Conduction

Regulus Black has never liked James Potter. Ever since Sirius had come back home for Christmas in his first year of Hogwarts all he had heard from his brother was all the adventures he and his new friends had been on. He would always talk about how much better Hogwarts is compared to Grimmauld Place. When Sirius talked about Potter he would always say 'he's like a brother to me', not even considering the impact those words had on him.

It is the start of his fifth year at Hogwarts and Sirius has been at Potter Manor ever since Christmas, because of this mother has been extra invasive of my privacy and is constantly saying 'you are now the new heir of the noble and most ancient house of black, not that we expect you to fail us but we can not have the same mistake made twice'. He just couldn't take it anymore, lucky for him he can finally escape his parent's grasp and set off to Hogwarts.

"Regulus!" his mother was calling from downstairs. She hated whenever someone was late even though she always made us late to events because she was too busy making sure she looked 'good'. Not that she even knew what good meant when it came to appearance, or anything really. 

He had already put his uniform on because he just can't stand changing on the train, there's always students crowding the aisle in hurry to get their robes on before the train comes to a stop.

"Regulus!!! Don't make me wait any longer, you know what I'll do!" She called again.

He did, she'd not give him food the week he got back. Not that this was much of a problem for him. He had been struggling with eating recently and would not be able to finish the food prepared for him, this always ended with him getting yelled at. It didn't matter what he did because both options would get him in trouble.

Not wanting to hear her scream his name once more he rushed down the stairs to see that his mother and Kreacher were waiting by the door along with the things he'll be taking with him.

"I knew I could trust you to make it down on time, this is why I always liked you best." she said with a smirk.

It was obvious that she was saying that he was much better than Sirius, but he didn't see it that way. All he did was try not to make his parent's mad, yes Sirius purposely tried to anger them but that didn't make him a worse child than Regulus.

Despite what everyone thinks, Regulus does not hate his brother. If anything he admires him for standing up for himself. Of course he wants to leave as well but he doubts he'd have anywhere to go and besides if he left there would be no heir and his parent's would be even more furious than they were with Sirius.

As soon as he arrived at the platform he said a quick goodbye to his mother and rushed to get onto the train before someone took the compartment he and his friend always sat in. Even though he was early there were still many students already on the train rushing around to meet up with their friends.When he caught sight of his compartment he came to a stop and as he opened the door he was ambushed with a hug from his friend, Pandora.

"Regulus!" She shouted excitedly. "I've missed you, I wish you would've hung out with us during the summer."

His mother would never allow him to see his friend during summer unless they happened to be hosting an event they were all invited to. Sadly that meant he hadn't had the chance to see Pandora at all because his parents didn't want him associating with anyone other than Slytherins, and Pandora is a Ravenclaw.

"I've missed you too." he replied. Regulus was often lonely in his home, with only his family for company. Not that he even bothered trying to spend time with them, he only did when he was forced to.

"Barty and Evan should be here soon." she said with a smile on her face. A smile that was only on her face when talking about her friends.

"What about Dorcas?"

“She sent me a letter saying that she is gonna be in the same compartment as Marlene." Marlene McKinnon, Dorcas' girlfriend. She is on the Gryffindor quidditch team and quite a good beater. He's never had a problem with her except for the fact that she's friends with his brother. This meant that their groups will start to collide and it will be more difficult to avoid speaking to Sirius. It would be nice to have a conversation with him as it has been so long, but he can't bring himself to initiate it. His brother probably hates him anyway so there's no point in trying.

He was about to respond when suddenly the door of the compartment slammed open. At that moment Regulus knew exactly who had arrived.

"We’re back!" Barty shouted. Evan stood beside him rolling his eyes at Barty's over exaggerated entrance.

Regulus covered his face with his hands while shaking his head, hoping no one else heard that. They probably did though.

"Hey Reg, it's been a while." Evan said calmly. Usually Regulus would scold his friends for giving him nicknames but since he hadn't seen them over summer he decided to let them off the hook.

"Reggie, still looking as cute as ever I see." Barty said with a smirk as he winked towards Regulus.

"Don't call me cute." he snapped. The nicknames were starting to grow on him but being called cute, pretty, adorable or anything of the sort, that angered him.

"Awww, you’re so cute when you're angry." Barty continued on.

"Am not!"

"Yes you are!"

"Barty stop teasing Regulus." Pandora lectured Barty, making Evan start uncontrollably laughing.

"Stop laughing at me, Evan" Bary said, embarrassed.

Soon Regulus and Pandora both joined Evan laughing at Barty.

"Merlin, I feel so betrayed right now" Barty said while crossing his arms trying to look intimidating. He was not.

Times like these always put Regulus in a better mood. Just knowing he can be himself around his friends and ignore all the problems he's had to face at home made him feel happy in a way he has never been before.

After getting off the train and making his way up to Hogwarts, everyone began taking their seats in the great hall preparing for the first years to lay their eyes on Hogwarts for the first time. He sat with Barty, Evan and Dorcas. Pandora was sitting with some of her Ravenclaw friends, it's a shame that she's not in the same house as the rest of us because if she was she'd be in our classes.

As expected the first years wandered through the gates to the great hall in awe. Most of them looked nervous, while some looked like they had known this was coming. From Regulus' own experience seeing the great hall for the first time didn't faze him at all. Sirius said this was because he is like a statue silent and composed. Sorting felt like it took longer each year it happened, and Dumbledore's speech was the same as ever. Once all of that was over the tables began to fill up with food. Way too much in Regulus' opinion, there was always leftovers.

Eventually the hall filled with people's voices as they caught up with their friends and talked about what they got up to for summer. Around him student's were filling up their plates with as much food as they could manage but all Regulus could do was stare down at the food while messing with the edge of his robe's sleeves. He was hungry but everything felt like it would be too much. Just thinking about eating anything was making him feel sick.

Regulus looked up a bit because he didn't want anyone to see him like this. As he slowly tilted his head up he made eye contact with Sirius. This made him nervous. Was he supposed to look away? His brother had a hint of worry on his face. Sirius couldn't be worried about him, it had to be something else. Luckily for him though his friends had started talking to him giving him an excuse to look away.

While they were talking to him he put a small amount of food on his plate and hesitatingly began to eat. Eating did not help him feel better at all so he made sure to drink water from his goblet after every bite.

"Regulus are you alright, it looks like something is bothering you?" Dorcas asked him. He knew she was just concerned but Regulus didn't want to share what was wrong with the group. He didn't want them to try and solve the problem.

He hated feeling like there was something wrong with him.

Or that he needed fixing.

"Yeah are you okay, you haven't been eating much." Evan added.

"I'm fine, I'm just not hungry." Regulus said before downing the rest of his drink. He hated lying to his friend. It made him feel guilty.

"Well as long as you make up for it at breakfast tomorrow morning I guess it's fine." Barty said in a way that brought the attention off of Regulus. He was thankful for that.

"I will." Regulus responded.

Dinner was finally over. It felt much longer than usual. All of the Slytherins including Regulus made their way down to the dungeons and were given the new password.

Regulus went straight to his room, which he shared with Barty and Evan. He unpacked his stuff and went to sleep.He has asked Evan to wake him up in an hour because he wanted to take a walk around the castle to try and clear his mind.

An Hour Later

Regulus woke up to Barty shaking him aggressively. This is exactly why he had asked Evan and not Barty to wake him up.

"Why are you waking me up? I asked Evan because I knew you would do this."

"Evan tried to wake you up by shouting your name but you didn't even move so he asked me to try." Barty said this with a smirk which did not help one bit.

Regulus chose to ignore what Barty said and fix his hair that had become messy from sleeping.

Once that was done he walked to the main area of the common room and saw Evan playing chess with another slytherin whose name he had forgotten.

"I can't believe you let Barty wake me up"

"It's not my fault you were sound asleep."

Regulus chose to just forget about it and left the common room.

While he walked through the halls of Hogwarts Regulus thought about all the memories he'd had here. It had been hard ever since Sirius left home but just being at Hogwarts surrounded by other students and his friend made him feel so much better. It was as if all his problems had gone away. All except one.

Regulus is still not sure what is going on with him. Why has he been feeling sick recently? Why is it affecting his eating? Is it because he's worried? No, it can't be. He's at the one place where everything is fine. He's probably just overreacting.

Everything will be fine

Suddenly he heard footsteps causing him to stop in his tracks. Its not curfew yet why would anyone be sneaking around? Whoever it is must be watching him, he's the only person here, everyone else probably went to sleep early to prepare for classes tomorrow.

He continued walking with caution.

As he turned the corner he came face to face with none other than his brother.

"Oh hi Regulus, what are you doing out at this time." His brother said, obviously embarrassed that he got caught.

"It's not curfew so it's perfectly fine for me to be here, why were you following me? Regulus asked.

"What I wasn't following you, I am allowed out too you know." Sirius responded. That was such an obvious lie. Did Sirius really think he'd believe that.

"You're a terrible liar, it's obvious that you're up to something, if you weren't there would be no reason for you to lie."

“I can’t believe my own brother would accuse me of such a thing!”

“Well I’m not wrong.”

“Well—”

He doesn’t have time for Sirius’ nonsense. If Sirius isn’t going to admit to following him then he’s wasting his time.

Regulus turns to leave but something stops him.

Sirius has his hand around his arm pulling him closer.

“Regulus, wait I need to talk to you!” Sirius says.

“What can be so important that you have to go out of your way to follow me.” He has a feeling this might be to do with what happened at dinner. “Where are your friends anyway, I thought that where one of you goes you all go.”

Regulus is honestly surprised that Sirius followed him alone.

“Firstly, my friends do know I’m here and that I’m with you.” Of Course they know. “Secondly, I know that you hate me but I’m still your brother and am allowed to speak to you. It’s not like I’ll be sent to Azkaban because I want to see you.”

Did Sirius just admit that he wants to see him? He’s probably lying. Him and his friends are always pulling stupid shit just for the sake of it.

“What do you want, Sirius.” There's no point dragging this interaction on.Sirius will just say what he wants and then Regulus can finally leave.

“I’m worried about you.” Sirius says in a soft tone.

“Why would you be worried about me? Is it because I haven’t left home? Is it because I don’t have you?” Regulus snaps causing his brother to flinch. “Well guess what Sirius, I don’t need you anymore and I never will.”

“Fuck you, Reg!” Sirius shouts. He was definitely struggling to keep it together.

“If you're just going to shout at me then I’m leaving.”

Regulus once again turns to leave, but this time no one stops him.

There's no point continuing his walk, Sirius has just completely ruined the mood.

Not like it would be the first time Sirius had done this.