Detention Discourse

“After we moved to Sunnydale, I figured I’d have a chance to start over.” Jack snorted, the corners of his lips quirking upwards. “That’s what my folks hoped.” He sat up and crossed his legs like a monk. “And, I did. I went from the prodigy and new kid on the block, to the annoying teacher’s pet, to the overprivileged dweeb who almost got kicked out of school and ruined Ozpin’s marriage.” To which he grabbed one of the bottles and took a long swig, then he handed it off to Mercury (the others didn’t blame him).

“Airing Salem and Mr. Lombardo’s affair to the entire student body might not have been the most ethical move,” Momo says. “But, they would have been found out eventually. All you did was speed things up.”

“Yeah,” Gary agreed. “The saying “cheaters never prosper” exists for a reason.”

Aria’s eye twitched.

“Gary does have a point.” Luna chimed in. “Superintendent Ozpin would have found out about them eventually. Just be glad that it happened now and not later on.”

“At least, he got a crap ton of alimony.” Yuffie snickered. “God Bless the cynical asshat who invented the prenuptial agreement.”

“Can we talk about something else?!” Aria burst out. “Seriously, can we talk about or do literally anything else besides stroking the ego of the dweeb who fucked up Ozpin’s marriage?!”

“The hell are you going off on me for?!” Jack gawked.

“I get it!” She continues unbidden. “I fucked up, okay?! Forgive me for not wanting my dad to leave us and start another, better family with some pretty young thing like Hanna’s dad did! And forgive me for not wanting to see my mom get emotionally fucked over like Hanna’s mom did when their marriage fell apart!

“You know I had to bunk with Spencer for a week because my mom didn’t even want me in the house?! Hell, she wouldn’t even talk to me, let alone look me in the eye up until Ezra got arrested!

“And, yes Momo! I did try to apologize to my mom, and I confronted Meredith and asked her to stop seeing my dad, but she refused!*” She snaps, making the Asian girl wince. “I did everything I could to try and make my mom forgive me! I got her apology flowers, I made her a quilt, Emily helped me bake her a cake once.” Aria then let out a sound akin to a sob and a cackle. “For fuck’s sake, I even painted a red ‘A’ on Meredith’s chest at their engagement party right where my mom could see it! And she didn’t even thank me!”

Gary’s brows raised in response. “Why exactly did you write a red ‘A’ on your father’s mistress–aka the woman who’s going to be your stepmother as a means of apologizing to your mom for lying?”

“Because of The Scarlet Letter, duh*.”

Alice face-palmed.

“What?” Aria snaps defensively.

“No wonder you’re failing English,” Jack snorted. “you’re an idiot.”

“Excuse me?!” The younger girl bristled.

“The Scarlet Letter is about a single mother who refuses to divulge the identity of her affair baby’s biological father, which Hester was forced to do so more or less because her community didn’t want said illegitimate child to grow up without a father.” Mercury explains. “And Hester wears the red ‘A’ for only one hour. The only reason she continues to wear it is out of religious guilt and for having a baby out of wedlock. Literally nobody thinks of her in slutty or derogatory terms, and even her enemies recognize that she’s a decent person and a good mother who’s doing her best and only wants what’s best for her daughter.”

“That,” Yaoyoruzu cuts in. “and neither the text, nor Hawthorne himself ever refer to Hester in degrading terms. The whole slut-shaming idea came from people who never even read the book–like you.”

“I didn’t want to end up like Hanna!”

“Well, duh,” Flash retorts. “You’re not Hanna! And maybe you should just come clean to your parents and Mike about all of this instead of trauma dumping on us.”

“Did you not hear a word I just said?!” Aria snarked. “They won’t talk to me!”

“Maybe it’s not just about your parents marriage failing, or what happened to Mr. Fitz, maybe it’s not about your parents at all but you.” Alice mused. “Staying angry with someone is easy – you can stay angry at your father for cheating on your mum, you can stay angry at his mistress for seducing him despite knowing that he was married and had children, you can stay angry at your mum for taking her pain out on you. Because staying mad at someone and holding onto that grudge no matter how unhealthy it is, that’s easy. Way easier than getting at the root of the problem, because that means acknowledging that it wasn’t all your fault. That your father could have come clean about his infidelity but he chose not to, that he’d rather leave the country than own up to his problems. That your mother finding out would have happened eventually, but instead of you, your father or his mistress telling her she had to find out from an anonymous hacker–an outside source, and she took her pain out on you. And that they didn’t bother talking to you until your brother told them what happened with Mr. Fitz and they suddenly wanted to be “good parents”.” Aria crossed her arms over her chest and turned away.

“The problem isn’t the fact that you want your parents to talk to you again,” Alice continued, paying the younger girl’s actions no heed. “It’s that you want to blame yourself for your family falling apart.

“After all, you knew your father was having an affair with Meredith, and you chose to keep that a secret – not just from your mother, but you also kept it from your little brother. You hurt them. Yes, you wanted you keep your family together, and you felt pressured into keeping your father’s secret, but that doesn’t negate the fact that you still hurt your mum and Mike. What’s more, you believe that you should be hurt in return, since – from your perspective – it’s the only way you’ll be able to atone for the things you did, to the people you hurt.

“But, what you’re doing isn’t atonement, let alone putting up a martyr mask, it’s self-deprication. Trust me, I know the difference. I’ve done some of the things you’ve done, and believe me when I say flinging around excess guilt helps no one, least of all yourself.” Aria’s shoulders slumped. “What you did wasn’t okay and I’m going to downplay or sugarcoat it, but you have to stop demonizing yourself. It’s not going to work–your friends know it, your parents know it, and deep down you know it too. And, truth be told, the only person you’re screwing over is yourself. So cut the bullshit and tell them how this has been affecting you. I know you don’t want to talk about it for obvious reasons, but nothing is going to change unless you cut the bullshit, drop the martyr mask, and just say what you feel. The phrase ‘The truth shall set you free’ exists for a reason.”

Aria considered the goth’s words for a moment, then slumped. “Fuck all of this.” She said instead, grabbing the whiskey bottle. “At least, I can take comfort in the fact that none of my friends molested me or drugged me in public.”

“Nah, you just bullied people at the behest of your Queen Bee.” Mercury chirped.

“We didn’t bully people.”

“Aria’s right,” Flash chimed in. “It was Alison who did most of the bullying.”

“Are you talking about the girl that died three years ago?” Alice asks.

“Yeah, Ali was a bitch. Although,” Mercury paused. “I don’t know if she was always like that.” Then he shrugged. “Probably happened over time.”

“Was that before or after the evil twin unveiled herself?” Aria snorted.

Yeah, you heard that right. Alison Dilaurentus had a younger* twin sister, Courtney (Pretty Little Liars Series); of the two, Courtney was the “good” twin–at least, in comparison to Alison.

According to their older brother Jason (Pretty Little Liars Series), Ali resented the fact that, despite being the prettier twin* Courtney was the more likable of the two and Ali decided to rectify that by fucking up her life and making Courtney out to be the bad guy (apparently grade schoolers can be diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia*), and convinced their parents to ship Courtney off to a mental hospital in Kern County. And, they were so embarrassed of the fact that they had a kid in the looney bin that they changed their names and pretended that they only had one daughter: Alison*! Apparently, that was the whole damn point of them relocating to Sunnydale; because, heaven forbid the neighbors judge them for having a “crazy” daughter.

Ali liked to switch places with Courtney; said she “liked wearing her face”. But, Courtney didn’t, not that Ali cared.

One day, when Courtney came to visit, she ran into Aria, Emily, Spencer and Hanna and decided to befriend them… Only, she did so by pretending to be Ali. But, in order to keep being Ali, Courtney made Ali pretend to be her and sent her sister to the looney bin in her place.

Before “Ali”, Aria, Emily, Spencer and Hanna were considered “losers”. Then Courtney, or “Ali” came along and changed all of that, Like their flesh and blood fairy godmother. She made them popular, the girls everyone envied yet wanted to be, and she gave them all the benefits that came with it.

The night she disappeared, the real Alison escaped, tracked Courtney down, killed her, and buried her in their backyard with the help of Courtney’s ex-boyfriend Nick Maxwell (Pretty Little Liars Series).

One would think that their mother would have done something rational. But no, instead of doing the right thing, she told the real Ali that she was going back to the looney bin and fed her a very large sleeping pill. But, she lied.

Instead, Jessica Dilaurentus (Pretty Little Liars Series) did something much much worse.

The night Courtney died, Mrs. Dilaurentus went to Nick’s house, dragged the real half-asleep Ali into the backyard, gave him a knife, and told him to “get it over with.” or else she would tell the police about what he had done to Courtney.

And Nick did just that.

Shortly after Ali was believed dead, the Dilaurentus’ moved to the other side of town.

And, they would have gotten away with it too, were it not for the new occupant’s 13-year-old twin son and daughter deciding to look into the case and busting their sorry asses (apparently, they had experience over their summer spent with their Great Uncle Stan* in Oregon*).

“Who would have thought two middle schoolers found out shit that grown ass adults wouldn’t have?” Jack snorted.

“Still doesn’t change the fact that Ali and Courtney were nasty.” Mercury stated.

“Courtney wasn’t that bad.” Aria dismissed.

“She used to make fun of Caleb (Pretty Little Liars Series) and Mona (Pretty Little Liars Series).” Flash pointed out. “Caleb I understood–to an extent, he was a dweeb. But, ragging on “Loser Mona” all the time?” He scoffed. “Creative nickname, by the way.”

“Ali was the one who did most of that.” Aria deflected.

“But, you didn’t stop her.” Gary pointed out. “There is a difference between acting like a bully and pretending not to be. I know a bystander when I see one.”

“Sounds like you speak from experience.” Aria retorted. “Most of it was harmless.” She defended. “You know, just making fun of people and shit–sticks and stones.”

“Hurt just as much as physical abuse.” Yuffie stated, looking uncomfortable. “Trust me, I speak from experience.”

“We didn’t do anything bad!” Aria defended, then winced. “Except, well… Except for the Jenna Thing.”

“The Jenna Thing?” Mercury echoes.

“Who is Jenna (Pretty Little Liars Series)?” Luna asks.

“Jenna Marshall-Cavanaugh,” Flash elaborated. “I went to middle school with her and her stepbrother, Toby (Pretty Little Liars Series). Courtney used to bully her.”

“It wasn’t that bad.” Aria dismissed.

“Courtney used to give Jenna apples soaked in toilet water and leave little notes attached saying ‘Have a bite Snow*’.” The athlete retorted, to which the others gawked at her.

“Dude!” Yuffie gaped in disgust.

“Okay, there was some mild jealousy regarding Jenna’s looks, but we cut it out after the apples thing got out of hand.” Aria says, then she grimaced. “And then, the Jenna Thing happened.”

“What even is the “Jenna Thing”?” Gary asked, using air quotes.

Aria bit her lip as she mulled over what to say, before ultimately going for the truth. “It wasn’t my idea.” She began.

“What was?” Momo pressed, looking concerned.

Aria grabbed the whiskey bottle and took a long swig. Afterwhich she said, “Toby took the fall for something we did.”

Flash and Mercury’s jaws dropped.

“You psychotic bitch.” Mercury gasped.

“It wasn’t my idea!”

“But, you went along with it!” Mercury snarls. “And, you kept that a secret?! Fuck, Aria! I thought you and Emily were the stable ones in your friend group!”

“What did you do?” The unnerved Alice asked them.

Flash broke the silence, “She’s the reason Jenna went blind.”

The others gaped at her in horror.

“Courtney said she saw Toby peeking on us during a sleepover,” Aria says, voice dull. “Everyone knows that Peeping Toms deserve a butt-whooping, so we decided to get back at him by pulling a prank.”

“Get back at him, how?” Jack asks nervously.

“Courtney stole one of his firecrackers, and lit it in his tree house,” Aria explains, the aghast looks on everyone’s faces deepening. “We just wanted to scare him!” She defends weakly. “Y’know, freak him out a bit. We didn’t know Jenna was in there until we heard her screaming and the window exploded.” Taking another swig, she continues. “Courtney threatened Toby, she told him that she would tell people that Toby’s dad was molesting Jenna unless he took the fall and left town, and that’s what he did. Made and gifted us these neat little friendship bracelets too, to make sure we kept our mouths shut*.” She says, smiling sardonically as she held up her left wrist which had a woven band with her name on it.

“You’re a bully.” Yuffie realized.

“Yeah, I know!” Aria snapped, taking another swing from the bottle. “This is the part where I’d say, “Yeah, but I grew out of that.” But, I’m sick of lying to myself.”

“Why in the hell would you keep something like that a secret?” The aghast Alice asked her.

“We were supposed to put on a light show, instead Jenna got sent to the hospital and now she needs a dog to see for her.” Aria griped. “And, even if we had told the cops, do you honestly believe that Courtney would have confessed? She would have made us out to be the instigators to save herself, and you guys know it too.” Aria took another large gulp. “I didn’t even know Toby, but I didn’t want him to get sent away either.”

“Well, why’d you do it then?!” Momo spoke up.

“I don’t know!” Aria snapped frustratedly. “Because I’m a bitch?! Because I’m a mindless little worker bee who stopped functioning the second her Queen fell off the face of the earth?!” She slumped, pawning the bottle over to Gary. “I-I don’t know, it-it was the effect the twins had on people. You wanted them to like you, no matter what it took or how low you sunk. You wanted to wow them–to impress them, didn’t matter what you did so long as Courtney or Ali had their eyes on you; ‘cause if Courtney or Ali got bored or decided that they didn’t like you then,” She shrugs. “Bye-bye seat at the lunch table.”

“Courtney and Alison don’t sound like they were good friends.” Luna says.

“She…” Aria slumped. “Okay, Courtney wasn’t a good friend. Yeah, she was pretty, sociable, smart, like people smart. She-she knew what made you tick, knew what would make people like you or hate you, and make sure that they kept their eyes on you. And she… Courtney and Ali were mean. Yeah, Ali was the more obvious of the two, but Courtney.” Aria shook her head. “The things she’d say and do–one second she’d be sweet as can be and even let you cry on her shoulder, then hold it against you once the tears were dry.”

“Like Snow White, but you only see the Evil Queen.” Flash says. “That’s the kind of vibe I got off of the twins – pretty on the outside, but, nasty inside.”

“I was more concerned over Courtney, if anything.” Mercury said.

“Why?” Aria asked him.

“‘Cause of Ian Thomas (Pretty Little Liars Series).”

“Who’s Ian Thomas?” Alice asks.

“He dated Spencer’s older sister, Melissa (Pretty Little Liars Series),” Aria explained. “And, he also used to flirt with Spencer and Ali a lot.”

“That’s kind of gross.” Gary frowned.

“Flirting with two middle schoolers, or flirting with a middle schooler who happens to be his on-again, off-again girlfriend’s kid sister?” Yuffie asks him.

“Both.”

“Spencer really liked him, but she and Ian never did anything because she knew Melissa never stopped loving him.” Aria explains. “But, the twins never reciprocated Ian’s advances – Courtney even told me that he creeped her out.”

“Still,” Mercury says. “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel some pity over them, probably because I also come from a fucked up family.”

“Your Old Man and my Old Man should go bowling,” Flash joked. “Compare notes on how to best fuck-up your kids.”

“I’m gonna love my kids.” Yuffie says. “I’m gonna make sure that they know that they’re loved from day one.”

“I don’t think I’m going to have children.” Alice admits. “I mean, I’m fucked up. I’m not exaggerating or downplaying my mental health, I am fucked up. And… I don’t want to pass any of that onto my children.”

“There’s always adoption.” Gary piped up.

“Or, you could try your luck with surrogacy,” Jack says. “That’s what my parents did.” Then he snorts. “One would think that a thousand some dollar petri dish baby would be worth noticing but nope.” He says, popping the ‘p’. “Unless I’m climbing the academic ladder, they wouldn’t give less of a shit about what I do.”

“I’m glad my dad doesn’t give a shit.” Mercury sighed. “Yeah, living with Roman and Neo beats getting my ass handed to me all the time, but… It’d be nice to know that my sperm donor gave a smidgeon of a shit.”

“I wish my old man didn’t give a shit out me.” Flash blurted out.

“At least, it’s better than trying to mold your kid into the picture-perfect daughter who never complains and just sits and takes whatever bullshit is thrown her way.” Yaoyorozu snorts.

“I never wanted to be perfect.” Aria says. “I just wanted to live my life. But, when you grow up, people begin to expect certain things from you.”

“Like, don’t talk back to your elders.” Mercury snorts. “Or, don’t lie because it’s wrong, unless you say ‘I’m fine’ then do what you want.”

“So long as you stay within the lines.” Gary chimed in. “Because standing out is all well and good, but it’s more acceptable to fit in and go along with the in crowd.” Then he frowned. “Even if that means sacrificing your old self.”

“But, that’s the only way to get people to not bully you.” Yuffie says. “After all, easy targets make themselves known because they stand out. But, if you try to call them out on it or tell a teacher or authority figure like everyone and their mother tells you to do, you get shit on and ostracized further.”

“Oh, yes,” Luna giggled sardonically. “Because heaven forbid you try to stand up for yourself, when everyone knows that you brought everything on yourself by being “weird”.” She says, using air quotes. “The kids who do the things you do are always asking for it.”

“It doesn’t matter what you say or do, or how much you fight back,” Alice said dully. “In the end, it was your own damn fault for daring to stick out of the crowd or tell your assailant to go fuck themselves.”

“It’s horseshit.” Jack agreed. “And everybody knows it’s horseshit, but we gotta deal with that horseshit even after we graduate.” Folding his hands behind his head, he grumbled. “Same shit, different day, doesn’t matter when or where, it’s always the same.”

“Amen to that.” Aria mumbled…

=/=

<Now playing ‘Fix You’ by Coldplay>

Aria Montgomery knew exactly what kind of person she was (wanted needed to be).

Aria: When you try your best

But you don't succeed.

She was laid back, observant, empathetic, and wise beyond her years (at least, according to her friends and family). She wasn’t the kind of person who made a fuss over things, she took every unknown and curveball life would throw her way… Until she didn’t. Or couldn’t.

Aria: When you get what you want

But, not what you need.

Before the move, before the switch (before they even found out about the twins), and long before Courtney pretending to be Ali disappeared, Aria knew her place within the circle.

Courtney was the queen bee, the girl everyone feared yet adored. Courtney was the girl everyone wanted to be, and Aria and the others were her pretty little worker bees.

Aria: When you feel so tired

But, you can't sleep.

Spencer was the smart one… Save for the fact that she was always playing second fiddle to Melissa – “Melissa got a better grade on her paper when she was in X teacher’s class!” “It’s so unfair! Mom and Dad would never do this to Melissa!” Melissa this and Melissa that, Melissa Melissa Melissa all the damn TIME!-

Aria: Stuck in reverse.

Hanna was the nice one. If you have a nice one in your friend group, then you know what connotations that carries (Fat Hanna, fatass, porker, “oink! oink!” no wonder you’re old man left you-)

“I hate it!” Hanna screamed one day, throwing a Ho Ho against the wall in a fit of rage and making the others jump. “I don’t want to look like this anymore!” She wailed, waves of tears streaming down her face. “I don’t want to be ‘Fat Hanna’ anymore! I-I want to be pretty!” She sobbed, sinking into the floor as Ali wrapped her arms around the bawling girl’s shoulders. “I want to look like Ali–like the models in the magazines! I-” She sobbed. “I just want to be pretty…”

“You will,” Their “Ali” soothed, voice sweeter than honey. “We’ll help you.”

Aria: And the tears streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

Emily was the athletic one. And then she became the gay one.

Regarding Emily’s sexuality, her folks… When she first came out they weren’t as, accepting of her as they were now, her mom taking the longest to come around.

As for Aria… Aria was the quirky, artsy one.

And then she met E–Him.

Aria: When you love someone

But, it goes to waste.

It’s amazing how poorly a person’s reputation can go.

Seriously, Aria went from the pretty, yet weird art student who refused to participate in the frog dissection citing her dietary beliefs*, to the horny bitch who sunk her teeth into the new English teacher and got him fired within the semester.

Aria: Could it be worse?

Truthfully speaking? No.

…At least, not at the moment.

Aria: Lights will guide you home.

And ignite your bones.

And, I will try to fix you.

When her family learned about what happened between her and Ezra it–Well, it didn’t go over well, obviously. But, her folks…

Now that she thought back on it, they seemed less mad at her and more mad at the fact that E–that he took advantage of her and that Aria didn’t tell them.

Aria: And high above or down below.

Guess the saying “love is blind” rang true for her.

Aria: When you're too in love to let it go.

Hell, the main reason Aria refused to talk about what happened with Ezra is because she knew that it would end up turning into an argument: her parents trying to make her see that she was being taken advantage of and Aria refusing to believe it, her and Mike because she refused to apologize to him after he told on Fitz.

“Well, excuse me for trying to protect my sister!” He snapped one morning, storming off she heard him mutter. “Last time I ever do anything nice for you…”

Aria: But, if you never try,

You'll never know just what you're worth.

Guess the only good thing that came about, him getting fired was the fact that her mom started talking to her again. Albeit, not about things Aria wanted to talk about.

“Honey, talk to me.” Her mother, Ella (Pretty Little Liars Series) pleaded. “Please? This is getting ridiculous-”

“Like how you all but kicked me out of the house when we got back from Byron* (Pretty Little Liars Series) and Meredith’s engagement party?” Aria sneered. “You’re pathetic – no, you’re a fucking hypocrite. It’s no wonder Dad chose Meredith over us.”

Aria: Lights will guide you home.

And ignite your bones.

And, I will try to fix you.

Maybe there was a part of Aria that wanted to stay angry–to hold onto that anger because holding onto it was what kept her sane.

Angry at Meredith for picking up the affair right where she and Dad left off not long after they came back to America.

Angry at her father for giving in the first and second time.

Angry at her father and Courtney for hiding it – dad because of mom and Mike, and Courtney because she made fun of Aria over it and kept doing it even after Aria begged her to stop!*-

Angry at herself. Not just over her parents and Meredith, but also Mike; for hurting the people she cared about.

Aria: Tears stream down your face

When you lose something you cannot replace

Aria didn’t like the person she was becoming.

The Aria she was now was secretive, paranoid, petty – the worst part was, it wasn’t until now that she had begun to see it.

Aria: Tears stream down your face, and I…

“Like Snow White, but you only see the Evil Queen.” Flash had said.

Loath as she was to admit, the jock was right on the money.

Aria: Tears stream down your face,

I promise you I will learn from my mistakes.

Aria didn’t want to be that person. Not anymore.

And that’s when Aria realized something else: it wasn’t a matter of trying to stop being that person, it was that she didn’t know how to not keep being that person.

Aria: Tears stream down your face, and I…

But, she was going to try.

No, she will try. Not just for her friends and family, but because she owed it to herself.

She needed to do this for herself.

Aria: Lights will guide you home.

And ignite your bones.

And, I will try to fix you…