Chapter 9
~Draco~
I can't do this.
I have to...
This was a mistake...
All of this was a mistake. I should have never fallen in love with Y/n... She was at risk now... risk of being hurt. Tonight was the night the death eaters would come to Hogwarts. The night I have to kill Dumbledore. The night I have to leave Y/n.
It's been a week since we confessed our feelings towards each other, and the best week of my life. But the past few days I got anxious multiple times. I tried to hide it, but Y/n was suspicious. I told her I had a test at the end of the week and I think I convinced her... but knowing her she probably didn't want me to force myself to open up. She is sweet...I can open up to her easily...just not about this. I don't want to scare her... I don't want to lose her. I sent an owl to her an hour ago, to meet me at the Library. I told her I'd be late, but I would be a lot longer than I expected.
I was in the room of requirements, waiting for the Death Eaters to come through the vanishing cabinet. I took the covering off it and stepped back. The knob creaked and that was enough to make me run.
I exited the room of requirements and headed as quickly as I could to the Astronomy Tower, Snape told me that he would be there. I passed by the Library but knew I couldn't see Y/n now... I have to wait. As I made my way up the first few stairs of the Astronomy tower I heard Dumbledore's voice. His voice was soothing, and calming in a way.
I can't do this... I can't-
You have to. Everyone you love will die...
I shuddered and climbed up to the top of the tower, holding my wand as steady as I could. My hand still shook, shook too much for me to appear threatening. I walked far away from him, along the shape of the tower, pointing my wand at him.
I can't...
"Good evening, Draco," He greeted, despite my wand being pointed at him, "What brings you here, on this fine spring evening?"
I shuddered but tried to keep my voice from shaking, "Who else is here?" I snapped, "I heard you talking. I stepped a bit closer to him, but we were still so far apart.
Dumbledor's eyebrow twitched," I often talk aloud to myself, I find it extraordinarily useful..." He kept his calm eyes on me, not even glancing at my wand, "Have you been whispering to yourself? Draco?" He asked.
I wanted to lower my wand. I wanted to tell him I was sorry for everything I had done, and that I couldn't keep up with this. He out of all people would understand...but I couldn't. There was too much at risk. Too much was being put at stake.
Where are the Death Eaters...why aren't they here yet?
"Draco– You are no assassin." He said. I didn't respond for a second, I was thinking. The death eaters were roaming around the castle... they could have gone to the Library.
Shit– Y/n...
"How do you know what I am?!" I snapped, my fear showing in my voice, "I've done things that would shock you."
"Like cursing Katie Bell, hoping in return she'd bear a cursed necklace to me? Or by lacing a bottle of mead with poison?" He looked at me, his head tilted as if he was studying me, "Why didn't you use Y/n Granger?"
My eyes widened at the mention of her name, "How do you know about-"
"Draco," He cut me off, "I know more than you think, you have a soft spot for her." He said with a small smile. I was vulnerable now.
"Yes– I-I... Her and I-"
"Are in love." He said, "It's clear when two soulmates meet, that the past week has been one of your best."
I couldn't say anything, I was speechless. The way he knew about everything...
"Draco, she made you second guess your efforts. There's no denying it." He paused, "I know what you here for but-"
"No!" I cut him off, "He trusts me. I was chosen for this." I said frantically, and revealed the dark mark on my forearm, "There's no backing away from it now..."
"Then I shall make it easy for you-"
"Expelliarmus!" I quickly knocked his wand out of his hand, he didn't even flinch. He was too calm...
There was a loud door opening, the death eaters had arrived...
"We're not alone... There are others..." Dumbledore looked at me intently, "How?"
I hesitated, "The Vanishing Cabinet in the Room of Requirements. I've been mending it-"
"Let me guess... it has a sister, a twin..."
"Borgin and Burkes– they form a passage..."
He smiled a bit, "Ingenious." He said, stepping closer, I stepped backward and he stopped almost instantly, "Draco, Please let me help you..."
"I don't want your help!" I snapped, my voice shaking, my knuckles turning white from holding my wand too tightly, "Don't you understand?
"I have to do this." I said my voice quivering, "I have to kill you."
I paused, "He'll kill me, he'll kill her..."
He knew I was talking about Y/n. I was so scared for her safety... if she ever got hurt because of me... I could never live with that kind of guilt...
Before the death eaters came up the stairs he whispered to me, "Y/n...you love her so much you would do anything to keep her safe..."
I looked at him with my wand, pointed at a theme, and nodded quickly. If I didn't do this, You know who would surely enter my mind and attack her. Especially because she's a muggle born. I can't let that happen... Eventually, the death eaters set foot on the same platform as us.
Bellatrix was the first to speak. "Well," She looked like she was in awe, "look what we have here..."
She stopped over and whispered over my shoulder, "Well done Draco..." She pecked my cheek, making me shudder, and she moved away. She may be my aunt, but that doesn't mean I don't think she's crazy...
"Good evening Bellatrix, I believe introductions are in order," Dumbledore said, probably trying to stall for me.
"Love to Albus," She stood in the middle of the tower, "But I'm afraid we're on a tight schedule." She hissed.
I wanted to leave, leave, and change my whole identity. Go to Y/n and hug her tightly, saying that the past year was all a dream. But I couldn't. He would find me.
"Do it!" Bellatrix hissed once again, her voice sounded like parseltongue.
Another death eater responded as I did nothing, "He doesn't have the stomach, just like his father." He said, but he was right. I didn't want to do this at all...
"Go on Draco, now!" She yelled. I couldn't do anything. I couldn't say the words. I wasn't able to form any words, even if I tried to say it.
...
"No." Snape's voice rang, and I instantly lowered my wand and backed away. I watched as Snape walked to where I was standing, a bit closer, and pointed his wand at Dumbledore. Unlike mine, his hand was steady.
"Severus." Dumbledore said, in the most calm voice I had ever heard from someone who was about to die, "Please."
"...Avada Kedavra."
And with that, Dumbledore was dead. He had fallen off of the balcony... Snape quickly grabbed my shoulder and we escalated the stairs. I hurriedly made my way to the Library, and he didn't question it. When I got there I quickly opened the door and shut it behind me. There was a crash, and I saw Y/n's head pop up to see where the noise came from. A sigh of relief washed over me as I saw she had not been seen by anyone. I quickly rushed over to her and pulled her out of the chair she was in. She had been reading.
"Y/n, I'm so sorry," I said quickly, My hands moved to hers, and held them tightly not wanting to let go.
"Draco- what is wrong? What happened-"
I kissed her, stopping her from asking the question I didn't want to answer. For me, it was a desperate kiss, one filled with regret and sadness. I wanted to pull her away from all this and wrap her in my arms, but I couldn't. She was in danger. So much danger and it was all my fault.
So I kissed her harder, and she did so as well. I could tell she was worried, yet her lips reflected the same amount of desperation as mine.
I broke apart and tears started flooding out of my eyes, "You don't have to forgive me." Her hands came up to my face to wipe away the tears, and I kissed her again, "I love you so much."
There was another crash, "Draco what happened?" She asked again and I shook my head, looking into her eyes.
"Y/n I want you to stay in the library and don't come out, don't come out until someone comes to get you, do you understand?" She nodded but opened her mouth to protest, which I didn't let her, "Promise me." I said my voice was shaking.
"I- I promise but-"
"I'm sorry," I said, kissing her one last time before I finally let go of her hands and broke the kiss. I didn't look back at her after I ran out the doors of the Library to join the others. Bellatrix had practically blown up the great hall, and we made our way out to the forest.
Harry Potter followed us out here, I don't know how but he did. And Bellatrix set Hagrid's hut on fire. I jumped at the sight. I knew perfectly well that Y/n was watching this from the Library window. I couldn't think straight. I just followed the rest of the death eaters.
As long as Y/n was safe...
She will be safe, away from me.