Chapter 8
“Okay, I have to stop at the Restricted Section before class,” Oliver says as he and his dormmates leave the common room. He had given Professor Flitwick his pass at the end of last year but he had been given another one by Professor Mcgonagall when he’d gotten back to school. She said that it wouldn’t expire so he could go in there whenever he wanted for the rest of his time at Hogwarts. Oliver told her that she wouldn’t regret it and she hoped he was right. He doesn’t know what James has done to McGonagall but she seems wary of him for some reason. Oliver usually just goes in the Restricted Section with Regulus when they need to study. One of the things McGonagall said when she gave the pass to Oliver was that he can bring his friends in there but they have to be with him. She said that he wouldn’t be able to leave them alone because the Restricted Section won’t open without the pass and the pass is spelled to work only for Oliver. Meaning, if Oliver isn’t present then the pass wouldn’t work.
“What for?” Regulus asks as they walk towards the library. It’s almost 8am which is when the library opens. Classes also normally start at 8:10am so they’re pushing it.
“Herbology,” Oliver says. “I am horrible at it and I was hoping to find a book that can help me.”
“Like a cheatsheet?” Evan asks.
Barty scoffs. “Why do you get to have help from Restricted Section books?”
“I said I’d let you use them,” Oliver reminds.
Barty scrunches his nose. “Ew, no. I’m allergic to school work. How could you even offer that?” He puts his hand over his chest. “I can’t believe you want to kill me.”
Oliver ignores him as they wait outside the library for it to open. They only have to wait two minutes but it’s the longest two minutes of Oliver’s life. They go in and Oliver greets Madam Pince before walking into the Restricted Section with his dormmates. “So what exactly are you looking for?” Evan asks as he looks around the room. There are a few rows of bookshelves in the Restricted Section. Oliver starts looking through them. Evan and Barty are looking around like they’ve never seen a book before in their lives. Oliver doesn’t doubt that they haven’t.
“What herbology books are so dangerous that they need to be in the restricted section?” Barty asks as he reaches up to touch a book.
“Don’t.” Regulus slaps his hand away.
Barty gasps. “Dick!”
Regulus rolls his eyes and points at the book. “Care of Magical Creatures.”
“So?”
“So it’ll bite your fingers off,” Regulus tells him. Oliver ignores them as Regulus goes on to babysit the two who know nothing about the library and how to behave inside it. He finds the book he’s looking for. It’s about venomous plants which is what they’re working on at the moment. He puts it into his bag and goes back to his friends. Barty’s on the floor, Regulus is pinching the bridge of his nose and Evan’s clutching his stomach while laughing.
“What happened?” Oliver asks. “Why is Barty on the floor?”
Regulus sighs and drops his arms. “He touched the book.”
“I have to go to Madam Pomfrey,” Barty cries, clutching his hand to his chest.
Oliver stares at him for a moment before laughing. “Alright, alright.” He walks over to Barty and helps him stand up. “I’ll take you to Madam Pomfrey.”
“We’ll go with you,” Regulus says.
Oliver shakes his head. “No. Classes will be starting soon and you don’t need to give your parents a reason to be dicks.” Regulus opens his mouth to protest but Oliver shakes his head. “Reg. Just go.”
“I’ll go with you,” Evan says. He holds out his hand and Regulus looks down at it. Evan wiggles his fingers. “You’re meant to take it.”
“Evan-” Oliver starts, trying to remind Evan that Regulus doesn’t like touch and he shouldn’t push him but Regulus takes Evan’s hand. He holds Evan’s hand. Regulus holds Evan’s hand. It’s strange. It’s unheard of. And Evan doesn’t even react, he just pulls Regulus out of the restricted section.
“Did you see that?” Barty asks.
Oliver stares at the door. “Yeah.” Him and Barty look at each other. “I think we’re going insane.”
“Crazy,” Barty agrees.
“Bonkers,” Oliver says solemnly. He and Barty grin at each other. “Come on, let’s get your hand looked at.”
Barty’s hand is going to be fine but they get to Potions late and Slughorn gives them detention. It’s ridiculous but predictable. Barty and Oliver sit down at a bench next to Regulus and Evan. “What’d we miss?” Oliver asks as he slings his bag over the back of his chair.
“You can look at my notes,” Regulus says. Oliver thanks him and pays attention to Slughorn as he starts to talk. Oliver pays attention and writes down some notes.
“We’re going to be brewing wideye potion in pairs which will be assigned by me,” Slughorn announces. “The people I’ve paired you with are not up for discussion, you will be with the person I have partnered you with and that’s that.”
“What’s he defensive about?” Oliver whispers to Regulus who shrugs.
Slughorn goes on to list people off, most of them groaning about not being paired with their friends. Oliver’s starting to notice that no one is being put with their friends. He’s a bit worried that he won’t be put with his. What if they don’t? Regulus barely tolerates his friends being in his space, let alone people he doesn’t know. “Barty Crouch Jr with Evan Rosier,” Slughorn announces and Barty turns to Evan with a grin to which Evan rolls his eyes. Oliver relaxes slightly. Evan and Barty got put together, that means that whomever Oliver is paired with (please be Regulus, please be Regulus) can’t be that bad. “Oliver Potter and Gabrielle Antić.” Fuuuucccckkkk. Oliver holds back his groan. It’s not only that Gabrielle Antić isn’t Regulus but she’s a Slytherin and one of the people being mean to Oliver about how he’s a “Blood Traitor”. “Carina Moore and Regulus Black.” That is less than ideal but Carina isn’t a bad person. She’s a Hufflepuff and never even hinted towards Oliver and his friends of any bad blood.
Oliver and Regulus look at each other before Oliver stands and goes over to sit next to Antić. He watches as Carina sits down next to Regulus. Regulus has moved slightly away from the other chair at his station so he’s closer to Evan and Barty. “Ugh, Professor?” Antić scoffs. She’s obviously grossed out. Oliver looks over at her and she glares at him like how dare he even look at her?
Slughorn turns to her. “Yes, Miss Antić?”
“Can you put him somewhere else?” she asks. “I don’t want to be sitting anywhere near a Blood Traitor.”
Oliver side-eyes her. Did she just openly call him a Blood Traitor in front of a teacher? She must really not like him. Slughorn clears his throat. “Don’t use that kind of language towards a fellow student. Or anyone, for that matter. Five points from Slytherin.”
Antić scoffs. “Whatever. At least put me with someone else.”
Slughorn sighs. “I have put you in a pair with Mr. Potter for a reason-”
“Switch me!” Antić yells, slamming her hands down against the workbench.
Oliver leans away from her. He turns to Slughorn. “I can switch partners, Professor. It isn’t an issue.”
“See!” Antić leans back in her seat. “He hates me as much as I hate him.”
“I don’t hate you,” Oliver mumbles as he packs up his things again. “I don’t hate anyone.” It’s true. He sort of hates that he doesn’t hate anyone.
“Filthy Blood,” Antić sneers as Oliver walks away from the table. Oliver chooses to ignore her.
“I can only let you switch if someone else is willing to work with Miss Antić,” Slughorn says.
“I’ll work with her,” Carina Moore offers as she starts to pack her own things up. The relief in Regulus’ eyes makes Oliver’s stomach twist. He’s glad Regulus is happy to have him around but Moore isn’t always going to be there to let them be partners. What happens if they’re separated and Regulus is made to work nowhere near anyone he knows? Oliver doesn’t even want to imagine it.
“Thank you, Miss Moore,” Slughorn says. Oliver sits back down next to Regulus and Moore goes off to work with Antić . Antić doesn’t seem all that happy to be working with Moore but she seems more inclined to work with her than she was to work with Oliver. “Now, let’s begin, shall we?”
Regulus nudges Oliver’s knee with his and Oliver smiles down at his potions book. “I’m glad I can work with you,” Regulus whispers. Oliver turns to look at him, the smile never leaving his face.
“I’m glad I’m working with you too.”
Gabrielle Antić is a massive bitch. Oliver limps into the Hospital Wing with a split lip, a swollen eye that’s bound to bruise, at least a few bruised ribs and most likely a dislocated knee. Madam Pomfrey sees him and sighs. “Again?” She walks over and guides him to the same bed she’s put him in every time he’s admitted into the Hospital Wing.
Oliver grumbles and Madam Pomfrey pushes his hair out of his face. It’s getting long now and it’s gradually getting less curly as he grows up. James is the opposite. Oliver swears that man has curlier hair every year. Pomfrey takes out her wand and waves it over Oliver’s face. He closes his eyes and breathes out. His wounds sting as they close. The bruises on his arms and legs are tended to and his knee is popped back into place. Pomfrey hands him a potion to help with the swelling and the pain and Oliver gladly takes it. He leans back against the pillows as Madam Pomfrey sits down on the edge of his bed.
“What happened?” she asks softly.
Oliver shrugs, his eyes falling closed. “Dunno.”
Madam Pomfrey sighs. “Oliver, you need to stop doing this. I know you know who hurts you and you have to tell me.”
Oliver shakes his head. “They’ll get in trouble.”
“You’re being abused,” Madam Pomfrey tells him. She puts a hand on his leg and he looks at her. She looks tired and sad. “Who was it, dear?”
Oliver frowns. “It isn’t usually the same person,” he says. He picks at the skin around his fingers. “Today it was Gabrielle Antić.”
“Your year, Slytherin, yes?” Madam Pomfrey asks and Oliver nods. “Hm.” She smiles. “Thank you, Mr. Potter.” Oliver nods and Madam Pomfrey hands him a bottle. “Sleeping draught,” she tells him. “You need your rest.” Oliver takes it and lies back. As soon as his eyes are closed, he’s knocked out. He doesn’t wake until the next morning and James is sitting next to his bed.
James is sleeping but wakes when Oliver sits up. His eyes dart around the room and when they land on Oliver, his expression softens. “Hey you.”
“Hi,” Oliver whispers. “What’re you doing here?”
“Moony,” is all James says.
“Bad full?” Oliver asks.
James shrugs. “As bad as they are. It’s been a lot worse but he isn’t in great shape.”
Oliver hums. “Is he going to be okay?”
“Yeah,” James nods. He shifts in his seat. “How are you? Poppy refused to tell me why you were in here.”
Oliver picks at the skin around his fingers and winces when his skin splits. “It’s nothing,” he tells James. “Really, I’m just clumsy.”
James frowns. “You promised me you’d tell me if anyone was giving you trouble.” He leans forwards. “Is it your roommates?” Oliver groans and falls back against his pillows. “I know they can be-”
“You know nothing about them!” Oliver yells. “I am sick of having the same conversation with you over and over again, James. They would never hurt me. They don’t even know! They’d do anything to protect me and I don’t want other people to get hurt because of me.”
James just sits there, dumbstruck because Oliver has never raised his voice at him before. “Ollie-”
“No,” Oliver says firmly. “I will not let you paint them to be such horrible people. They’re good, James and it isn’t their fault that you can’t see that.”
James is quiet for a moment. “Ollie, I was only asking-”
“But you’ve already asked,” Oliver cuts in, exasperated. “I have told you that they would never do that and yet you still refuse to believe me.”
“I’m only trying to look out for you,” James says. “You're my brother.”
“I never asked you to do that,” Oliver says. “You may be my brother but you’re not a complete ray of sunshine.”
“What is that supposed to mean,” James asks, his back straightening.
“I know about the things you do to Severus,” Oliver says. He crosses his arms over his chest. “I’ve seen what you put Lily through when you bully her best friend.”
“I am not a bully,” James tells him. He looks distraught over the fact that Oliver would ever say he was.
“Really? Because I’m sure Severus would disagree,” Oliver says. “You judge all the people in Slytherin before you’ve even met them and you put them in little boxes. They can’t improve if you don’t give them room to, James.”
“I don’t-”
“I’m done with this conversation,” Oliver says. “Get out.”
“What?” James whispers, unable to speak louder.
“I want you to leave me alone,” Oliver tells him. James doesn’t fight it anymore. He gets up but hesitates. He turns to look at Oliver but Oliver looks away. James sighs.
“Mum and Dad sent you a letter,” James says. “I left it on the table next to your bed. Hope you get better soon.” He leaves and Oliver sighs. He leans back against his pillow with his face in his hands.
After James’ visit, Oliver tells Madam Pomfrey he isn’t feeling very well so she makes him stay in the Hospital Wing instead of going to his classes. Remus also isn’t allowed to go to his classes so the two of them play Wizard’s Chess. Remus hadn’t played a whole lot because his mother is a muggle and his father, who is a wizard, left when he was little. However, Peter really likes Wizard’s Chess and he has taught Remus how to play because both James and Sirius don’t like it. Oliver spends almost the whole day sitting on Remus’ bed while the two of them play chess and exploding snap.
By the time they had to leave, Oliver didn’t want to go. Remus, however, wanted to get out of there as soon as he could. He’s usually only held in the Hospital Wing for a day before he’s let out after a full moon but sometimes he’s held up there for two days.
Remus and Oliver spend a lot of time together in the Hospital Wing no matter how extremely different the two of their injuries are. Madam Pomfrey’s disappointed every time Oliver walks into her infirmary but she tends to Oliver’s wounds with gentle hands either way. His dormmates are still in the dark about his injuries. It gets to the point that the injuries Oliver has sustained aren’t anywhere that shows— for example, some fifth year Slytherin punched Oliver in the stomach but didn’t get any of his ribs. It only shows as a bruise which he can hide. Also when people use hexes they don’t show on his skin so it’s easy to pretend it never happened.
The year goes by and Oliver hates to admit it but he’s been ignoring his brother. Some part of Oliver knows that James is only looking after him like their parents want but another part just wants James to realise that his friends don’t want to hurt him. Regulus would rather die than hurt him, Evan may on accident but he’d apologise until the end of time, Barty would make jokes that could maybe hurt him but he’d never ever even think about doing it on purpose, Pandora would rather die than hurt anyone and Dorcas would probably punch herself in the face if she were to ever hurt him.
Third year ends quicker than he thought it would. These past three years have been so quick Oliver swears he has whiplash. Unlike Christmas, Walburga and Orion don’t let Sirius stay with the Potters for the Summer Holidays. It makes James and Peter sad. Remus can’t stay for the Summer Holidays either because his mum, Hope, wants to see him over the holidays. She’s okay with him going to stay with his friends over Christmas because she usually has to work during that time but she wants to spend time with her son at least once during the year.
Oliver misses his friends. He always misses his friends. James should consider himself lucky because he can at least spend some time with his friends outside of Hogwarts. Oliver can’t see any of his friends when he isn’t at Hogwarts, during any holidays. It upsets him. However, Oliver gets to hang out with his dad, which he’s missed. He needed his dad more than he thought he did.
“So, do you want to tell me about what’s going on between you and your brother?” Monty asks. Oliver looks up from the cauldron in front of him. James and Peter went out with Effie to meet Remus and Hope in town while Oliver stayed back with Monty. Also, James never asked him to come. He used to always do that.
“I don’t know what you mean,” Oliver says.
Monty gives him a look. “Ollie, I have known you your whole life. I know when you’re happy, I know when you’re sad and I know when you’re ignoring your brother. What happened?”
Oliver sighs. He slumps down in his chair. “He keeps thinking that my friends are hurting me when they would never do that. I’ve told James over and over again that they would never do anything like that and he refuses to think any differently about them because they’re Slytherins.”
“Hurting you? Why would he think they’re hurting you?” Monty asks.
Oliver tenses. Fuck. He hasn’t told his parents about his injuries and by the sound of it, Madam Pomfrey never contacted his parents. “Just his paranoia.”
“Oliver…” Monty crosses his arms and Oliver sinks down further in his chair. “What’s been going on, mi hijo?”
“Nothing,” Oliver tells him but Monty doesn’t look very convinced. He sighs. “I may or may be being bullied.” Monty raises his eyebrows. “Physically.”
“What?” Monty’s arms fall and Oliver winces.
“What?” He shoots back at Monty. “It’s not that bad-”
“Why haven’t you told someone?” Monty asks. Oliver sinks down again and Monty sighs. He reaches over to take his son’s hand. “Ollie, you have to tell someone. Explain it to James.” Oliver scoffs. “He’ll understand,” Monty assures him. “He will and you know it. He’ll protect you.”
“But what if I don’t want his protection?” Oliver huffs. “I don’t need him to protect me.”
“But he wants to,” Monty tells him. “You're his little brother.”
“I’m not a little kid anymore, Dad,” Oliver says. “I’m fourteen.”
“Oliver.” Monty squeezes his hand. “You will always be James’ little brother, just like you'll always be my little boy. He’ll always want to protect you and strive to do so. Do you remember his first year at Hogwarts?” Oliver frowns but nods. He remembers how awful it was. He missed his brother so much and all he could think about for the whole year was that he couldn’t wait for his brother to get home.
“Oh,” Oliver whispers. He sees what his father is doing. He’s trying to remind Oliver what life without his brother was like. He fiddles with his fingers. “I suppose I had forgotten about that.”
“I know,” Monty says. “It’s okay to forget those things but it isn’t okay to not be able to remember. You love your brother and you need him. Without him you’d be miserable and I have seen how miserable you’ve been without him.”
Oliver laughs bitterly. “Oh Dad, you have no idea.” He shakes his head. “I may need him but he’s proven that he doesn’t need me.”
“Oliver-” Monty tries but Oliver’s not finished.
“He doesn’t seem as sad as you make him out to be. I know I need him, Dad, I’ve always known that but he doesn’t need me. I’ll always be his little brother but I’m not his only brother. He has Sirius who needs him more than I need him. Sirius, who lives in that stupid house with those stupid people. Regulus needs someone too, Dad, and if Sirius isn't going to be there for him then I will. Regulus needs his brother like I need mine but both of them are too idiotic to realise that we need them, so all we have is each other. They’re too caught up in each other that they haven’t been acting much like brothers to us.” Oliver lets go of Monty’s hand so he can stand up. He goes over to the corner of the room where his book bag is, the one he uses for school. He had brought it into his father’s potions lab to go over the notes he had written down and any advice Monty could give. Oliver takes a notebook. It mostly has scribbled in poems (Regulus has gotten him invested in them) but on one of the pages are tally marks. Oliver takes the book over to Monty.
“What’s this?” Monty asks as he runs his pointer finger over the ink and the indents where Oliver’s quill has pressed too hard into the paper.
Oliver points to the lines he’s done for third year. “That is the amount of times James has called me with the mirrors last year.” He points to the ones in the section above it. “That’s the amount of times in second year, and the ones above it are in first. Look at it and tell me I’m wrong.” Monty looks down at the tallies but they both know that there’s nothing he can say to change Oliver’s mind. The evidence is all there. James has contacted him with the mirror twenty-seven times in third year. In first year, James had contacted him two hundred and forty-six times. Two years ago, when James still cared about him. Because he doesn’t anymore. James doesn’t care about Oliver when Sirius is there. Sirius needs him. James has forgotten that Oliver needs him too. Needs him desperately.