She was sitting at her favourite desk in the library when she felt her hair being moved and a kiss being placed on her neck. A tiny shiver made it’s way down her spine.
“How is the paper going?” He asked her.
She looked up and smiled at him. “It’s going well. I may have succeeded the length of allowed parchment paper already, but I’m nearly finished.”
He chuckled. “I would have suspected nothing less.”
He took a seat next to her and started to unpack his bag. Her eyes immediately darted around the library.
“Draco, what are you doing? Someone could see you,” she whispered worriedly. Anxiety started to spread through her body. They might be friendly in the eyes of others, but they weren’t ‘do schoolwork together’ friendly.
“Hermione, your favourite desk is at the back of the library. Nobody goes this far, the whole lot of them are allergic to books, I believe.” He waved his hand at the empty desks surrounding them.
“You’re right.” She should calm down. There was nothing to worry about. Still, she couldn’t entirely shake the unnerving feeling.
She looked at him and he was looking way too smug. “I’m always right.”
“Shut up,” she laughed as she shoved him a little.
He grabbed her and shut her up with a kiss. She melted into his embrace and sighed against his mouth. Her mind went blank, and her worries floated away. He had a knack for making her feel safe and calm.
“Can I come to your dorm tonight?” He whispered. “I miss you.”
“I slept in your dorm two nights ago,” she chuckled.
“Please,” he begged as his thumb caressed her cheek. Well, how could she say no when he was doing that?
“Come over after eleven o’clock, so Harry doesn’t see you,” she smiled at him.
He rested his forehead on hers. “I can’t wait for us to graduate. I hate having to sneak around and not being able to see you whenever I want to.”
“Draco-”
“I know. I know you want to protect us, but it’s just hard,” he interrupted her, and she felt a stab in her heart at the pain in his voice.
It broke her heart. It shouldn’t have to be this hard. She knew that if it were up to him that they would be openly together, but she was afraid that external forces would ruin them before they had had the time to build a solid foundation. She was afraid that they would attack him for being with her. He had done an excellent job at flying under the radar since the beginning of the year and he was finally being left alone. She didn’t want to ruin that.
Besides, she was aware of what the public opinion would be of their relationship, and she knew that he would suffer from what they would write about her. She also knew that she was just postponing the inevitable, but she wanted to exist in their little bubble for just a bit longer.
She laid in his arms that night, when he kissed the top of her head and said, “I should go, baby.”
“I don’t want you to go,” she said softly and tightened her hold on his waist.
“I know, love. Me neither. But it’s late. Just four more nights and you can sleep over again,” he tried to reassure her. It was a school night, and they only ever stayed the entire night when they were certain that people woke up later.
She reluctantly walked with him towards the portrait and kissed him goodbye. She smiled to herself as she turned around to head back to her room.
A throat cleared at the top of the stairs.
She looked up to see Harry standing just outside of his door and her heart dropped. How much had he seen?
“H-”
“You’re fucking Malfoy?” His voice was cold, detached.
Fuck.
“No, Harry-”
“So that was not Malfoy coming out of your room nor was it Malfoy you kissed before he went out the portrait?” His eyes were slits as he slowly walked down the stairs.
“Yes, but-”
He interrupted her once again. “You’re screwing Draco Malfoy, ‘Mione!” He shouted at her. He looked at her with a crazed look and she could hear the pain and anger in his voice.
“Harry, please let me explain,” she tried.
“Explain what, ‘Mione?” He exclaimed. “How you are fucking a Death Eater? The one that has bullied you – us – since we were eleven?” Tears streamed down Hermione’s face as she tried to keep the sobs that threatened to escape at bay. “Or how you have been lying about it for Merlin knows how long?”
He shook his head. “How could you do this? Did he force you into do-”
“No!” She quickly interrupted him. “No, he didn’t force me into anything. That's not-”
“Then how the fuck could you do this – with him. And lie to my face about it!” He pointed at his own chest. “All those long nights at the library, you were with him, weren’t you?”
The look on her face must have been enough of a confirmation, because Harry picked up a mug and threw it against the wall. Hermione shrunk into herself as her heart completely broke. She felt sick. She was ruining everything.
“It just happened. I didn’t plan on it, but it-”
Harry turned back around and crowded her. “You will not see him again. You’re done. This sham is done. Fuck someone else if you want your needs met, but never again with him.” His voice was dangerously low, and it took everything for Hermione to not flinch.
As Harry walked away from her, she sobbed. “Please. Don’t ask that of me.”
That seemed to aggravate him even more. “What did you think was going to happen, ‘Mione?” He spit at her. “Did you think that I was just going to welcome him with open arms? You are my best friend, ‘Mione, but you couldn’t have expected me to just forgive you for this, could you? Did you really think that you would have some happily ever after with that fucking piece of scum?”
“He’s not…” she sobbed. “He didn’t have a choice. He isn’t like that anymore. Please, just give him a chance,” she pleaded.
“A chance? Give him a chance? You must be more delusional than I thought. You end it, ‘Mione. Or we’re done,” he spit.
She started to walk towards him, but thought better of it. “Don’t ask me to choose between you two. Because I will choose you. Of course I will choose you. I will always choose you, because I love you. You are my family.” She tried to get air to her lungs, but it was nearly impossible. “But I’m in love with him, Harry. Please don’t make me choose, because it will break me.”
“You are joking. You must be. You are not in love with Malfoy, a fucking Death Eater. You have not lost your mind that much.” All the emotions on his face were breaking her heart more and more. Betrayal, hurt, anger and she was afraid that she could even see hate.
“I am. I’m so sorry, Harry, but I am,” she cried. “He makes me feel safe, and at peace, and loved. Please don’t make me choose.” They hadn't said the words yet, but everything that he did made her feel loved.
Without saying another word, Harry walked up the stairs, into his dorm room and slammed the door behind him.
She couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t fucking breathe and all she could hear was the ringing in her ears.
Needing to get out of there, she somehow made her way out of the dorm and into the Prefect’s bathroom. She stumbled into the furthest stall, the one no one ever used, and sunk to the ground.
He wanted her to end things with Draco. He was making her choose between him and Draco. She was going to have to break up with Draco. And it was going to break her.