Up To No Good
Remus is dreading the end of the week so much that he doesn’t end up finishing his presentation in time. He’d set himself up to finish it a week before it was due just for his own peace of mind, so he still has time to work on it, but still. Now he has to juggle the assignment, “the boys” and the consequences of whatever said boys get up too, all within the same week. It’s a little more on his plate then he’d like. And he has to deal with Lily in the aftermath of a very successful date. It’s not the worst thing in the world, but she has… a lot of energy, and right now, Remus could use a calming presence in his life.
That calming presence is nowhere to be found when he, Sirius, James, and Peter all cram into the study room in the basement of the library where James and Remus do their tutoring, which still occurs once weekly. The atmosphere in the room now, though, is drastically different now. James was never boring, of course, and Remus genuinely enjoyed their sessions, but he was never too much. This, though? This is too much.
James and Sirius on their own are at least semi-manageable (or at least James is, and Remus can ignore Sirius if he tries hard enough) but together, they are a force to be reckoned with. They become more then the sum of their parts, heir energy levels crescendoing in the presence of each other. Currently, they’re shadow boxing each other in the corner. A few hits actually end up landing, but they both just laugh them off. Peter never seems to directly involve himself, doesn’t throw any punches himself, but he certainly feeds the flames. Currently, he is acting as a sports narrator, describing every jab and miss with enthusiasm.
James lands a lucky, imaginary, hit to Sirius’ face. Sirius reacts theatrically, falling to the ground, a hand coming up to shield his eyes like a fainting maiden.
“And down goes black!” Peter shouts in his best announcer voice. “Another victory for the undefeated Potter!” James whoops, performing this whole victory dance for his imaginary audience. There are a couple god-awful hip thrusts thrown into the dance that Remus can’t help but laugh at. It’s not usually what he would call his sense of humor, but oh well. There are worse things to find funny.
James, once he’s done dancing, helps Sirius to his feet. Sirius, throughout this whole display, had been laying on the floor alternating between groans and fake sobs. He’s cheerful as ever once he’s back to standing, though, laughing along with James and Peter.
“Well then.” James says clapping his hands together. “Now that we’re all here…” He waves his hands towards the table, waggling his eyebrows excitedly. “Time to get to it?”
“Unfortunately.” Remus says as he takes his seat. The table in this room isn’t really big enough for four people, and their knees knock against each other underneath, elbows bumping up top. Sirius has kicked his feet up onto James lap, leaning back in his chair.
“First, we need to collect what we know.” James announces, effectively becoming the leader of the whole operation. He turns to Sirius. “What you got for me? What do you know about the enemy.”
“I’ve been doing some legwork, and they’ve got this whole routine, which makes things easy for us.” Remus is surprised that Sirius has done any thinking about this at all. But he’s somewhat pleased. At least that reduces their chances of getting into any trouble over this whole thing. “Pre-show, Rosier and Crouch get drinks while Reggie and Lovegood practice and set up, so that makes the two of them simple enough. Someone just has to distract them” he says this while pointing towards himself “while someone else” he waves generally towards the group, like this position is up for grabs “slips some of this into their drinks.” He pulls a bottle of Benadryl out of his bag, which is set beside him on the floor.
“And do you have epi-pens?” Remus interjects? “One for each of them?”
“I was getting to that.” Sirius replies, pulling three epi-pens out of his bag. “Reg isn’t allergic, so this will be plenty. I doubt any of them will need them though.”
Remus isn’t sure he wants to know where Sirius managed to scrounge up the pens, so he doesn’t ask. “How can you know that?” He asks instead.
“Well I think after living with someone for fifteen years you learn what their allergies are.”
James leans towards Remus and whispers conspiratorially to him, as though this is a big secret. “Reggie is his little brother.”
“Reggie is his brother… but not yours?” Remus asks, confused by this whole dynamic.
“It’s a long story.” James says.
“This time he’s not lying.” Sirius agrees. “Essentially, though, I moved out of my parents place at sixteen and Jame’s family took me in, so we’re basically siblings. Reggie stayed behind, so yes, he’s my brother, but him and James don’t have that same dynamic. Anyway, three pens will be more then enough. We just have to figure out how to drug Pandora and Reg now, which I was hoping you three would have some ideas about.”
“Ugh, don’t say it like that.” Remus groans.
“Say what like what?”
“That we’re drugging them. It makes this whole thin sound… awful.” It is awful, Remus thinks. Somehow, though, knowing that Sirius and Reggie are brothers makes it slightly more… palatable. This isn’t them attacking strangers. They know each other, have some sort of relationship and likely a precedence for things like this. And surely if something did go wrong, Reggie wouldn’t press charges against Sirius, right? Surely not.
“Well we’re doing exactly that, so…” Sirius shrugs, unbothered by the concept of drugging his own brother. Remus immediately pities the kid. Imagine having to grow up with Sirius Black for a big brother? Remus used to wish he had siblings, but now… now he’s not sure. “Moving on…” Sirius continues “Ideas, boys, we need ideas.”
Remus hopes that now that they’re all sober, the ideas will be a little more plausible then they were the other night.
And they are, somewhat, but Remus thinks that Lily was right, once again. Had Remus not been there to reign them in, they could have gotten themselves into some big trouble. Especially when James suggests that he gets into a flat out brawl with Reggie, allowing the others a chance to slip some Benadryl into their water bottles. Maybe James isn't so magic after all.