Astronomy Towers are great places to get sassed by Regulus Black
“Ok, happy now? I hate everyone in this world but Barty, Regulus, and Dorcas.” Evan sighed as his friends all suppressed more laughter.
“Oh, so now you hate your own twin?” Barty teased his boyfriend with a grin.
“Oh, I am sooo not getting that piercing now.” Barty pouted and Evan sighed, again. “I’m only joking.”
“So, you hate everyone except me, Regulus, Dorcas and Pandora.” Barty grinned and pulled his boyfriend closer to kiss him sloppily but lovingly.
“Gross, save that shit for bedroom boys.” Dorcas joked.
“Ew, no, I share it with them.” Chimed in Regulus, crinkling his nose. It was true. In their dorm it was Regulus and the horndog duo that was Barty and Evan. The worst night by far had been a little after they started dating and they snuck in a Gryfinndor. Regulus never did see who it was his best friends had shared the night with but he was pretty sure Peter Pettigrew, gossip monger that could rival Rita Skeeter he was, was hobbling the next couple days.
“Are we heading to breakfast?” Pandora asked as she entered the Slytherin commons. Unlike the first time she had popped in, in first year, not many Slytherins looked surprised at the Ravenclaw in their commons. Only one or two first years looked confused but they knew better than to comment. Everyone in Slytherin house, including the 7th years were under hex threat from the Skittles if they commented on Pandora’s appearance.
The Ravenclaw Rosier hugged Regulus from behind. She was the only one who could get away with it, unless he was having a panic attack. Regulus was made of anxiety and got them frequently. He had at least two of the Skittles in each class, all of which were trained on how to deal with each respective group member’s issues.
They were trained to ask quietly to leave class and take him to the ROR (which they found in their first year, thank you very much) to decompress from either the panic attack he was having or his overstimulation. That was for Regulus. With Barty, they also subtly took him out of class but they instead took him to the forbidden forest until his meltdown or mania settled some. Barty got panic attacks too, but they were rarer. Evan’s procedure was the same as Regulus’s and Pandora’s was a lot like Barty’s, just for different things. Dorcas had the unique procedure, because her whole routine was snatching Marlene and sending her to the ROR where Dorcas would usually be waiting. It worked really well.
“So, breakfast?” Pandora asked again as Regulus snapped back into reality.
“Yeah, let’s go.” Evan said, agreeing with his twin.
“Come on everybody.” Dorcas corralled their little group to head out of the dungeons and upstairs.
“Coming.” Regulus said, bringing up the back.
“That's what he said.” Barty chimed in.
“No, that’s what you said last night.” Evan grinned and picked up his bottom with ease. He threw Barty over his shoulder and began walking. This was a common occurrence with the two of them so they all just continued walking. When they entered the Great Hall, Evan put Barty back down and they all sat.
Across the room, the Gryfinndors began chanting, probably in response to their game against Hufflepuff in the next week or so. Regulus never paid close attention to the team as a whole. Really just the one player, with his pretty honey-brown eyes and his perfect pink lips, and his sultry hips and his teeny tiny height with his larger-than-life personality and his cur….. Fuck! Regulus cursed mentally. Stupid Potter and his stupid fucking gorgeous existence.
Perfect little spare, perfect little heir, perfect Reggie, Mother and Father’s favourite. Like any member of the Black family, Sirius’s words were weapons and they stabbed like knives into Regulus’s psyche. He pushed down the rising black in his lungs with another deep breath and put his croissant in a napkin. After stretching and standing he moved to get away before the day really started.
“Where you going, stringbean?” Barty called up to Regulus as he turned.
“Just for some air before classes.” Regulus sighed and left.
When he entered the Astronomy tower to sit on the ledge he noticed a shade in his spot. The shade in question was James Potter. Regulus seriously contemplated running the other way when he realised this, but fuck that, Blacks only run when they can’t call the Imperius curse. Plus, James was good eye candy and he wanted to ask him about that day in the bathroom.
“You’re in my spot.” The sharp, distinctly French voice of Regulus Black rang through the tower and startled James.
“Oh, sorry, I didn’t realise.” James stood and shuffled to a different spot on the ledge awkwardly.
“Don’t do it again.” He replied in a cold voice although on the inside he was having a meltdown over this little twink obeying so easily.
“Um, I can go, if you don’t want me here.” The smaller boy shifted on his feet, recognising the ice in Regulus’s tone as the ‘leave me alone’ voice.
“Sit, Potter.”
“O-ok.”
He sat.
“Why were you panicking the other day?” Regulus broke the extended silence with a question about the last time they had seen each other.
“Why were you under an invisibility potion?” James, ever the deflector, asked instead of answering.
“That’s not an answer.”
“Neither’s that.”
“I asked first. Now, answer me, Potter.”
“I was slightly stressed. Happy now, Black?”
“Slight stress only sends the chronically anxious into full on panic attacks that last half an hour.”
“That’s not even a little true. Anyone can have a giant panic attack for no reason.”
“But they don’t. Why are you so intent on not answering me?”
“I-” The bell interrupted James and he stood. “Um, I’ll see you around?”
“I’ll see you.”
Almost a month passed before James braved another visit to the Astronomy tower. It was late at night, almost 3am. He climbed the steps quietly and his sleep-deprived brain didn’t process the tall, quiet figure of Regulus Black sitting on the ledge. He walked over and plopped down, resting his head on his hands and gazing down at the expanse of land below him.
For a long time, James had been wondering what it’d be like to fall from that ledge. Would it hurt when he eventually splattered on the lawn? Would he be scared as he fell? Would he finally feel free? Unbound? Would he finally shake the ties of a mortal life he wasn’t truly sure he wanted? He dipped forward dangerously and a long elegant arm shot in front of him.
“Are you trying to fall, Potter?” The voice came from the owner of the arm, the elegant Regulus Black.
“Does it matter?” James wasn’t usually snarky but he knew his period was close to starting and he didn’t really feel like clipping the angst from his body.
“Aren’t you supposed to be the sunshine guy?” Regulus replied, unfazed in tone by James’ casual response but deeply unsettled on the inside.
“Even the sun goes down every night.”
“That’s quite a pessimistic view, Potter. I didn’t peg you the sardonic type.”
“Guess I’m just full of surprises, aren’t I?”
“Careful. I might have to tell your cronies you’re secretly suicidal.”
“They wouldn’t believe you if you tried. Golden boy’s too perfect to be depressed and all that crap.”
“Do you seriously believe they wouldn’t care?”
“No one ever truly does, right?”
“I’d like to think some do.”
“That’s a hell of a lot more positive than I’d expect from you, Regulus.”
“Guess I’m full of surprises too, aren’t I?”
“Does that snark ever get you laid?”
“Why would you care? Besides, I don’t see you much talking to any girls whatsoever. Are they put off by the fact that you barely break the five foot barrier?”
“That was a low blow.”
“Any comment that isn’t polite is a low blow when the person it’s directed at is like 5’1.”
“This is coming from a guy who’s like 6’3. Everyone is short to you.”
“Yeah, but you in particular are quite short.”
“Fuck you, Regulus.”
“Whoa, guess it’s someone’s time of the month.”
“What?” James paled. Regulus couldn’t have known that. Could he?
“Relax, Potter. It was a joke. Guys don’t get…” Regulus paused as gears turned in his mind. “But you do? Don’t you? That’s why you barely break the 5 foot barrier, why you disappear into the bathroom often every couple of weeks, why you eat more chocolate than Lupin once a month. You’re trans.” It wasn’t a question. It was a statement.