regulus had many hideouts around hogwarts. between the castle and its grounds, he always had somewhere to go when he needed to be alone.
his favorite spot was this large, secluded willow tree overlooking the black lake. he found himself under this tree a few times a week for a variety of reasons he'd rather not share, thank you.
one day in early october, a decently large black dog pranced over to him and lied down only a few centimeters from the boys legs. the dog didn't make a sound, didn't sniff or lick him, didn't even make contact with his skin, it just lied there.
he actually appreciated it more than he cared to admit, but ultimately thought it strange that a random dog would come out of nowhere as if it had been his own.
the next time he was in his spot, the dog came again. it was oddly coincidental, but regulus thought little of it, coming up with any possible rationalizations and choosing one that made enough sense. he's a stray.
and, as before, the dog simply lied beside him, close enough for comfort but never leaning against the boy. regulus quite liked this dog.
the dog, which he decided to call snuffles, came back every single time regulus sat at that tree from there on out. sometimes the dog even beat him there, somehow knowing when he was coming.
after a few weeks, regulus had a particularly bad day and was beyond upset when he found his spot. he's never spoken to snuffles before, never felt the need to, but this time he really opened up. it was just a dog, who cares if he rants to it? who's the dog gonna tell?
the dog seemed attentive and reactive to his rants, which set regulus slightly on edge. maybe he was abandoned, maybe he ran away. maybe this dog was not a stray, but looking for his family. maybe he already knew how to read the boy because he had one before. but alas, it is still a dog and dogs still can't talk.
winter holidays came around and regulus knew he was gonna miss his mystery dog. he thought about the poor thing every day, wondering where it lived, what it ate, if it ate. he decides to start bringing it food after the break.
of course, winter break was the worst it could've been. after two weeks of harsh words and even harsher wands, sirius left. he left without saying goodbye. he left without packing a bag. he left without second thought. and regulus knew he left to save his life but that didn't make it hurt any less. he'd been abandoned.
he thought of nothing but that stray dog for the rest of the holiday.
so when regulus returned to hogwarts, he found the same tree and he waited. and waited. and waited. but the dog never came. and regulus laughed. for the second time in only a few days, he had lost the brightest piece of his life.
he couldn't help but theorize every reason why. the poor thing could've starved to death or been killed by something in the dark forest. or he could've forgotten about regulus. he could've ventured out and found a family. or maybe it was as simple as not knowing he had returned.
he didn't see the dog for another week, but he never gave up trying. he wasn't as willing to accept this loss.
it was nearing the two week mark since he'd been back and he was almost certain snuffles would never return. but he gave it one more day. one last try.
and the dog came.
regulus noticed that snuffles walked with a limp instead of prancing around like usual. he's hurt. so this time, for the first time, regulus reached out and pet snuffles.
"what do you get up to out there?" he questioned softly as he reached into his bag for the snack he never forgot to bring.
the dog accepted it graciously, both the food and the affection, and moved closer to the boy that time. he even went as far as resting his head on the boy's knee. regulus gave no protest.
from then on, the meetings between the boy and his dog became daily. regulus would stay out for hours and just sit with this dog. simply sit. whether he sat in silence, studied, read a book, talked about everything that had happened each day, it didn't matter. the dog never left before him.
once they were settled into their spots, regulus began speaking.
"i saw sirius in the great hall today," he started, his tone quite somber, "he hasn't been since we got back. i suppose he took time to heal." snuffles' ears perked up.
"i'm glad he has his friend, they're good for him. i just..." the dog made eye contact, somehow urging him to continue, "i wish they didn't need to be. i wish i didn't have to push him so far away for him to see that it was time to go. i wish he didn't have to go at all, really."
he started choking on his words, tears stinging his eyes. he didn't have to hold back, no one was around, but he didn't want to cry. not yet. not before he could work through his thoughts.
"he's my big brother, y'know? he's the best person i know, and here he is on a suicide mission by simply going home. and i couldn't help him. he helped me all the time, even when i didn't need it. but i- i couldn't. there was nothing i could do but watch.” regulus grew louder as he opened up, hot tears escaping against his will. “i just wish things were different. i wish we had a better family, one where our parents loved us, really loved us, one where we could actually be brothers."
he reached his hand to rub snuffles' head, soothing his own mind in doing so.
"i don't think he likes me much," the dog huffed at that, "i mean, he left without even saying goodbye! he didn't even give me any notice! i just woke up and he was gone and mother and father were fighting over whether she'd killed him or not!” he slumped, his voice quivering as he ranted, “they didn't even ask if i knew anything. was it- so obvious he didn't like me that even they knew he wouldn't have told me a thing?"
he wiped his eyes before pulling another treat out of his bag and feeding it to the shepherd on his knees.
"if i had a better home i'd take you with me in a heartbeat. you're probably my best friend now. i talk to you more than anyone else, anyway. i think you'd like pandora, though. i know she'd like you. but that's for another time, i'm not ready to share you yet."
he paused for a while, deep in thought as he stared into the sky, hand never leaving the dog's head.
"i think i remind him too much of them," he states out of nowhere, "i think i play the part too well. i think he believes it. i don't know why i haven't thought of that before. i think that's why he hates me."
snuffles huffed again.
"i'd hate me too, if that were the case. i think i should talk to him."
that last statement was met with a waging tail.
"you think so too? i don't know, he probably won't want to hear it. he'll have a better life without me, i don't want to get in the way of that."
the dog barked this time, his first bark since the two had met. regulus was startled for a moment, unsure of what it meant.
"i'll be fine. as long as he's okay, i will be fine. i won't let them kill him. i'll find a way to save him. maybe you and i can run off together one day, too. i'll get a cabin somewhere and we can just restart. isn't that a nice dream?"
another tail wag. regulus stood up and looked out at the lake.
"too bad that's all it is, a dream. now that sirius is out i'll be stuck forever and we'll have to kiss that cabin goodbye." he heard a small shift behind him, but didn't turn to see it, figuring snuffles just moved a bit.
"come with me then." regulus felt his heart stop. he was here alone, he was certain, and he would've heard anyone coming. if not, snuffles would've signaled him.
he slowly turned to see his brother, which he expected, and no dog, which he thought had taken off when a stranger showed up.
"sirius?"
"well, i can't say i enjoyed snuffles very much."
"what are you doing here? when did you get here?"
"uh, about that..." sirius likely could've lied, but he hated lying to regulus. besides, his brother knew his tells. " 'snuffles', as you called him, is... well, he's me."
"no," regulus barked out with a laugh, "no he's not. no you're not. the only way that could be true is if- but you're too young for that, you couldn't- are you serious?"
"i'm alwa-"
"-always sirius, yeah i know," he shook his head in faux annoyance, "it's been you the whole time?"
"it has."
"why didn't you say anything?" he sounded hurt.
"because i didn't think you'd wanna hear from me," he admitted regretfully, "and you seemed to like padfoot- or snuffles i guess- and i thought, y'know, if you liked the dog then i didn't want to take it from you."
"why did you come here in the first place?" hurt melted into confusion. regulus didn't understand exactly what was going on. or maybe he just didn't want to.
"i saw you sitting out here a few times," he started, "you looked sad. i didn't want you to be alone and everyone loves a dog so... i gave you a dog. then, when you kept coming back i thought maybe i should too so i did."
"and last week?"
"didn't you answer that yourself earlier?"
"i suppose i did."
"i wasn't kidding, by the way. about coming with me. i already talked to james, he said he'd be happy to have us both."
"i can't leave, frère, you know that."
"yes you can! just say the word and i will make sure we never see them again! the potter's already handled everything they just need you to say yes!"
"it's not that simple, sir-"
"no, it's not," sirius cut his brother off, "but it's already been dealt with. do you want to stay in that house forever or do you want to be free?"
"are you going to make me share a room with you?" and sirius knew he won.
"oh, come off it, i make a pretty good roommate," he playfully defended, "much better than james, anyway. that man has never heard of a hamper. leaves his quidditch robes around like they're decoration or something."
“oh, and i’m sure you’re fur hasn’t been a nuisance before,” the younger one threw back.
“oi! i’ll have you know padfoot is very well groomed!” sirius defended.
“even as a dog, you value vanity above all,” they chuckled together.
“je t'aime, petit frère” sirius reached a hand out to his brother.
“je t'aime aussi, siri,” regulus replied, taking his brother’s hand and heading back towards the castle.
and for the first time in his life, regulus actually believed he had a chance.