Touch
Draco finished putting the sandwiches on a tray with the juice and walked back onto the patio with them. He set them on the table next to where Amira was sleeping. He had cleaned up their beach things and spelled away any sand. He had taken a nap next to her himself and woke up ravenous. It was probably only early evening but they'd flown right through lunch time. He had made sandwiches with the ingredients he'd found in the kitchen. It was all he'd really known how to make, and he wasn't going to call a house elf all of the way to Spain to make them a meal.
He sat next to her and combed a hand through her dry hair. He'd brushed it out for her before he fell asleep, not wanting her to wake up with knots. She hadn't even moved for hours. Her skin was tanning nicely, due to the sunblock, and he'd shifted her to her other side at one point so she wouldn't have horrible tan lines. He tried not to look at her body too much, as he didn't want to be inappropriate. Still, with her wearing only a swimsuit, it was hard to ignore how amazing she looked.
"Amira," he murmured, trying to wake her up. She shifted and tried to snuggle closer to him. He brushed his knuckles on her cheekbone. "Dinner time."
He didn't want her to sleep too long and become famished or dehydrated from all of the activity and time in the sun. Not to mention she was probably exhausted from her stunt earlier. He'd been furious before he realized she had not really been in her right mind. That light in her eyes scared him because it was so unhinged. He wasn't scared of her, but scared of what she would do to herself. She was like an addict desperate for another fix while still high out her mind on the first one. He could see that her body was failing her, especially after the way that she fell after she passed out hundreds of feet in the air.
He was incredibly impressed that she could fly so easily, but clearly it took a toll on her. He had been so relieved when she'd finally stopped fighting him, because if she truly decided to keep going, there wouldn't be much he could do to stop her.
Her eyes fluttered open and she looked at him groggily.
"Hello," he said, and he couldn't help but smile. She looked around, clearly unsure of where she was before she remembered. She sat up slowly, and Draco moved so that she would have room. "You hungry?"
She nodded slowly, "What happened?"
"You flew," Draco answered.
"I flew..." she murmured to herself. Draco prayed she wasn't about to run off and try it again. "Too much?"
"Yeah," he said, "Scared me."
"I'm sorry," she said. He was relieved that her voice sounded normal again. He reached for a sandwich. She copied him.
"It's alright," he said, "Everything's fine now."
They ate for awhile in a comfortable silence.
"This is good," she murmured, "Did you make these?"
He nodded bashfully, "I tried my best."
They finished eating as the sun started to set. The air cooled. He noticed Amira start to shiver, so he summoned one of his oversized sweatshirts. He handed it to her and then about died because of how adorable she looked when she had it on. He had to ignore the more devious feelings that appeared when he saw her in his clothing. He sat back on the large chair and positioned them so that she could lay back against his chest and watch the sunset.
"I can't believe we get to be here," she said. "It's so beautiful, I can't believe it's real."
"I wasn't sure if we'd be allowed," he admitted, "But I had to try once I thought of it."
"I'm so grateful," she said quietly. She held his hands that were resting around her. "I want to stay forever."
"Me too," he told her. He kissed the top of her head. It felt like they were in a whole other world. The war didn't seem real, and it had only been a few hours. They didn't talk anymore after that, they simply enjoyed each other's company.
When the sun was down, he felt Amira shivering despite his clothes and his body heat.
"Should we use the hot tub?" he suggested. She nodded and climbed off of him. She helped him carry in the tray from their meal. Before they went upstairs Draco poured two glasses of wine for them to drink. Amira smiled. She looked beyond cute in his clothes, sun kissed, and tired with her hair down. He led her up the stairs and cast the spell to start the hot tub.
He pulled off his shirt, and she did the same. She also tied her hair into a messy bun so that it wouldn't get wet. Draco climbed in first, and Amira followed.
They sat next to each other, sipping their wine and listening to the waves. There was such peace there. Draco felt fully relaxed.
"I'm going to ask for this place," Draco said, "I want this to be mine after the war."
"I'm sure they'd be happy to give it to you," Amira said, "You could come live here for a while."
He nodded. "I would love to do that. With you."
She looked at him, "You'd want to live here with me?"
"Yes," he said simply.
"But... that could be so far from now, what if you change your mind?" she asked. He pulled her to him with his free hand.
"It doesn't matter how long it is, I will always want you," he said boldly. "There's no one else."
"Draco," she breathed.
"I love you," he told her. He wasn't even scared of her not saying it back. It didn't matter. It was the truth.
He watched as tears welled up in her eyes. He wiped them away.
"No one's ever said that to me before," she explained. "Do you mean it?"
"I do," he said softly, "I've loved you for a long time."
"I think I love you too," she said. "I don't know if I know what love is for sure, but..."
"That's okay," he said, "I'll be here for you to figure it out."
There was a pause.
"Does this mean we're together?" she asked shyly. Draco smiled at her.
"Would you do me the honor of being my girlfriend?" he asked dramatically. She giggled and nodded. "Now you have to ask me."
"Draco Malfoy, would you be my boyfriend?" she asked with equal flair.
"Why of course," he smirked and then kissed her.
The kiss went from gentle to heated in five seconds. He took both of their wine glasses and set them on the hot tub ledge so that he could pull her closer into his lap. He ran his hands up and down her back and felt her tugging on his hair.
Their lips and tongues moved together at a fast pace and Draco felt desperate to have her impossibly closer. She was straddling his lap in very little clothing and he couldn’t stop his body’s reaction. He prayed she wouldn’t feel it because he didn’t want to stop or scare her.
Unfortunately, he could tell the very moment that she felt his erection. She froze. He pulled back from her and shifted so that she was still on his lap but sitting back from his hips.
“It’s okay, we can stop,” he said, “I’m sorry.”
He looked in her eyes to try to gauge how she was feeling. Her eyes were searching his.
“You don’t want….?” She asked quietly.
“I don’t want you to do anything you aren’t comfortable with,” he said, “Ever.”
“But…” she gestured down shyly.
“I’m very attracted to you,” he explained, “I can’t control that. But I can control my actions. And I don’t need to act on it. And I won’t.”
Amira looked down, and away from him. He didn’t like it.
“Tell me what you’re thinking,” he encouraged her.
She blushed. “I want to do things.”
“Ok,” he said patiently.
“But I get scared,” she admitted. “I don’t want to get scared, because I’m not scared of you.”
“I know,” he said, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear.
“I do want to though,” she said, “I also don’t really know anything.”
Draco considered that. He knew that she’d been abused and violated, but she really didn’t know anything about what a normal experience should be like. How it should feel, or how it should go. He himself had some experiences from Hogwarts, and previous summer breaks.
“Alright,” he said slowly. He was forming a plan in his mind. “What is it that scares you the most?”
He pulled her in just a little closer to try to comfort her. She rested her arms around his neck. It was very intimate, but no longer sexually charged.
“I’m not ready to have sex,” she said shakily. “But I don’t really know what else there is.”
“So we won’t have sex,” he said, “Not until you specifically ask for it. So until then, try not to worry that that’s what I’m trying to do.”
“Okay,” she murmured.
“I want to show you that it can be good,” he said. She just looked at him, uncertainty clear in her eyes. “It can feel good for you.”
She still looked at him, skepticism clear in her eyes. He decided then and there what he was going to do.
“I don’t want you to have to… touch me, or do anything for me until you really want to, and you’re completely comfortable,” he said, “And I know you aren’t right now. But I want to make you feel good, if you’ll let me.”
“But that’s not fair,” she protested.
“I think it is,” he said, “I get to do something that I really want, and you would hopefully enjoy it.”
“But…”
“If you don’t want me to then I won’t,” he said, “But if you do want it and you’re only worried about what would come after or me expecting something in return, then stop worrying. I only want to make you feel good.”
“Ok,” she said. He could tell she was still nervous.
“It’s late,” he said, “Let’s go inside.”
She nodded. The pair got out of the tub and dried off with towels. Draco went inside and put on pajama pants and opted to leave his shirt off due to the heat.
Amira came out in pajama shorts and a tank top, and Draco had to remind his lower section that they weren’t going to be getting anything that night, despite how good she looked. He truly didn’t want anything from her, he knew she wasn’t ready.
They turned off the lights and climbed into bed. He pulled her against him and they cuddled together. Luckily the room was cool enough that they could be comfortable being so close. She traced patterns on his chest, and he trailed his fingers up and down her arms.
She looked up at him then, and he couldn’t help but kiss her softly once. She smiled shyly in the moonlight. He loved it. He kissed her forehead. And then her nose. And then both of her cheeks. She giggled and squirmed away. He rolled on top of her so she couldn’t escape, and continued peppering her face with little kisses. She laughed but submitted.
Eventually she captured his face with her hands and pulled him into a deep kiss. This kiss was slow, unlike the one they’d shared in the hot tub. It was full of love and compassion, instead of sexual intensity.
They broke for air and Draco sucked and kissed down her jaw and neck, delighting in her little sighs. He propped himself up so she wouldn’t feel his reaction and used his spare hand to trace up and down her sides.
He kissed her again and caressed her arm, her ribs, the very side of her breast, and her stomach. Her breathing was coming faster and her kisses grew more passionate.
He carefully and slowly traced his hand down to her hips, and then her thighs, making sure to stay plenty far away from anywhere that might scare her, but close enough to continue to turn her on.
His fingers went up and down her body, feeling her relax further and further into the pillows.
His fingertips found the soft skin of her inner thigh and she shivered and gasped. He could almost feel heat radiating from her core. He kissed her jaw and purposely blew hot air on her ear.
“May I touch you?” he asked, surprised by how wrecked his voice sounded. She nodded after a pause. “Words baby.”
“I- yes,” she stuttered as he traced patterns higher and higher on his leg, “Slow please.”
“Of course love,” he murmured. He took her into a kiss again.
Ever so gently, he traced his fingers on her most private area, over her shorts. She gasped into his mouth, and he took that as a good sign after she stayed relaxed.
He gently slipped his hands inside the shorts, making sure to stay over her panties. It was hot, and damp and Amira jolted when he brushed over a bundle of nerves.
“Okay?” he asked softly. She nodded and let out the quietest little moan. Slowly, he started to add more pressure to the spot that was drawing out all sorts of little cute reactions. Her hips began twitching on their own, and he could feel her legs shaking.
He traced his fingers along the edge of her panties, “May I baby?”
She nodded desperately. He slipped his fingers underneath so he was finally touching her skin. Her folds were soft. He refound the spot that made her feel good.
“Draco,” she gasped on the first contact.
“What Amira?” he asked calmly. Her eyes rolled back as he started to apply pressure in little circular motions. He experimented with a few different speeds and pressures until she was reacting uncontrollably.
“Ah,” she moaned.
He dipped his finger down to her entrance for just a moment to gather some of the wetness there. With that, her reactions grew even more.
“Draco,” she moaned. She gripped his arm and the pillow. He kept kissing her, but she wasn’t kissing him back very well.
“What is it baby?” he teased.
“Feels - good,” she choked out. Her hips bucked for a second.
“Is it building love?” he asked. He knew it was hard for girls to orgasm, and he didn’t want to pressure her, but he wanted to know if he was doing the right thing.
“Y-yes,” she gasped, “It’s so much.”
Her eyes were closed and Draco had never thought she looked more beautiful.
“Just keep feeling it love, let it take you,” he encouraged. He continued doing exactly what he was doing.
After a couple moments, her breathing hitched.
“Draco!” she cried out, “I-”
“Good girl,” he murmured, “Are you going to come for me?”
She clutched at him desperately and her moans grew higher in pitch. Her hips were rocking on their own.
“Oh, oh,” she moaned.
“That’s it, come for me,” he encouraged. Her hips stuttered and then her entire body shuddered and she threw her head back silently. Her nails dug into his arm as she shook. Draco wanted the moment to last forever.
As she began to relax down, he withdrew his fingers, and whispered a quick cleaning spell. Then he kissed her slowly and caressed her face for just a moment before allowing her room to breathe. Her body shook with waves of aftershocks.
She opened her eyes slowly, looking dazed.
“Hi,” he said.
“Hi,” she said breathlessly, “That was…”
“Good?” he asked.
“Great,” she breathed. She looked like she wanted to say more but she couldn’t find the words.
He kissed her slowly. “I love you,” he murmured against her lips. Her kiss was sleepy, and it made his heart sing.
“Sleep love,” he whispered. She pulled him in close, and Draco tucked her against him so that he could stroke her hair. She fell asleep quickly, and Draco fell into sleep quickly after.
"I don't want to go," Amira said quietly as they looked at the portkey. It had been a good day. They'd woken together late in the morning and shared a few gentle morning kisses. Then, they'd made bacon, toast, and eggs for breakfast. They'd gone to the pool and splashed around before going back down to swim in the ocean. Amira had flown just a little bit, but kept it much more controlled than the previous day. They'd played with the dolphins, and gone diving deep under the water.
At lunch they'd feasted on fruits before getting side tracked.
Juice dripped onto her hands from the watermelon and mangoes that they were eating. Her skin was hot from the sun and the juice was sticky. She quickly licked it off of her wrist before it could make a mess. She sucked the rest off of her fingers.
She looked up and saw Draco watching her with dark eyes.
“It’s messy,” she defended.
“Right,” he said, voice sounding husky.
He took a bite of his fruit and she watched the juice fall down his chin and down his neck. Suddenly, Amira felt even warmer, and she understood his tone from the second before. She met his eyes and approached him.
She kissed him, and tasted the sweet and sticky juice on his lips. She followed it down his jaw and his neck, delighting in his sighs. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, just his swim shorts, and his hands caressed her bare skin that was only covered by a swimsuit.
“Amira,” he breathed as he pulled her back up to his lips. His hands found her legs and hoisted her onto the counter top of the island. She tangled her hands in his hair and pulled him close, wrapping her legs around his waist.
Her core was hot again, memories of last night flashing in her mind. He moved to her neck, sucking and kissing it as she gasped. His kisses set her on fire with need. He moved down her neck to her collarbone and between her breasts. He licked them where the swimsuit left them exposed.
To her surprise, he went lower, and licked and kissed her ribs, and her stomach. She felt wetness pool between her legs and could see that Draco was affected as well. It didn’t scare her today. Their conversation yesterday had calmed her nerves a lot, knowing they wouldn’t go farther than she was ready for.
“Let me taste you,” Draco rasped, looking up at her, “Please.”
The desperation in his eyes made it hard to deny him. He was tracing little circles on her thighs. She nodded timidly.
He checked her eyes for permission again before kissing her stomach and moving down her navel, until he was kissing her swimsuit bottoms over her mound. The heat and the pressure made her moan.
He kept her legs spread and used a hand to move her swimsuit to the side, so that she was completely exposed for him. Before she could get nervous, scared, or insecure, he dove in. He licked at her nub and her eyes rolled to the back of her head.
She grasped the table ledge as her body swayed and buckled, struggling to stay sitting upright.
“Lay down love,” Draco whispered, air brushing her most sensitive parts. She did as she was told shakily.
With that position, he had even better access, and he went to work. His tongue was hot and wet, and his lips made her feel high. If she had been feeling good yesterday, this was ten times better.
She was embarrassed by the moans and sounds that slipped past her lips, but she couldn’t keep them in. She felt so warm, like she was burning alive and Draco’s mouth was the only thing soothing her. His hands held her legs wide apart.
Before she knew it, an orgasm was approaching her. She’d never had one until the night before and she swore she’d almost died. This one was stronger, and had little warning.
It rushed over her and she cried out his name. She arched up as the waves crashed into her. Her body fell back against the counter top when it was over. Draco didn’t stop, but slowed just barely.
“Draco,” she whispered, flinching at the sensitivity.
“One more for me darling?” he almost growled. His tone made her body flare to life again. As soon as he could see she was okay with it, he continued.
This time, his tongue went lower, to her entrance. It started to soothe a different kind of ache that she hadn’t known existed. He switched back and forth between the two and Amira’s legs began to shake violently as a second orgasm approached.
This one was more powerful and less forgiving. She grasped his hair as it took her, and she screamed out his name. Her world went white and her ears rang.
“Good girl,” she heard him murmuring as he replaced her bottoms and pulled her off the counter to take her outside to sit in a chair in his lap. He cradled her as she shook with aftershocks.
Then, after another nap in the sun, it was time to return back to the UK and the cold manor. The war and reality. Their vacation was over.
"We'll be back before we know it," Draco promised, "And then we won't have to leave."
It was a potentially empty promise and they both knew it. They both had to survive all that was to come before they could get there.
"Ok, let's just get it over with," she sighed, "Will you stay with me tonight?"
"Yes," Draco said, "Can I stay with you for the rest of the break?"
"Please," she said. There was just under a week left. Then Draco would be gone for months and she would have to really focus on her tasks.
"Okay," he nodded. He tapped the portkey with his wand.
As soon as her feet landed in the Manor, it felt like the invisible weight of all of the pressure slammed back onto her shoulders. From the looks of Draco, he felt the same way. They weakly smiled at each other.
Amira made to go back to her room from the entrance hall but she stopped in her tracks when she saw Severus Snape waiting for them there.
"You wanted to speak to me?" he asked.
"Yes," she said, she turned to Draco, "Can you take up my things?"
He nodded and eyed Snape suspiciously, not bothering to hide his dislike. Snape nodded and waited for her to lead him to a room where they could talk. Amira was grateful that she'd put on more concealing clothing, though it still probably wasn't formal enough.
She led him to a sitting room, and warded the door after they were in. The Dark Lord wasn't in the Manor, but there were a lot of other people who she didn't want listening in either.
"How can I help you?" Snape asked formally as they sat across from each other.
"I understand you work with Dumbledore," Amira said boldly. It was no secret that he was a spy. She didn't want to talk to him about his potions credentials. She needed to know for herself which side he was on and if she needed to be careful of him, or if he could be an asset to her. This was going to be a delicate conversation.
"At the request of the Dark Lord," he nodded.
"Right," she said, "You attend the Order meetings, and you pass along messages."
"I do," he nodded, eyeing her carefully.
"Have the whispers of me gotten back to them?" she asked. "I have been gone and have not yet been updated by the Dark Lord."
Snape looked at her for a long moment, "There are... rumors, about a new, powerful person. However, as the Dark Lord instructed, your heritage is still a sealed secret."
"Sealed with a vow I'm sure?" she asked. Snape raised an eyebrow but nodded.
"Is that something you think Albus should know?" Amira asked.
"It does not matter what I think," Snape said, "I am a messenger."
"You have a lot of power," she said.
"As do you."
"Ah, but you have the power to change the course of the war, if you wish. You have the trust of both leaders," she said. "I just have magic."
Snape didn't speak.
"Do they trust you?" she asked.
"The Dark Lord always reserves healthy suspicion," he said slowly, "Dumbledore trusts me fully."
"Should he?"
"Obviously not," he murmured.
"What did you do to gain his loyalty?" she asked.
"I will not divulge," he said shortly, "You may ask the Dark Lord if you wish."
"Perhaps I will," Amira nodded confidently.
"What is it that you wish to learn from me?" Snape asked, turning the tables on her, "It seems almost that you wish to pass along a message yourself."
"If I did, why wouldn't I just ask the Dark Lord?" she challenged. She was reading his magic, face, and aura as carefully as she could, hoping she wouldn't misspeak.
"Why indeed?" he nodded. "Unless...."
"Unless I didn't want him to know, you mean," Amira stated bluntly.
"That is dangerous," Snape warned.
"I haven't said that I wanted that," she shrugged and sat back, "You brought it up."
"I would turn you in," he said quickly.
"Covering your tracks, smart," she murmured.
"I am being honest," he defended.
Liar, she thought gleefully.
"Of course," she soothed, "Anyways, to what I wanted."
"Yes," Snape nodded, looking tense.
"The Dark Lord is a busy man, with a lot on his mind," Amira said, "He is often... busy with tasks... or thoughts that take up a lot of his attention and focus."
"He is waging a war," Snape drawled.
"Of course, but sometimes I worry about him. He is so... overbooked," she said carefully, "I wonder, does he get enough sleep? It would be a shame for him to start making irrational decisions. He hasn't of course, but as the war picks up..."
Snape didn't say anything and watched her closely.
"Sometimes, I know that he is angered immensely by things that needn't stress him," she continued, "And I only wondered if some of those things could go to someone else to deal with. That way, he could focus on what's important."
"Are you attempting to keep secrets?" he asked quickly.
"No of course not, anything of note would go to him, and anything he asked would be answered," she said.
"What types of things are you referring to?" he asked. Snape was taking the bait far better than she had hoped. He was reading between the lines, and hopefully, he wasn't about to run to the Dark Lord to telltale as soon as they were done.
"Oh... just perhaps things you learn from the Order," she said, "Not their direct plans of course. But I'm sure there must be a lot of discourse in those meetings. Opinions shared that aren't listened to. Ideas... theories... things that aren't for certain. Things that we needn't bother him with, but things that we should still keep an eye on."
"Right," he said slowly, "So that if they come up, the right people would know what to do with it, and not be blindsided."
"Exactly," she said, "And... perhaps there could be information passed back to covertly... dissuade those things."
"And you are the right people?" Snape asked.
"I believe so," she said, "I am highly invested in this war and seeing the correct side winning. I know the Dark Lord well, better than most."
"You do," Snape agreed, "And would my godson be involved in this agreement?"
Amira looked at him, and felt certain that she could trust him.
"He does not know of it," she said, "But if he did... he and his mother would support it whole-heartedly."
"And his father?" Snape asked.
"Could be convinced, I believe," she answered.
"This is a dangerous game," he warned her.
"You play it well," she said, "I only wish to help."
"To help the Dark Lord win the war," he nodded though his face conveyed intense emotion. This was the final test.
"To help the Wizarding World be as it should be," she said.
There was silence.
"Well, I will be in touch then, when I have something to say," he said carefully. "Do you have proficiency in Occlumency?"
"I do, my mind is impenetrable," she said. He nodded, and his mask dropped, finally.
"If you are discovered, he will kill you," he warned her.
"I know," she said, "But I have to do what I can. Tell no one about me."
"I will not."
They didn't speak anymore. He swept out of the room and Amira sighed and fell back into her chair. One day of vacation and then she was right back into the thick of it, deeper than she ever was before.