Chapter 5
FRIDAY 27TH JANUARY - Regulus
[Stranger]
(03:33) Stranger: Happy angel number time
(03:33) MysteryMan: Did you stay up so you could text me this?
(03:33) Stranger: Yup
(03:33) Stranger: You’re gonna have to wish that you win today’s match
(03:33) Stranger: Even though I don’t know how you’re on the team
(03:33) Stranger: Unless your lied abt smthg >:(
(03:34) MysteryMan: Didn’t lie about anything, Potter.
(03:34) Stranger: I’m still confuzzled
(03:34) MysteryMan: Confuzzled?
(03:34) Stranger: Yup
(03:34) Stranger: Can you give me another clue about yourself?
(03:34) MysteryMan: Lemme think
(03:34) MysteryMan: I have a brother in your year?
(03:35) Stranger: Adding it to the case file
(03:35) Stranger: Will you be coming to the Gryffindor party when we win?
(03:35) MysteryMan: No.
(03:35) MysteryMan: Will you come to Slytherin party when we win?
(03:35) Stranger: You asking me out Mystery Man?
(03:35) MysteryMan: No.
(03:35) Stranger: Shame
(03:36) Stranger: Would you go out with me if I asked?
(03:36) MysteryMan: I can’t transfigure myself into Evans, Potter.
(03:36) Stranger: I don’t like Lily
(03:37) MysteryMan: James Potter doesn’t have a crush on Lily Evans? Yes and I’m The Zodiac Killer.
(03:37) Stranger: No joke
(03:37) Stranger: Not click bait
(03:38) MysteryMan: You say that a lot, Potter.
(03:38) Stranger: Sorry
(03:38) MysteryMan: Don’t apologise, weirdo.
(03:38) MysteryMan: I don’t understand where you got it from.
(03:39) Stranger: Explain?
(03:39) MysteryMan: Well about 14% of our personality and behaviour is mirrored from others, usually someone you’re close with or look up to. It usually means that you either want to fit in with the person you’re mirroring, trying to gain someone’s trust, or to bond with the person that you’re mirroring. This isn’t usually a conscious decision but I’m some cases it can be.
(03:40) Stranger: Are Google or smthg
(03:40) MysteryMan: Just very interested in psychology, specifically criminology.
(03:40) MysteryMan: I practically live on the 16personalities website?
(03:40) Stranger: That is so cool oml
(03:41) MysteryMan: It’s really not. I look at a bunch of graphs and articles explaining human behaviour.
(03:41) Stranger: Like I said
(03:41) Stranger: Cool
(03:41) Stranger: Remember me when you’re an uber talented profiler or smthg
(03:41) MysteryMan: Remember me when you’re a really famous football player.
(03:42) Stranger: Literally couldn’t forget you
(03:42) Stranger: I’ll always think of the man who never told me his name so I couldn’t figure out who he is
(03:42) Stranger: Why we’re you up anyway
(03:42) MysteryMan: Football practice. We’ve booked the pitch for 4am, which is mad. I want to be the one to personally ground our captain into beef patties for us to eat for lunch.
(03:43) Stranger: Violent. I like it :O
(03:43) MysteryMan: U practicing this morning?
(03:43) Stranger: Fourth period we all plan to bunk off and practice through lunch
(03:43) Stranger: Say it’s an educational gathering
(03:43) Stranger: Really just an excuse to miss maths
(03:44) Stranger: And practice (not that we need it because we’re gonna win)
(03:44) MysteryMan: I see (you’re going to lose because we’re statistically better)
(03:44) Stranger: Wanna make this interesting
(03:44) MysteryMan: Money or information?
(03:44) Stranger: If we win (which we will) you give me your name. But if you win I’ll give you twenty quid?
(03:44) MysteryMan: Make it thirty and you’ve got yourself a deal (I’m gonna buy a cat)
(03:44) Stranger: Bet (Name the cat after me :))
(03:45) MysteryMan: I might. See you on the pitch, Potter.
(03:45) Stranger: Bye MysteryMan :))))))))))
————
[Not Fast Only Furious]
(08:34) Panda: Goof lukc fir tdoat !!!
(08:34) Pissface: Pan we’re literally in the same lesson as you and the match isn’t until 6pm
(08:34) Pussface: Shots fired
(08:34) Twat: I’m rooting for Dora.
(08:35) Pussface: @Pissface don’t stand a chance
(08:35) Dork: Nobody would roof for Evan anyways he always loses against her
(08:35) Pussface: And now Panda is stabbing Evan with a fountain pen in his hand
(08:36) Dork: I’d stop texting and help but Trelawny would give us all detention for talking
(08:36) Twat: But she doesn’t care about the student bleeding out in her classroom? Icon.
(08:36) Pissface: Ca see he ease
(08:37) Pussface: ???
(08:37) Panda: He can’t move his right hand :)
(08:37) Dork: Should we send her to an institution
(08:37) Pussface: Fuck no this is far too funny
(08:37) Pissface: Ate y a
(08:38) Pussface: Hate you too xxxxxxxxxxoxoxooxooxoxooxoxooxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxxooxoxoxxooxxooxxoooxxooxoxoxo
————
[Disappointment and Disappointed]
(09:40) Disappointed: Are you coming home for the summer?
(09:43) Disappointment: It’s literally January, Reggie
(09:43) Disappointment: Our dearest father will probs make me tho so yeah
(09:43) Disappointed: Ok.
(09:44) Disappointed: I need to tell you something.
(09:44) Disappointment: Over text or irl
(09:44) Disappointed: Text, I guess.
(09:44) Disappointed: I’m trans.
(09:45) Disappointment: Cool
(09:45) Disappointed: You don’t care?
(09:45) Disappointment: Fuck no
(09:45) Disappointment: I’m not our mother :D
(09:46) Disappointed: Ok. Don’t tell anyone please.
(09:46) Disappointment: I won’t, promise. Who else knows
(09:46) Disappointment: Or am I the first with the privilege?
(09:47) Disappointed: Dorcas, Pandora, Barty, Evan and some random guy that I’m friends with online.
(09:47) Disappointment: I’m offended
(09:47) Disappointment: No joke, not click bait. Literally.
(09:47) Disappointed: Ok. Bye.
(09:47) Disappointment: Thanks for telling me, Reggie.
(09:48) Disappointment: Wait do I still call you Reggie?
(09:48) Disappointed: If you want.
(09:48) Disappointed: Bye, Sirius.
(09:48) Disappointment: OML IVE GOT A BROTHER THATS SO COOL
(09:48) Disappointed: You’re so weird, Sirius.
(09:49) Disappointment: Whatever you say brother
————
[Stranger]
(17:12) Stranger: Good luck Mystery Man
(17:13) MysteryMan: You too, Potter.
————
[The IT Girls Of Gryffindor Tower]
(18:11) Maccies: Why is James so shit today.
(18:11) Lily: Good point actually
(18:11) Lily: What tf is he staring at?
(18:12) Maccies: He’s just looking at the Slytherin players and then the ground
(18:12) Loops: He’s tryna figure out who tf his crush is
(18:12) Lily: I am so confused by that statement
(18:12) Maccies: You and I both
(18:13) Loops: Legit same, he’s not the greatest at explaining
(18:13) Maccies: HOW TF DID HE JUST MISS THAT SHOT? JAMES FLEAMONT POTTER! IT WAS A CLEAR SHOT WTF!?
(18:13) Lily: We’re actually gonna lose
(18:13) Lily: James better be better soon
(18:14) Loops: Sirius and Marls are gonna be so insufferable to him if they lose
(18:14) Maccies: SO WILL I IM GONNA SMACK HIM WHEN HE GETS OFF THE PITCH
(18:14) Lily: Chill Pookie
(18:15) Loops: Today on best friends or dating
(18:15) Maccies: Best friends unfortunately :(
(18:15) Lily: Yeah not that I wouldn’t date a beautiful jellyfish as yourself
(18:15) Lily: But I’m spoken for
(18:15) Loops: Physically taken or mentally taken
(18:16) Lily: Mentally :(
(18:16) Loops: I get that
(18:16) Maccies: Big mood
————
(20:12) Loops: Oml Mary actually is smacking him
(20:12) Lily: Did you doubt her?
(20:12) Loops: Yes I did
(20:12) Loops: I never will again though
(20:14) Siriusly: I’m filming it don’t worry
(20:14) Lily: Never let him forget this moment
(20:14) Siriusly: Never will I make James Potter forget the moment that he was smacked on the head with Mary Macdonald’s copy of Hunger Games: Catching Fire when he said that the game went well
(20:14) Loops: No way he said that
(20:15) Lily: Bro was staring at the sky for the whole game
(20:15) Wanker: Was I just called Bro by Lily Evans?
(20:15) Wanker: Hurt is an understatement
(20:16) Pussyeater: Awh no he lives
(20:16) PettigrEW: How the actually fuck are you still alive
(20:16) PettigrEW: I just saw Mary beat the living shit out of you
(20:16) Wanker: That’s a mystery to us all
(20:16) Loops: How the fuck did you end up winning as well?
(20:17) Wanker: Because I’m an awesome striker?
(20:17) Pussyeater: That’s not it
(20:17) Siriusly: Not that
(20:17) Lily: Definitely not because of that
(20:17) Maccies: Nope
(20:17) Wanker: Explain then…
(20:18) Loops: OML I FUCKING KNOW
(20:18) Pussyeater: Explain Lupin.
(20:19) Loops: Nah this for James’ ears / eyes only
————
[James and Remus]
(20:20) Remus: You sure you don’t want to snog Reggie?
(20:20) James: No I don’t want to snog Sirius’ sister
(20:20) Remus: Because she kept STARING at you during the match
(20:21) Remus: Like STARING staring
(20:21) James: Remus my internet girl isn’t Reggie
(20:21) Remus: Is it a boy?
(20:21) James: Yes…
(20:22) Remus: Oh that makes so much sense
(20:22) James: Explain?
(20:22) Remus: Let’s just say being the deaf kid that people talk around because they think I can’t hear them is finally paying off
(20:23) James: I’d ask you to develop that answer but I already know you’re gonna say no
(20:23) Remus: I don’t spill people’s secrets Jamsie
(20:23) James: I’m gonna go and get the name of my internet boy
(20:24) Remus: Bet it on the game?
(20:24) James: Yeah luckily we didn’t lose otherwise I’d be out thirty quid
————
[MysteryMan]
*Stranger changed a name*
(20:26) Champion: I much prefer this name
(20:26) MysteryMan: You are so insufferable.
(20:27) Champion: Come on sugar plum
(20:27) Champion: Time for you to reveal your name
(20:27) MysteryMan: Regulus Arcturus.
(20:27) MysteryMan: How did you even win anyway, you kept looking at the sky. You missed like seventy shots.
(20:28) Champion: There’s nobody called Regulus is our school??
(20:28) MysteryMan: There is. I can see you at the moment.
(20:28) Champion: Are you a stalker? Or a Russian spy?
(20:29) MysteryMan: None of those, just a closeted transmasc.
(20:29) Champion: Ooh funsies!
(20:29) MysteryMan: You don’t care?
(20:29) Champion: Absolutely fucking not. You’re currently texting someone that last night had a full-on gay crisis
(20:30) MysteryMan: How Nick Nelson coded of you.
*MysteryMan changed a name*
(20:30) NickNelson: Who’s Nick Nelson?
(20:30) MysteryMan: That’s a hate crime. How can you not know who Nick Nelson is? He’s literally you (kind of)
(20:30) NickNelson: What’s you be going on abt?
(20:31) MysteryMan: Have you got Netflix in your dorm?
(20:31) NickNelson: Obviously? Who’d you take me as
(20:31) MysteryMan: Search up Heartstopper. Binge it all tonight. That’s an order.
(20:31) NickNelson: Eye eye Captain. Watching it now.
*NickNelson changed a name*
(20:32) Reg: I do not appreciate this bullying
(20:32) NickNelson: What do your mates call you then?
(20:33) Reg: Reg. Sometimes Twat or Lucy.
(20:33) NickNelson: I must find my own nickname for you then?
(20:33) NickNelson: Oh this guy just came up on the screen. I shall you name you after him.
(20:34) Reg: Please do not make my nickname after Charlie Spring.
(20:34) NickNelson: Fine :(
(20:34) NickNelson: You can stay Reg
(20:34) Reg: Fine.