Eclipsed

The oppressive silence in the Gryffindor common room was broken only by the crackle of the fireplace and the rhythmic ticking of the grandfather clock. James settled on the couch, to the left of the worn armchair where Sirius sat slumped, staring blankly into the fire.

"Hey," James began hesitantly, "about Regulus…"

Sirius's head snapped up. "What about him? Did you talk to him? Did he say anything?"

James shook his head. "No, but… I did speak to Pandora earlier... you know, the Ravenclaw prefect?"

Sirius grunted, a flicker of annoyance crossing his features rather than suspicion. 

Sirius had known Pandora for years. Her family and his were distantly related, and they'd grown up attending the same pureblood gatherings and functions. In fact he’d thought that Regulus and Pandora would probably get married someday, before she’d been sorted into Ravenclaw and thrown a wrench in that plan. 

"Right, well," James continued quickly, "anyway, I asked her if she knew what had happened with Regulus, and apparently he’d been kept home because he was sick, that's all."

Relief washed over Sirius's face, before settling back into its concerned state. "He was pretty sick then, to be kept home from school so long? But why didn't they send him here, to Pomfrey, or St. Mungo’s even?"

James shrugged, forcing a casualness he didn't quite feel. "Maybe they just wanted him to rest at home for a while. You know how pureblood families are with all that, privacy and such."

Sirius let out a slow exhale, his shoulders slumping slightly. "That makes sense, I guess. Thanks, James. I was starting to think…" He trailed off, unable to voice the dark thoughts that had plagued him.

James squeezed his friend's shoulder in a brief gesture of support. "Don't worry, Padfoot. He's back, which means he’s probably doing a lot better now."

James knew better than to keep digging at that wound. He knew the sight of Regulus with Avery and Mulciber had fueled Sirius's fears, but revealing the truth about the Dark Mark, the illness, and the Blacks' callous treatment would only send his friend spiraling.

Instead, James deflected the question with a playful nudge. "Come on, mate, cheer up a bit. How about a game of Exploding Snap? Loser buys the next batch of chocolate frogs."

Sirius, ever the sucker for a challenge, managed a weak smile. "You're on, Prongs. But you better be prepared to lose."

The game that followed was a half-hearted affair, far from their usual boisterous duels. But the effort brought a semblance of normalcy back to the common room. As they traded barbs and exploding snaps, James couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt over his half-truths. Pandora had sworn him to secrecy, and while James understood the need for it, he couldn't shake the feeling that they were walking a tightrope, the truth about Regulus a heavy, unspoken burden.

Despite James’, Remus’, and even Peter’s recommendations, Sirius couldn’t let the situation with Regulus go, and decided to try and see how he could possibly get close enough to his brother to ask what had happened. 

The oppressive silence in the Hospital Wing was broken only by the rhythmic tick of a clock and the low murmur of Madam Pomfrey fussing over vials of glistening potions. Sirius, fidgeting with his own set of vials he was organizing, finally blurted out his request.

"Madam Pomfrey," he began, turning up the charm as much as possible, "is there any way you could… you know, reach out to Regulus for me? Just to check in on him? See how his recovery is going?"

Madam Pomfrey raised an eyebrow, her gaze sharp behind her spectacles. "Mr. Black," she said, her voice clipped, "while I understand your concern for your brother, I have no reason to reach out to him. He hasn’t come to see me since he’s been back. I can only assume that if he needed any medical treatment, he would’ve been to see me.” 

Sirius set down the vials, harder than he’d meant to. "But he was ill, wasn't he? That's why he missed the first term. I just want to know… I have to know.” She gave him a look, but Sirius plowed on. “I just need to make sure he's alright."

The raw emotion in his voice seemed to soften Pomfrey's stern demeanor. She sighed, a hint of sympathy flickering in her eyes. "Very well, Mr. Black. But I can't guarantee he'll agree to see you."

A flicker of hope sparked in Sirius' eyes. "Thank you, Madam Pomfrey. Just a few minutes would mean a lot to me."

The following afternoon, while Sirius was organizing the copious medical records left behind by Pomfrey’s predecessor, the creaking doors of the hospital wing caught his attention, and looking up, he saw Regulus, up close for the first time in almost a year. 

Standing in the doorway, his brother’s face was paler than usual, a few pieces of long, dark hair hanging limply around his face, the rest of it tied back neatly at the nape of his neck, in the pureblood style. He was clad in a dark sweater and a pair of dark, well-fitting trousers beneath a fine-looking dark robe– a subdued, traditional look for a young wizard.

Sirius' heart hammered in his chest. "Regulus!" he blurted out, a mix of relief and worry flooding his face. He scrambled to his feet, nearly upsetting the chair in his haste.

Regulus, however, remained by the door, his expression a mask of indifference. "What do you want, Sirius?" he asked, his voice laced with a coldness that sent a shiver down Sirius' spine.

"I… I’m just glad to see you back," Sirius stammered, a touch of embarrassment creeping into his voice. "I was worried when you didn’t come back to school last term. How are you feeling?"

Regulus scoffed, the sound harsh in the sterile silence. "Fine." He shifted uncomfortably, his gaze flickering around the room as if searching for an escape route. “Where’s Pomfrey, she wanted to see me?” 

"You don't look fine," Sirius pressed, his voice gentle.

Regulus stiffened. "It's none of your concern, Sirius." He started to turn away, his voice tight with barely concealed anger. "I don't need your–” 

"Regulus, please," Sirius pleaded, stepping closer. "We're brothers. I care about you, even if you don’t care about me."

Regulus paused, his back to Sirius. A tense silence stretched between them, heavy with unspoken emotions. Finally, Regulus spoke, his voice barely a whisper.

"Don’t you dare say I don’t care about…” Regulus turned to look at his brother, and for a moment, Sirius could see the little boy he’d been having nightmares about every day, before his blank mask came back up. “Just… leave me alone, Sirius. Please."

Before Sirius could respond, Regulus swiftly turned and walked out of the Hospital Wing, leaving Sirius standing alone, and the commotion brought Pomfrey out of her office. The brief hope of reconnection had been extinguished, replaced by a cold, unsettling fear.

“Was that him, then?” she asked, and Sirius nodded, a lump stuck in his throat. “Pity, I was actually hoping to see him. He looks dreadful, doesn’t he?” 

Sirius nodded again, and swallowed. “What… What's wrong with him?” She was silent, and Sirius became suddenly very upset with her too. “I know you know,” he accused sharply. “Stop trying to keep me in the–” 

Madam Pomfrey cut him off with a sigh, the lines on her face deepening. "Mr. Black, I understand your concern, but patient confidentiality—"

Sirius cut her off, panic bubbling to the surface. "Please, I just… Is it my fault? Is it because I left? Did they do something to him?” 

Sensing his distress, Pomfrey guided Sirius towards her office, the door clicking shut behind them. 

“Take a seat, Sirius,” she said gently, and as he did, she took a seat behind her desk, removing her nurse’s cap, allowing her short, brown hair to fall softly around her face. She looked a lot younger that way, Sirius noticed, and a lot more conflicted over what to do next. 

“This needs to stay between us. I need your brother to trust me, alright? So that he will come see me when he needs me."

 Sirius nodded eagerly, his concerns momentarily overshadowed by hope.

She began to speak, her voice gentle. "Have you heard of Davenpoint Nosoi?"

He shook his head. 

Taking a deep breath, Madam Pomfrey explained. "It's a rare illness, mostly affecting pureblood families. It's not well-known, primarily because the families affected tend to downplay its existence. It's caused by a lack of genetic diversity within bloodlines, a consequence of… intermarriage within the same families over generations." she hesitated, choosing her words carefully, "it weakens your magical core, making you susceptible to magical illnesses and chronic pain, exhaustion, the list goes on."

Sirius listened intently, understanding settling uncomfortably in his stomach. A memory flickered across his mind. Regulus, a skinny, pale child, clinging to Sirius uncomfortably as he tried to sleep, with frequent fevers, constant malaise, and no energy or desire to run and play with Sirius and the other children at family gatherings. It all made a horrifying kind of sense.

Madam Pomfrey continued. “Ever since he arrived at Hogwarts, several of the professors, Professor Slughorn in particular, expressed concern about his well-being. He was constantly pale, exhausted, and couldn’t seem to keep up with the workload physically, struggling even with simple spells, although he was obviously quite bright, when looking at his written assignments. It was clear to all of us that this was more than just childhood illnesses, or a poor constitution."

Sirius leaned forward, hanging on her every word. "And then?"

"I conducted a thorough examination," Pomfrey said, "and the results were inconclusive at first. But his symptoms… the magical depletion, the chronic pain, the weakness… I couldn’t figure it out, so I requested that a specialist from St. Mungo's come, and after that, they diagnosed Regulus with Davenpoint Nosoi Syndrome."

A horrifying realization dawned on Sirius. "So Regulus has been sick all this time? Why didn't he tell me? Why didn't you tell me?"

"Believe me, love," Madam Pomfrey said, her voice soft, "I wish I could’ve told you. When I informed your– his family of the diagnosis, they were… resistant. They refused to accept the diagnosis, and insisted Regulus was perfectly healthy."

Sirius scoffed. "Of course they did. It’s not like everyone knows he’s been ill all his life.” 

"Despite their resistance," Madam Pomfrey went on, "I managed to implement a treatment plan with the help of the specialist- he's been taking one potion to manage his symptoms and another to regulate his magical energy for the past five years or so. It wasn't a cure, but it helped him function somewhat normally. Regulus, bless his heart, cooperated with trying out new treatments for years, and as I’m sure you noticed, he’d been getting stronger, more energetic as the years have gone by. His magic had been more consistent, he had more stamina to do more complex spells, before this past term, at least. I tried to reach out to him through Professor Slughorn when I heard he was ill, then again when he returned to school, but he apparently didn't want to continue with the treatments further."

Sirius felt a flicker of relief, quickly extinguished by a new wave of worry. "That's why he so ill again. Why isn't he taking them anymore?"

Madam Pomfrey shook her head, a worried frown creasing her brow. "That's what I'm trying to determine. Not taking his medication is a dangerous choice. Without proper management, his condition can be… debilitating.” 

A cold dread settled over Sirius. The implications were horrifying. The Blacks' refusal to acknowledge Regulus' illness, the sudden stop in his treatment – it all painted a bleak picture. If Pomfrey was to be believed, Regulus seemed trapped between his family's pride and his own illness. 

"Madam Pomfrey," Sirius whispered, his voice thick with emotion, "isn't there anything you can do? Can't you make him take the potion again?"

Pomfrey's face softened with sympathy. "I can try, Sirius. But ultimately, it's Regulus' choice, and unfortunately, your parents’ as well.” She didn’t correct herself, and Sirius didn’t either. Relief that he finally understood what was plaguing Regulus warred with a cold dread that settled in the pit of his stomach.

He mumbled a hoarse "thank you" to Madam Pomfrey, the words barely scraping past the lump in his throat. Her sympathetic expression offered little comfort, but it was a kindness he acknowledged with a weak nod.

The walk back to the Gryffindor common room was a blur. Reaching the portrait of the Fat Lady, Sirius muttered the password with a weary voice, the familiar warmth of the common room offering little comfort as he slogged past it and up the stairs. The dorm room was empty, James presumably off with Lily, and Peter likely off trying to mend his failing relationship. Remus had been tasked with tutoring some younger students, and wasn’t going to be back for a while either.  

Without a thought, Sirius shed his shoes and outer robes, collapsing onto Remus' bed. The crisp sheets felt cold against his burning skin, but he didn't have the energy to move. He used his last stores of it to curl into a fetal position, burying his face into the pillow, the scent of Remus's lavender soap a small comfort while his mind spiraled into every possible bad outcome for his younger brother. 

Sirius hadn't realized how much he'd been holding back until he felt the familiar weight of Remus settling in beside him, what seemed like hours later. With no reaction, Remus placed a tentative hand on Sirius's shoulder. "Sirius, love, come on, talk to me. What's wrong?"

Sirius looked at him, the dam threatening to burst. He yearned to tell Remus everything, to unload the heavy burden he carried. But something held him back – a fear of burdening Remus, of tarnishing their moment of solace with his family's problems.

"Just… a rough day," Sirius finally managed, his voice thick with emotion. "Can I… can you just hold me?"

Remus didn't hesitate. He wrapped his arms around Sirius, his warm embrace a silent reassurance. Sirius buried his face in Remus's shoulder, the familiar scent of earth and worn leather a soothing balm. Remus held him close, stroking his hair gently, his silence a powerful language that spoke volumes.

Sirius didn't explain. He knew Remus would want to know everything, would offer advice, would strategize a plan. But right now, all he craved was the quiet comfort of his boyfriend's presence, a safe place away from the scary places in his mind.