you both call him by his name this comfortably? I don't even want to think about it.” James shivers. Pandora chuckles opposite of him. “The fear of the name only increases the fear of the thing itself.” She smiles at James. “Basically, it's bullshit that he makes himself look like some big scary man when he is just a normal middle aged man without a nose.” 

“You know what he looks like?” James asks, abruptly turning towards Regulus. “Yes, you do know I was forced to be a Deatheater for a while, right?” Regulus rolls his eyes at him. “Wait, really?” He asks, eyes wide. Regulus rolls his eyes again and slightly rolls up his sleeve to reveal black ink painting his skin. James deflates at the sight that made everyone’s suspections real. “It was never real and I got out of there as soon as I had a plan, believe me.” Regulus assures him, seeing the look on his face. 

Everyone around him knew that Regulus would end up with the deatheaters, even Sirius. James never did. He may not have known him well, but he knew that Regulus would never. He feels a little let down. Even if Regulus was never really with them, his skin is still marked with his mark. He can’t even begin to fathom how Regulus must feel. He has to live with that ink on his skin, trying to convince himself that he wasn’t part of the deatheaters. 

James was so deep in thought that he didn’t hear that Regulus and Pandora had started talking again. Regulus has the book in his hands, looking relieved that he even has the book. He had asked her about Evan and Barty, Pandora was happily telling him about them. Regulus and Pandora quickly wrap the conversation up after they all finished their tea. Regulus takes out his wand and prepares Pandora that he’ll take her memories from the afternoon they spent together. He told her that he still has the previous memories and will preserve this one with just as much care. She just nods at him and smiles, as she trusts him with her life.

Regulus cautiously puts the memory in a flask and places it with the rest of them. They’re about to walk out of the door but stop when they hear the radio.  

“There have been three death-reports. These are; Gideon and Fabian Prewett and James Potter.”

James looks like he’s seen a ghost. James feels like he’s seen a ghost. He is the ghost. “Fuck,” Is the only thing that Regulus can say in the moment. James’ brain is working the fastest it ever has. Sirius. 

I promised him. 

Tears spring into James’ eyes as he can imagine what Sirius must be feeling right now. “I promised Sirius I would be fine, I promised him I’d be back!” James gasped frantically. “You can send him a patronus but we need to get out of here.” Regulus assures him, taking the other man’s hand in his and apparating them away. 

☀︎︎☾☀︎︎☾

“Ugh I can not wait to take a shower, those caves stink!” Remus smiles at Evelyn and she nods along with him as she brushes her braids out of her face. They walk up the stairs to the apartment, Remus is almost shaking with anticipation as he can’t wait to see Sirius again. His Sirius. When they reach the apartment, Remus frowns at the already open door. They walk through it, trying to find any signs of Sirius, James or Peter. 

Their dinner table is laying on its side, a few glasses broken on the floor next to it. Remus checks every room, frantically looking for something, anything. When it is clear to Remus that something is wrong, he darts to the phone. He picks it up and frantically dials every number he knows after one another. Why is no one picking up?! 

The last one.

Mary. 

“Please, pick up Mary. Please!” Remus stresses. Evelyn is tensed up next to him, not daring to say anything. When the sound of Mary’s voice fills his ears, he sighs in relief. “Mary? Where is everyone?” 

“Remus, something awful has happened.” He heard from the other side of the line.

Remus feels his knees go weak and he drops to the floor. Evelyn follows him and catches him slightly. 

“No, no, no” Remus repeats madly as he leans into Evelyn as tears spring into his eyes, blurring his vision. He hears Mary’s voice absently from the phone, asking him if he’s okay. Evelyn picks up the phone and quickly introduces herself, then asks what happened. The phone is loud enough for Remus to hear everything. 

Why? 

Why Sirius?

Why is Sirius the one who had to stab them all in the back and betray them?

Why is James the first of them to die?

Why?