Chapter 22
I powered my limbs slightly and fought against Natalie with everything I had, she was faster and stronger, but I had magic and since she was going to die, I was going to use it. I threw a stapler at Victor and it hit him right on the temple and knocked him out cold. "NOOO!" Natalie yelled furious as she lunged at me fangs bared. I blocked her and fought and swiped her with the stake twice, making her hiss in pain and knocked me over hard. Then she jumped on me furiously trying to bite me. I kept her face away from her and she squeezed her legs around my body and I felt my ribs crack. Using magic for the first time and hoping there were no cameras around I froze her body and pushed her off me. Jumped up and rushed towards her. She was still frozen when I straddled her and staked her immediately, I was not sure if there were cameras around yet and cursed myself for not checking. I released the spell since it would look odd if she didn't fight back as I pushed the stake through the strong bone into the chest plate. She raked her nails across my face at first and then she was still. I rolled off her and groaned in pain laying next to her, blood pooling around us. My guilt overwhelmed me. I didn't want to kill her; she was just a child. And I killed her, a child.
I moved back from Natalie's still form and held my aching chest now. I was pretty sure I had a concussion too, the hit I received on my head was not a soft one. I moved away from the body and sat up against the wall, my feet straight in front of me. I killed my first Strigoi in this life, it made me sick to my stomach that she was so young but she was the one who orchestrated most of the terror in my best friend's life. She killed someone to become a Strigoi. She was disturbed and ... and ... no matter what excuses I thought of, nothing could justify what I had just done. I started crying, I was the murderer I killed her, I let this all happen. I should have gone to Victor and just fessed up. None of this would have happened if I just healed him. I knew better, but I wanted to walk a mile in Rose's shoes, wanted to see how life at the famous St. Vlads was and now look. And then Dimitri was there, taking in the scene before him in shock. The stake was still in Natalie's chest and Victor was just lying there, I hope I didn't kill him too, I might have thrown the stapler too hard, I threw a stapler, it was funny and stupid. "Rose, Roza. Open your eyes. Don't go to sleep." Something warm was running down my neck. So the bump left a mark it seemed. Dimitri slipped his arms under my body and stood up. Carrying me towards the clinic, I seemed to be spending way too much time there. I was fighting to keep my eyes open. "I killed her, I am a monster. I killed a child." I croaked out "Oh Roza --" I could not keep my eyes open anymore and I knew no more after that.
That is how two days after I had been discharged from the clinic, I woke up there again. My third time since I had been back in the academy. I had 2 cracked ribs, some internal bleeding, and a concussion. But that proved no problem at all for my kick-ass healer Lissa. She healed all my injuries including the ones I got from the psi hounds. I still had to stay there for a couple of days. But Lissa and Christian never left my side when they weren't in class. Through them, I learned bits and pieces about the outside world. Dimitri found Natalie's victim. Mr. Nagy of all people so there was no more Slavic art for us. The guardians in the detention center had been injured but not killed. She simply slammed them around as she had me. Victor was easily captured, I did not kill him, he had a wicked bump on his head but he was fine. And Lissa was wonderful, happy, and in the beginning stages of being head over heels in love.
She did not have to go on the pills since I kept the depression at bay and no one knew about the cutting or the after-effects of her healing but me, Christian, and Lissa herself. Lissa finally accepted that Andre might not have been the hero she'd always believed him to be. It was hard on her, but she finally reached a peaceful decision, accepting that he could have had both good and bad sides, like we all do. What he'd done to Mia saddened her, but it didn't change the fact that he'd been a good brother who loved her. Most importantly, it finally freed her from feeling like she needed to be him to make her family proud. She could be herself -- which she proved daily in her relationship with Christian.
The school still couldn't get over that. She didn't care. She laughed it off ignoring the shocked looks and disdain from the royals who couldn't believe she'd date someone from a humiliated family. Not all of them felt that way though. Some who had gotten to know her during her brief social whirlwind actually liked her for her, no compulsion necessary. They liked her honesty and openness, preferring it to the game’s most royals played. A lot of royals ignored her, of course, and talked viciously about her behind her back. Most surprising of all, Mia -- despite being utterly humiliated -- managed to wiggle back into the good graces of a couple of these royals. It proved my point. She wouldn't stay down for long. I saw the first signs of her revenge lurking again when I walked past her one day on the way to class.
She stood with a few other people and spoke loudly, clearly wanting me to hear. "-- perfect match. Both of them are from completely disgraced and rejected families." Apparently, I didn't punch her hard enough but I ignored her and walked away. Lissa and Christian were in their little world and as long as they were happy I did not care. Our social circle began to steadily grow, Mason joined of course, and made no secret of his interest in me. Much to my annoyance, Lissa teased me a lot about that and I didn't know what to do with him. I made it clear that I saw him as a friend, just a friend. I was not ready to let go of my past yet, I was not ready to trust my heart with someone new, and if I did, it would be only one man who might be able to stand in the footsteps of all the great men that has been in my life before him. Dimitri, no one else made me feel so alive and since I was still in school I could wait. I was perfectly content to just wait.
For the most part, Dimitri treated me just like anyone would expect of a mentor. He was efficient, fond, strict, and understanding. There was nothing out of the ordinary, nothing that would make anyone suspect what had passed between us -- save for an occasional meeting of our eyes. I did see the shadow kissed Raven but did not want to look stupid by asking it to sit on my arm. But I also know that I was at the end of the Vampire Academy and no matter how badly I felt about killing Natalie, I was too afraid of the consequences if I did go against the original timeline, it always ended up really badly for me if I did make changes and I have already reached my quota of hospital visits this year.