Unleash Me
Amira found her uncle in the grand entrance hall. Without a word he turned and guided her back to the Dark Lord's study. She braced herself before re-entering. She'd only left this room a few hours ago, and she was not happy to be back so soon. She would prefer to never be back at all.
"Ah, Amira," the Dark Lord cooed when she entered, "Have a seat my dear. Yaxley, go gather the others in the dining room."
Amira did not look as her uncle left. She sat in the same seat as before, and sat rigidly.
"I have found a spell," he said, "It's simple really. It will force your magic to, for lack of better words, go to sleep. All of it. Even the parts that are blocking the rest of it. Then, I will wake it, suddenly and without warning. The block will not have a chance to put the walls back up before the rest escapes. The rest of it is desperate to get out, it will jump at the first chance."
"That's it?" she asked. It seemed too simple to fix a problem that had entrapped her entire life. There had to be a catch.
"Well, it is quite... dangerous to you," he said, "We need magic to survive, and if I put yours to sleep, your organs will immediately start shutting down."
"Oh," she said. There was the catch.
"You will be fine on that front," he said, "However there is the matter of your mind, when your magic decides to escape its confines as fast as possible. I am certain it will not be comfortable."
She didn't react.
"But that does not matter," he said, "I would not like to waste any more time. And this is the simplest and most effective solution. We can do it today."
Amira swallowed in apprehension. Her life would be changed after this. Either for the better, or for the worst. And most likely it would be the latter. She started to say goodbyes to her mental stability and coherent thoughts. She prayed to whoever was above that if it was going to be too much for her mind, that it would also be too much for her body. She did not want to survive it and become whatever it was that she would be with a shattered mind.
"We will go brief the others," he said, "I am not dealing with the after effects. Bella and Narcissa will take care of you until you are... better."
With that, he stood, and she followed him out of the room. They entered the dining room. The only time that Amira had ever been there had been earlier that day. He walked to the head of the table. Bellatrix Lestrange was seated to the right of the head chair, Narcissa Malfoy was next to her, and Draco was next to his mother. There was a space on the left, and then there was Yaxley and Pettigrew.
"Sit there," he commanded, pointing at the seat to his left. She took the seat. She was nervous with all of the eyes on her. Bellatrix was not hiding her stares. Amira kept her head bowed and eyes down as the Dark Lord explained her situation. When he got to the part of who her father was, Bellatrix screeched and leapt to her feet.
Amira quickly looked up to see the mad woman's wand pointed at her heart.
"Bella, no," the Dark Lord scolded calmly.
"But my lord, she's a Dumbledore," Bellatrix said, eyes wild and angry, "She must pay! I will-"
"Enough!" the Dark Lord said forcefully. Bellatrix put down her wand and pouted. "Sit down, Bella, if you disturb this meeting again, you will be dismissed."
Bellatrix sat down moodily and crossed her arms. She glared at Amira from across the table. Amira lifted her chin for the first time and met her dark eyes. This woman was a cruel, and horrible person. But Amira knew cruel, and Bellatrix didn't scare her. The Dark Lord wouldn't let any of these people hurt her.
At Amira's eye contact, Bellatrix snarled and leaned forward like a challenged dog, reaching for her wand again. The Dark Lord sighed and rubbed his temple.
"Bella, I said enough," he said tiredly.
"My lord," Bellatrix protested, "She's challenging me! She's trying to take my position."
Amira fought back a smirk at how bothered the other woman was by her refusal to submit.
"She is only looking at you," Yaxley said.
"She is challenging me!" Bellatrix shrieked insanely. Amira fought the inappropriate urge to laugh. She wanted to see how everyone else was reacting, but she didn't want to take her eyes off of Bellatrix's. It was amusing her too much. Maybe she was also insane already.
"You will stop instigating her, Amira," the Dark Lord commanded. Amira finally broke her gaze to look at him. His face was impassive, but not angry. There was a flicker of amusement there too. Suddenly her antics didn't seem so funny to Amira. She didn't want to find humor in any of the same things that he did. She cast her eyes down again, but kept her head lifted.
She listened as the Dark Lord explained the spell he would do, and the risks involved. He briefed Narcissa on the possible side effects.
"Should we wait for Severus?" she asked, "He is a far better healer than I."
"I do not wish for Severus to know of her yet," the Dark Lord disagreed.
Because he's a spy, Amira thought to herself.
"Furthermore, we have no time to wait, I do not wish to delay our plans for Azkaban," he said, "We will do the spell as soon as we gather the materials. Afterwards, Amira will have two days to recover and adjust to holding magic before her training will begin. Bella, I wish for your focus to shift to her."
"Not Draco, my lord?" she asked.
"Draco may attend, it will be good for him as well, and he may be able to help," the Dark Lord amended thoughtfully. Then he turned to Yaxley. "How encompassing is the vow?"
"The exact wording was that I ensure her needs are met, and oversee her until she is of age," Yaxley recited, "It is why I have needed to keep her with me instead of placing her with a muggle family."
"Yes..." the Dark Lord pondered, "I need you to begin working with the Ministry more, and I would prefer you to live closer to there. You living here is a security risk, should someone follow you home."
There was a long pause.
"If you... assigned her care to Narcissa, and came back to check on her say, weekly at first, would that count as overseeing?" the Dark Lord asked.
"I am unsure," Yaxley said, "If it pleases you, we could try."
"It would, I need you elsewhere," the Dark Lord said, "Formally, write a letter assigning her care to Narcissa and specify that you will be checking in periodically to oversee her."
"Shouldn't I specify weekly to be safe?" Yaxley asked cautiously. He didn't look very happy with this arrangement. Amira knew why. He was losing his toy. He wouldn’t be able to fuck her whenever he wanted if he lived elsewhere. She didn’t dare get her hopes up that he never would again though.
"No, in case the weekly isn't enough. And if it is, I would like to expand it as far as it will go. Perhaps monthly, or yearly." the Dark Lord said, "I do not like having my Death Eater's schedules dictated by their personal matters. It is inconvenient."
"Yes my lord."
"Narcissa, as she will be your ward, she will be moving to Draco's wing," the Dark Lord commanded, "That is all we need to discuss. Go write the letter, and Narcissa, grab some healing supplies."
The group nodded and dispersed. Bellatrix, Draco, and Pettigrew lingered awkwardly, unsure of what their lord wanted. Amira remained seated next to the Dark Lord. Her heart pounded as her anxiety at the coming spells grew. She didn't want it, but she didn't have a choice. She was going to have magic, no matter the cost.
When Narcissa returned, the Dark Lord instructed the others to stand far from the table, near the entrance.
"Get on the table, lay on your back, head towards me," he told her. Amira didn't argue, and climbed as gracefully as she could. She felt exposed and vulnerable laying in front of the Dark Lord. She was so scared, but didn't dare let it show on her face. She didn't even have time to wonder what the spell would feel like. The Dark Lord wasted no time, and murmured a string of latin. A beam of light shot towards her and engulfed her.
Amira closed her eyes as an impossible heaviness washed over. For one small moment she debated fighting to hold onto consciousness, but before she could, she faded to darkness.
Draco held his breath and the ultraviolet almost white light surrounded Amira. Her body lifted slightly and then fell, and seemed to curl in on itself only slightly. The Dark Lord paused for a moment. It was too long of a moment for Draco's liking. He knew Amira's heart, lungs, and organs were shutting down with every passing second. He was terrified that she wasn't going to wake up. Then, before Draco could panic any further, the Dark Lord cast the next spell, and the light turned orange. Amira jolted.
The orange light started to spark around her, and flickers of gold shot out towards the room before they disappeared with loud cracks. Soon they weren't even flickers of gold. It looked like an orange and gold fire was raging around her. No, it was coming from her. The fire was coming from her heart. Heat filled the room, and Draco grew worried that the wooden table she was laying on would be set alight. The magical fire grew taller and taller until it was scraping the high ceiling, a pillar of the most magnificent display of magic Draco had ever witnessed. He stood, so mesmerized that he almost forgot who the flame was stemming from.
Eventually it began to die down, and turn completely golden. The light was softer and softer until there was only a slight glow around her body. Finally, it was completely gone and she laid, seemingly unchanged on the table. The Dark Lord held out a hand, signaling for all of them to stay where they were. He cast a diagnostic spell over Amira's body, and appeared satisfied with the results.
"Take her to her room," he demanded, "And someone sit with her, tell me as soon as she wakes."
With that, he strode out of the room. Bellatrix hurried after him, as did Pettigrew. Yaxley came back with his written letter at the same time. He looked down at Amira's body at the end of the table.
"She died?" he asked worriedly.
"No, you would already be dead," his mother said with a hint of scorn, "Is it finished?"
"Yes, she's in your care now," he said, "I will be back to check on her."
"Yes, well, I will take good care of her," his mother said, taking the parchment and walking towards where Amira was lying still. Draco didn't miss the emphasis on the word 'good'.
"I will have her back, when this is all over," Yaxley said sternly, "If she is not yet of age."
His mother looked at the man coldly, "Perhaps."
Yaxley stood up taller and puffed his chest, "She is my niece, I will say where she goes."
"She belongs to the Dark Lord now, it will be as he wishes, and he wishes for you not to have her," his mother said, levitating Amira's body, "And I am happy with that decision."
Draco looked between them nervously. It was rare for his mother to so outwardly display her feelings towards people, especially inner circle Death Eaters.
As his mother rejoined them she said, "You must be going, you need to pack your things."
It was an order. And while his mother held no rank over Yaxley in the Dark Lord's eyes, she was still Lady of the Malfoy Manor and her words held power. Yaxley couldn't ignore them, and he turned on his heel and left angrily. When he was gone, his mother deflated slightly.
"Will you help me get her upstairs?" she asked. Draco nodded and followed his mother. He guided Amira's floating form so as to not hit the stair railings or any doors. Narcissa chose the guest room next to Draco's. She lowered her carefully onto the bed.
"Stay with her, I am going to put together some things for her and have the house elves send it up," she commanded before leaving the room.
Draco looked down at Amira, who looked to be sleeping peacefully. Her face was softer in this sleep than it had been in the library that morning.
Merlin, he thought, had it only been that morning? So much had happened that day, it had felt like years.
He sat down on the edge of the bed to look at her. He truly couldn't believe he'd ever thought she looked ordinary. For a very long time, he just looked at her. She was beautiful. Her hair was dark, but she had a warm tone over her skin that told Draco she spent a lot of time in the garden in the sun. Her skin looked so soft. He couldn't imagine anyone wanting to hurt her. He didn't know how her uncle could look at her and want to cause her pain. He reached out and brushed her hair away from her face. He let the back of his knuckle lightly graze over her cheek in a gentle gesture. Her eyes fluttered, and he jerked his hand back.
Her eyes did not open. After a moment they fluttered again.
"Amira," he said softly. "Are you awake?"
More fluttering.
"Can you open your eyes?" he requested quietly.
Finally, she started to blink open her blue eyes. She looked groggy and confused.
"Welcome back," he said. He felt a little bit awkward, sitting on the bed next to her, but he didn't want to move and startle her. He remembered the Dark Lord's words about her mental state. He also remembered he was supposed to call for the Dark Lord right away, but he wanted to give her a moment.
"Draco?" she said quietly.
"Yeah," he said, "How are you feeling?"
Her eyes wandered around the room, slightly unfocussed. It struck Draco that her eyes were somehow even brighter than before. Almost unnaturally so. Draco wondered if they would glow in the dark.
"Where?" she asked. Draco could tell it was hard for her to get the words out.
"You're in the guest room next to mine, it's yours now," he explained as simply as he could.
She gave a slow nod of understanding.
"I feel weird," she said, "There's.... so much energy."
"Energy?" he asked, brow creasing.
"It's in me, and all around," she said looking around the room again, as if she was hoping to see what she was feeling, "It's so much."
"I'm guessing that's the magic," he theorized.
"How do you concentrate at all?" she asked. "With all of this?"
"Er, you get used to it?" he tried. She started to shift, and sit up as she felt more awake. Draco remembered his orders. "I better call the Dark Lord."
He called a house elf and told her to relay the message. He also stood and took a more respectful seat farther away in the chair near the bed. He looked up to see her staring at him.
"What?" he asked.
"It's colder now," she said, drawing her knees into her chest, "Really cold."
"I can get you a blanket," he offered. She shook her head.
"Not like that," she said. "It's just so cold in this place."
She kept glancing around the room and Draco was suddenly a lot more worried about her mental stability. He wasn't feeling whatever she was, or seeing whatever she kept looking at. Her words were spoken well, but the meaning wasn't clear. He hoped that she was alright. He knew they had joked about her going mental, but he didn't want to lose his only friend here to madness. He'd only just got her. He wanted to know her so much more, and he couldn't do that if she ended up being clinically insane.
Suddenly she sat up straight and looked at the door intensely. Before Draco could further question if she was going mad, the door swung open, and the Dark Lord guided in, followed by his mother, and Bellatrix.
"You're awake," the Dark Lord said, "That's very good."
Amira didn't say anything, and just looked at him.
"You put on quite the show," he continued, "Very impressive."
After Amira still didn't talk, he looked at Draco, "Can she speak?"
Draco cleared his throat, "Erm, yes my lord."
The Dark Lord turned back to her, "How do you feel?"
His question was not one of concern, but one of pure academic curiosity.
"Strange," she finally said.
"Expand on that," he demanded, stalking forward to look at her.
She swallowed and looked around the room nervously. It was the first time Draco had seen her show any emotion while there were others in the room. Her eyes darted around to unknown things.
"There's so much energy, everywhere," she said, "B-Before, I could sense it when I tried, but now, I- the energy, I can't ignore it. It's intense."
She brought her knees back to her chest protectively.
"Hm," the Dark Lord looked at her calculatingly. "Well there is power coming off of you in waves right now. You're scared, and confused. You'll have to get that under control or your enemies will know every move you're about to make."
Draco felt that it was obvious that Amira was scared and confused just by looking at her. Then again, the Dark Lord seemed emotionless himself, and maybe he couldn't read those cues like a normal person.
The Dark Lord swooped in closer to her and grabbed her chin roughly. Amira tried to jerk back but he did not let her. Draco squeezed his fists and remained where he was. The Dark Lord inspected Amira's eyes.
"Incredible," he murmured, "My precious weapon. You will be great."
Amira recoiled as soon as she was released. Her breath started to come in pants and her eyes became wild as she looked around the room, almost searching for an enemy that wasn't there. The Dark Lord stepped back like she was contagious.
"Narcissa," he barked, "What is this?"
"My lord?" Draco's mother stepped forward as Amira started fully hyperventilating. Draco stood as well but was unsure what he could do about it.
"She's having a fit," the Dark Lord said, unable to look away from Amira, looking both disgusted and concerned in equal amounts, "Fix it."
"I think it's a panic attack," his mother said calmly, and summoned a calming drought.
"Caused by her magic?" he asked her.
"Not necessarily, though what she's feeling might have heightened it," his mother explained in that same calm tone, "It is common, especially for people who experience trauma young. Although, this could also be a part of the instability you mentioned as a side effect."
Draco's mother sat down and pulled Amira to her gently.
"Open your mouth dear," she instructed. Amira didn't seem to hear her, but nonetheless, she managed to pour the potion into her mouth with experienced practice. Amira relaxed back against the pillows within a few minutes. Her eyes were slightly glazed.
"My lord, how will I train her if this is how she is?" Bellatrix asked worriedly.
"She will get it together," the Dark Lord decided, "Draco."
Draco sat up straight as all attention was turned to him.
"The rest of us are going to be busy for the next few days with the escape. You will not be. You are close in age, you will help her adjust," he commanded, "Make her get used to magic."
Draco didn't know how he was supposed to do that, but he nodded. No one argued with the Dark Lord, and he wasn't about to complain about getting to spend time with Amira.
Then the Dark Lord turned to the women, "She looks like a squib still. Fix that. I wish her to look like a pureblood. She must look intimidating."
Bellatrix nodded giddily. The Dark Lord left the room without another word.
"Bella, shall we discuss what we need to do? Allow her some rest?" his mother suggested. Bella agreed. With one look to him, his mother left and Bella skipped after her, leaving Draco and Amira alone again. Amira was looking down at the bed spread.
"Amira?" he asked, and walked closer again. She looked up at him, and her eyes were filled with a fear that was muted by the calming drought. "What's wrong?"
"It's too much," her voice broke, "It feels too much."
She started scratching at her hands. Draco took them. She didn't flinch, and he was impressed.
"I know," he said. He didn't, but he wanted her to feel understood, "But don't do that okay?"
When he was certain she wouldn't start scratching again, he put her hands down.
"I don't know what to do," she said quietly, "How do I get used to this?"
"Why don't we take your mind off of it?" he suggested, "I'm sure this will all take time to settle. In the meantime, you can try to relax."
"How?" she asked.
"Well, you could read, or take a bath," he said. "I'm sure it would be good for you to eat as well."
"I don't know," she whispered. Her eyes were drifting away from his face again, looking at things only she could see.
"Let's go to the small library," Draco decided. Amira didn't seem to have heard him. She was looking at the ceiling.
"Amira," he said gently, and tapped her hand. She looked at him then. "Let's go to the small library."
She nodded. Draco stood and gave her room to get off of the bed. She stood, shakily. Her eyes darted around faster then. Draco started walking to the door and stopped when he realized she had as well.
"What's wrong?"
Amira stood in the center of the room. She was looking around as frantically as she could while under the influence of calming drought.
"It's worse moving," she whispered. "So much worse. I feel like I'm going to fall."
Draco had no idea what she meant. He walked back to her.
"I'll make sure you don't fall, come now," he coaxed. She took a wobbly step, as if she didn't trust the ground in front of her. "Good."
They made it out of the room slowly, with Draco right beside her the whole way. In the hallway, she was worse. Draco was shocked when she reached out and grabbed his hand, but he held hers, and helped her across the hall to the small library where they had their chosen books. He held her hand all of the way until she was seated in the cushy chair that she liked.
"Thank you," she said as she looked all over the room. It was a little unnerving, the way her eyes never stopped moving. Draco picked a few books for her and gave them to her. He then made to sit down a ways away and give her space.
"Can you sit closer?" she asked softly. "It's just, I can tell what's your magic, it's easier if you're closer. You don't have to."
"No, no, if it helps I'm happy to," Draco said honestly, getting a thrill out of her wanting him closer, "I was worried it was making it worse."
She shook her head and then opened a book. After that, the two of them fell into silence as they both read. A few times, Draco noticed her looking around in that panicked way again, and he would assure her everything was alright, and she would go back to reading. Eventually, he looked up, and found her sleeping, curled in the chair around her book. He smiled slightly and stood.
He figured it would be best to get her back to her own room. He could have levitated her, but it felt cold. Besides, he didn't want to wake her up with that rush of magic that she would surely feel intensely. He lifted her gently, and carried her back to her room. She was light and very easy to carry. Draco wasn't the most buff boy in his year, but he was tall and Quidditch had given him more than enough lean muscle to carry her small frame.
He tucked her carefully into her covers, and then quickly retrieved his book from the library. He retook his seat in the chair next to her bed so he could watch over her. It was definitely past dinner now, but he didn't want her to be alone when she woke. It was still early enough that she probably would wake again before night. Draco turned his attention back to his own book.
Draco was startled awake with someone shaking his shoulder.
"It's just me dear," he heard his mother say. The room was dark, and he realized that he had fallen asleep in the chair next to Amira's bed.
"Oh," he said.
"Go to bed, I'll watch over her for the rest of the night," she whispered. Draco knew better than to argue, and his neck and back were quite stiff from how he had been sleeping. He stumbled to his feet, and walked, half asleep still, back to his room. He tumbled into his bed and was asleep before his head even hit the pillow.