City of stars

chapter I. winter, another lovely night.

☆

Sirius wakes up to a puppy licking her face.

If padfoot can even be considered a puppy anymore. It’s early February now and it’s her last week of freedom before they start filming.

Padfoot is seven months old now and considerably bigger, and about to become even bigger. But he’s still a puppy at heart, with long legs and an overly enthusiastic affection which can make him a bit careless sometimes. Now, for instance, his paws are digging into Sirius’ ribs.

“Okay, buddy. Okay-okay, back off-” Sirius' voice only works to make Padfoot even happier now that she’s awake, his tail wagging like crazy and hitting the duvet in a rhythmic sound. “I love you too, but- Pad-Pafoot! Down boy.” Sirius tries more sternly, the dog finally backing off with a huff, resulting to give her to puppy eyes as his tail keeps wagging furiously.

She sits up and stretches, snatching the note resting on the pillow next to her that informs her of Finn’s whereabouts. He’s had some meetings with directors on potential collaboration and he should be back before noon to get ready for that party they have to go to. There’s breakfast in the dining room, he’s written.

“Let’s have breakfast and then we’ll go on a nice walk, yes?” She frames Padfoot's head, leaning in to place a kiss on top of his snout before getting out of bed, Padfoot following her by jumping around her legs in excitement of the words ‘breakfast’ and ‘walk’ .

She takes a quick shower before breakfast, eating quickly so she’d have enough time to go on a long walk with Padfoot before she was to be home to get ready for later.

Their neighbourhood is thankfully a quiet one, mostly family homes behind a street where local shops reside.

The sun has started to become more brash, leaving behind the mild winter they’ve had this year and preparing the world under it for spring. Sirius is the happiest when she walks Padfoot. She’s reminded, with each passing shop and the friendly greeting their owners give her, that she’s managed to build a life here within a few months.

They greet her by name and treat her as if she’s a child of theirs, or a friend. She loves the little antique shop, the coffee shop with the best danish pastry in the city and the record store with a huge selection of both old and repressed records. She loves their smiles, and how they always give her a piece of their life by telling her their news when she asks. It makes her feel settled, like she belongs.

It’s as if she never left.


☾

“I need you to take over the introduction tonight in case I’m late.”  Remus tells Dempsey as he reads over the bill sent from his wine supplier.

“Am I getting promoted?”

Remus spared him an unamused glance and deadpans “Yes.”

Dempsey laughs, shaking his head as he takes the signed papers to store them in the folder.

“How come?”

“I’m invited to this lunch-party-soiree thing. Edward will be there.”

“Edward?” Dempsey turns to him instantly.  “Edward Dugray the director?”

“Yeah.”

“Is this about his new movie?”

“I’m not sure yet. It might be.”

“Remus, this is incredible.” Dempsey said, genuine awe laced with his voice.

“We’ll see.” Remus said, stapling the last bills together and passing them to Dempsey before grabbing his jacket. “ Are we good for tonight?”

“Sure, are. Will keep you posted.” He confirms with a nod, putting his mind at ease for now.

“See you tonight.”

“Good luck.” Dempsey sings-songs as he reaches the exit, making him shake his head in good-natured exasperation.

Remus was lucky to have employees he got to call friends, sharing his passion and dedication to his art just the same. He was forever grateful to have found them, and the regulars that brought their enthusiasm and own adoration for jazz every night, making each performance a special one, welcoming each new composition with renewed fervour.

Moony’s was not only his pride and joy. It had become the place where his heart found solace and companionship, just as much as excitement and renaissance.

Remus had settled quite well into his dream, loving it more than he ever thought possible.

☆

The party is in full swing by the time they get there. She’s not sure it could be considered a party since it’s the afternoon, there’s mostly jazz playing instead of songs to dance to and there are drinks and finger food whose names she still can’t name.

It’s more like an event, although there’s nothing particular going on besides the same old networking within the industry.

They’re pulled in instantly, and Sirius is reminded of how much she doesn’t like these kinds of things. She never did, even when connecting with people within the industry was very much needed. But it’s okay. She can endure the occasional party and it never hurts to meet a new casting director face to face.

A kind man offers to take their coats and Finn places a hand on her waist to lead her deeper into the house where they’re greeted by Christropher, the host.

Christopher compliments Finn’s work as an assistant director and Sirius just smiles politely as she tries not to zone out on a conversation about the technicalities of the job, which she’s not really interested in.

She looks around, looking for any familiar face or the mini bar where she can grab drinks for the both of them when a few people in the far right corner move, leaving her with an unobstructed view that gives her a pause.


A few months back, after that night at Moony’s, Sirius had tossed and turned for days to come.

There wasn’t a particular thought keeping her up at night, just the general idea of it. Just seeing Remus again, beautiful as ever with an easy smile and place where his charismatic passion found ground to bewitch the audience who cared enough to listen into loving jazz, like it had happened with her. She keeps recalling their shared moment, the understanding behind it and everything left unsaid in favour of a bittersweet ending.

Finn had woken up one night, saw the worry in her eyes and asked her what she was thinking about. Sirius said it was nothing, gave him a reassuring kiss and they both went back to sleep.

Sirius had decided it was time to stop lingering on it.


But Remus is here now, nodding along, his face screwed up in concentration before he breaks into laughter, white collar open so the column of his neck is exposed to the warm lights of the vast living room. He starts speaking, gesturing intensely in that manner he does whenever he speaks about music, pathos emanating from him as the man’s expression showcase that he’s a rapt listener, fascinated by whatever Remus is talking about.

He’s in a white button-down and blue suit trousers, always true to himself even in a sea of well-dressed people in expensive designer suits.

Sirius finds herself about to break into a smile at the sight of Remus’ charm working. The man is now laughing and patting Remus on the back as he nods, telling him something that has Remus bowing his head and smiling bashfully, his hands finding their way into his pockets as he-

“Sirius?” Finn’s voice pulls her back to the little circle of people that has formed around them.

“Mhm?”

“We heard you’re about to start filming?” Christopher prods with a kind smile.

“Oh, yeah. Yes, I, uh…” She trails off, her eyes not helping but straying to the place where Remus stood a few seconds ago, only to find it empty. Oh, well. “I start filming next week actually. Warner Bros.” She smiles, watching as everyone’s attention is on her now.

“Any interesting insights on what we should be expecting?”

“Well,” Sirius begins, sparing one last glance at the still empty spot to make sure that Remus has disappeared  for now. “I can’t say much, but..” She continues, latching onto an entertaining description of the story she’s about to bring to life, practised enough to not to disclose any confidential information as she distracts herself from a presence that has her heartbeats spiking considerably.

☾

Remus doesn’t really enjoy these gatherings.

They remind him of the days when he used to play 80s pop songs in insubstantial brunch parties and frankly that’s a thing a man wishes to forget.

Today it’s fine, however. There’s no pool, no pop band and no audience requests. There are quite a few people he finds pretentious, but everyone including him is a bit pretentious at heart and there’s the added bonus of jazz playing, so he counts that as a win.

He found Edward as soon as he got there. The place wasn’t flooded with guests, so he was easy to spot, and even easier to approach since Edward saw him first and summoned him over.

Remus already had an idea of what might come from this ‘talk’ but it was still surprising and extremely flattering to be asked to compose the soundtrack for one of his movies in progress.

They had talked a bit, Edward explained the vision and the general feel of the movie and Remus gave some thoughts and ideas he had on what would suit the story. They agreed to meet again and he even invited Remus to the set so he can get a better feeling of the movie’s aesthetic in action.

It had been a while since they had reached the agreement, Edward complimenting Remus’ talent and drive profusely, making Remus feel more confident of agreeing to do this by the second. He thought he might leave earlier to get ready for tonight, but the other man insisted on Remus not leaving yet, joining him instead in a quick around the room since there were some people Remus ‘ had to meet ’.

Which is how he found himself stuck in a conversation with a man who was more interested in listening to himself rather than actually engaging himself in a dialogue with the people around him. Remus tried to conceal his sigh or increasing boredom by searching the room for a distraction. Perhaps he could say he needs to use the restroom, or maybe grab himself another drink.

It’s as Remus’ eyes roam the place for an escape that he sees it, the vision before him keeping him rooted to the spot.


Back in December, Remus wasn't able to walk past the landing at Moony’s without his mind wandering.

The landing seemed to be a place where a shrine should be placed, still holding an energy, Remus unable to shake the image of Sirius standing there each time he passed by. Sirius, in her beautiful dress, hair cascading down her shoulders as she gave him that sweet smile, the frown between her brows adding a hint of bitterness to their encounter, similar to their ending.

The billboard on the side road with her face had been taken down a few days later, replaced with a new one about a post-apocalyptic movie. Remus took that as a sign not to linger on it any longer.


But now she was standing there, leaning over the white-clothed table full of drinks, fingers tucking her curls behind her ear before those same fingers moved to her chin as she inspected the choices in front of her.

He couldn’t help his smile from spreading when he saw her reach for a champagne glass, like he’d anticipated she would, the familiarity of it all bringing a weight to his stomach.

“Remus, I would like you to meet the producer, Margot.”

Remus’ head snaps back to Edward, smiling while gesturing to the woman next to him, looking at him expectantly, a kind smile on her face.

“Oh, sorry-yes, hello. Remus Lupin.” He extends his hand in greeting, the producer shaking his hand as she introduces herself.

“Margot can fill you in about the production stages so you can get a better insight on the deadline we’re working on.” Edward suggested. Remus nods, his eyes casting a fleeting glance towards the mini bar, only to find that Sirius has moved.

“Yeah, sure. That’d be great.” He nods, trying to look eager and not at all distracted by grey eyes and maroon dress.

Remus throws one last searching look around the room. When he fails to find what he’s been looking for, he retreats back to listening to a long speech about timetables and screening processes as he tries to will his heart to slow down.


☆

Sirius hasn’t seen Finn in a while. He got whisked off soon after by the people he’s been in discussions with for a potential collaboration on a big project Sirius doesn’t know anything about. It’s supposed to be a surprise.

She had thankfully managed to find a few friends near the buffet to distract her and keep her company, catching up with them while she enjoyed what must’ve been an amuse bouche with salmon. Dorcas had a play in the works, a story that sounded incredibly touching and Sirius couldn't wait to see her immense talent bring it to life.

They kept reminiscing about their times living together, but soon the discussion was nearing unwanted territories of the past and Sirius excused herself under the pretence of having to use the restroom.

She took a few minutes to breathe and brace herself for another hour or two of interactions before it was an acceptable amount of time had passed so they could leave.

She exited the bathroom, peering around the deserted corridor curiously. There were quite a few posters on the wall that looked out of place in comparison to the marble floors, but upon further inspection she realises they’re movie posters.

They all have this retro feel to them, like Christopher’s movies do, and she recognises them as specially made artworks from scenes of his own movies. Sirius is so engrossed in looking at them, playing a game with herself to remember the title of each movie when she hears footsteps approaching from around the corner.

She really hopes it’s not Christopher or his husband because she really doesn’t want to be seen examining his house’s decorations, but her anxieties come to a rest when the figure appears in the corridor, walking towards where she’s standing.

It takes a few seconds for Remus to lift his eyes from the ground and notice her, but once they do he nearly stops in his tracks. But because he’s Remus, despite the shock he keeps walking, slowing down considerably as he comes to stand next to her, eyes bright and a hesitant smile on his face.

Sirius feels her lips stretch into an identical smile, something soft and quiet, careful between them.

There are a few seconds of silence where they both take each other in, cataloguing everything they’ve missed from up close.

His freckles are not as prominent since it’s still February, but his curls are the same as ever, only a few lighter strands here and there that are sure to start turning to grey in a few years. His soft smile is familiar, causing a burst of warmth spreading in Sirius’ chest, amber lazy eyes taking her in.

She sees his eyes roam all over her. From her hair which is longer now, her eyes, the rest of her face and down her neck. They even move down her waist for a second, taking in her long dress before they’re back on hers again.

Sirius feels elated. She’s about to break the spell, taking in a deep breath before she speaks but he beats her to it.

“I did see you in the movies.” Remus says, his voice quiet, just for her to listen.

And suddenly she’s five years back, standing in that veranda and nursing a soda as that obnoxious guy in an 80’s attire bickers with her under the Californian sun.

A chuckle escapes her, lips stretching around a grin and crinkles adorning her eyes.

“And you’re not in a pop band anymore.” Sirius gestures to his clothes, watching as Remus lets his smile dominate his face.

“Mhmm, right.”

“That’s progress.” Sirius comments, raising her eyebrows in approval.

“That’s huge progress if I’ve ever seen one.” He nods solemnly, unable to keep the teasing tone out of his voice.

Their chuckles die down, settling into something softer as they look at each other with something akin to affection. It feels like stumbling upon your favourite toy you had as a kid, familiar and giddy, not knowing what to do with it but wanting to keep it close to you. To stare at, turn around this side and that, checking if everything's the same as you remember it, if it holds all the dear memories you made with it.

Sirius feels her heart racing, feeling like she needs to say more, something, anything. The words all tangled up, but she swallows and licks her lips, willing her voice to carry when she’s interrupted once again.

“Sirius?” Dorcas’ voice breaks the spell, making Remus take a step back to the side, giving her a full view of Dorcas lingering at the end of the corridor. “Finn is looking for you.” She says, an apologetic edge to her smile and she looks between the two of them. “Hello Remus.”

Remus gives her a friendly hello and Sirius nods her ‘ Thanks ’, giving Dorcas a reassuring smile before turning to look at Remus. “I have to..” She points lamely to the direction of the living room.

Remus smiles, nods in understanding as his hands find their way into his trousers’ pockets before he speaks. “Of course.”

He moves to the side, making more room for her to walk by him. Sirius does, something like regret growing inside her at the interruption.

She has to reach the end of the corridor to convince herself to turn around, seeing Remus standing right where she left him, the soft smile still in place.

Sirius grins, and then turns to enter the area of the living room.



☾

The time is nearing 7:00p.m and Remus decides it’s a good time to make his exit.
He has enough time to get to the bar before the programme is in full swing, and he’s pretty sure the traffic won’t be too bad on a Thursday night.

He finds Edward easily, hanging by the mini bar with Christopher, the host, and thanks them both for having him before telling them that he needs to be on his way.

“That’s how you run a business. Always tactical!” Christopher jokes, and Remus laughs. He doesn’t find the joke very entertaining, but he needs to be polite so he wishes them a good night before he starts making his way to the front door.

He lingers near the entrance for a second, something holding him back from leaving altogether without one last attempt to catch Sirius. He feels a strange pull and turns back around, his eyes falling on her instantly at the other side of the room, like they did back in December in a similarly dim-lighted room.

She’s already looking at him as she stands amongst a small group of people, Dorcas is with her, talking animatedly to a man who Remus thinks might be a theatre coordinator. He guesses the man next to her must be the one who had been looking for her, Finn, and judging by the way he has one arm wrapped around her waist he must be her partner. A lucky man, then.

Sirius smiles at him, something kind as she tilts her head. It all feels like deja vu, only the heavy implications are missing, and so is the nostalgia. Unlike last time, this doesn’t feel like a goodbye, but merely a promise of ‘I will see you later’, and the inevitability that comes with it.

Remus has zero complaints as he smiles back, bowing his head in a farewell and watching as Sirius’ smile widens in delight before she bites her lips to conceal it as she turns back to her group of friends.

One of the catering’s waiters opens the door for him, and he throws a quick ‘ Thank you ’ before he’s out into the night.

☆

Sirius unlocks the door before Padfoot comes running to her and in an instant she’s on her knees in the doorway, petting the dog as he attacks her with affection. “Come on, let’s take you out.”

Finn chuckles but hangs back in the doorway, closing the door and taking off his shoes as Sirius opens the French doors near the living room, allowing Padfoot to run out into the small garden.

She watches to make sure the dog is running around taking in scents of flowers before she walks back to the doorway to remove her own jacket and take off her shoes.

“Should we order chinese tonight?” Sirius asks distractedly, bending down to unlace the straps on her shoes. She stands back up to go call Padfoot in before Finn takes a hold of her arm.

“Let’s take a seat first.” He tilts his head in the direction of the living room, moving to take a seat on the armchair next to the mantelpiece.

“Padfoot-”

“Let him be for a while. Here, come sit.” He points to the sofa opposite him, and it's with a questioning smile that Sirius takes a seat, wondering where all the secrecy has come from.

“They offered me the job.”

Sirius eyes widen and she breaks into a smile. “Finn.”

“It’s a TV series scheduled for at least three seasons. I think it’s already in discussions to stream on a platform as well.” He explains, a smile on his face that lacks the enthusiasm Sirius thought there would be.

“That’s-wow, that’s-that’s good. That’s an amazing opportunity.” Sirius beams, genuinely happy for him. He’d mostly worked on independent films in France and a few more back in New York but nothing as big as this. This might even be his big break.

“If I take the job-”

“If?”

“It’s in London.” He says and it takes a second to register. When it does, the hints of sadness in his smile become evident, making Sirius’ own smile diminish.

“London.” She repeats.

“If I take the job-”

“You will take the job. Of course you will, it’s a wonderful thing-”

“I will have to move.” He interrupts, letting the silence stretch for a bit so his words can sink in. “They start filming in a month and… it will take at least four years before we wrap it up. And that’s only if the project doesn’t take another extension.”

Sirius’s expression sets in a deep brown of confusion as she watches him lean forward, elbows resting on his knees as he carefully gauges her reaction.

“I start filming next week.” Sirius says, trying to understand where this is going.

“I know.” Finn says.

“I can’t.. I’ll be filming for the next 8 months, we just settled- I can’t move.”

“I know.” He repeats, watching her carefully before he takes a deep breath and moves back to rest on the chair’s pillows. “I would never ask you to move. But you could.”

It takes a minute for Sirius to understand what he’s saying but once it registers, she protests immediately. “I can’t do that.”

“Sirius-”

“I’m not asking you to stay. No, there’s no way.” She shakes her head decidedly. “You have to go.”

Finn sighs and runs a hand through his hair in frustration, closing his eyes for a bit before he opens them again, looking directly into his eyes as he says; “I know.”

Sirius finds herself once again in a situation where there is nothing either of them can do, only this time it feels so freeing to be able to push Finn into what she knows it’s right. She supposes that feeling comes with the experience of having to navigate your life while dealing with a great heartbreak.

Finn suddenly gets up and walks around the table before taking the seat next to her on the sofa, Sirius turning to face him.

“This is amazing.” Sirius says again, just to remind him of how important this decision is. This is about his dream, who he always wanted to be before he even fell in love, so it has to prevail over anything else.

They look at each other, Sirius in a silent attempt to persuade him to make the right choice, and Finn with a pondering look.

At last, and with a deep breath he speaks. “I will go to London.”

Sirius smiles, trying to ignore the unshed tears welling up in her eyes and nods encouragingly.

“It was slowly going out anyways, don’t you think?” He acknowledges with a sad smile that holds no malice, just acceptance and maybe hints of regret. Sirius lets out a teary chuckle at that, sniffing her tears away.

She looks at him, really looks, and sees a kind, handsome man who has been nothing but supportive to her every move. Who has been amazing, through and through, and has the bravery to acknowledge that the nature of their companionship has shifted into something else, melting into a love that feels more platonic than anything else.

“Thank you.” Sirius whispers between them, in hopes he understands everything she’s trying to communicate with these two short words. She’s reassured he does when he smiles, reaching for her and pulling her into a gentle hug.

Sirius sniffs again as a few tears escape, overwhelmed by the grace and civility with which their situation is being handled by the both of them.

Finn pulls back a bit, allowing Sirius to lift her hands and wipe away the tears that have managed to roll down her cheeks.

“Who knows, maybe I’ll find my way on the big screen as well, one day.” Finn attempts at a joke, using his pointer finger to bop on Sirius’ nose, making her let out a genuine laugh.

“You don’t belong in front of a camera.” Sirius shakes her head as she takes a deep breath to shake the remnants of a cry away, feeling calmer by the second. It’s then that paws can be heard against the hardwood floor and Padfoot comes running towards them, pushing his head against Sirius’ legs as her hands find their way into soft fur.

“Did I make your parent cry? Huh, buddy?” Finn says, making Padfoot turn to him for a few pets before he decides he’s had enough and he comes pushing against Sirius’ legs once again.

“Who gets Padfoot?” Sirius asks, although they both know the answer to that already.

Finn lets out a loud laugh then, no doubt at how ridiculous the question is. The answer is obvious. “As if he could do without you. He’s too needy.”

“Yeah, no- you’re not taking Padfoot.” She grins, leaning over to place a kiss on top of Padfoot’s head as her hands massage his ears.

There are a few minutes of silence where they let everything sink in, before Finn gets up, extending an arm towards Sirius to pull her up.

“Shall we?”

“Yeah. Let’s go to sleep.” Sirius says. Something passes between them as they both smile, leaning in to meet each other in a chaste kiss, a comforting closure to their relationship.

Then, they get ready for bed.



chapter II. spring, back to Casablanca.

☆

March was in full swing and nearing April. The sun hesitated more and more in the late afternoon, giving the sky a beautiful palette of pink and purple colours to work with.

Finn had left about a week and a half after the party and it was with a teary goodbye at the airport that Sirius knew they were doing the right thing.

She had now been filming for a bit over a month and to say she had missed it would be an understatement. She was having the time of her life between preparing for the scenes, actually shooting them, and getting dinner with her co-stars.

Most days she wouldn’t have to be at the set until late morning which gave her enough time for a good breakfast and a long walk with Padfoot. Some days she’d take him with her, Padfoot being nothing but glad to be showered with affection whenever the crew and the rest of the cast noticed their arrival. Some other days, the busier ones, Sirius would leave him home and have Hermione pass by after school to let him out in the garden to get some air and run around a bit.

That was today.

It was just her, walking to the little coffee shop that held a special place in her heart and taking a deep breath, allowing the scent of freshly bloomed orange poppies to bring a smile to her face.

Like always, she refused the manager’s offer of a treat with a smile, tipping generously and wishing the cashier a good day.

Sirius walked out the cafe, no cart waiting for her this time, opting to walk the small distance to the set in favour of enjoying the spring efflorescence in the air when a smooth voice stopped her in her tracks.

“It’s pretty strange that we keep running into each other.” She turned around to find Remus sitting on a small round table, sunglasses on and curls glistening under the sun along with the skin on his neck, the collar of his blue button down open to expose his clavicle. He was resting back on his chair in relaxation, legs crossed over one another as he drank his coffee, an open book placed on the marble surface of the table. There was a smile on his lips, the epitome of warmth under the sun, bathed in amber hues and fresh air.

Sirius found that she didn’t want to stop her grin from showing, a flutter in her chest as she thought of how the warm sun is sure to have brought out the freckles adorning his nose.

“Maybe it means something.” Sirius tilted her head, pretend-contemplation laced with her voice as she kept on their little game of memories.

“Mmm,” He murmured, taking a sip of espresso before placing the cup back on the table “I doubt it.”

“Yeah. I don’t think so either.”  Sirius nodded with a teasing grimace, watching as Remus matched her grin.

“Have some time to spare?” He asked, gesturing to the empty seat across from him.
Sirius glanced at her watch, buzzing at the prospect of spending half an hour in Remus’ company.

“I do, actually. Yeah.” She says, taking a seat on the opposite side of the table. “So, did you break in again? Should we expect the guards to come for you?” She teased, letting her bag down on her feet and getting comfortable under his gaze.

Remus chuckled at that, shaking his head in exasperation. “Any minute now.”

Sirius snorted at the easy banter, before Remus spoke again. “I had a meeting actually. For real this time.”

“Oh?” Sirius asks curiously.

“It’s still in the works, but I’m composing something.” He explains, and Sirius tilts her head in a silent question. “For a movie.”

Sirius frowns a bit, taken aback at the prospect of Remus participating in a big production like that, always being the type to opt for downtown bars and coming directly in touch with art. She does smile though, because it’s still a good thing for him. “That’s great.”

Remus gives her a knowing smile, answering a question she didn't even voice. “Under a pseudonym.”

“Ah.”

“I don’t want it to interfere with ‘ Moony’s ’.”

There he is. Good old Remus who puts his art above everything and anything else.

“It’s amazing. Very…you.” Like you.

Remus takes off his glasses then, placing them on the table as he squints his eyes at her suspiciously. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“It is.” Sirius says simply, falling seamlessly back at the easiness of being honest and open with Remus.

He smiles then, kindly but his eyes are lingering on her for a bit longer, letting Sirius know that his mind is working.

“So, what’s your new Bogart’s name?”

Sirius shouldn’t be surprised at Remus’ bravery to ask her, but she is a bit. She isn’t surprised at the reference though, the small reminders that Remus remembers everything. She does too.

She realises then that it’s them. They’re a retelling of Casablanca only Remus has it all wrong because there’s no Bogart. It’s not her and Finn that are the lead characters and Remus is certainly not a ‘husband ’ swept up in another’s love story. They’ve always been the main characters, Remus and Sirius, and it will always be their story that will leave a stigma no matter what follows in their lives. At least for Sirius.

It was their story that had to be sacrificed in favour of a dream, and the pain carried by the loss of it is evidence of the magnificent nature that their love was.

“Finn is in London.” Sirius says.

“London.” He nods. He’s about to say something else, probably comment on how ‘ nice ’ he seems to be when Sirius beats him to it, refusing to be interrupted.

“He had to move for work. So… no Bogart.”  She smiles to reassure that there’s no malice or hurt inside her.

“Ah.” Remus nods, taking another sip of his coffee before he looks away. “I know the feeling.”

Sirius takes in a deep breath, a tightness in her stomach as she takes in the hints of sadness in Remus' smile. She recognises that there’s no regret between them, only bits of grief for what they both had to give up in order to be happy.

“Hey,” He begins, saving Sirius from having to come up with an answer. “Did you know that this window, over there, is the window from Casablanca?”

He’s teasing her, bringing forth a lighter topic, a memory that carries happiness and new beginnings.

Sirius chuckles, being caught off guard by the topic. “You know, I might have heard that somewhere.”

“Yeah?” He turns back, meeting her eyes with a bright grin.

“Mhmm.” She nods solemnly, biting her lips to conceal the grins Remus surely knows is there.

“Amazing, that.” He decides, reaching to put his glasses back on.

He offers to walk around for a while and Sirius is nothing but happy to accept. She suggests they walk to the direction of her set, and that brings them to the topic of the movie Sirius is currently starring at.

She tells him about the plot, how much she enjoys filming at a place she’d only ever been a spectator of great things taking place. It feels odd, like a parallel dream that they’d walked these same streets five years ago, nothing but faith in what is now their reality.

Remus is taking everything in with rapt attention. He’s amazed by what she’s telling him, familiar awe in his eyes and quick compliments as Sirius wills her heart to slow down.

Time flies by as they talk, and soon the number of people gathered in the corners signals them of their arrival at the set. Sirius offers Remus to stay, although it might be boring since it’s a whole process of hair, make-up and set design before they actually get to filming the scenes. Remus kindly declines, telling her that he ought to get to rehearsal before tonight which brings them to where they are now.

They’re standing facing each other, a familiar softness to their expressions as they work their way around saying goodbye, wondering if they will get to see each other soon.

“You should come again.” Remus says quietly. “At the bar. Friday’s a nice crowd, you’ll like it.”

“I-yeah. Yeah, of course. Tomorrow night, then.” Sirius says, feeling elated to make plans that will allow her to see him again, take a better look into what Remus' life is now.

“Tomorrow, yes.” He agrees. “And I-I mean… I could come by sometime. Watch your scenes, you know.”

“Yes.” Sirius agrees quickly. “Yeah, that-that would be good.”

“Good.” Remus repeats, looking equally pleased. “Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow.”

They linger a bit longer, both of them reluctant to take the first step away but they finally reach a mutual understanding and their feets start moving before their eyes do.

They’re wearing matching grins as they leave, floating in something that isn’t new but is wonderful altogether.

Once again, like many moons ago, they’re both oblivious to the fact that the other has turned to watch them go.




chapter III. spring; melodies of love.


☾

Remus had one policy for ‘Moony’s’ and it was no reservations.

He wanted to keep the character of the bar relaxed and welcoming to anyone who came in and wished to hang out. He’d had no overcrowding problems so far so it had all been working out perfectly.

Which is why when he told Dempsey to reserve a table on the far right corner near the staging area he received a troubled look.

It had been a whole five minutes of Remus insisting that it wasn’t a reservation and ‘Would you just hold the table?’

Dempsey had been quite amused at his exasperation, even though he tried to hide it, but finally agreed to hold the table for him.

Which brought Remus to now, night in full swing as the band engrossed the audience in a quick rhythm.

Friday was a good night, a lot of people opting to end the week with a fun night out which meant the place was buzzing with chatter and people coming in. Remus had been on his feet for quite some time, greeting regulars and friends between checking with the staff that everything was working properly. All while his eyes kept straying to the landing.

There had been an electric feeling inside him since yesterday morning, keeping him on edge at the prospect of meeting Sirius again, at ‘Moony’s’ of all places.

Remus wasn’t known to be a clumsy person, but he was more than glad when Sirius showed up, so he would be able to put to rest that part of him that feared that she wouldn’t, and also perhaps stop himself from knocking stools and glasses over in his absent-mindedness.

Sirius always looked beautiful. The setting didn’t matter. Whether it was under the sun, soft breeze moving through her hair, during the sunset when her skin would be bathed in soft pinks or even when she’d just woken up, sleepy eyes and pillow prints on her cheekbones as she beamed at you, it didn’t matter. Remus’ breath would always catch upon seeing her, like now.

She had just walked through the door, pausing briefly to scan the room with a small frown, no doubt looking for him. Remus smiled at the sight of her, smile turning into a full grin when she finally noticed him, her eyes visibly brightening as she gave him one of her loveliest grins.

It took him back to that first night years ago when he’d walked past her, mentally slapping himself for being able to walk away from such a vision in his state of grumpiness, but it also took him back a few months, when they stood in similar distance in this very same bar, something else entirely transpiring as they walked away from each other once again.

But now she was here, moving towards him gracefully, excusing herself whenever someone stood in her way and giving them a kind smile for letting her pass through.

Remus’ fingers twitched on his sides, itching to reach out for her but he put them inside his trousers’ pockets instead.

“It looks amazing.” Sirius offered as a greeting, her eyes dancing across the room, taking in the occupied tables, the excitement and joy flowing through the room, the music keeping everything alive.

So do you.


☆

“I have a table saved.” Remus tells her, pointing towards the far corner where a table sat unoccupied. He gestured for her to go first, ready to walk to the table when she felt a warm hand on her waist, settling softly and leading her through the tables and the few people who were dancing.

Sirius settled on the table as Remus went back to the bar to get them both drinks, coming back soon with a whiskey sour for him and the same old Martini with three olives for Sirius.

She couldn’t help but watch him, handsome as ever in his forest green suit and being completely in his element while Sirius tried to shake the electric feeling from her skin, put there by his affectionate touch.

They talked and talked.

Remus got to tell her about the interior design of the place, the entire thinking behind every piece and scrap hanging on the walls and placed upon the tables. He told her about finding the band one night, playing in another cramped bar in the city and falling in love with them instantly. He rants about each one of them, how passionate and talented they are and how each one of them brings something ecstatic into their performances.

He talks about Dempsey, how thankful he is for him and how hard it was to actually buy the place but eventually managed to do it (without coming anywhere near pool-brunches and pop bands). How Juno has a family now, how she’s moved upstate and how he constantly tries to convince her to let him give Daniel piano lessons.

Sirius laughs and takes everything in like oxygen, feeling like she’s getting a glimpse into everything she’s missed from the past five years.

In return she tells him about Paris. How it wasn’t easy at first, being away from home but managing to do it with Minerva’s unyielding support and faith in her. She tells him about the premiere, the initial shock of cameras pointed at her and how everything seemed to fall into place after that. More auditions, more movies, a few incredible plays all over France and a few more in New York before she’d decided it was time to return to LA. How landing her current role was godsend, providing her with the security she needed to pack everything and take the plane to LAX.

She avoids talking about Finn, only mentioning him briefly in appreciation for supporting her decision to move back here even though he had nothing in it for him.

They fall back into place, the chemistry securing the effortless way in which they exist with one another.

There is one thing playing on her mind, over and over and she tries to muster up the courage to ask but doesn’t. It’s Remus who keeps the conversation light and flowing.

“There was a big poster of you in ‘Eleanor’ on the side street, back in December. And much more throughout the years across the city.” He tells her, something resembling pride for her in his eyes.

“Oh my god,” Sirius barks out a laugh, “I remember always being scared that my eyes would look too big in these.”

“What are you talking about?” Remus is laughing along with her now, the sight bringing butterflies to her stomach.

“You know-just.. Look weird and-”

“Sirius, what-”

“Scary, you know?”

“I think you looked beautiful.” Remus is quick to say, her laugh turning into a soft smile before he speaks again. “I think you look more beautiful than ever.”

Sirius’ breath catches at the unhesitating honesty laced in his voice, eyes roaming all over his face for traces of humour, but there’s nothing. Nothing but genuine affection as he sat there, looking at her under purple lights and sax solos.

She notices his eyes are glued to hers, barely catching them slipping to her lips before they’re back on her eyes. Sirius' lips part in an exhale and Remus’ eyes catch that too, and it’s all a haze of amber and skin decorated with moles and freckles when Remus swallows.

Sirius’ eyes flee to his lips momentarily and then they’re both leaning in, slowly as if it’s something fragile they’re treading on, built on something entirely different than the last time but being all the more divine.

There’s a ghost of a breath on her lips, and her eyes slip closed as they come closer and closer until…they get interrupted.



☾

Remus could kill Dempsey the minute he interrupts them and he’s pretty sure the death glare he shoots him communicates that clearly.

But apparently Desmond wants to say goodbye and it’s with a lingering look that borders on pleading that Remus leaves Sirius to the table. Sirius grins, trying to contain her laughter, put there by the pathetic expression of his face undoubtedly, but her reassuring nod puts him at ease. It’s the thought of returning back to this later and the elation of being under Sirius’ spell, nearling kissing her, that makes his legs move.

God, he almost kissed her.

How much he wants to kiss her, get drunk on everything that is her, locks between his fingers, sandalwood bewitching him as he finds religion in her touch. The dazed grey after each kiss, the touch of her fingers on his face, stroking, mapping out in wonder.

He needs to kiss her.

But the night gets hectic from them on.

More people come to greet him and before he knows it’s time for his own performance.

It’s nothing nostalgic this time, just pure thrill spilling from his fingers accompanied by the trumpet, giving the music the twist and unpredictability it needs to become exciting.

He keeps throwing glaces her way, drawn to her in an innate sense he doesn’t care to fight.

Sirius is always looking back, moving along to the music, positively beaming as she motivates Remus to play harder and better if only to keep her laughing. At one point she gives him a goofy grimace, similar to the one’s she did when she came with that ridiculous request of ‘I ran ’, and Remus’ fingers nearly stumble over the keys in the sudden wave of love that spills inside him, setting every inch of him on fire. She notices his surprise and there’s a look of delight and mischief on her face, showing him that this was her plan all along.

His ridiculous, magnificent star.

It’s not until most of the people are starting to leave and the music takes in a softer melody that he finds his way back to her, apologising for leaving her in the first place and making sure she had been enjoying herself despite his absence.

Sirius reassures him, a strange expression on her face as she places one elbow on the table in front of her, chin resting on her palm.

There’s unmistakable fondness in there, and the same confession from December.

I am proud of you.

He hopes, desperately, that their promise still holds to the extent he can bring it forth, give it life and ground to flourish again.

It is spring after all.

It has gotten quite late when Sirius tells him that it’s time she gets going. She has an early set the next day, and she looks reluctant to go but Remus smiles despite the disappointment that is to part ways with her.

He helps her put on her jacket and leads her out the bar, up the stairs and out the sidewalk to say goodbye.

“So…I-” Remus says, standing close to her.

“Come to my set on Monday.” Sirius interrupts, tilting her head in silent question.

“Yes. Yeah, I will.” Remus says, a surprised smile on his face at the blunt invitation.

“Good.”

“Good.” Remus agrees and takes a deep breath to buy himself some time to gather his thoughts, “I really hope you had fun.”

“I did.” Sirius’ smile takes a nostalgic edge to it, “You’re saving jazz.”

Remus snorts at that, going back to one of his extensive rants on the subject. “The people coming here are saving it. The band and the staff, everyone by showing it the love it deserves.”

“Your passion brings out the love in people.” She says simply, casually making Remus’ heart skip a bit.

He buries his hands in his pockets once again, mind drunk on the need to frame her face and kiss her until the city is dressed in sunrise’s oranges.

“Monday.” Is all he says, coming out like a promise.

“Monday.” She agrees, seeing his deflection for what it is and grinning all the same.

They linger, like always, the invisible string tugging with each step that pulls them away. Just as Remus turns to go back inside, Sirius calls from him, her voice carrying in the quiet empty street like song.

“You kept the logo.” Sirius says. There are words unsaid, underlying questions in her statement, her piercing gaze that does nothing but soothe him.

You kept me in your heart.

Remus grins, head tilting in a question. Isn’t it obvious?

“Of course I did.”

You are my heart.

Something transpires before they turn around, hearts filled with anticipation and renewal.

It’s something wonderful, the shine flickering back into a glow just for them.


chapter IV. summer, return to the city of stars.

☆

Summer brought with it scents of primrose and a warmth that hung in the air and made you glow.

Perhaps it had more to do with the amber she found herself melting under each time it looked at her, but summer was blooming nonetheless.

They were spending as much time together as they could, falling back into old habits of roaming the cities to try new cuisines, along with the old ones. Using breaks between rehearsals and filming to walk at the park, nice streets of the city to simply get a coffee under afternoon rays of sun.

Sirius had frequented Moony’s a lot of nights, and Remus in turn had stood behind the director as Sirius acted out a scene, ready to cheer for her the minute the director yelled ‘Cut!’.

Their most convenient plans though, were meeting for breakfast.

At first they’d meet at the cafe near Sirius’ set, or even downtown close to Moony’s, but as time went on the locations and breakfast spots extended closer and closer to their homes.

Remus has been introduced to the little old lady that owned the antique shop near her home, blushing under her fussing hands and unrelenting compliments while Sirius stood in the corner and tried to contain her laughter at his wide eyes that asked for help.

The first time Sirius invited Remus over for breakfast she’d been bouncing on her feet until he knocked on the door signalling his arrival. She’d never felt more beautiful with flowers all around the house, sun spilling from the wide open french doors as she welcomed him inside, her sundress moving with the slight breeze Remus brought with him but also the huge dog in her feet.

Remus had bent down, quickly indulging Padfoot in pets and sweet talk, asking him questions that got delighted barks and tail wags as responses. Sirius thanked him profusely for the bag of pastries he’d brought with him and excused herself to the kitchen under the pretence of finishing up with coffee when in reality she needed two minutes to herself to tame the urge to kiss Remus stupid right then and there after being incredibly adorable with Padfoot. She also needed to compose herself because Remus’ unbuttoned collar tended to look all the more inviting these days.

But they had not kissed yet.

And Sirius was dying to kiss him.


☾

It wasn’t for lack of trying.

But public spaces were forbidden and they tended to get interrupted when either of them would muster up the courage to lean in.

Whenever they ended up close between Sirius’ scenes, someone would eventually call for her, whether it was hair, make-up, the director or anyone who wasn’t Remus.

At Moony’s it was the same, plus Remus didn’t want to kiss her and then having to leave her alone for the rest of the night in favour of playing.

The first time they had breakfast at her home it had almost happened. They were sitting on a comfortable sofa in her sunroom, glass doors open as they looked out the garden. There was a spell of warmth on them, talking away with the occasional soft chuckle, relaxed smiles on their faces. Sirius had looked stellar then.

The sun was hitting her from all the right angles, falling on her hair and spilling on her face across her nose and eyes, giving the grey a transparent look that made them appear pastel blue. Her lips were glistening with strawberry juice and Remus was convinced the warmth surrounding him emanated solely from her skin.

He’d leaned in then, just a bit, before pausing. Sirius noticed and tilted her head with a puzzled smile, no doubt wondering why he hesitated. But that’s when it came to him.

She sat there, a beautiful, intelligent, kind creature within arms reach, everything stellar and warm and glowing in this world smiling at him.

He couldn’t kiss her then because he had to leave soon, and if he were to kiss her, he wouldn’t be able to take a step away from her even to do something as insignificant as breathing.

Remus needed to do this right.

He had a plan to do it right.

☆

The first week of June Sirius had 3 days off of filming.

They were supposed to recharge and Sirius needed that time off desperately.

When Remus found out he asked her not to make any plans for Friday the 3rd, claiming he had some place in mind he wanted to take her to.

Sirius tried to ask some questions but Remus wouldn’t budge. In the end she was happy to indulge him and allow herself to feel excited.


Friday afternoon there was a honk and sounds of jazz coming from outside her home, bringing a wave of memories along with it.

Remus drove across the city, Sirius shooting him curious glances and paying attention to their route to try and make out their destination.

It all occurred to her when Remus passed a certain exit and took the road up the hills, the view of the city growing as they moved up the mountains.

Griffith Observatory looks the same as always, white walls shimmering under the sun dipping lower by the minute.

They get out of the car, and Remus takes hold of her hand, leading her through the park to the main entrance.

They keep close to each other, Remus leading her gently up the stairs, across marble floors that once held starlight and past the rotunda, the astronomical frescos on the ceiling looking down on them.

They stop outside the Planetarium, exchanging looks of mutual recognition, seeing this for what it really is, a place they’d always hoped they’d get back to.

A new beginning.

Remus opens the door, and with the projector on the room is already flooded in constellations, milky way and galaxies dancing around, orbiting around a love so grant, walking down the stairs to stand in the centre of it all, the centre of the universe.

The same melody plays for them, only now, in the crescendo, they don’t transcend.

There is the same magic and beauty of the astra, cosmic forces dancing around them. But they don’t waltz through the stars in a celestial dance, they don’t need to reach for anything.

Everything they need is in the palms of their hands, their dreams and aspirations like glimmering stardust and moondust, bathed in the wonder that is now their reality.

Amber and grey melt into each other, meeting in a heavenly kiss, and the galaxies spill around them in celebration and transcendence.

I felt it from the first embrace I shared with you

That now our dreams

They've finally come true

…

City of stars

You never shined so brightly