that feeling like you’re not really in your body invades james’ mind like a parasite.
he wants nothing more than to stop feeling it. he stares in the mirror numbly, he can’t feel the carpet underneath his feet.
or hear the knocks that are echoing through his room from his bedroom door.
james is so fucking focused on his body, he can’t hear regulus gasp from behind him.
he’s naked, well not naked, just shirtless in his boxers, and pinpointing how much his bones stick out of his grossly pale skin.
he jumps a bit when a jacket is suddenly covering his shoulders. the quiet coos of his mother are heard from behind him.
james can feel himself being guided towards his bed, tucked in like he was a child.
all he can do is accept it.
accept the warmth of his mum’s embrace.
when he goes to apologise he’s interrupted, “go to sleep, love.”
he wishes he could say something but all that comes out is a weak whimper. he’s exhausted, physically & mentally.
all while this is happening, regulus stays frozen at the door.
regulus knows he’s a coward. but at least he had enough power to call effie.
james is in safe hands, he can leave.
but he doesn’t, he stands still, watching quietly.
like he does best.