My Solace has feathered wings
Chapter 6: My Solace has feathered wings
Harry is laying on his back staring up at the ceiling of his bedroom above the leaky cauldron; after the trip to Gringotts and everything that Griphook had told him, Harry had come back to the pub and asked the barman Tom for a room. He had been shut in said room for the past two days.
He could not face the outside world at the moment, it was all too much. For all his life he had been nothing more than the Dursleys servant, the freak they were forced to take under their roof, his bedroom was a cupboard, he had no friends. He was an orphan; he was an underfed eleven-year-old who wore Dudley’s too-big-hand-me-down-clothes.
Up until last week he had known nothing about magic or his ability to speak to snakes, he hadn’t known what his parents looked like, he hadn’t even known his dads name or his own surname.
But then he found Selena, and Selena showed him magic, and told him about Hogwarts, Selena was now his friend, his familiar.
Then he had a dream (vision/memory?) about his mum, and he saw what she looked like for the first time, heard her voice, and learned the truth about how she had died. Not in a car crash but instead murdered by a maniac with magic.
Then the whole letter incident, and he learned how to use his magic to heal himself. And then Hagrid and learning his dad's name. Then he an eleven-year-old boy left the Dursleys for the year and went into Wixen London alone. Then he finds out he’s super rich, also he finds out what his dad looks like and that Harry looks just like him.
And after all that - he finds out that he is the apparent saviour of the Wixen world, that he is ‘the boy who lived’ and that he somehow managed to kill of a dark lord at the ripe age of one. And worst of all the entire Wixen world knows his name and the scar on his forehead.
What is Harry supposed to do with all that? He really doesn’t know.
He’s also feeling true grief for the first time, he never really had a reason to grieve is parents before he didn’t remember them, he didn’t know what they looked like, really to him they were just and idea.
But now… now he knows what they looked like, he knows that his father wore glasses just like Harry and that he had a smile that could outshine the sun. He knows that his mother was brave beyond measure, and that she has the same bright green eyes as him.
He knows his mother loved him enough to die for him, and he thinks his father must have loved him too, he doesn’t think his mother would have married a man who wasn’t as brave and smart and loving as she must have been. They are not just an idea anymore they were people, real living people who loved him and wanted him, and harry feels the grief for what he has lost like a weight on his heart.
It hurts so so much that he will never meet them, that he will never get to ask them questions, that they will never know him and that he will never know them.
So, he lays on his bed trying to process everything trying to breathe when he doesn’t really want to, trying to get the strength to move out of his bed.
“Star, tell me what’s wrong.” Selena asks softly, her black and green eyes looking sadly down at him.
The words tumble from his lips before he can stop himself. “I... Selena, they are dead my parents are dead.” Then Harry breaks down into tears, he has kept it in for the past two days just stewing in his own grief sadness and fear. Selena gave him space and didn’t ask him why he was upset up until now.
Harry sobs, he sobs for what feels like hours, but was probably only a few minutes. He cries until the tears won’t fall anymore; he lets Selena hiss comforting words in his ear from where she sits coiled up on his pillow. He lets himself break to pieces, until he is nothing more than broken glass scattered on the bed sheets.
“Star, I am here, just breathe, you're ok, you will be ok my speaker.”
Harry takes a shuddering inhale; he breathes in and out. In and out. In and out. He is still full of grief and sadness (He doesn’t think that the feeling will ever truly leave) but he feels a little bit better now that he let himself cry.
“I’m sorry Selena I’m just… sad, that they’re not here. I have to do this whole thing alone, and it’s just so…much.” Harry sniffles and wipes his tears off with his sleeve.
“Do not be sorry for your sadness, all of this is too much for a hatchling. I am sorry your parents are gone - you have a right to grieve them, but you will not do this alone, because I am here, you are my speaker and I am your serpent. I have venom and I will protect you, I have knowledge I will guide you. I promise Star.” She tells him with far more kindness than a broken child like him deserves.
Harry looks at Selena with a softness he didn’t know he had; he does not know what would have happened to him without this brilliant snake... but he is very glad he never had to find out. “I will protect you too, I promise.”
“I know you will, Star. Now you must get up and eat, and then we will go and buy your school things.”
Her tone is not the type you could ever hope to argue with, she’ll probably try and bite him or something if he even thinks about staying in this room for any longer. So, he decides its best to just agree, “Ok, Selena.”
~~~
An hour later and Harry is walking down Diagon alley towards the book shop. He showered and ate breakfast, and now he is going to buy his school books.
He is almost at the book shop when another shop catches his eye, the sign on the front of the building reads: Eyelops animal emporium
Harry wonders if they have anything for snakes - he was thinking it would be good to get some sort of heat lamp for Selena so she can stay warm. “Selena, shall we go into the pet shop? They might have a heat lamp for you.”
“Yes, Star I am cold. You shall buy me warmth.” She says with a finality he can’t deny.
They open the door to the emporium, the bell rings as they step over the threshold. Harry looks around; all along the ceiling there are lots of cages with loads of different owls in all types of colours and sizes. There are rickety shelves along the back of the shop with an array of different items all for animals, and a counter with bottles of different medicines all along the wall behind it.
“Hello, how may I help you today young man.” Asks the woman who is standing behind the counter.
“Oh, hello. I was looking for something to keep my snake familiar warm.” He tells her trying to smile but it probably looked more like a grimace.
“Let me see what we have.” The lady says and bustles of to look in the back of the shop.
As Harry is waiting, he looks around at the owls. “Selena, should I get an owl? You know, to send messages and stuff?” Not that he really has anyone to send messages too, but it could still be useful.
Selena hisses in annoyance, “I do not like birds. But…yes Star, you should have a messenger bird.”
Harry chuckles a bit at Selena’s hatred of birds. “Don’t worry Selena, I won’t let it eat you.”
“No bird can eat me; I have deadly venom I would bite it.” She tells him with an offended hiss.
Harry rolls his eyes fondly at Selena’s antics, before shifting his focus to the cages above his head that hang from the ceiling, attempting to find one he likes, but none of them seem to catch his eye. Suddenly he feels a flurry of wings zip past his head and a small raven lands on the counter in front of him.
It stares at him and tilts its head to the side, that’s when Harry notices one of its eyes are a milky white, while the other is completely black. The bird hops closer to him on the counter, so Harry reaches out a finger to stroke its head and the strange little bird lets him.
“Hello.” Harry says to the bird. It chirps back at him and then to Harry’s astonishment flies up into the air and lands on his shoulder. It pecks his ear and then stares around the shop from its new perch.
Harry stands very still not wanting to scare the little bird off his shoulder, and he wonders to himself how he keeps finding magical animals.
The shop keeper returns holding a few items, that must be heat sources for Selena. And almost drops them in surprise when she sees the bird on his shoulder. “That little rascal escaped again, did he?” She says in exasperation
“I guess so.” Harry smiles. “Is he for sale?”
“Err, he is but no one really wants him because he’s half blind, you see his white eye he can’t see out of it.”
“Can he carry letters and packages?”
“Yes, he can, he’s a magical raven so he can carry things a lot heavier than himself, do you…want to buy him?” She asks hesitantly.
“I was going to buy an owl, but I can hardly leave him behind so…yes. I will buy him.” He smiles again, feeling set on his decision.
“Oh lovely! I’m glad he’s finally going to a good home, He’s been here for almost a year, although I will warn you, he’s a right little rascal, he somehow manages to unlock his cage every time I put him in it.” She says happily as she sets the items she retrieved from the store room down on the counter.
Harry turns his head to look at the raven. “That’s ok, no one likes to be caged. Do I need to buy anything for him?”
“Well, you could get him some treats and a travel cage. Possibly a perch of some kind?” She suggests.
“Could I get the treats and the perch but not the cage? And if it's possible, could you send the things to room number 10 above the leaky cauldron?” Harry asks politely (He noticed a leaflet on the window that said they do deliveries).
“Yes of course.” She says jovially and starts pushing buttons on the till. “I’ll send them up later, and did you still want to buy a heat source for the snake?”
“Yes, please.”
~~~
Harry leaves the shop a few minutes later with a wrist cuff that has an eternal warming charm embedded in the mettle so Selena can wrap around his wrist and stay warm when they are out and about, and he also got her a stationary heat lamp for when they are back in the room above the leaky cauldron. And he has a magical raven on his shoulder, because why not?
The raven does not fly away the second they leave the shop as Harry was worried it might, instead it chirps happily on his shoulder seemingly overjoyed with being out of the pet shop and having Harry as its owner.
They make their way into a book shop called Flourish and Blots. Harry looks around in awe, this shop is much bigger than the animal emporium it looks small from the outside but once you walk in its so much bigger. There are about fifteen different aisles all made of book shelves. Harry pulls out his booklist that he got in his Hogwarts letter, and sets out along the aisle picking up books that look interesting along with the ones on his list.
“Star, it is good for you to read and have knowledge, but not if the books crush you and your familiars.” She scolds him, as Harry’s tower of books almost topple out of his arms and onto his head.
“Ok, ok, sorry Selena, we can go and pay for these and then we can go back to the room. Yes?” He says apologetically.
“Yes.” Selena agrees grumpily.
He goes to the counter to pay for the books, the cashier uses magic to levitate the books out of Harry’s arms and onto the counter.
“Thankyou.” Harry says gratefully to the man.
“No problem. Do you want these sent somewhere or are you taking them yourself?”
“If you don’t mind, can you send them too room number 10 above the leaky cauldron?”
“Yes of course.” The man smiles at him (Why are the shopkeepers all so nice? Its honestly, weird).
Harry pays for the books and heads back to his room.
~~~
Finally, he’s back in the room. Selena is coiled up under her new heat lamp, and the raven that he hasn’t named yet, is alternating between flying around the room and sitting in his hair.
The books he bought have arrived also, and he is reading his potions textbook. He has decided to study as much as possible for the next month so that he is not behind on anything once he reaches Hogwarts. He will start with his school books then work his way through the other books he bought in flourish and blots, he refuses to be laughed at by the other school kids for not knowing things.
His day started terribly; he was practically drowning in sadness this morning. But now he’s lying on his bed with his new books and raven familiar, he managed to find solace even though he didn’t think that was possible this morning. That’s when he gets the idea for the raven's name.
“Solace. Your name is Solace.”