Neglect

Alone she was now much more frequent than ever before. And she liked it – it was refreshing. Much more refreshing than being in her father’s company. 

She felt free like she had the whole house to herself. In that time, she managed to learn ‘Alohomora’ from one of the books in Severus’s library and get into a room, which was locked. Inside she had found a piano and a bunch of stuff relating to her mother. 

Slowly she explored it all, bit by bit. But what was most interesting to her, was the piano. There were many books around it, and once she opened them, she found notes. Heaps of them. And some music theory ones too. 

So, she learnt and learnt and managed to fit all of the theory into her small head, consumed by all the knowledge she was receiving. And she managed to learn something. By spending all her time on it, she learnt Beethoven’s “Ode to Joy”. 

She wasn’t sure what exactly from it she had learnt, as it was just a small piece from it. She had found a notebook of Beethoven’s symphonies, but the rest had been too light to make out and all the other symphonies had been too hard, so she settled on it. 

She often awoke sleeping over the piano, her body frozen with fear, listening if her father had come home, but the times she fell asleep there, he had been gone. 

She kept the room her little secret, not even straying near it when her father was home. The room itself was at the end of the hall, on the second floor, opposite her room. But either way, her father had suspected nothing. 

But as much as the room with its piano and secrets intrigued her, much more intriguing were her father’s bookshelves. Yes, she had snooped in them, but she only went through an old copy of “ Basic spells every wizard needs to know (and if they don’t, they are as bad as squibs or muggle-borns)”, which she had learnt ‘Alohomora’ from.  

And yes, that was the title of the books. “Someone’s lacking in spells, if he needs this book.”  Madeline chuckled to herself.  

She decided she would indeed start with this book and all the knowledge it held. If one wouldn’t know, they’d describe her addiction to knowledge as some sort of drug addiction. 

But being deprived of it and not allowed to do anything a normal kid was allowed; she simply couldn’t help herself.  

Flipping the book open, she landed on its continents: Part 1 – the basics. 

“Well, that should be easy.” She thought, looking through the rest of the contents. “Only if I was actually in Hogwarts.” She added. 

In total, there were ten spells listed as the basics. From those spells were the following – Accio, Alohomora, Expelliarmus, Expecto Patronum, Lumos, Nox, Wingardium Leviosa, Stupefy, Protego and Incendio. 

“Very smart this book is. The basics and then they put a spell like Expecto Patronum. Who am I? Dumbledore? So, these were the basics?” She scrutinised the book but decided that from it she’d try to learn the easier spells – Accio, Lumos, Nox and Wingardium Leviosa.  

Alohomora, she had learnt so she thought these she could manage. She started with Accio. 

“The Summoning Charm,” She said out loud, reading off the text on the page, “also known as Accio has been dis- this is not interesting.” She skimmed over to the practical stuff. Accio (pronounced ah-kee-oh), had a very easy wand movement. A frown type of line, which in the book was described as a ‘downturned smile line’. 

“Well, that certainly seems like dad’s smile.”  She chuckled. She practised the movement with her wand and if you are wondering where a nine-year-old managed to find a wand, well listen up. Or, well - read up? 

While venturing through her father’s office for the first time, in a well-hidden box with a dust pile on top, she found many belongings of her former mother. Inside she found, what she supposed, was her mother’s wand.  

And now she is using the same wand to learn her spells. Did she know that the wand chooses the wizard and that she was not supposed to handle a different wand that easily? Maybe, but she didn’t really care. 

After a couple of hours of perfecting everything and spraining her back over her father’s cold office floor, she managed the spell. 

“Accio feather.” She spoke, her voice a more secretive tone as she cast the spell. Interesting, what secrets can a child have? 

As she cast the spell, her wanted feather, which her father had last used probably a lifetime ago, flew into her hands. She smiled and tried again, this time with a book. It worked. 

“Can I not say the thing and just say Accio?” She wondered, examining the wand. She outstretched her arm and cast the spell, her gaze and mind set on a piece of chalk left on her father’s window sill.  

And to her surprise, it worked! But glancing at the clock, she decided the magic should stop and she should go to bed. She set the books, the feather and the chalk right back into their places. She was good at this. Setting things back in their exact place. Maybe with a millimetre of inaccuracy, but accurate enough for father to not notice. 

But, as she left his office, she heard the front door opening. Panicked she ran to her room, thanking everyone she knew that her room was nowhere near the stairs. She closed the door as quietly as she could and scrapping the idea of her pyjamas, she hid the wand in her drawer of socks and got under the covers. She closed her eyes and tried to calm her breathing.  

But just as she had managed to do that, Severus stormed into her room and pulled her off her supposed slumber, by pulling her hair and asking. “What the hell were you doing in the bathroom?” “He thinks I was in the bathroom, good.” She mentally sighed in relief.  

Opening her eyes, she momentarily got scared seeing her father’s angry glare right in her face. “I was just going to the bathroom. I needed to pee.” She replied, trying to sound as convincing as she could. 

“In your day clothes?” He asked, his grip on her hair tightening. “I should’ve attempted to put my pyjamas on!” “Well, uh, I was too tired to change and figured I could go to sleep like this.” She hoped he would believe her lie. But he didn’t. 

Throwing her back on her bed, he snarled. “Lier.” She was thankful that her bed was soft. He stormed out of her room and headed into the bathroom. Soon he came back, his face looking even uglier when it was rimming with red. 

“What. Did. You. Do?” He practically spit in her face. “Nothing, I was telling the truth.” She replied, shrinking in her bed.  

He didn’t buy it the second time, but this time his hands reached for his belt, looped in his pants. Slowly taking it out, he repeated the question in a tone she feared. “What did you do?”  

And before she was able to reply the same thing as many times before, his belt landed on her stomach and she cried out in pain. 

Soon the house was filled with cries of a child, crying out “Nothing! I did nothing! Please!”, and an angry father yelling nonsense. 

Only when he noticed blood seeping from a scratch on her side, he stopped and just left. He had hit her side with the metal part, scratching the skin. 

She writhed in her bed, trying to keep her cries in and wanting to get rid of the pain. Eventually, she passed out from the effort. 

In the morning, she limped into the bathroom and attempted to treat her sore body. While treating she had noticed how bony her skin was and remembered that the day before she had not eaten anything, apart from a cooked egg for breakfast, too engrossed in everything else.  

But did this stop her from learning spells and piano? No. Now she was more clever with it. One day she would practise piano and only until five in the evening. The other day were spells. And again, until five in the evening. 

Severus on the other hand was proud of his supposed parenting and that whenever he unexpectedly came home from work, his daughter was in her room reading or drawing.  

The occasional slaps or hits did come for speaking inappropriately to her father or being a klutz, but he had also started spending even less time at home than before.  

And now being more careful she managed to work out a somewhat of a schedule in her head. She learned another song, whose name she couldn’t even read because of how much sun damage the page had gotten. Well nonetheless, she managed to learn her desired spells – Lumos, Nox and Wingardum Leviosa. 

Truly, what an obedient child did Severus have.