Prologue
James remembers his wedding day like it was yesterday. He remembers his mates standing next to him as he stood at the altar in a fancy suit. He remembers being nervous as he watched Lily walk down the aisle. He remembered wondering if he was doing the right thing and wondered if he and Lily had moved too fast. He loved Lily; he had loved her since they first met in school. He had spent years trying to convince her to date him. After almost seven years she had finally agreed. The first date was amazing and after a few months of dating they both decided to get married.
The wedding was beautiful and once James saw Lily walking down the aisle James' fears and nerves melted away. He was marrying his best friend and everything was going to be ok. Everything did turn out ok for the most part. James and Lily might have married young but their marriage never suffered. They never really enjoyed sex but that didn’t really matter to them. Eventually Lily fell pregnant. Although James and Lily hadn’t planned on having a child they were still so excited to be parents.
On July 31 Lily gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby boy. The moment James held his baby boy in his arms James knew his life was complete. His beautiful baby boy. Harry was the best thing to ever happen to James and Lily. Everyone warned James and Lily that they were moving too fast and to be fair everyone had a point.
James and Lily just didn’t listen. Why would they? Everything was going great for them, their son was happy and healthy, their marriage was good and both of their careers were taking off. At first many people complained (mostly to Lily) about how it was ‘improper’ for her to go back to med school after having Harry.
James thought this was stupid why would Lily stay home? She was so close to being done with school? Lily was always a hard worker and never let anyone or anything stop her from her goals. It was one of the reasons James loved her so much. Lily loved their son and cared so much for him but she also loved and cared for her job. It was a different kind of love but James would never ask Lily to give up her dreams. Besides the more he and Lily worked and focused on their dreams the more his family and friends got to hang out with Harry.
Everyone adored Harry and who could blame them? Harry always had a goofy smile on his face and could light up a room just by being in it. James and Lily made sure to spend any time they could with their son and spoil him rotten. Well James spoiled Harry rotten. Lily always tried to make sure they didn’t spoil him too much to where he would become entitled.
So it came as a surprise when one day Lily sat James down and tried to tell him she was quitting med school to become a stay at home mom. At first James thought she was joking because Lily? Stay at home mom? She would hate it!
Lily had tried to convince James to let her quit but James couldn’t let her. Not when she was so close to being done with school. So after a few hours of arguing (and a lot of tears) James finally convinced Lily to not quit school. James made sure that whenever anyone tried to give his wife a hard time about not quitting med school he gave them a very long lecture about how they are wrong and need to shut up.
After a while most people left Lily alone and the ones who still tried to argue were simply ignored. It paid off in the end because Lily was able to finish school early! They celebrated Lily’s success with a night out and lots of presents.
Lily even managed to get a job at a local hospital. She worked long and oddd hours and was always tired when she got home. James made sure that the house was always clean and that there was food ready for Lily when she did get home. On her days off she would spend them with their son playing with him and taking care of him.
James' career was doing well too. He had joined a really good Rugby team and was doing great. He loved his team but he honestly loved his family more. So it came to a surprise when after four years of marriage James started feeling like something was wrong.
It started on a random morning he had woken up next to his beautiful wife and felt wrong. Like something was missing. James racked his brain trying to figure out what could be wrong but couldn’t think of anything. It made James feel horrible. How could he feel like this? His life was perfect; he had everything he needed. Why did he feel like this?
He had a good job that he loved, an amazing wife, and a son who was the best thing on this planet. So what was missing? James tried talking to his parents but they couldn’t understand their marriage was perfect so of course they couldn’t understand. James also tried talking to his friends but they were also no help. The only person who could help James was well James.
James felt guilty he shouldn’t feel like this. He felt scared to talk to Lily not because he thought she would be mad but because James was scared that if he told Lily it would make the feeling real. He tried to ignore it, tried to just push it down and forget about it. The guilt was eating up at James he couldn’t sleep or eat. Lily started to notice this change in James behavior and started to worry.
This made James feel even worse. He shouldn’t be making Lily worry over something he didn’t understand. He hated this feeling of helplessness. Eventually Lily must have gotten tired of James moping around and sat him down to talk.
Apparently Lily had also been feeling like something was missing. She had also been feeling guilty for having these feelings. James was so lucky to have her in his life. They had a long discussion about what exactly they were feeling. They decided that they should probably go to a couple counselor to help them figure things out.
The first one they went to was terrible. She made James feel like shit and wasn’t helpful at all. The second counselor they went to was actually really helpful. They helped James and Lily really figure out the root of their issue. After a few sessions James and Lily finally were able to figure out what was wrong. James was gay and Lily was a lesbian.
Somehow James and Lily had completely confused romantic love with platonic love. The realization was like lifting a weight off of their shoulders. It was like adding the final piece to a puzzle. Nothing really changed after that. Lily and James still loved each other; it was just a different kind of love. They decided that they should probably get a divorce.
Not because they hated each other but because they wanted to be able to marry once they found someone they would love romantically. The hardest part about divorcing Lily was having to tell everyone. James felt so guilty at first. He loved Lily and hated himself for not loving Lily enough. Thankfully James' family and friends took everything really well. They accepted Lily and James with open arms (and tried to set both up with dates). Lily’s family was a different story.
Lily’s family did not like the fact James and Lily divorced; they also didn’t like the fact that Lily was a lesbian. Lily’s older sister especially didn’t like the fact Lily was a lesbian. Lily’s sister ended up simply cutting Lily out of her life. This broke Lily and it broke James' heart to see Lily hurt this way. Once James' parents heard about the situation they decided Lily was simply their daughter now.
Sirius and Lily also became very close after her sister cut contact. Sirius knew very well what it was like to have parents who didn’t accept you and a sibling cut you out of their life. James was happy that his friends and family loved Lily so much and was happy Lily had people to talk to.
Lily and James were really nervous about telling Harry. They knew he wouldn’t care that they were queer. Most of James and Lily’s friends were queer. They were worried about telling him they were getting a divorce. They had read that divorcing can be hard on a small child. They tried avoiding the topic for as long as possible but finally they sat Harry down and explained it to him. Thankfully Harry took the news really well.
He was actually excited for James and Lily to get a divorce since in his mind meant he would be getting two birthdays and two holidays. He was very upset when James and Lily had to tell him that no Lily and James divorcing did not mean he would get two birthdays and two holidays.
Like they guessed he didn’t really care that they were queer.
“You're like uncle moony and uncle padfoot!” He said excitedly. James and Lily's hearts had melted at the comment.
Life was good again and James would not have changed a single thing. Unfortunately for James the universe had other plans.