“I'm joining.” It was an offhand comment, a simple thought.
Barty had turned to him so fast,” The death eaters?” He stared at Severus. Severus nodded watching the group.
Evan shared a look with Regulus before speaking,” You want to?”
Severus nodded,” I want to win-“
“Dumbledore is winning this war,” it was an offhand comment, a simple thought.
Severus paused,” the old man? He’ll probably die during it.”
Sirius laughed at that and shrugged,” I trust him. I'm joining the Order.” Sirius smiled, watching Severus for a reaction he wouldn't have. He wasn’t one to please others.
“You’re making a-“
-Mistake, I messed up.” He panted, stumbling into the room. Avery and Mulciber looking at him.
“What do you mean? We won.” Avery sighed and pulled Severus off the floor.
Muliber watched them before speaking,” We are supposed to-”
“Win?” He shouted,” All you wanted was to win and we lost. We fucking lost. We lost.”
Regulus watched Severus and shrugged,” Not yet, Voldemort lost. Who said we should.” Severus stared at him carefully.
“We?” He scoffed,” What? Do we become spies?”
Regulus thought it over and sighed,” We could. I'm not fighting for that sadist. You can if you want. But the second I can- I’m killing him.”
Severus stared, kill? He couldn’t kill-
“The potters.” He demanded,” our next target.” Severus froze. James? Sirius would be devastated. He watched Pettigrew, he never had a good poker face. He looked terrified. Weak.
Severus couldn’t be weak. He couldn’t afford to lose. He saw Regulus. If Black could keep up a face, a knife behind his back plotting to stab Voldemort, he would. He couldn’t-
Lose. He was on the wrong side, he realized much too late. He lost.
And he lost everything.