Family Line
“F2 Champion Regulus Black announced as Aston Martins star signing for the 2022 season following the announcement of the Black family joining the company as CEOs”
James’ head shot up from the book he was reading to look over at Sirius sitting at his kitchen counter. He didn’t have to ask him to repeat or clarify what was said, he could see what was said just from his facial expression alone. Sirius’ usual complexion had washed away and had been replaced with a white sheet, his eyes already filled with tears.
Time seemed to move in slow motion as Sirius threw his phone at the wall and grabbed his coat before storming out of the house, James ran after him but as soon as he got to the door a phone started ringing, Sirius’ phone. He watched out the door as he saw Sirius pick up into a jog down the street and James sighed taking off his shoes and putting one in front of the door so it wouldn’t close on him so he could get back whenever he had burnt off his energy. James turned back to the phone ringing on the floor and winced as he saw the screen completely shattered.
Unknown Caller
James answered the phone without saying anything, waiting for the other person to speak.
“Sirius? est-ce que tu? je suis désolé frère” James didn’t recognise the voice on the other end of the phone but knew it had to be one of them, nobody else knew that Sirius spoke French. The voice continued rambling in French getting more frantic. Eventually, the voice stopped, waiting for the other to say something.
“Stay away from him” James spoke finally after the two sat silent. “Va te faire enculer”.
“Potter. of course, the only French he has taught you is how to tell somebody to fuck off” the voice spoke again. “Is my brother there? I need to talk to him before he sees the news, it’s important. Please”
“Please? I didn’t know that was in your vocabulary Regulus, he’s already seen it anyway. Like I said, stay away from him. Don’t even dare to step near us in the paddock, the team is well aware of how Sirius was treated as a child. The Ferrari garage will never be a space for you Black”
“Va te faire enculer”
The line went dead and James put the phone down on the counter before putting his head into his hands. Sirius's phone lit up again and without looking at who was calling he answered.
“You don’t know when to stop do you Black? Don’t you think you’ve done enough damage bringing them back into the place that Sirius created to get away from them? It’s funny how as soon as they saw their disgraced child gain fame and reputation they tried to replicate it with you. I almost feel sorry for you that you can’t make a decision for yourself that isn’t dictated by the fear of your parents”
“Ja-” a voice tries to interrupt him.
“No, you don’t get to be here and act like the concerned younger brother you pretend you are. You weren’t there when he turned up at the motorhome in France, you may be his family by blood but he chose his family a long time ago and it wasn’t you Black. He’s a Potter in every single way that matters.”
“Prongs.” James pulled the phone away from his ear and looked at who he was talking to.
Moony
“Shit, Remus im sorry I thought it was him phoning again and I didn't think and Sirius left and he hasn't come back and I-” James put his hand up against his mouth “Sirius.” He started to hyperventilate down the phone and not making much sense of himself, he could hear Remus on the other end mutter a string of swear words.
“James I’m on my way overhang on” James heard Remus slam his apartment door behind him “And please close that door you know he’s not coming back for a while”
James walked over to the front door and kicked his shoes out of the way before slamming them behind him. He put the phone in his hand back on the kitchen counter walked over to the couch and sat down with his head in his hands allowing himself to cry, nobody could see him here. They can't see his weaknesses and use them against him. He could hear his phone at the other end of the room going off. He knew it was his parents, his manager, his performance coach and every single person who cared about him but all he cared about right now was Sirius.
Remus eventually turned up and let himself in with his copy of the front door key quietly closing the door behind him.
“Hey,” he spoke softly, sitting himself down next to James on the sofa. James looked up at him, his cheeks stained with tears. “Is this just Sirius?” Remus questioned.
James sat back on the sofa and took a deep breath before using the sleeves of his sweater to wipe his face. He looked back up at Remus and smiled. “How is it that you know me so well Moony”
“If I didn’t know you this well after racing against you for ten years I think you would be a little concerned James”
“I would think after racing against me for ten years you would remember to wear your actual team jersey and not the one Sirius lost four months ago,” James said, a smirk playing on his lips when Remus looked down and realised the sweater he had grabbed in the haste of leaving his flat was not the one he wanted.
“Don’t you dare tell him” He pointed at James smiling back at him. “I have £25 bet with him on it turning up at the motorhome when we go to Bahrain next week, I had a whole plan to sneak it back in. I just needed something to get me through winter break.”
James’ smile dropped at the mention of Bahrain, his eyes went down to the loose thread on his sleeve and pulled on it, the whole thread unravelling. He cleared his throat before looking back up at Remus, tears filling his eyes again. Silence fills the space between them.
“What if I don’t live up to the expectations again.” James finally speaks
“What if I crash into turn one and go flying over the barrier” Remus countered
“You’re world champion Remus, you’re not going to crash into turn one and lose your seat”
“And you’re James Potter. Having the title means nothing in this sport, you know that. You’re too hard on yourself. Last year was your rookie year, it is not your fault that Ferrari expects too much from their drivers and it sure as hell isn’t your fault that the media pushed the narrative you were going to get a top-five finish in the championship in your first year.”
“But-”
“No James. You finished 13th, that's seven better than the other drivers on the grid. It was your first year in a Formula One car. It took you two years to win Formula Two. Rome wasn’t built in a day. I was 10th in the championship for two years in a row before I came 2nd and then finally, last year I won. That's four years James. Four years of hard work and like you I was too hard on myself. I won’t let you make the same mistakes I did.” Remus grabs James at his shoulders forcing him to look at him.
“It’s so much Remus. The pressure from everybody. Everybody keeps telling me I’m doing fine and that I did great but I don’t see that from myself when I look in the mirror.” Remus pulls James into his chest, the taller of the two resting his head on top of his.
“You need to look in the mirror and start seeing a future world champion James, it will happen, I promise you. You are doing enough for the team and they don’t want anybody else. You are enough.” He pulls away and wipes the tears on James’ cheek.
“Ok fine, I won't tell Padfoot that you stole his jersey” His smile spreads back across his face “If you’re staying tonight the guest bed is still made and I have some spare gym shirts in the dresser in case he comes back and sees you in that.”
“I’ll have him in a McLaren shirt soon enough don’t even worry Prongs” Remus teased
“Orange would do nothing for his complexion”
“Actually, its Papaya” Remus shouted from halfway up the stairs.
—------------------------------------------
James was half asleep on the couch when he heard someone at the front door, he reached for his glasses and his phone and squinted at the time. It was gone two in the morning. James sighed and sat up, putting his glasses on and grabbing his sweater from the back of the couch. When he got to the front door he found Sirius sat fiddling with a bracelet on his wrist.
“Prongs!” Sirius slurred when he noticed James walking towards him, his face lighting up. “I didn’t think you’d still be awake, you know I met someone tonight whose name was also James. I told him there was only one allowed so I convinced him to change his name to John. John..I can’t believe he agreed to it” Sirius's eyes were glassy and bloodshot but he was giggling. If you didn’t know any better you’d think he was fine.
“There can be more than one James you idiot” James smiled sadly at his friend, shaking his head. “You need to be quiet, Remus is upstairs asleep and he has a flight in the morning for pre-season testing” James said quietly walking closer to Sirius and offering him his hand. At the mention of Remus, Sirius looked at the stairs straight away. James raised his eyebrow at Sirius looped his arm around his waist and started walking him over to the couch.
“Can you help me get this godforsaken bracelet off, someone put it on me in the club I think” James grabbed his wrist and had a closer look at it. You had to be joking.
“RL23?”
“That's what it says?” Sirius shouted pulling his wrist from James’ hand, leaving the bracelet in his hand. He quickly put it into his pocket to remind Sirius of this when he was sober.
Sirius was leaning heavily onto him, every step even more unsteady. He could smell the alcohol and cigarettes lingering on his breath, as well as the smell of mint that Sirius had had to try and cover up anything he had been doing. He let Sirius go and put him down on the sofa.
James got him a glass of water from the kitchen and handed it to him. “Drink this, You’ll feel better” He sat down next to Sirius on the couch, crossing his legs underneath him.
“Do you want to talk about-” James started
“No, I don’t, not tonight,” Sirius said before setting the glass down and rubbing his eyes.
James understood. This wasn’t the first time he had come home like this. His heart hurt for his friend. He wished more than anything that he could take his pain away from him and give it to someone worthy of that pain. He reached out and squeezed his shoulder, letting him know that he was there for him. Not that Sirius needed reminding.
“It’s just everything James. I’m so scared of it all.” Sirius's voice cracked.
Sirius looked up at him finally, tears staining his face. James could see how much pain Sirius was truly in for the first time in years. The weight of his family name that he has to carry around with him every single time he even steps into a car. James pulled Sirius into a hug and let him cry onto his shoulder, stroking his back soothingly. Eventually, Sirius pulled away rubbed his eyes and used his shirt to wipe the tears from his face.
“You’re never going to lose me, Sirius, I promise. We are the two drivers for the team we have worked for our whole lives. We are in this together, no matter what happens. Nothing can ever come between us. You will never have to find out what you would do without me because I will always be there. We are enough” James reached out his hand and Sirius stared at him and raised his eyebrow. “Don’t tell me you've forgotten our secret handshake Padfoot”
“We haven’t done this since we were 13 Prongs,” Sirius said while reaching his hand out and doing the secret handshake anyway.
“And yet you still did it” James poked his side making Sirius smile for the first time since the news.
“We should get some sleep, we fly to Bahrain tonight” He stood up grabbed a blanket and threw it over Sirius. James headed towards the stairs and padded up the stairs being careful to not wake Remus up.
“James?” A quiet voice spoke as he passed the guest bedroom. “Is he-”
“He’ll be ok” James smiled and nodded before going into his bedroom and crawling under the sheets.