The Task
November, 1994.
Hermione kept to herself at dinner, just eating and getting back to the common room as quickly as possible to get as much homework done before she had to head to the astronomy tower. Parvati and Lavender came upstairs to the dorms and got her when it was time. They were wearing pajamas and Hermione had changed into some sweatpants and a jumper.
Parvati and Lavender talked excitedly of their little stargazing assignment but Hermione stayed quiet as they walked. She hadn't been particularly excited to be in such close proximity to Harry any time soon. He was already there when they arrived. He was talking with Neville on one of the blankets and looked up when Hermione entered the tower, giving a small smile and nod. Against her wishes, she returned it. She went to sit with Parvati and Lavender near Harry and Neville. All of the Slytherins and Gryffindors began filing in, all of them wearing pajamas or sweatpants. It registered in Hermione’s mind that she had only ever seen these people in Hogwarts robes so seeing them wearing pajamas mildly shocked her. Especially the Slytherin’s. Them wearing comfortable clothing seemed to break the sort of tough and cold air around them. They all looked so cozy.
Draco was one of the last ones to come up to the tower. He was with Crabbe, Blaise, and Pansy. He wore black sweatpants and a black long sleeved shirt. Without the layers of robes and button down shirts, she could see every shape of the upper half of his body. His stomach was slender and his shoulders broad, a little bit muscular. She made herself look away after a few seconds of studying his figure. She felt his eyes on her after he sat down on one of the blankets with his friends on the opposite side of the room. The Gryffindors and Slytherins had separated as they did in every other aspect of life.
Draco sat with a scowl on his face. Clearly this was not how he would have chosen to spend his night.
“Students! Students!” Professor Sinastra shouted over the noisy class to capture their attention. “Welcome to stargazing night, a little party as well as assignment I do for all of my fourth year classes. You’ll find drinks and snacks around the room as well as games to play. You’ll split into pairs now and when it is your group's turn, you’ll go on the balcony and draw the required constellations–two groups can be out there at a time–one from Gryffindor–one from Slytherin. Find your groups and then we’ll get started.”
Lavender and Parvati had already linked arms next to her so Hermione stood up in search of another Gryffindor to pair with. She looked at Ron–but then he walked over to Neville. Dean went to Seamus. It seemed that everyone had a partner. Then she saw Harry, looking around just as desperately and alone as she. Everyone was paired off–she knew that. She made her way over to him.
“Partners?” she asked in a quiet voice.
He nodded and gave her another one of those little smiles.
“Everyone paired? Alright, who would like to start on the balcony?”
Parvati and Lavender immediately raised their hands, wanting to go first.
“Okay there's a group from Gryffindor.” She scanned the Slytherin side of the room. No one raised their hand or met her eye. “Okay, I’ll choose! Pansy and Daphne, you two will start on the balcony with Parvati and Lavender.”
The two groups of girls exchanged foul looks before heading out to the balcony with their parchment and quills.
Everyone else was free to go around the room and make conversation or do whatever they wanted. No one particularly wanted to be there. They just had to stay for the full two hours to get credit for the assignment. Hermione and Harry stayed where they were sitting. She noticed him watching Ron from the corner of her eye. She felt a pang of sadness.
“You should talk to him,” she said.
He looked at her like he had been caught and then his eyes darkened. “He wouldn't want to.”
She let out a long breath. The task would be in two days on Sunday.
“Professor Moody’s given me an idea for the task,” Harry said. “I think I should use my broom–to fight the dragon. It’ll be much easier.”
Hermione grinned brightly. “That’s great, Harry!” She would be glad for any idea that would help him in the task.
“There's one thing about it, though. I need to use a summoning charm and I’m not sure if I can do it from that far away. I’ve been trying–but–but–it's really difficult. I was going to ask you–but I understand if you don't want to help–I haven't been the best friend lately.”
Her eyes widened. “No–of course I want to help, Harry. I just–I want to make sure you're safe. I’ll help.”
He smiled and glanced at Ron again. Hermione sighed. She swore she would take a break from Harry's ever changing moods, but she had just agreed to help him again. She would never say no to helping him–the thought seemed to dawn on her. She would do anything to make sure he was okay–safe–but how far would she go? She felt so much devotion to her friends no matter how little they returned. She pushed the thought away–something she had been doing increasingly more often.
The pair joined Dean and Seamus on their blankets although Ron and Neville were also with them. Harry sat far from Ron, making their current feud extremely obvious to anyone looking in. Seamus was talking about the Quidditch World Cup which he had also attended–but only the good parts. He talked about how Ireland took the victory although Krum caught the snitch, proclaiming his own Irish nationality with much pride. Ron looked dejected which seemed to egg Seamus on even more. He left out the things that happened after the cup–which most people seemed to, Hermione had noticed. No one wanted to acknowledge the looming danger which muggle borns like Seamus and Hermione faced. He was a half-blood after all. Everyone seemed to gloss over the fact that the Dark Mark–Voldemort’s Dark mark–had been cast into the sky for the first time in over a decade. Hermione didn't blame them, she didn't want to believe that Voldemort’s followers were active again. She wanted to shield it from her view forever and never accept that there was a growing group of wizards who wanted to see people like Hermione killed or barred from using magic.
“When Krum caught the snitch, I screamed so loud I lost my voice. Why did he catch it, anyway? Didn't make much sense in my opinion–they could have come back,” Seamus was saying.
Ron perked up. “Well–well he was just–blood hell–Harry,” he looked at the boy, “What did you say? About why Krum caught the snitch?” He looked like he was desperate for someone to prove that he was right for ever liking Krum.
Harry’s expression was one of shock. Ron had not addressed him in weeks.
“I–uh–I said that he wanted to end the game on his own terms–that he knew they were going to lose anyway and wanted a dignified conclusion.”
“Right, right,” said Ron as if nothing had ever changed between him and Harry, like they were still best friends.
No one else volunteered to go out to the balcony and do their work so Professor Sinastra started picking groups at random. First it was Neville and Ron with Crabbe and Goyle. They left looking dissatisfied with the people they had to share the balcony with. Hermione looked around at the Slytherin groups that were left. The only Slytherins that had not gone out to the balcony yet were Theodore, Millicent, Blaise, and Draco. She assumed that Blaise and Draco were paired off together and that meant that she and Harry had a 50% chance of getting chosen to share the balcony with Draco, which she was not up for. She knew he would be hostile toward Harry and that Harry would be mean right back. Surely, Professor Sinastra would not put Harry and Malfoy on the balcony together. It would be a bloodbath. One of them would end up “falling” off or worse.
Ron and Neville came back after 20 minutes looking disheveled. Crabbe and Goyle were some of the most unfriendly Slytherins. Professor Sinastra got everyone’s attention again.
“Okay–let's see–Draco and Blaise–you haven't gone–you’ll go. And then–which Gryffindors have not gone to the balcony?” Hermione reluctantly raised her hand, feeling Draco and Blaise’s intimidating gaze on her and Harry. “Ah–Hermione and Harry–you’ll go as well. Off to the balcony you four!”
Hermione visibly flinched when the professor said her name. They picked up their things and went to the balcony, bracing themselves. Harry looked seething which made her wonder what exactly Draco had said to him. It must have been horrible, she thought. When she stepped onto the balcony, the sounds of chatter and music from the astronomy tower seemed to fade away. Professor Sinastra must have put a silencing charm on the balcony so they could work without distractions.
She and Harry took a seat on the large pillow seats which were placed for them and Blaise and Draco sat on the opposite ones. Draco was silent, much to her surprise, and Blaise, although he looked angry about being in such close proximity to a muggle born, didn't say anything either. He had always been quiet but Draco not making any uncivil remarks shocked her. They just all went about their work. Soon enough, 20 minutes had passed and not a word had been muttered between groups. They just did their drawings and returned to the party. Hermione couldn't help but glance at Draco every once in a while when they were back inside. She tried to remember a time at Hogwarts when he had been so quiet and undisturbing. One time, he caught her looking at him but instead of piercing through her with those cold gray eyes, he averted his eyes. That was new too. Usually he waited for Hermione to look away as if she were inconveniencing him. She was bewildered. Had the world flipped upside down?
The party was over after many conversations about quidditch and the triwizard tournament. Harry and Ron exchanged more words than they had in forever. Hermione was content–but not really. The thing about Draco was still bothering her. She needed to know what had happened. She tried to get his attention from across the room as subtly as possible while Professor Sinastra was thanking them all for coming and doing the assignment. She gave a little gesture with her hand but caught Pansy Parkinson’s attention by accident. She quickly turned her head back to the teacher, eyes wide. She reluctantly looked back over to the Slytherins and eventually got Malfoy to look at her for a second. She used her finger to point at the balcony in the smallest movement she could muster which would still convey her message. She didn't know when else she would get the chance. She mouthed the words 'tonight’ to him and he gave the tiniest nod of his head in return and looked away.
Everyone stayed up for a bit that night after the excitement of the party. Hermione had to find a way out of the common room while Harry, Ron, Seamus, Parvati, and Lavender still sat on the couches talking. Once she assumed it had been long enough since the party ended that Professor Sinastra would no longer be in the astronomy tower, she spoke to the group.
“I forgot–I was supposed to talk to Professor Sinastra after the party–I wonder if she’s still there!” she exclaimed.
Harry looked at her. “Its been a while since we left. She probably already went to sleep.”
“I better go check anyway–”
“We’ll come,” Parvati spoke, gesturing between herself and Lavender.
She gave them an apologetic smile, waving them off. “No–I might be a while–I'll be back later–bye!”
She had said all of this while simultaneously backing out of the portrait hole and almost tripping over her own feet. Once the common room had closed, leaving her outside, she sighed rather dramatically. She hated lying to her friends.
She cast a silencing charm on her shoes and began her walk to the astronomy tower. Hopefully she hadn't made Draco wait too long for her. Within the first minute of walking, she spotted Professor Snape and scrambled back behind the wall. She could hear his quiet footsteps fading away in the other direction. She let out a sigh of relief. What was he doing out past 11:00 p.m. anyway?
The rest of the walk was clear of human life. She climbed the stairs to the astronomy tower and found Draco at the top, staring off the balcony.
She approached him slowly. She hadn’t talked to him in a while, and now that she had sought him out–invited him, she didn't know what to say. She slid beside him silently and he let out a breath when he noticed her.
“Thought you weren't coming,” he said.
“Everyone was still in the common room so I had to find an excuse to leave.”
He didn't say anything else. Hermione cleared her throat at the silence and he stared down at her with his gray eyes. He looked tired–probably because it was almost midnight after a long week of school. She suddenly felt bad for dragging him out here so late, and resolved to have this conversation as quickly as possible.
“I wanted to talk to you–about–um–Harry.”
His eyes narrowed. “So he told you?”
“Wait–what–told me what? Is this about what you said to him that made him upset?”
“So he hasn't told you?” he asked, eyes inquisitive.
“No, what did you say?”
He looked away from her. “Ask him.”
“Malfoy–just tell me–I'm sure it won't make me dislike you any more than I already do–”
“I don't want to talk about this.” He looked uneasy.
Now she really wondered what he had said to Harry. Could it really be so bad that Hermione couldn't know? Ginny knew. Then a thought hit her so suddenly, she felt idiotic for not realizing it before.
“Is–is–it about me?” she brought herself to ask.
He looked down at her again, but this time he didn't look angry or annoyed, he looked something else. She wasn't sure. He nodded slightly. Her stomach dropped. That's why she couldn't know, he had said something so terrible about her to Harry that he wouldn't even tell her. She felt a pang of regret for ever being mad at Harry. He hadn't been hiding things from her, he had been protecting her. She just had to go and seek out the truth and end up even more hurt. She looked at Draco filled with fury, her eyes filling with tears. She didn't know why, but she felt sort of betrayed more than anything. He had talked to her–been nice to her for the first time ever–and then he did this. She didn't want to feel like he had wronged her. He had said so many fucked up things to her over the years and she never batted an eye. Now, it was different, it was like a knife was slowly stabbing into her heart. She wanted to leave, run away from him and never find out what he said, but then he spoke.
“I shouldn't have said it.” His voice was so quiet.
She looked at him and his face seemed to soften at her teary eyes. She was not going to cry, she was not going to cry.
“What did you say?” she asked with the most powerful voice she could muster.
He sighed and shook his head. Was it really that bad? She wanted to slap him across the face like she had done in third year. She balled her hands into fists and looked up at the sky, taking deep breaths. Silence settled between them and lasted for a few minutes. She was so focused on the sky that he could have completely left the tower without her noticing, but he was still there when she checked. He was staring at her again.
“Would you stop doing that!” she exclaimed.
She swore she saw the corner of his mouth turn up. It wasn't funny, it was annoying.
“Doing what?” he asked, amused.
“Staring at me like you want to kill me.”
“I don't know what you’re talking about.”
His smile said otherwise.
She rolled her eyes and looked back at the sky. She wished she could stay in this moment with the stars, not knowing what Draco said about her, but she knew her brain would never shut off until she found out. She needed to ask Ginny when Harry wasn't around.
She did the next day, the day before the first task.
It was Ginny’s first time going to Hogsmeade. She had been filled with excitement at being able to go to Honeydukes and Zonkos. Hermione helped Harry with his summoning charm from a long distance in the morning and he’d perfected it with her help before it was time to leave. She and Ginny had to drag Harry from the castle because he wanted to stay and research dragons some more although they all knew there was no point. Ginny ran off with her friends and Harry and Hermione were left alone. They went to Honeydukes first. A Ravenclaw girl in their year named Cho was there and Harry seemed to be enraptured in her. Hermione had to hold back a laugh until they were out of the shop and in The Three Broomsticks.
“Harry! I can’t believe how obvious you are!” she laughed.
“W–What?” he stuttered.
“Don't play dumb, the whole shop could see you staring at Cho Chen!”
He put his head in his hands. “Oh god,” he muttered. “Was it really that obvious?”
Hermione chuckled. “Okay–maybe not so obvious that the whole shop saw you–but very obvious. Why dont you talk to her?”
“We do talk–like–well–sort of–we talk sometimes.”
“And what do you talk about?”
“Well–I just sort of say ‘hi’ and then she’s like ‘hi, Harry’ and that's it–most of the time.” He looked like he was thoroughly embarrassed by what he just said.
It's not like Hermione had any romantical endeavors going for her, but she knew from watching muggle romance movies and reading that that was not how you got a girl to like you.
“Oh, Harry, you need to ask her questions, like ‘how is your day?’ or ‘what class do you have next?’. I definitely shouldn't be giving advice on this subject but it’s very basic stuff.”
“But what if I ask her how her day is and she just says ‘good’ and nothing else? Do I just walk away or–”
“I actually don't know. Maybe ask another question and see what happens?” They both laughed at their inexperience in talking to the opposite sex. You would think they’d be amazing at it with how close they were to each other, but it was different. They were best friends and they talked to each other like best friends did. It didn't seem to directly translate to talking to someone you have a crush on.
Hermione paused for a moment, Harry’s laughter was music to her ears. She hadn't heard it be so genuine in a long time. Harry and Ron’s split had taken a toll on her, she knew, but now it really made itself clear to her. Neither boy was very happy without the other and their unhappiness seemed to rub off on Hermione the most. She only ever wanted what was best for both of them and their fighting and ignorance of each other showed her just how lost the three of them were when split apart. Hermione wanted to scream in both of their faces that they were ruining everything, their carefully curated friendship, but she knew their feud had to take its course. She knew that their group would eventually end up united again because of how lost they seemed to be without each other. Hermione just wanted to speed up the process a bit.
“Have you and Ron been speaking more? I noticed that you guys actually acknowledged each other last night.”
Harry sighed. “He seems to be less mad, but that doesn't mean I've forgiven him for ignoring me for a month for no reason.”
“Well, he does have a reason, Harry, even if it's not a very good one. He thinks you put your name into the goblet of fire without telling him. You probably haven't noticed, but he looks at you like you're some god. He probably thinks you were trying to garner more fame and that you didn't even have the decency to tell him.” Draco's words rolled around in her head. “He feels betrayed.”
“But I didn't put my name into the goblet of fire.”
“I think he's starting to understand that, and that's why he's not ignoring you anymore, but he still feels bad for all of it so he's still keeping his distance. You need to show him that you want to be his friend again, even if you're still angry. If you don't do it for him, do it for me. I miss us three. I feel like I'm in some sort of limbo trying to be both of your friends and not choose one over the other.”
Harry narrowed his eyes. “I didn't know you felt like that. Why didn't you tell me?”
“You had your own things going on and it really wasn't a big deal. I think we all just feel a bit lost right now, being disconnected.”
“You're right about all of it. I need to get him back. I'll talk to him before the tournament tomorrow.”
Hermione smiled. Her world was rebuilding itself.
She caught up with Ginny on the walk back to Hogwarts. She pulled her from her friends and Ginny reluctantly followed, seeming to sense what Hermione needed to talk about.
Once they were out of earshot, Hermione asked, “Tell me the truth, Ginny. What did Malfoy tell Harry? I know it was about me.”
“Wha–how did you–”
“I just know. Please tell me Ginny.”
Ginny let out a long breath and then stopped them in the middle of the walkway, pulling Hermione to face her.
“Do you really want to know?” she asked.
Hermione swallowed. She wasn't sure anymore, judging by the look Ginny was giving her. Solemn and unsmiling. But she nodded nonetheless. She needed to know.
“Malfoy and his friends approached Harry after astronomy, just saying the normal nasty things about him, that he was a fame chaser and all that. But then they brought you up, saying that Harry should ‘run back to his little mudblood girlfriend’ or something like that–I can't remember what Harry said–anyway. Harry retaliated sort of, you know just like ‘Don't talk about her’ and stuff–but then Malfoy–he said–um.” She took a breath and steadied herself, her eyes were shiny. “He said,” she tried again, “‘Go run back to your little mudblood before the death eaters string her up. You know she’s next.’” Ginny looked immensely uncomfortable.
Hermione was at a loss for words. She swayed for several seconds, before gazing at the girl in front of her. She was filled with guilt at making Ginny recite what Malfoy had said out loud.
“I–thank–you for telling me, Ginny. I–I’m gonna go back now–back to Hogwarts.” Hermione sped away down the road as Ginny called for her a few times.
Hermione just kept walking, suddenly feeling unable to breathe. A fear of death hit her squarely in her chest. She suddenly wished she had not gone to Hogsmeade, and that she had stayed in her dorm for the entire day. It was safer there. She had always felt such fear for her friends and family, Harry being picked for the triwizard tournament, her parents after those muggles had been tortured at the Quidditch World Cup, but now she felt an insurmountable fear of her own demise. Malfoy was right. The death eaters hated muggle-borns more than anything. She was at risk. All she had to do was exist for a group of evil wizards to want her dead.
She arrived back at Hogwarts and went straight to her dorm. No one said hello on the way, seeming to sense that she would not be in the mood to talk. The moment the door to her room was shut and she was sure it was empty of her roommates, tears clouded her eyes before she even realized she needed to cry. She let them spill as she never did. She flopped onto her bed and sobbed. She tried to convince herself that she was being dramatic but that made her weep even more.
Once her eyes had been exhausted and she had no wails left to give, she lay on her back staring at the ceiling, a sense of emptiness surrounding her. I should be studying, she thought. She wanted to curl up in a hole and never talk to anyone again. Why should she be studying when, clearly, being the brightest witch of her age did not stop anyone from wanting her strung up and killed?
“I shouldn't have said it.” Malfoys words rang in her ears. “I shouldn't have said it.” What the hell did that mean? That he shouldn't have said it or that he didn't mean it? Of course he meant it. He despised her and this was all the proof she needed. That made her feel even worse. She had wanted to believe that he was somehow better than before. That him being nice to her wasn't an act. She hated the way that she cared what he thought of her. Even after he said the most despicable thing she had ever heard, she was trying to justify it and tell herself that he somehow didn't mean it. His words from the night before were stuck in her head, replaying over and over. She wanted him out. She wanted his name gone from her lips and his face erased from her mind. She wanted all of the times he was civil with her to have never existed so she could only see the bad and hate him. Why was it suddenly so hard to hate him?
She fell asleep in a puddle of tears, exhausted and drained. She started awake three hours later, unsure of the time. Was it today or yesterday? She checked the time. 5:14. She assumed that meant it was night–still the same day. She took a long shower, trying to cleanse herself of not only dirt, but thoughts and feelings she wished she didn't have. Then she headed down to the common room, dinner would be starting soon. The last dinner before task one. She would hide her own despair by smiling and reassuring Harry that he would do well.
—
Harry had talked to Ron in the morning about how he didnt want to fight anymore. Now Ron was leaving the stands of the arena to wish Harry good luck in the champions tent. The challenge had been announced. The champions were to retrieve a dragon's egg without being killed. Hermione was filled with hope that the summoning charm would work and Harry’s broom would come with the flick of his wand and the incantation “Accio Firebolt.” It was a major advantage and it needed to work.
There were four dragons, one for each champion. Harry had drawn the Hungarian Horntail which she had read was one of the most aggressive and dangerous dragons in the wizarding world. Great. He would also be competing last. The suspense and anxiety would be immeasurable.
Cedric went first. He used transfiguration to distract the dragon and actually retrieved the egg–but not before burning his face. It could be healed, but it made her even more nervous. Then Fleur went. She seemed smart, enchanting the dragon to sleep. Why didn't Hermione think of that for Harry? Her skirt was set on fire from a snore from the dragon but she retrieved the egg as well. Next was Krum, who also retrieved the egg. He used some spell to blind his dragon, however, they deducted points when the dragon stumbled around blindly and smashed a bunch of real eggs. Last was Harry.
Hermione would argue that his attempt was the most exciting of the lot. He did summon his broom, it worked flawlessly. That reassured Hermione and allowed her heart to stop beating so rapidly, but he still had to get the egg. He used his Quidditch seeker skills to out maneuver the dragon, she never wrapped her mind around how he pulled that off, and grabbed the egg with only a few small burns and cuts from the dragon's tail. Hermione didn't think it was real. Harry had just successfully stolen an egg from a dragon, and arguably did the best out of all four champions. He completed the task.
He was okay.