Chapter 1
They were perfect. Absolutely perfect. James was sure, his boyfriend was the best. They were 100% meant to be.
Regulus doesn’t.
And it’s not like he doesn’t love James, he loves James with all his heart but that’s the thing isn’t it? Everything he loves is taken from him.
He knows, he just knows that James will be taken away from him as well, or pushed away by Regulus himself because either way it’s gonna hurt both of them.
“It can’t always be this good, you know? James, I love you, I really do but…”
“But what? Reg baby tell me what’s wrong?”
“It’s… James, please don’t be mad please don’t hate me for this I didn’t have a choice” Regulus said, tears welling up in his eyes before showing James something.
The mark.
The dark mark.
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Regulus Arcturus Black was a Death Eater.
Death Eater
Death Eater
Death Eater
James’ lover, and a Death Eater.
“Why? Why did you do this?”
“If I didn’t they would’ve gone to your house. They would’ve taken Sirius”
Fuck
Reg was right
Sirius, his brother. James’ best friend, or brother, or both. Regulus’ brother. And all Regulus did was protecting him. Protecting them.
“You know what you’ve done, right?”
“What? Got tortured, gave my life to some snake-obsessed man who’s scared of death, risk my life, risk losing my friends, risk losing you only to protect my brother who most likely is still gonna hate me? Yeah, that’s what I’ve done”
“He doesn’t hate you. Sirius, I mean. And you won’t lose me”
“You have to. If you don’t he’ll hurt you”
“I’ve been hurting all my life. It never bothered me as long as it’s for the people I love”
“You… you shouldn’t be hurting because of me”
“You’re worth it”
“But what if you lose me, huh? What if, after all of this, I leave or I die?”
“What if I don’t lose you? What if you stay alive and what if we live happily ever after?”
“There’s no chance of that”
“Then let’s make the high worth the pain and you know, just try. Just try. For the hope of it all”