the black dog

Present – 7th May 1983
Regulus’ POV

“Keep it kid friendly please,” Remus groaned as they all sat around the couch Regulus and Lily were on. He really didn’t want the relationship between two of his friends to be explained to him with sexual details. Just the thought made him shudder.

“Speak for yourself!” Barty scoffed. “I want all the nitty gritty details. Give it to me like one of Lily’s porn books.”

“My books are not porn!” Lily gasped, her cheeks turning red.

“What else do you call explicit sex scenes on paper?” Evan joined in, a teasing smirk on his face.

“Romance? Sex scenes on paper?” Regulus rolled his eyes, earning a grateful look from Lily.

He was honestly thankful for Barty’s idiotic behaviour, by doing so he momentarily moved the conversation away from Regulus’ past. And the truth was, Regulus needed those few seconds where the attention was away from him to gather his thoughts. He was really doing this. He was finally telling his friends about his past. His brain was scattered all over the place since last night, he hadn’t even given his brain time to process the events. He had locked himself away and let himself drown inside his head; his brain barely stringing a single thought together. It may have been a result of the pain in his hand, or the shock of seeing his brother and… again. His thoughts trailed off.

“‘Porn books’ sounds better,” Barty replied with a shrug.

“I should never have told you about my books,” Lily scowled, all embarrassment vanishing from her face.

“There’s nothing to be ashamed of Lily,” Evan reassured her with a hint of amusement in his voice.

“You two are menaces! I don’t know how Regulus has put up with you all of these years!” She frowned, pointing a finder in both of their faces. “No wonder you two weren’t caught up on Regulus’ love life.”

“Hey!” Evan and Barty said simultaneously.

“We knew he had a crush on James,” Barty continued, glaring in Lily’s direction. “It was pretty fucking obvious.”

“Once Reg started disappearing in our later years we just assumed he moved on to someone else… we never thought that…” Evan trailed off with a wince in Regulus’ direction.

Regulus gave a small shrug, ignoring the thoughts that threatened to overtake his mind. “Yeah, me neither. Maybe I should have told you so you could have talked me out of it.”

“We are all here to listen now,” Lily said reassuringly.

The group fell silent, all eyes on Regulus and the words that they were expecting to fall out of his mouth. He took a deep breath, “It started with a letter. A letter no one was meant to see.”

“A letter for James?” Remus asked.

“No,” he paused briefly. “It was for my brother. It was for Sirius.”

Flashback – 4th February 1976

“Where is it?” Regulus said frantically, rummaging through the pages of his book for the parchment. “Where the fuck did it go?”

Nonononono. This couldn’t be happening. It was in one of these books. It had to be.

But no matter how hard he looked he could not find the letter that he was sure he placed between a page of one of these books. He didn’t want to disrespect the books he had borrowed from the library but he was so close to ripping the pages apart until he found this letter.

He was so tired last night, staying up in the library until the librarian kicked him out because of curfew. In his rush, he had gathered up most of the books and checked them out, one of which he was sure he had slipped the letter into. It seemed that Regulus might have left the wrong books behind—one which contained a little piece of his soul between the pages.

Fuck.

The books were fortunately—or unfortunately—charmed to return to the shelves in the middle of the night, a magic aid that meant the librarian didn’t need to spend time replacing every book that was left out by a student. It was laziness if you asked Regulus. However, he had a massive pile of books last night and was growing anxious at the idea of locating each of them and flipping through them.

The reason he wanted to find the letter so badly was so he could burn it, and along with it his feelings. The only thing that gave him solace was that he left the letter anonymous. His fear would be at a whole different level if it wasn’t anonymous. He couldn’t even stomach the thought. He might have drowned himself in the Black Lake if that happened and someone found it.

Eventually, he gave up looking through the few books he had brought back with him from the library. He was angry with himself. It hadn’t even crossed his mind to look for the letter until the afternoon, well after he had departed the library last night. Merlin. The amount of students that would have visited the library throughout the day. All Regulus could do was pray that he did not leave the letter in a commonly used book and he was able to find the letter and dispose of it how he intended to.

Regulus didn’t think he had moved through the corridors of Hogwarts as fast as he did as he weaved through the crowds of students towards the library. He moved as if every second of time wasted was another second where someone could find the letter. If it hadn’t happened already.

He was barely out of breath by the time he reached the library—he had Quidditch to thank for that. He immediately ran to the potions sections, ignoring the glares of other students in his direction. Fuck them, honestly. And Regulus—the little shit that he was—flipped them off once their heads had returned to their books.

He pulled out every Potions book that he recognised as something he had looked at the entire time he had been at Hogwarts. One by one he pulled a book out, holding it by both the front and back cover as he flipped it over and shook. It hurt him to treat the books this way but it felt like a matter of life or death. Regulus wasn’t sure he would recover until the letter was back in his possession, lit up in flames like a phoenix in its final death. However, he wasn’t a complete monster towards the books—the older and more fragile looking books he had the decently to treat with more care, flipping through the pages quickly instead of breaking their spines.

Eventually, he breathed a sigh of relief as he flipped over a book—Moste Potente Potions by Phineas Bourne—and a familiar piece of paper fluttered to the floor. He quickly returned the book to the shelf and picked up the piece of parchment, eyes scanning to confirm that this was what he was looking for and not a loose page or notes left by another student.

His heart rate slowed down as he recognised the looping swirls of his own handwriting. Thank Merlin.

Or well he had thanked Merlin until he flipped the parchment over and that sinking feeling returned in his stomach. Written on the very bottom of the page in terrible handwriting—it was almost illegible—was:

This is truly a heartfelt letter. Why leave it in a potions book of all places? Is it bad and personal that I want to read more?

Regulus wanted to scream. Someone had read his letter. Someone was walking around Hogwarts who had looked at a glimpse into the darkest and most depressing parts of Regulus’ brain. It didn’t matter that they had no clue it belonged to him—in a way he felt violated. Ripped open. Like his soul was laid bare for someone to pick at.

Then his emotions twisted into something that could only be described as anger or outrage. Reading the letter was one thing but actually taking the time to grab a quill and mark the paper with your own thoughts was a different level of invasive. Who the fuck does something like that?

In his rage, he folded the letter up in four and shoved it into the pockets of his robes. He then stalked towards a group of second-year Ravenclaws who were sitting together at one of the tables nearby. The group looked at him with a mixture of fear and shock as he held out his hand in expectation.

“I need a piece of parchment and a quill.”

A boy immediately placed his quill and a blank piece of paper in Regulus’ hand with no hesitation. A benefit of being a Slytherin and a member of the Noble House of Black with a cold exterior.

He walked over to a free table, leaning on the counter as he scribbled a response to the message. It was a furious scribble, he was surprised when the quill didn’t break from the grip he had on it. He stalked back to the grip and returned the quill to the boy with a forced “Thank you.”

His eyes ran over the note he had written, a clear message to the person who had defaced his letter:

Learn to mind your own business. Yes, you are a terrible human being for requesting that. My feelings are not owed to you. Fuck off.

Did he need to add the last two words? No. Did it feel good for him to do so? Yes. He didn’t care if this person ever saw this, it would make the world a better place if anyone found this letter. A lesson for people to not snoop in other people’s business. He pulled Bourne’s book out again and shoved the letter in between the pages, returning it to the shelf before running off without a second thought.

He returned to his dorm in a state of fury. Yet, he could not find it in him to burn the letter. Instead, he shoved it in the depths of his trunk. It would burn one day.

He found himself in the library the following night after leaving the response to the note. He was back in the same section that he had spent in that last week. The one with all the Potions books nearby.

His eyes kept drifting further into the section, towards where he could find that book. It was like there was an invisible string connecting him to this book in particular. He found himself subconsciously looking in its direction.

As it grew closer to closing time and Regulus hadn’t made any further progress on his Potions paper, he packed up his space into his bag or back on their assigned shelves—he wasn’t lazy like the librarian. To walk out of the library he had to pass the shelf where the book resided, and Regulus had already fought the temptation to grab the book on his way into the library—a strange temptation inside of him to see whether his note was still there and whether there was another response underneath.

But as he left the library and moved to walk past the book he stopped and reached for it. He told himself that it was just to look. And—out of pure curiosity—he pulled Bourne’s book off of the shelf.

Upon opening the book the page fluttered to the ground. Regulus picked up the piece of parchment and his mouth fell open slightly at what he had found. Sure enough, there was a sentence written under Regulus’ handwriting.

Merlin, why am I more intrigued by you telling me off? I didn’t really intend to snoop. I assumed that it was a student’s potions notes :(

Yes, the person had left a fucking frowny face on the note. He hadn’t even realised that a small smile had formed on his face as he was reading the response. Scowling, he pulled his own quill out of his bag and wrote a brief response underneath. He didn’t give it much thought, assuming that this would be the last letter and no further response would be given. He promised himself that he would not look for an answer in the following days.

So do you just search through the books in the library for other students’ notes? Can’t you do your own homework? And yes, it is weird that me being harsh is intriguing to you.

He placed the note in the book, slamming it shut and returning it to the shelf for what he swore would be the last time.

Only it wasn’t.

Present – 7th May 1983

“After that, the letters continued and so I made a little invention that delivered the letters right to each other, depending on where the object was. For me, it was usually in my bag or trunk so these two idiots,” he pointed at Evan and Barty, “wouldn’t find them.”

Barty and Evan both cried out in exasperation.

“And he had informed me of some security spell he had created so that only a certain phrase would reveal the contents on the page,” Regulus continued, ignoring his two dramatic friends.

Lily’s eyes grew wide, “That sounds exactly like…”

“The Marauders Map,” Remus finished.

“What the fuck is a Marauders Map?” Barty asked, Evan and Regulus also looking just as confused.

“It might be better if you don’t know,” Remus said as Lily nodded in agreement.

“I want to know,” Regulus told them.

“Me too,” Evan agreed.

“Fill us in,” Barty demanded.

Remus sighed. “At Hogwarts, me and my old friends developed a map. A magical map that let us see where everybody was at Hogwarts. To reveal the contents of the map you had to say a certain sentence, otherwise, it would appear blank.”

“And,” Lily continued, “if you tried to use a revealing charm it would deliver personal insults from each of them.”

“Well that sounds fucking creepy,” Barty had a face of pure shock and disgust on his face.

Remus nodded, “It was creepy but it was also useful, especially when we were out of Gryffindor Tower after curfew. I can’t speak for how it was used after I left.”

“So that was how…” Regulus trailed off.

“How what?” Lily prompted.

“How he always seemed to find me when I didn’t want to be found,” He finished after several seconds of silence.

“See,” Barty waved a hand in Regulus’ direction, “that's creepy and invasive.”

“Where does that fit into the story?” Evan asked.

“That comes later,” Regulus replied. “The letters kept going back and forth between us for about seven months.”

“Wait. So did you know that it was James? Did he know it was you?” Lily asked.

“No. And the letters did take my mind off of my obvious feelings for James—since I didn’t know the person was James. I found myself falling in love with the person I was exchanging letters with. Silly, I know.” He gave a small smile and a shrug. Merlin, he had never felt so vulnerable in his entire life.

“I don’t think it’s silly,” Remus shook his head.

“I think it’s romantic,” Lily added with an encouraging smile.

“Does it rival the romance in your porn books?” Barty addressed Lily with a cheeky grin.

“Crouch, if you don’t shut the fuck up about my books…” The redhead trailed off.

“Oo I’m getting the surname treatment from Evans.”

“Crouch,” Remus, Regulus and Lily all said in exasperation. Lily held her hands out towards him like she was imagining herself strangling him.

Barty turned his attention to his boyfriend who was now curled up on the ground with his head in Barry’s lap. Regulus had recognised as early as his second year in Hogwarts that Evan had this effect on Barty, this ability to calm him when he got ‘too much’ while still giving him the attention he needed. Merlin forbid if Evan was to leave the Earth before Barty. Chaos would ensue.

“How did you find out each other’s identities?” Remus prompted once everyone had prepared themselves to get back into Regulus’ story.

“I was the first to figure it out,” Regulus said casually, as if it was a given. “You guys were actually all there apart from Remus—he had left by then. It was mine, Evan and Barty’s fifth year and Ravenclaw was throwing that massive end-of-school-year party.”

“I remember,” Lily nodded.

“I do not,” Barty frowned. “I think the alcohol erased my memories of that night.”

“I was trying to find Pandora when I collided with James and a small yet very familiar object fell to the ground.”

“The letter teleporter?” Remus asked.

“Yes,” he replied with a curt nod. “He apologised and when he realised it was me he tried to talk to me about Quidditch.”

“He did seem rather infatuated with your Quidditch skills during our sixth year,” Lily mused. “I think James fancied you, not just his pen pal.”

“It was highly annoying. He would track me down after curfew and make an excuse to talk to me,” Regulus exhaled a shaky breath. “Anyways, after I bumped into him and found an excuse to run away, I left the party and returned to the Slytherin dorms. I then sat in my bed and shut down.” He paused, giving himself a moment to just breathe. “I didn’t answer any of his notes for two days. I told myself I would stop.”

“But you didn’t,” Remus said.

He looked at Remus as he replied, “It was the younger me’s greatest dream and wish come true; the boy I had fancied since second year was the person I was falling in love with through letters. It felt like fate was pushing us together.”

“Did you tell him?” Lily asked.

“That I was the person he was exchanging letters with?” He gave an amused scoff. “No. Of course not.”

“This is Regulus we are talking about,” Evan told the group.

“I wasn’t going to walk up to him and say: Hey James! That pen pal you have? That’s actually me. I understand if you want to stop. Just please don’t reveal the personal parts of myself to my brother,” he told them. “I’m a selfish person, I didn’t want it to stop. I told myself he could figure it out for himself.”

Evan cleared his throat after several moments of silence. “So how long did it take for James to figure it out?”

“As far as I know, he didn’t. Pandora told him.” Regulus shrugged.

“Pandora knew?” Barty and Evan exclaimed, their mouths dropping open in shock and outrage.

Regulus wanted to thump his two friends on the head. “Pandora knows everything, whether we tell her or not.”

Evan and Barty closed their mouths and started nodding in understanding and acceptance. Evan—more than anyone—knew of Pandora’s gift, he was her twin after all.

“I had stayed back at school for the Christmas holidays in my fifth year and Sirius was supposed to be at Hogwarts too—but he forged our parents’ consent to let him stay at the Potter’s Manor,” he resumed. “So, I sent a letter to Walburga and told her that I wanted to stay back and further advance myself in my studies.”

“And she fell for it?”

“Of course she did. She assumed that I was trying to prove my worth as the successful child of The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black.”

“Typical Pureblood families,” Barty spat with disgust.

Regulus nodded. “And on that train ride that I missed, Pandora sat him down and demanded answers from him and then—from what I was told—the fucking idiot tried jumping off a train when she told him I was the one that sent the letters.”

Evan and Barty tried—and failed—to hold back their laughter at James’ idiotic behaviour.

“That was the reason James tried to do that? To try and get back to you at Hogwarts?” Lily gasped. “He told everyone that he was promised ten galleons by a fourth year if he was successful.”

“Wait,” Lily continued, her smile fading. “Those holidays…”

Remus’ smile also faded at that horrific memory.

“Ah yes,” Regulus said. “My holiday—and Sirius’ holiday—didn’t last long. Less than three days in we were brought back to Black Manor. And two days after that Sirius was disowned and I was the new Heir to the House of Black.”

Everyone fell silent. They all knew bits and pieces of what happened that day from either him or his brother.

Remus broke the silence to Regulus’ relief, changing the topic. “I can’t believe James didn’t even figure it out for himself.”

“I think the fact that it was in an advanced Potions book might have thrown James off a little. I don’t think he was expecting me—a fourth year at the time—to be looking at that book. I honestly wasn’t expecting James Potter—of all people—to be looking in an advanced Potions book either. We never clarified our exact year group or House to keep that anonymity. We just knew we were around the same age.”

“Then what did you talk about?” Evan asked, a frown on his face.

“Anything and everything that didn’t reveal who we were, and even then boundaries were pushed,” Regulus clarified. “When I looked back on the letters and notes I had kept I could see the essence of James and actually felt quite stupid for not figuring it out sooner.”

“What happened after that? When he returned from break?” Lily asked, suddenly sitting upright on the couch as she looked at him with a slightly furrowed brow.

“Oh I was so livid and embarrassed,” Regulus shook his head and exhaled sharply. “You see, I was angry and upset with him before he left which was why Pandora approached James in the first place. But the time apart did nothing to squash those feelings, they only grew.” He knew the expression on his face was quite smug as he told them, “I had disabled my half of the objects so he couldn’t send me any notes. A little benefit of it being my own creation.”

“I remember,” Remus cut in. “James was such a mess when we returned from break. Hang on,” he snapped his head towards Regulus, “that object—the one that you used to transmit the notes–it wasn’t a rock, was it? James was constantly fiddling with one.”

“It was,” Regulus reluctantly nodded. “I told him he could decorate it how he wanted since he was going on in his letters about some Muggle thing his friend had told him about.”

“Googly eyes on rocks?” Lily called out with a laugh. “I told him I had to do that when I was at Muggle school.”

“So, how’d he win you over then?”

“It was James. No one can avoid him for long. Especially now I know he had that map of his to find me.”

“So you two then started a relationship?”

“Nothing official. And nothing… happened until the end of my fifth year when we kissed. Then our relationship in my sixth year changed but it was casual. He told me he only wanted it to last while we were at Hogwarts. And I, selfishly, agreed.”

“He told you that?” Lily said in horror.

“That is so fucked up,” Barty said, his eyes murderous.

“I was so stupid. I was willing to take anything that James gave me.” he buried his face in his hands before moving them to his hair—where he curled his fingers around the roots. “Merlin, he made it feel like it was more than it was. I eventually got lost in what we had and it began to feel real. I thought James felt the same. Then it all came crashing down just before he left Hogwarts.”

“What changed? What did he do?”

“He didn’t want me. Not the same way that I wanted him. He verbally said it and I just couldn’t do it anymore.”

“What do you mean?”Lily asked with a frown.

“I overheard him talking to someone about his secret relationship. He told them it was going to come to an end and he would be free.”

“What? No!? I can’t imagine James saying something like that,” Lily's mouth dropped open in disbelief.

“I know. But I heard him,” Regulus said quietly, vulnerably.

“We don’t doubt you, Reg. It’s just James…” She trailed off.

“Is a caring person who loves with his whole heart?” Regulus scoffed. “Yeah, I thought that too. I thought that we were moving beyond just being casual.”

“What happened after that?”

“I didn’t respond to his letters and avoided seeing him in person for two days. He eventually found me and I ended things. I freed him.”

“How did he react to that?”

“Not well. But I heard him say he wanted to be free. I gave him that.”

“Then it ended? Was that the reason you punched him in the face?”

“Well…” Regulus winced before staring down into his lap. “A week after that—and the day before the train was leaving to take us back to London—I caught sight of James…”

“Yeah?” Barty prompted.

“Holding hands with a girl in the hallway. He gave her a kiss on the cheek before pulling her into an alcove.”

“WHAT?” Lily shouted.

“No fucking way!” Evan said.

“Barty, where are you going?” Remus called out as the man walked towards the door.

“What’s this bar called?” Barty said, rolling up his sleeves.

“Barty, don’t be silly. It happened five years ago,” Regulus sighed.

“No, Reg. I remember you that week before those holidays. You were an absolute wreck. I thought it was because of your brother, but now I’m finding out it was also because of James fucking Potter. He deserves more than just a punch in the face.”

“Barty, please,” Regulus turned his head towards Evan, “Ev?”

“I really really want to let Barty loose on Potter right now. But, I respect your wishes, Reg.” He turned to his boyfriend, who was still fuming by the door. “B? Regulus needs us here right now. With him.”

Barty crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes at his boyfriend. With a sigh, he eventually crossed the room until he reached Evan again, unfurling the fingers that were clenched into fists to bury them in Evan’s hair. “You’re lucky I love you.”

“Without me, you’d be in a prison cell right now. Or a hospital.”

“You think I can’t take Potter?”

“Oh no, you can definitely take him. But you know what would be more fun?” Evan told Barty, a sly grin on his face.

Oh no. Regulus knew that whatever was going to leave Evan’s mouth was not going to be good. For Regulus, at least.

“What?” Barty said, his face lighting up.

“Dangling someone in front of him that he can’t have.”

Oh no. No no no no no. No fucking way.

“You, Ev, are a genius.” Barty pressed a hard kiss to Evan’s mouth, before turning to Regulus. “Reg, have you ever heard of a slut era?”

Present – 11th May 1983
Emmeline’s POV

“I don’t know what to do,” Mary huffed out. “I love her. I love her so much but is it enough to say goodbye to my dreams?”

“You wouldn’t have to say goodbye to your dreams,” Emmeline told the woman, “you can still be an actress here in London.”

“I know,” Mary sighed, her shoulders slumping forward. “It’s just—LA’s my dream. Everyone gets famous famous over there.”

“Is being famous worth more than love?”

“I don’t know anymore,” Mary said quietly. Before Emmeline could reply, Mary asked her, “Where are you gonna go? Once we graduate? Where will directing take you?”

Anywhere you are is what Emmeline wanted to say. But she couldn’t. So, instead, she told Mary with a shrug, “I haven’t decided. I wouldn’t mind travelling but I wouldn’t be unhappy here in London either.”

“At least you get the choice,” Mary uttered under her breath.

Emmeline turned to Mary and took her hands in her own, “Hey, you do get the choice. You can always go to LA for a while and see how it goes with Lily here. Then you can reevaluate.”

“I just want it to work. I want it to be easy. I want to be happy and in love without fighting all the time. I want her…” Mary’s voice broke, “...to want me. It doesn’t feel like she does.”

There was so much that Emmeline wanted to say to that: Do you want her? Have you considered going on a break or breaking up?

But she couldn’t do that to Mary. So, she told her, “She loves you, Mary.”

So do I, Emmeline added in her own head.

Emmeline had loved Mary since their fourth year at Hogwarts. Back then, she was the shy Ravenclaw who didn’t talk to people outside of her friends. But she did want to talk to Mary. But she didn’t. And then Mary started dating Lily in their seventh year and never stopped.

But Emmeline wasn’t a selfish person. She wasn’t going to tell Mary to end her relationship with Lily for her own benefit. She had loved Mary for eight years, she could love her in the shadows for many many more.

“Enough about me and my troubles,” Mary said. “What about you? Did you finally approach that person you fancy?”

“Not yet,” She told her.

“I told you that you just need to tell them how you feel. How could they not feel the same? You’re you.”

Emmeline’s heartbeat picked up and she prayed that Mary couldn’t somehow hear it.

“I—” Emmeline was cut off by the bells of the clock tower.

Mary’s eyes snapped up to the face of the clock. “Oh, fuck is that the time? I need to run to my next class,” she turned away and started speed walking towards the theatre. “Love you, Em.”

Just not the way Emmeline wished she did.

Present – 15th May 1983
Regulus’ POV

“Regulus,” Margaret said, pausing to take a sip of her coffee. “Something is on your mind.”

“Is it that obvious?” he told her, refusing to make eye contact with the witch he had put off seeing since his brief reunion with his brother and his brother’s best friend.

“I’ve been waiting at this coffee shop for you this whole week. It’s terribly rude to keep an elderly witch waiting,” she reprimanded. “Then when you do show up, you look like your cat just died.”

“I don’t have a cat.”

Margaret pinned him with a glare, “Speak, child.”

“I’m not a child,” he frowned at her petulantly.

“You are a child to me. And you are behaving like one right now.”

Regulus sighed. “Remember the story I told you about the boy I was with when I was in school.”

“The one who you were in love with,” Margaret nodded.

Regulus rolled his eyes, ignoring the pang in his chest. “Well, I saw him in a bar about a week ago.”

“You did something, didn’t you?” Margaret said, suspicion in her voice.

“I punched him in the face,” he told her as if it wasn’t a big deal. “Well, I punched my brother in the face first.”

A chuckle escaped the old witch. “Oh, Regulus. You remind me so much of myself.”

“That scares me.”

Margaret narrowed her eyes on Regulus and he squirmed under her gaze. “You saw your brother too? The one with the silly name like yours,” she asked.

“Sirius. Yes,” he nodded hesitantly.

“Well, what are you going to do about it?” Margaret demanded in a loud voice for such an elderly witch.

“What do you mean?” Regulus replied. “I’m going to do nothing. I am not going back to that bar.”

“Why not?” Margaret asked him, taking another sip of her coffee.

“What do you mean, why not?” he told her with a hiss. “It’s obvious why not. Are you losing your mind in your old age?”

Margaret simply smiled at his response, simply used to his antics when someone said something that made him upset, angry, or uncomfortable.

“You need to show that boy what he is missing out on.”

“Not you too,” Regulus groaned.

“Someone else has already told you the same thing? See, we give you good advice Regulus,” she told him firmly. “Take our advice.”

“That is terrible advice!” His face contorted in horror. “He doesn’t care about me. He doesn’t want me. I don’t even want him!”

Another chuckle escaped the witch sitting opposite him. “That is the biggest lie I have heard from you. Regulus, that man is written on your soul,” she told him. “Just like my Harold was. The man is just too stupid to see it.”

“You have lost your mind,” he shook his head in disbelief. Margaret was the first person that he fully told the story to about him and James. She was therefore supposed to be on his side, agreeing with his decision to never return to that bar. Yet, here she was encouraging him the same way his friends were. You would expect an elderly witch to have better advice than that.

“Just do what I did with Harold when he refused to court me,” she said with an evil grin.

“Which was?” Regulus asked, slightly terrified for the answer. He had heard some stories of Margaret’s plotting and some of it was truly frightening.

“Snog another man in front of him. Worked pretty well for me. I got eighty-seven years with that man of mine.”

“You are evil, Margaret. You are just as bad as Barty.”

“I think me and this Barty friend of yours would get along quite well,” she hummed as she took a bite out of her blueberry muffins.

“You two are never meeting,” Regulus said in horror, just imagining the two of them together.

Margaret levelled him with a glare that contained both a promise and a threat in it. “The next time we meet I am expecting to hear that you have made progress on this project of yours.”

“It’s not a project and it’s not happening,” Regulus told her, ignoring the part of himself that wanted to be petty like his friends were suggesting.

“We’ll see,” Margaret said with a smile. “I know you never stopped loving that man, Regulus. And if he really hurt you that much then what is the problem with a little revenge? The worst case scenario is that he doesn’t care.” She shrugged. “But ask yourself this: what if he does?”

Present – 19th May 1983
Remus’ POV

“What’s wrong with Regulus?” Lily asked as she walked into their apartment with a frown on his face.

Regulus was currently pacing the apartment and visibility fuming. Remus knew how he felt, he felt the same way following the news they had both just received at work.

The dark-haired man stopped in front of them. “Cuffe called for a compulsory celebration and it’s all his fault,” he emphasised his fury with a finger pointed in Remus’ direction.

“How’s it my fault?” Remus said, turning to Regulus with a look of disbelief on his face.

“You are the one that is boosting the viewers of The Daily Prophet,” Regulus glared at him, continuing to point his finger towards Remus’ face.

“I blame the coworkers for talking so much about the bar that Cuffe decided to host there,” Remus replied.

“Wait,” Lily said, holding both her hands up. “What is so bad about this celebration?”

“Take a guess,” Remus told her, folding his arms across his chest.

“Regulus has to make a massive speech in front of his coworkers?” she offered.

“Worse,” Regulus shook his head. “Way, way worse.”

Remus sighed, running a hand over his face. “It’s being held at The Black Dog this Friday.”

Lily’s mouth fell open. “Is that the bar that—”

“Yes,” Remus and Regulus said together, cutting her off before she named any of the two people they were collectively avoiding.

“What are the fucking odds?” A giggle erupted from Lily which earned her a glare from Regulus. “I’m sorry, I really am. That is so shit.”

“Thank you for your concern,” Regulus said, his voice overwhelmed with sarcasm. “I really appreciate it.”

“And Remus,” she turned to him, “you must be screaming inside.”

A grimace crossed his face, “I don’t want to go.”

“You can always call in sick?” Lily offered.

“Then we both have to call in sick. Which could cost me my job. And I simply refuse to go alone,” Regulus scowled.

“I’m the same,” Remus nodded.

“At least you have each other?” Lily supplied. “And the bar would be busy, right? Just get someone else to order your drinks.”

“Believe me,” Remus said in all seriousness. “I refuse to go anywhere near that bar.”

“Just maybe not punch anyone in front of your boss, Regulus?” Lily winced.

“No promises.”

“Have you reconsidered Barty and Evan’s suggestion?” Lily asked him.

“What do you think?” Remus asked with an amused scoff as Regulus gave Lily a murderous look.

“Is flirting with another guy in front of James really that bad?”

“Yes. It is bad. Very bad,” Regulus exclaimed. “Nothing is going to come of it and I don’t want to deal with the man that I am flirting with.”

“Why not flirt with Remus?”

“What!?” Regulus said, gagging dramatically. “Never suggest anything like that again.”

“Hear me out,” Lily said, bouncing with excitement, “It doesn’t have to be anything major, just lightly brush his arm and smile at him.” She turned to Regulus. “You do know how to smile, right?”

Regulus turned to her and pressed his lips together in a mocking smile. He then faced Remus again, “Why do you look guilty?”

“I might have said something when I saw James at the bar the other week.”

“Oh fuck,” Remus watched Regulus bury his face in one of his hands. “What did you do?”

“He might have said something about me being there for a date and I was in too much shock to correct him.”

Regulus nodded slowly, unsurely, as if his brain was still putting the pieces together. “But you left.”

Remus grimaced, “And then you showed up…”

“Oh. My. God,” Lily’s hand clasped across her mouth, suppressing a laugh.

“Remus,” Regulus closed his eyes in frustration. “You did not imply to James that we were dating, did you? What about my brother, did you lead him to think that too?”

“No!” Remus replied. “Unless he came to his own assumptions or James told him.”

Lily nodded, finally removing her hand from her mouth. “It all depends on whether they were able to put the pieces together.”

Regulus scoffed. “They do share one brain cell between the two of them.”

“So if you two were to show up together on Friday…” Lily began with a wide grin. “James and Regulus might lose their shit.”

“No. No. It’s not happening,” Regulus shook his head.

“They are going to assume you are, anyway. What’s the harm in using it to your own advantage?” Lily asked.

“Why is everyone telling me it will cause no harm?” Regulus exclaimed. “It will make me look stupid.”

“Reg.” Remus turned toward Regulus with a look on his face that caused the man’s eyes to widen in horror.

“No. Not you too,” Regulus shook his head.