Chapter 21
Gilriant sat on one of his favorite trees and perches, watching the people of Imladris go by. The intricate dance of daily duties and favored pastimes. He knew at any point he could run through that pattern and they would simply make room for him. Include him in their activities or just flow around him. Like a swaying dance that was so instinctive they didn’t need to know the steps ahead of time.
He liked that the people were slowly taking in his oddities in stride. Harry really wasn’t fond of when the dance froze up, that happened most often when he interacted with new people. The ones that got overwhelmed by the details of his life. To be fair, a part of him liked being provocative with what he said and did. Just to see how they would react and treat him. Would he ever feel comfortable enough to stop testing the people around him?
One thing he wasn’t too thrilled about was when people got hung up on what bloodlines he came from. Sure, his family was important and he embraced his heritage. But that’s not what he wanted people to know about him first. Yet he was literally running around showing it off all the time. There must be a way to balance that out. So he still could carry his family with him, without drawing everyone else’s attention to it? This was the time he missed being able to cast notice-me-not on things. Or, could he still?
There may be equivalents of his wizarding spells that translated into what he could do here. He hadn’t tried for the most part because it felt like a discordant note. But if he could transpose the melody into something that fit, would that work? The best chance he had to do that would likely be the circlet that he brought with him. It would also be the one thing he most wanted to make, not less important, but less that it defined how others thought of him. A notice-me-not wouldn’t completely hide it, they would still see the sign of rank, those strong enough would see right through it completely. Those that already knew about it, it wouldn’t affect at all. What could do was make the heraldic devices stand out less to people that were not looking for them.
The problem was he would have to take the circlet off to see if he could do that. That could have his gift spilling out all over the place. So he would need someone to cushion him. Gilriant really didn’t want to explain to his family why he was essentially hiding his blood ties in some fashion. He really did not want to hurt them, Harry couldn’t be sure they would totally get what his issue was.
While he was wrestling with this, Hallows came trotting around the corner with Haldir following her. The elf appeared to be carrying several things, including a large container of arrows along with a few tools. The white wolf sat down right under his perch, and the marchwarden took a seat on the bench next to her. Putting his equipment down, he started pulling the arrows out to inspect. Some he simply put to the side. Others he grabbed tools and started to work on.
Curious, the elfling climbed down from his perch and settled sideways on the bench facing Haldir and watching him work. Without looking up from his work the marchwarden started calmly explaining what he was doing. What to look for that showed an arrow needed repair, and different things to fix it. After a beat he added. “I have a friend in Lothlorien that owes me a rather large favor. I told them to ask no questions, but send me what I needed for a bow your size. When you are ready of course. Those lessons certainly shouldn’t be left to anyone else.” He didn’t quite sniff but it still made Harry laugh. Which made Haldir faintly smile.
“Now are you going to tell me what’s bothering you?” Harry blinked at the question then looked down at Hallows. Ah yes the wolf did lead him here. Which would make sense that Haldir would pick up on that something was bothering him. Still he hesitated thinking it over. The marchwarden just kept working quietly on the arrows.
“You know how you keep saying I need to know myself?” Haldir inclined his head in response to Gilriant’s question. “Before, where I was born. So many people thought they knew what I was like because of what they thought they knew about me. About what I supposedly did. About my parents. About who they thought I should be. Like a story. All before anyone actually met me.” The marchwarden kept working as Harry talked. Yet the elfling could tell he was paying close intention to his words.
“I hate it when people stare. I don’t want people to look at one surface part of me and decide that is who I am. I want to try something that will make the circlet I am wearing less important to people that see it.” He struggled a little to put it into words. “It won’t make it invisible, it won’t affect people that already know about it, it won’t stop someone that is actively looking. It will just make it not important to the people that aren’t looking for the details of it.”
Haldir was silent for a moment, clearly thinking over what Harry told him. “Like camouflage.” A fissure of relief went through the elfling. Camouflage was something that happened in nature all the time. Trying to fool predators, or predators trying to blend in in order to ambush prey. Not that he wanted to ambush anybody, but avoid predators, yes that he would like to do.
“Yes,” Gilriant nodded. “But in order to figure it out I need to take the circlet off. So I need someone to help me . . . cope. It works like a filter, and focus. Keeping everything from being too much.” At that Haldir paused. While they may have talked about it before, Harry wasn’t sure he put it in such bald terms. “It's a good tool for now, but we are going to need to wean you off it when you get older. Or at least see what it does when you start gaining your own control.” That was a really good point. He hadn’t thought about it that way. Only time would tell. “Will you help me then?”
“Are you trying to hide?” The question almost made Harry laugh. “There is no hiding for me. I stand out and I know it. Not trying to hide. Just trying to make sure when people look at me, they are looking at me.” That is what it boiled down to. He wanted to matter for himself. Not just where he came from. Some of it he couldn’t escape. Really this wouldn’t do much, except make him feel a little better.
“I do need to know what you feel like without that circlet on you anyways. During our lesson later today I want you to take it off.” A wave of relief passed through Gilriant. Not only had Haldir listened, he hadn’t judged him for wanting it, and was willing to give him the opportunity to try it. The marchwarden handed him an arrow. “Now, tell me what’s wrong with that.” With a smile Harry slowly inspected it, verbalizing what he found as he did so.
It was likely the best idea to try it during a regular lesson. Anyone that might pick up on the power, already knew that Haldir was working with him. So it wouldn’t be completely surprising if something leaked. They sat as they typically did, barefoot and cross legged facing each other. This time Hallows was partially in between them, and Tindil filled the other part of the space. The pieces of Gilriant’s magic touched them both. At Haldir’s nod, he lifted the circlet off his head and took it into his hands to study it.
For a brief moment, he wondered if it had been a mistake to take it off. Gilriant could feel his power start to spread and flood the area around them. Then Haldir leaned forward burying one hand in Hallow’s fur, and the other rested on the elfling’s leg. The feeling that flowed around him was warm, encompassing, and strong. Not unlike the lesson where he broke down and cried and the marchwarden held him. A strength outside his own that he could lean into as he needed.
While he could tell Haldir could not match him in strength, that part didn’t matter. It was the other elf’s maturity and skill that was balancing him out now. Anchoring him and his ability so he didn’t get washed away in it. Gilriant couldn’t tell exactly what the marchwarden was getting from him. Really that part didn’t matter. There was harmony in that moment and that was all that was needed. So Harry got to work.
In the end it ended up being a very simple matter. The circlet seemed to be already set up for it. Just waiting for a bit of direction from him. Which both amused him, and made him think he should have anticipated it. His friend certainly had foreseen the potential need. While a part of him missed her fiercely, he was also comforted to know he had her blessing to be here and grow into himself. With a smile, Gilriant put the circlet back on his head.
Haldir inhaled and let go, leaning back. “A good thing we are under the wards of Imladris.” Studying the elfling he added. “If I am not around and you need to take that circlet off for whatever reason, send Hallows to me. Or try leaning on your family. Glorfindel is likely to be able to help as well.” It was a very good thing the magic on the circlet made it comfortable for him, or anyone he was leaning on.
It occurred to Gilriant the reason it was easy to make that small modification there was already something on it to make people ignore a few things. Like he hadn’t removed it for even bathing. Just worked around it. As it was very open in design, it didn’t cause any issues for things like that. There was no problem managing his hair. How metal could be so comfortable he had no idea. He put it down to being a Luna thing. Eventually he did want to be able to take it off, maybe even leave it off at times.
“Good thing you are teaching me control, right?” He smiled up at Haldir. The marchwarden looked like he was going to say something in return, but then his focus turned towards the path to their spot. Gilriant twisted around to see what had his attention. Soon he could see the familiar golden figure of Glorfindel heading towards them. “Hi Shiny.”
“If I’m shiny, I’m not quite sure what to call you. I can’t exactly call you by your Grandfather’s name.” The statement had the elfling shrugging. “You’ll always be shiny to me.” That actually triggered a half-formed idea of a potential prank. He’d have to think about that more later. “Are you checking up on us?” He couldn’t think of another reason for Glorfindel to be out here.
“Elrond was in the middle of something delicate so he sent me. There was a rather noticeable flare of power and he wanted to make sure everything was okay.” Well, very good thing all his lessons were under Imladris’ wards then.
Gilriant tapped his circlet. “This helps me keep things contained, so Haldir needed to see what I look like with it off.” He gave a small frown. “If I’m that bright I should call the wolves back and siphon some of it off tonight.” The elfling looked over to the marchwarden. “Do you think that will be okay?” His teacher was the one monitoring his progress anyways. And apparently the one with the common sense.
Haldir gave him a sweeping look and then nodded slowly. “Yes, but we should halt the lesson for today then. There are other ways to deal with things like that but you need to be further along for them. So that is part of the purpose of the wolves? Not just as guardians?”
Tilting his head to the side. “Did I not explain them?” Granted that night had been pretty intense. Gilriant gathered his thoughts. “I chose, to take on a responsibility that includes bringing all of Ea back into balance. I did not know how big the job would be until I got here.” The elfling admitted quietly.
“Much of what should be here has either been drained away or corrupted. The power to restore that I already have, but my body is too young to handle it. I need to learn more.” Honestly he had to really think about this. For this was all knowledge that came with his acceptance first in his world, and then after he arrived here. While he explained some, it was entirely possible he missed a few of the finer points as it was all . . instinctual for him to understand it.
“The power wants to be used, the land wants to heal. So I needed an outlet that would allow the power to be used, but not require me to be directly involved. The wolves were always going to be created.” Here Gilriant looked a bit sheepish. “Just not so soon, and not that many at once.” Which is why Namo was exasperated with him. True it was for a good cause but it didn’t negate that he implemented it early.
“I . . .” There was the tiniest of nudges. Not physical but more on his magic and he broke off his words and blinked at Haldir. The marchwarden just lifted an eyebrow. “You started reaching when you talked about the wolves. Remember to keep yourself separate unless you really need the power.” Well that was frustrating, but also the point. So he nodded and slowly breathed in and out working on clearing his head and keeping it all under wraps. The two adults waited patiently.
“Right, so I don’t need to work hard to put power into the wolves that already exist. They are built to siphon it, use it, to cleanse corruption of all kinds and put power back into the land.” Now he grinned. “Which is why they are wolves, because some forms of corruption can fight back.” That got a bark of laughter out of Glorfindel.
“And the name Starlight wolves?” He shrugged at the captain. “The room all the fea took refuge in before we came here is called the Room of Stars. All of Grandfather’s descendants had star names.” The entire elven race was born under starlight. So he had plenty of reasons to use that name. “Varda liked it.” At the calm nods he decided they were at least getting a little used to some of his crazy.
***
Thranduil did not know what to make of it, and that displeased him.
Of course he was pleased with the effects that had come from the power that washed over the land. The Greenwood had a vibrancy to it that had been slowly seeping out of the edges. Oh it was always green, the trees healthy, and the animals flourishing. But it lacked that vitality he remembered from his youth. When the refugees of Doriath settled there. Yet now a glimmer of it had returned. This was to be celebrated of course.
Yet he could not be completely comfortable with it. It was a force that came outside his forest. It was affecting the Greenwood and everyone within it. What if it had a more sinister goal that would later hurt his people? They entrusted him with safeguarding their lives and the community they had built here. He would protect it.
If it had been a one off occurrence he could have accepted it and moved on after time passed. But it was not. There had been a second, albeit much weaker wash of energy over the land. A ripple of positive energy that made the trees sing. Was this something to lull them into relaxing their guard?
While some might think he was being pessimistic or paranoid, Thranduil had his reasons for it. Rarely did forces coming from outside his forest end up actually benefiting the Greenwood. That made it difficult to accept this was completely benign. Not without knowing the cause behind it. Only then would he be able to relax.
Then the reports of these strange new wolves began to come in from the scouts. While he preferred to only concern himself with the Greenwood, he wasn’t going to spurn knowledge of the outside world. It could affect his forest as this obviously was. These wolves, and they were some type of wolf and not the twisted beasts the orcs deigned to ride, were unlike anything he had heard of before. The reports said their coats literally shined with multiple small points of light against a dark colored pelt. Like stars in the night sky. The light even seemed to hurt the goblins and orcs. That was what they hunted and rooted out. Anything of the twisted and corrupted creatures that would hunt and harm his people. On the surface, a good thing.
At least until they were spotted within the Greenwood. Not once attacking any elf, or even reports of them hunting the wildlife. Which made no sense as their reported size was such they could stand shoulder to shoulder with him. Such creatures would need large prey. Oddly the wood seemed to flourish even more after they had passed through. Thranduil did not know where they came from, why they were in his forest, or what their ultimate purpose was. If they had stayed outside, he may have tolerated that. But they had come within his borders.
This time, he went himself to see. True he could have just taken the reports of the scouts. Could have accepted they were beneficial. But something just didn’t sit right with him about it. Thranduil couldn’t say exactly why, but he felt unsettled. So he would determine for himself their nature. He needed no trail, nor escort to make his way swiftly through the wood. Nor was he a fool to be on foot when facing them. He was perfectly capable of getting a good look from above.
If anything the reports downplayed the light that came off the creatures. They shone with an intense brightness that lit up the area around them as they raced in and spread across the forest. It may be a pure light, and true he could neither feel nor see anything malignant, but elves had long ago learned that sometimes bad things came in pretty packages. He couldn’t trust them yet.
***
Things were relatively settled in Imladris. The residents were getting used to the rather unique elfling that was now in their midst. While they still could be surprised by him, it didn’t disrupt the flow of life. So of course, this is when Gandalf showed up.
Mithrandir was a regular visitor to Imladris, coming and going as a welcome figure whenever he showed up. The elves knew despite his outward appearance that he was a being of great power when he chose to utilize it. They also knew he was just as likely to find delight in a sweet treat or an afternoon sitting in the sun. What they did not know was how their newest residents would react to their longtime friend. Which of course made for some great speculation, gossip, and perhaps a bet or two.
Of course the speculation came from people that did not know Gilriant’s history. The elfling remained rather closed-mouthed about his past. Gil-Galad knew the most, but he wasn’t there. Yes he talked to Maglor about some of it. There were parts though he wanted to just shove behind him and never think about it again. Likely not the healthiest of methods, but who was going to know? For most of the elves, what he had been put through was frankly, inconceivable. So of course no one actually thought to warn the elfling about the istari.
When Harry dashed into his brother’s office to talk to him he stopped dead as soon as he spotted the newcomer. Frozen, he just stared at the old man with the long gray beard. Granted his robes were gray and not some sort of garish color and pattern. But he did have the faintly jovial mannerisms that made the elfling’s feet feel stuck to the ground. And the weird hat. Can’t forget the hat.
“Ah Gilriant I’d like you to meet - Gilriant?” Elrond was quick to pick up that something wasn’t quite right and he got up to move towards the elfling. Before he took a step both phoenixes burst into being. One with flames and the other in a shower of snowflakes. Hedwig had been growing but with an elf’s strength there was no problem with her perching on Harry’s shoulder. She almost glared at the stranger, extending one wing over her chick. Fawkes landed near the stranger giving him a curious look and trill.
Harry had not faced all his complicated feelings about Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledor. Now, he had a reel of strong memories flipping through his head. Most prominent was the last one that Snape had shared with him. His life was manipulated for one purpose. The old wizard might have been considered to be doing the right thing for many people, but not for him.
This superficially old man radiated power, much like his former headmaster once had to a lesser degree. The fact that the old part he could tell was essentially a facade didn’t exactly help either. An image projected, perhaps to seem wise, or harmless when he was anything but. He was more timeless in the way elves could be, without the matured but youthful appearance. A false front.
Suddenly his vision was completely blocked by white. Hallows was directly in front of him and large enough to completely hide behind. The white wolf’s ears were back and a low warning growl reverberated from her throat. His magic, not attacking, but warning the old man to stay back. He blinked.
“Gilriant, little brother, you are safe here.” It took a moment for the words to penetrate the musical Sindarian when part of his brain was expecting english. He had no idea how many times they had been repeated. Harry blinked again and turned his head to see Elrond kneeling down by him. His brain picked up the worried trilling from Hedwig. “He, he looks like someone I once trusted.”
Elrond’s expression was serene, but he could pick up on a faint tightening of the older elf’s expression. “But not anymore?” Harry slowly shook his head, “No.”
Tindil nudged him, clearly concerned and he reached out a hand to the fawn. “M’okay.” Not entirely surprising to him that both pieces of his magic found him here. One protective, the other confused and concerned.
“Clearly not.” He recognized the voice of the one that spoke and he turned towards it, lifting up his arms. “Atar”
Maglor picked him up, and Harry curled up in his arms. He let the bard do what he wished for many times as a child. Carry him away from the source of his distress and comfort him.
Elrond sat down in his seat heavily. It had become more rare to see signs of the damage from his brother’s first life peeking out. This was a blatant crack, which he could not see the cause of yet.
“Elrond my old friend, I do believe there is even more going on here than I thought.” The istari had been looking at the doorway through which all but the firebird and the lord of Imladris left through. A sigh escaped the elf. “Sometimes more than I know,” He replied.
The firebird, Fawkes regarded them both before opening his beak and starting to sing. There were no words, yet the music wove a tale. It spoke of a long conflict and days full of fear and destruction. Leaders that were convinced they were doing the right thing. Of those that were hurt in the process on both sides. Of life, death, and broken triumph. Not a song of comfort, but beautiful all the same. When it ended he dipped his head at them and flew off.
Later, much later, after explanations and conversation Galdalf sat smoking his pipe in one of the gardens. His head was full of many thoughts, including that of the council that Elrond admitted may need to happen sooner than he planned for. His role in middle earth was to be an advisor. Helping support, or lead as the case may be, those that would decide the fate of middle earth. Yet right now his head was rather empty of any advice.
Noticing movement out of the corner of his eye he waited and the elfling slowly moved into his line of sight. Still he sat and smoked, letting the young one decide what he wanted to do. While no adult shadowed his steps, the white bird was on his shoulder.
“I know you are not him.” The voice was quiet with an edge of certainty cutting through it.
“I am not. And I would hope I never would be the cause of pain like you have had before in your life.” The elfling seemed to be considering his words.
“Then I ask you always keep these things in mind. There is a saying in the world of my birth. The road to destruction is made with good intentions.” Gandalf set down his pipe looking at the little one as he continued. “To remember that sometimes the needs of the many is not right to outweigh the needs of the few. The greater good, is not always good, and those that are considered to be wise are not always right.”