mr. deer obsessor
James
An enjoyable, yet mostly uneventful hour passes before a sharp rap on a door sounds distantly from somewhere in the building. Remus, Mary and Marlene fly to their feet and walk swiftly out of the room with purpose whilst Dorcas, James and Sirius hang back, trailing behind them with much less energy. The three of them talk amongst themselves until they hear a door creaking and being slammed shut. A new voice - well it’s the same one from Mary’s phone call, though it sounds surprisingly different in real life - echoes down the hallway from the main coffee shop area. They emerge from the doorway of vines, Sirius getting mildly tangled up in them in the process, to see a fiery red-headed girl, hands full with bags, listening with a bright smile to Remus chattering away. Dorcas struts up to the group with ease, exchanging hugs and greetings with Lily. Sirius and James are slightly more hesitant - unsure of whether they should be included in the group’s catchup. After a few seconds of hovering behind Marlene, Lily notices them and her expression flips to curiosity, though her smile doesn’t leave her face.
“This is James and Sirius?” She turns her head to Remus for confirmation - to which his grin widens as he nods - and looks back to where Sirius is standing awkwardly beside James, who is trying very hard to look as casual as possible. “I’m Lily, it’s nice to meet you but is someone going to tell me who the hell you are and why we are having a sleepover?” And so they all take a few of Lily’s bags back to the break room, where they were originally sat, whilst Sirius and James, with a bit of help from Mary, give a summarised explanation on how Sirius is actually famous, why they are in the shop and can’t leave for a while yet. Lily’s reaction to this is having no reaction apparently, the friendly smile never left, but apart from that her face stays completely neutral. James can tell it scares Sirius slightly - normally he gets at least a raised eyebrow, if not a gasp or two.
“I thought something totally weird and dramatic must have happened for Remus to agree to this,” She admits after they finish. The group is all sprawled out in various places of the room, talking and laughing. James realises that’s mostly all they have been doing since he and Sirius arrived—talking and laughing. He grins at her, taking a swig from his can of soda.
“Yes, well Sirius is totally weird and dramatic,” He nods mournfully before getting shoved aggressively in the shoulder.
“Like you're one to talk, Mr. Deer Obsessor,” Mary quips, smirking at James’ gasp and feigned shock. Sirius cackles and fist-bumps her to James’ outrage. Lily opens her mouth to speak but gets cut off.
“Sirius,” Dorcas says loudly, quietening everyone, and sticks out her arm that is holding her phone in his direction. James can only just make out from where he is sitting that it’s open on someone’s post on what looks like a news website; Sirius stands and walks over to Dorcas’ armchair, eyes scanning the phone quickly. His head swivels round to James and back to the picture the screen shows. He sighs, running a hand over his face. They all stare up at him expectantly. He lifts his fingers to reveal a weak smile that clearly isn’t genuine and a raw sadness behind this mask he has tried to put on for everyone else in the room.
Fear bubbles inside of James, whatever this is, it can’t be good. Sirius knows about Regulus, a very tiny, very unhelpful voice inside his brain whispers. No, that’s impossible, he thinks to himself, although it’s not though is it? Sirius will find out sooner or later, whether James likes it or not, and it’s up to James if he buckles the fuck up and tells him beforehand or if he just lets him walk in on the two of them kissing one day and have him put two and two together that way. The first option is the responsible thing to do but since when has James ever been responsible, anyway? Truth is, he's scared. He was scared after the first time him and Regulus kissed in boarding school that Sirius would be angry as the brothers were not on good terms at that point. Now, he's even more scared of the shameful truth that he's kept it a secret for far too long. Every second he goes without telling Sirius is another reason for Sirius to hate him more when he finds out, and that scares James the most. His spiralling gets interrupted by Sirius himself, though it’s probably for the better that that train of thought stopped.
“The paparazzi photos have been released,” Sirius’ smile turns into more of a grimace. Looking at the pictures that have been taken after a paparazzi attack is always hard for Sirius, James knows. It can be hard for him too. It’s something to do with reliving the moment and violations of his privacy and how Sirius, very near his lowest, has been captured and put on the internet for all to see - that's what his therapist tells him anyway. The fact it’s all normalised makes him sick to his fucking stomach.
Despite the bad news, a small tide of relief washes over him somewhere deep down, drowning his previous nerves about Sirius knowing of him and Regulus. Though those worries can be dealt with later - or rather not dealt with - no way is he telling Sirius now, when they can’t even go back to their own apartments at the moment. He needs to see these pictures so he can assess the damage of the situation. So he can be there for Sirius.
“They better have gotten my good side,” James says drily, striding over to the phone with a sigh. The photos cause some ball of emotion he can’t place to rise inside of him - nausea, sadness, dread, anger. All of them tangled together into a mess inside his mind that makes him want to throw up and throw things at the same time. It seems like an over dramatic reaction to a few pictures snapped of them. Except Sirius is ghostly pale in the flash of white light, his eyes are filled with tears and he’s clearly on the brink of a panic attack as he stares dead into the camera, face pleading for help. And James. James’ face is contorted with fury as he is captured in the middle of screaming at someone to take a fucking step back away from him. He looks terrifying. He doesn’t even recognise himself. Thousands, maybe even millions of people will see this. The thought makes him want to curl up in a ball and hide in a corner. He hates how Regulus will have to see him like that. His parents will have to see him like that. The people sitting in this room will have to see him like that. The worst version of himself. He forces his gaze away from the screen, decidedly ignoring the small written paragraphs beneath each one, knowing he probably should read them but also knowing he'll only anger himself even further if he does, and he just doesn't think his already rather distressed mind can handle that right now. Instead, he looks at Sirius.
The pain behind his eyes is so much worse to see than any photo or stupid news article. James has a strong urge to tell a joke - to make him laugh, to cheer him up. That isn’t what Sirius needs right now though, and so he steps out of his comfort zone and doesn’t cower behind humour. He pulls his best friend into a tight hug instead, arms wrapped around each other in a net of safety and comfort.
“You could call Karkaroff, right? Ask him to get them taken down?” He suggests, voice muffled, buried in Sirius’ shoulder. He feels Sirius’ head shake from side to side against his jumper. He doesn’t know why he expected any different - it’s fucking Karkaroff they’re talking about. He rarely lets Sirius get his way as some form of ridiculous punishment, it makes his blood boil thinking about it.
“It’s okay, we’re okay,” He says, hopefully soothingly, as he lifts his head and slowly pulls their bodies apart, but he still clasps on to Sirius’ hands, staring intensely at him, “we’ll figure this out,” Sirius nods and sighs, swiping his fingers quickly across his watery eyes.
“I don’t know if it’s any help but,” Dorcas begins, smiling sadly up at them both as they turn to her, “I’ve been checking this whole time to see if the pictures had been posted yet, and this is the first time they have been. Doesn’t that mean that if we act fast we could try and politely ask whoever posted them and the article to take it down? Or make up some legal shit?” She sounds hopeful as her gaze flicks between the two of them. James’ face falls into a frown.
“How–,” Sirius clears his throat, “How many people have seen the post?”
Dorcas reloads the page, “Me and one other person,” She looks up. Sirius’ eyes widen as James meets them.
“Email the journalist writer person!” Marlene calls out from across the room, her voice practically radiating optimism. Sirius springs into action, whipping out his own phone from absolutely nowhere and logging into his official work email account. Mary gets up to stand behind Sirius as he types out a message, followed by Remus, Marlene and Lily. This could work, James thinks, this could actually work. He watches as the rest of them crowd around Sirius’ phone, instructing him and talking over each other on what to say. Sirius makes the executive decision to offer a fairly large sum of his own money to the journalist too as a precautionary in the case that his well-written, by Mary, mostly, sob story doesn't work. After about thirty seconds, Remus must decide he’s had enough as he stands back, arms folded as he looks over at James and sends him a small smile.
This could actually work.