J.F.P.
CHAPTER TWO
J.F.P., 1975
James Potter was nervous.
Scratch that, he was downright worried. He hadn’t heard anything from Sirius, his best friend, in over two months and now he isn’t even on the express.
“I went to Surrey in the summer, you know. Not a long trip, we went to meet Petunias boyfriend. A right git. Spent the whole two days we were there talking about that horrible Thatcher. You know my da’s from a long line of miners? How Pet can date someone like that is beyond me. We’re Northerners for crying out loud, we should know better, you know?” Lily complained, raking her fingers through her long, red hair.
“Uh-huh.” He answered non-committedly, still deeply lost in his thoughts about Sirius.
“And Mum and me went to the corner shop and he threw a full on fit ‘cus- oh how’d ‘e put it- ‘We don’t go there, deary! It’s run by Pakis!” she screeched, putting on her best posh accent.
“What did you just say?”, James balked, halting to look at her finally, “I’m Indian, you know. And even if I were Pakistani-“
“Oh god!” she cut him off, “No! Weren’t you listening? I was saying Vernon, Petunias boyfriend said those thing! No! James I would never!” Lily looked up at him, eyes wide with disbelief at her own wrong-doing. “In hindsight I should have never said that word, even while I’m quoting something. I’m sorry James, I truly didn’t mean anything by it!”
“Oh, yeah. No worries… he sounds like a right git.”
“I’m sor-“
“Nah, don’t worry your pretty little head.” He joked, his smile not quite reaching his eyes, “ ‘bit distracted at the moment, Lils, sorry about that… do you know where Marlene could be? I’m surprised she wasn’t with you.”
Marlene McKinnon was one of their best friends. James, Peter and Sirius have known her since childhood- pureblood families tended to send their children to the lone wizard-only playgroup, kindergarten and elementary school there is. The Potters, along with the McKinnons, have continuously been a rather progressive family but the thought of sending their energetic child to a muggle school frightened them.
James has been known for his accidental magic early on and there wasn’t a lot his parents could do to supress it without causing lasting damage.
The Blacks did not appreciate the friendship their heir formed with known blood-traitors, but there wasn’t a lot they could do about that at the time, so Sirius became a constant fixture in their life.
“I’m not sure, usually she meets us in our compartment but she didn’t show up today… I haven’t seen Sirius either, come to think of it.”
“Yeah.” James mumbled, “me neither…”
“Any idea-”
“No,” he interrupted, “I don’t have an idea. I don’t know where he is, neither do I know where Marlene is or Regulus, Lily. Hell, even Snape is missing.”
“He’s not. I saw him about ten minutes ago. He was with Yaxley, bothering some first years.”
James halted, grabbing her by the elbow, “Where?”
“Down the train, when we were coming to find you. But you aren’t going to go look for him now, Potter, we have a prefects meeting in two minutes and I’m not covering for you just so you can hex some Slytherins!” she said sternly.
“Fine, let’s get this over with then. Maybe Regulus is at the meeting.”
He wasn’t.
Dorcas Meadowes, a Slytherin prefect and – since around Christmas last year – a friend of Marlene’s, was downright icy towards them at the meeting and James once again got an uncomfortable feeling in his stomach. It’s not like she usually was the friendliest or perkiest amongst their group of friends but she was always civil and kind. Her new friendship with Marlene came as a shock to them at first, seeing as Gryffindors and Slytherins historically didn’t get on, but it had worked out quite well in the last months of term. Dorcas was friends with Regulus, Barty Crouch Jr. and Evan Rosier and thus brought them with her every time they met up in Hogsmeade, mending Sirius’ and Regulus’ fractured relationship bit by bit by forcing them to interact with each other on neutral grounds.
When the meeting concluded, James wasted no time in grabbing his cloak from his trunk and stealthily following Dorcas to her compartment.
Once she joined her friends, he took off his cloak and knocked, not waiting for permission to enter, slid open the door and spoke, “Hey!” he greeted, putting on his best smile.
Four heads snapped in his direction but no one greeted him back.
“Uh, right. Good summer?” he tried again.
“What do you want, Potter?” Barty asked coolly, turning away to look out the window rather than at him.
“Well, uh, I thought I made that clear, what with asking about your summer hols.” James replied, dumbfounded by their reactions to him. “I was also coming to find you, Marlene, Lily was looking for you and… and I was wondering if any of you’d seen Reg?”
Before Marlene could even answer, Evan scoffed, “Wha’sit t’you, Potter?” his Yorkshire accent thickening in his apparent anger. “You got sum nerve-”
“Nah, we haven’t seen Reg yet. Or Sirius, if you even care.” Marlene interrupted sternly.
“I care.” He argued weakly, the guilt he’s been feeling all summer slamming right back into his gut.
“Funny way of showing that.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Don’t play dumb, James. I know you’re smarter than you let on. I’m not gonna lie, here, I’m not too fucking fussed with talking to you at the moment, so please kindly fuck off and you can tell Lily and the rest to do the same.”
“Marlene!” Dorcas chastised, she turned to James, giving him the first kind look he got since he went to seek them out, “Look, Potter, you can see that you aren’t exactly welcome here at the moment-”
“Or ever again.” Barty mumbled.
“-so could you maybe just leave for now. I’ve rounds soon and I’m guessing you as well.”
“I- yeah, I guess I can do that.” He murmured, feeling tears well up in his eyes. James has never been good at hiding his emotions but the last thing he wanted to do now is cry in front of people who apparently hate him, people he not long ago called his friends.
The funny feeling in his gut intensified tenfold with the added confusion from this encounter and he quickly hurried back to his compartment.
He wasn’t sure if he should tell the others what just happened, not wanting to hurt Remus even more than he already was. Or Lily. Marlene and Lily became quick friends in first year. Having grown up with magic Marlene made it her mission to integrate Lily into the magical society as best and as quick as possible.
So he decided against telling them right away, maybe he could do it in the common room after the feast, and went to attend his rounds.
The rest of the journey went without much commotion giving James a lot of time to think about this current situation but nothing he came up with made much sense.
Sirius was the one that hurt them. Hurt Remus.
Sirius was the one that endangered them. Nearly outing their illegal Animagus status to the world.
Sirius was the one who told Moonys biggest and darkest secret to their sworn enemy and nearly made a killer out of him.
And Sirius was the one pretending like nothing happened, like he didn’t nearly ruin all their lives.
James still doesn’t entirely understand what happened after the last full moon they spent together, the last night before they were leaving for summer hols. Sirius didn’t turn up, but Snape did. Wandered into the shack just as Moony was turning and if it hadn’t been for James’ quick reflexes he would have gotten killed or, in Remus’ opinion worse, turned.
Everything after that is kind of a blur, James somehow managed to get Snape out of there unharmed and the next thing he knows is he’s standing in Dumbledore’s office trying to get a word in. Of course, the headmaster knew all about Remus and surprisingly also about the Animagi and made Snape swear never to utter a word about it to anyone. And then Dumbledore asked how he found out, about Remus, about the shack, about the animals and the last thing James heard was Sirius’ name before collapsing.
The next day when he woke up Sirius’ belongings were missing from their dorm and, except for the note he sent at the beginning of summer, he hadn’t heard anything from his best friend again.
When they finally made it to the Great Hall, James scanned the tables thoroughly.
At the Slytherin table there was still no sign of Regulus. Evan, Barty and Dorcas sat huddled together at the far end, seemingly wanting nothing to do with the rest of their house. He caught his first glance of Snape, sitting surrounded by Yaxley, Crabbe and Goyle, looking far too at ease for James’ liking.
Looking over to his house own table, he saw Marlene sitting in between Frank Longbottom and Fabian Prewett.
He saw the second Lily caught sight of her friend, “Mar-”
James took her by the elbow and shushed her, “Not now.”
“What?”
“I’ll tell you later… just leave her be for now.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Just leave it now, Lily, please. She doesn’t want to talk to us right now. We’ll figure it out.”
Her wide eyes flittered between her friends but ultimately she nodded and sat down, staying uncharacteristically quiet for the rest of the feast just like everyone else around him. After the meal the prefects escorted the first years to their respective dorms and James has never felt so uncomfortable in his second home. He filled Lily in about what happened on the train and rushed to his dorm, mumbling a quick goodnight and drawing his curtains.
His last thought before sleep caught up to him was of his best friends.
The three boys slept in the next morning, happy that the first of September this year was a Friday meaning no class the next day. When they got down to breakfast, the Great Hall was already filled to the brim with students. There was a louder buzz than usual, constant glances thrown in the direction of the Slytherin table.
James loaded his plate before craning his neck to see what all the fuss was about.
And then he saw him.
Regulus was sitting next to Barty, talking in hushed voices with rushed movements. Occasionally his eyes would wander to the person on his other side and James’ breath hitched.
His hair was shorn, dark yellow bruises on his neck and jaw, his posture unsure as if he wanted to melt into the ground but James could pick him out of a line-up blindfolded. His sharp cheekbones, protruding even more than usual, the birthmark right under his lower lip and his slight crooked nose.
Sirius.
His grey eyes were cuttingly trained on something near the entrance and before James could say anything to his friends, Sirius shot up and quickly stalked out of the hall. Regulus startled, looking around confused until he saw his brother disappearing behind the door. He said something to the rest of them and the lot took off after Sirius.
“That was Sirius.” James said numbly loud enough for everybody to hear.
The first that got up and followed was Marlene, sparring the others into motion.
They were just around the corner when they heard the voices,
“… out if you don’t want to end up like last time, Black!” That’s Snape, James thought.
“You think you can run around with baby Death Eaters for a summer and scare me? I’ve lived with filth like you my whole life, I’ll be happy to demonstrate some of my mothers favourite spells.” Sirius sneered.
“Scemptumse-”
“Petrif-”
“STUPIFY!” Lily shouted and Sirius slumped backwards.
“SIRIUS!” Regulus was running forward, “Petrificus Totalus!” he sent off towards Snape before he could escape.
Sirius was on the floor convulsing and James ran.
“You stay the hell away!” Barty shouted, jumping in front of him to block his way. “Marlene get Pomfrey! Evan, Dorcas get McGonagall and Slughorn.” Everybody scrambled to do as they were told and Regulus shot up, wand pointed towards Lily.
“Locomotor Mortis!” he shouted.
Remus gasped, “What the fuck are you doing?”
“None of your business, mutt! Barty, cover Sirius.”
“Cover Sirius? Reggie, do you actually believe we would hurt him?” James murmured.
“You’ve lost the right to call me that, Potter.” He scoffed, “Some best friend you are, no letters, no calls, nothing! All summer long while his life was falling apart and where were you?! All of you?! You lot make yourself out to be so brave and loyal and when he needs you, you disappear. If it weren’t for that good for nothing Dumbledore we would have never come back here!”
What?
“REGULUS!” Regulus?, James thought, since when does McGonagall call him by his first name? “What in the world is going on here?”
But it wasn’t Regulus who answered her, instead it was Barty who spoke up again, still kneeling protectively next to Sirius, “Professor, this has to be enough to send him away. You can have my memory. Snape threatened him and then that one hexed him.”
“Don’t talk about her like that!” Remus shouted.
“Shut the fuck up, Lupin.”
“Mr. Crouch!” McGonagall shrieked but Barty only rolled his eyes.
“It’s like he’s having a seizure, Professor, I don’t know how to stop it. We sent Marlene to get Madame Pomfrey but they haven’t returned yet.”
Just then Madame Pomfrey turned the corner, an ashen faced Marlene hot on her heels. “Oh my, oh my,…” she mumbled, already levitating Sirius’ shaking body, “…poor boy, Regulus, dear, come along, come along. Minerva, come to the hospital wing once you’re done here, please.”
Slughorn spluttered, “What about him?” pointing at Snape’s still form.
“He’ll be fine.” She said coolly and made her way towards the Hospital wing, Regulus in tow.
“Horace, wake your student and bring him to the Headmasters. The rest of you will follow me, no exceptions.” She ordered, lifting the curse off of a teary eyed Lily.
“Professor, I… I didn’t… it was just a…” Lily stammered.
“I don’t want to hear anything from any of you until we get to the office. And I don’t much care what you sent after Sirius Black, Miss Evans, we don’t hex students. That also goes for prefects.” She said sternly.
Lily hung her head and nodded, silently following their Professor.
James searched for Remus’ gaze and when he found it, he saw for the first time the same guilt and confusion reflected in his eyes that James has been feeling for days now.