Learning Limits
The next discussion ended up being slightly larger than they originally thought it would be. And instead of the family wing, it ended up being in the healing halls. Haldir’s room to be more precise. While he was healing rapidly, most would rather err on the side of caution and not set back his healing by trying for a meeting elsewhere. Which meant that only two of Gilriant’s new friends were in attendance. Hallows who alternated between spending time with the elfling and the marchwarden, and Tindil.
While some might protest animals being in the Healing Halls, it was very obvious that these were not ordinary beasts. Not just to those that saw the summoning. For their contrasting coats as well as sharing the same eye color as Gilriant. Hallow’s size shifting was observed by more than one person. All elves could sense power to some extent, and both creatures carried it. That and they accompanied the elfling made them easy for others to overlook as being part of the group.
As having not been part of the previous meeting both Celebrian and Haldir had been given a quiet accounting. Both what was discussed at the meeting and the summoning. The context was important considering they needed to understand the background, in order to truly comprehend the rest. At least by this point Haldir no longer thought he might be hallucinating.
While some might wonder why he had been included in the group, the marchwarden instead spent his time observing. The patterns of behavior for the elfling, the family, and the creatures. Haldir certainly planned on integrating any new information given, he had a suspicion just why Hallows decided to claim him. He would just wait to hear what Gilriant had to say. Or least he would wait up to a point.
Gilriant’s bout of nerves had him choosing Maglor as his perch of choice for this meeting. Sure he could make a point by sitting by himself but he was starting to figure out which battles were ones he wanted to pick. Pride or practicality being one. It had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that he wanted to be close to the one person that already knew everything about him. He just wanted to reassure his Atar he was okay.
Maglor was only mildly surprised by his seating in the group. Gilriant had dragged him over to the chair by Haldir. The fawn by his right side and the wolf between himself and the marchwarden. Fawkes on his shoulder and of course Hedwig staying with her chick. While Arwen and the twins were having some sort of playful disagreement over who got to sit next to the elfling, Celebrian claimed the seat for herself. She gave a wink to the young one. With a mock sigh at his children’s antics Elrond settled on her side. The twins ended up on the other side of the healing patient to keep an eye on him. Arwen, Glorfindel and Erestor taking the remaining seats around the room.
Correctly interpreting Gilriant’s imploring glance, Maglor started explaining what happened with Harry. How he gained the skills needed to make passage possible. As well as what Namo told him and his perspective. The gift of the circlet and its purpose, the phoenixes, the trip itself. What he knew of the elfings time in Valinor. While did this the young one mostly focused on petting Tindil and Hallows.
When his Atar finished speaking, Gilriant quietly spoke up. “I’m not supposed to, strictly speaking, use the, um, extra stuff too much. Namo laid down a bunch of rules. I might have sort of bent them a little?” His gaze flicked around the group before going back to focus on Tindil. “See I had talked to Yavanna and Varda about creating the wolves and I was going to wait a little bit before I tried making them. But it was an emergency”
While most of them processed exactly what Gilriant said, Glorfindel asked in an unflappable tone. “So you already had a plan for them?”
Gilriant gave a jerky nod. “Yeah. For a couple of reasons. I’m supposed to just spend time growing up right? But I couldn’t not help. So I thought having the wolves would do two things. It would let me have a way to help people and spread out some of my extra . . . stuff. Also let me keep to the rules of not using my gifts too much.”
“You said you thought of the wolves, what about the deer?” Celebrian asked gently. Gilriant gave her a shy look and she offered a soft smile in return. He was still working on getting to know all his relatives. She seemed nice.
“Well no, the deer happened when Tindil did. And um, Hallows is different too, special. They are more like, pieces of my magic.” Thinking it over, Gilriant paused, putting his hand and looking Tindil in the eyes, focusing as he tried to reach to get more information. Only to have a gentle finger poking his forehead interrupting his concentration.
“That is quite enough of that young one.” Looking up in surprise Gilriant saw Haldir dropping his hand back down, placing it on Hallow’s soft fur. “I do believe I know why your friend here has decided to claim me. Or at least I know part of the reason why.”
The marchwarden gave the rest of the group a faintly amused look as he arched an eyebrow at them. “The rest of you are all Noldor elves. Which in itself is not a bad thing, it does mean you might be missing something far more obvious to a Silvan elf such as myself.”
Tilting his head, Gilriant regarded Haldir with curiosity. “There is a difference?” It was Erestor that answered. “Very much so. Many of the differences are cultural and historical, but not all. Silvan elves often have a deeper connection to nature if I am correct. Studying the differences can and should be added to your lessons at some point.”
Much to the scholar’s surprise, that actually seemed to cheer the elfling up. “Yes please! I said before that I have so many questions.” The Senechal gave him a slight smile, “Well I am always happy to have an eager student.”
Gilriant turned his attention back to Haldir. “So, what’s obvious to you?”
“That you need some independence should be clear to everyone. What is clear to me is the reminder that despite whatever mental maturity you may have, your body and skills relating to it are still that of an elflings'.” Haldir shot a look at Elrond. “Which I am sure is obvious to Lord Elrond there once he thinks things through. We have all been through some shocks lately. This is a unique situation that we all will learn from.”
Looking back to the elfling Haldir continues. “Your connection to nature is strong, so you need to establish deep roots. Which takes time, practice, and knowledge. Without them, no matter how strong your gift is, much like a tall tree with shallow roots, you can and will come to harm in a storm. I am not unfamiliar with connections similar to yours, though I suspect yours will be one of the strongest when you are fully grown.”
Maglor’s hold on Gilritant tightened, protective. “And with his ability already being so strong, what does that mean?”
“That he needs support, or an anchor if you want to think of it that way. Someone that can both monitor his growth, and take the pressure off when needed.” Haldir’s head tilted as his gaze resettled on the elfling. “And perhaps keep you from overreaching and causing yourself harm.”
“Which is likely why Mandos set down rules.” Glorfindel quietly commented. “The Valar do not think like elves do. What may be obvious or instinctive to them they might not know they need to explain. The reason behind the rules may be obvious to them.” Having spent time among them before being sent back to middle earth, he could understand them better than most.
“I cannot say. What I can say is that the experience the Silvan elves have is that the stronger the connection, the bigger the need to not be completely immersed in it during the early years.” The marchwarden let them absorb that and continued, focusing on Gilriant. “You need to know who you are, and have a solid, strong understanding of that. Which only comes through experience and growth. Without that, the gift can shape you, instead of you choosing how to wield it.”
“I see what you mean by anchor, to keep him from going too deeply in it or lost in it.” Elladan mused. “What kind of connection is this between an anchor and the person they are watching over?” Came Elrohir’s shrewd question.
“But, how do I know I’m using it? I mean, there are so many different things. How do I know what and when?” Gilriant asked with a frown before Haldir could answer Elrohir’s question..
“That is where I come in. Either in person or through Hallows here. As she is literally part of your magic from what you said. How she took shape and maturity level means something. It could be said the older, more experienced part of your magic recognized you needed outside assistance.” Haldir calmly replied, scratching the white wolf behind the ears, much to her delight. “As for the kind of connection, commonly they are between close kin.”
“Which you are not,” observed Arwen. “So how does that change things?”
Haldir is silent for a moment. “I cannot say. As you cannot predict what shape a tree will grow into when it is a seed, I cannot see it now.”
“Above all else Haldir is a guardian of Lothlorien. Of the forest. He has always been strong in that and I can think of no one better.” Celebrian said firmly. “I know him, we all do to some extent. I also wonder if whatever makes Gilriant a Keeper of Balances put him in the position to be claimed by Hallows. He was not originally part of my escort but my mother insisted he join us.”
“I think we all agree that you are trustworthy Haldir. We seek to gain understanding so we know how to help moving forward.” Elrond interjected. Only to be almost screeched by Hedwig. “Though you may need to gain his other guardian’s approval as well.” He added with a trace of humor.
“But,” the elfling’s started to look distressed. “That’s not fair to Haldir, nobody asked him, Hallows just did it.”
The marchwarded blinked in surprise at that and leaned forward to Gilriant, despite the abortive movement of Elrond to try prevent him from doing that. “Little one, I didn’t need to be asked for something like this. It is an honor and a privilege. I long ago chose to be a guardian of the forest, and this is part of it. You could not have been given a gift this large without having the potential for being a great guardian when you are grown. To be able to make sure you reach that? An honor beyond any price.”
With a not quite sigh Elladan reached to gently guide Haldir into leaning back again. “You are still on restriction. Don’t put pressure on your wounds and undo Ada’s hard work.”
“I’ve been getting extra assistance.” Haldir replied mildly with a nod towards Hallows. “I think you can drop some of that vigilance over me.” Celebrian laughed. “Tell that to someone that has not seen you attempt to escape healers long before you should.” Elrond gave a long suffering sigh. “I am afraid that is the case with most patients I have to deal with. Regardless of the fact if they just listened they would be healed up and released faster.”
Haldir decided to ignore that for the moment. “The point is, if you need me to say it, I choose this too. I have no desire to walk away.” He looked over to Celebrian. “Though we will need to talk to your parents, my Lady. They are going to need some sort of explanation as to why I am not immediately returning. Though considering current events they may just come here.”
Looking pensive, Celebrain considered the manner. “We may be able to delay them for a short time. We can tell them some sensitive matters need to be resolved.”
“While true, I dare say we will not be able to prevent a council from gathering sooner than we originally intended.” Erestor admitted dryly. “Especially with the new factor. If these Starlight Wolves are seen in the Greenwood, King Thranduil may demand an answer.”
Gazes shifted to Gilriant and he shrugged. “They will go where they are needed, that is their nature. To seek out and destroy corruption and protect the innocent.” He considered. “The deer will be staying here, at least until Tindil is grown, however long that takes.”
Considering the fawn, Hildir reached out with an open palm. After a moment the young deer moved closer inspecting it. He let them, not trying to touch more, letting the young creature dictate the interaction. “I do believe that Tindil represents the young prince’s growing magic, and will age as it does. Which will be helpful in monitoring.”
Gilriant sat up straight. “There is that word again! You were going to explain it.” He twisted to look at Maglor with an expectant look. There were a few amused looks at that. The siblings seemed to be making some sort of bet between themselves.
Reaching to gently tap the circlet the elfling wore, Maglor started, “Remember when I said wearing this may help prevent them from trying to put another on you?” Gilriant gave a wary nod. “Well, with your elven blood strengthened, it brings you even closer to those Houses you descend from. Those that use that title for you are simply acknowledging it.” Which immediately earned him a scowl from Harry. He knew exactly what the bard referred to. It wasn’t just the House but the ties to a crown. “No.” There were some bemused looks exchanged around the group at the young one’s refusal.
“If I may?” Erestor started, which had Gilriant’s attention swinging around to him. “Elves will know, refusal on your part changes little. From what I understand, that which you have already chosen for yourself, when you are an adult carries a far heavier responsibility than any other rank.” The elfling sat back against Maglor, scowl still in place.
The bard wrapped an arm around him firmly. “I know you have had bad experiences with those that gave you titles in the past. This is not the same. They are acknowledging the families you come from, something you already want.” This clearly did not mollify the unhappy elfling. “Not want, walls, between me and other people.”
“Uncle,” started Arwen, “This will not stop us from seeing you or caring for you.” While it might be considered odd among men for one of her age to call someone dramatically younger than her uncle, it mattered not to elves. Eventually the apparent age differences would be smoothed out by time. The muttering coming from the elfling showed this clearly did not resolve everything, he did refrain from further protests.
“For now we will have to wait for others' reactions before we can make further plans regarding any councils. Haldir, your willingness to help Gilriant is much appreciated.” Changing the topic Elrond inclined his head to the marchwarden who returned the gesture. “Is there anything else you think we may need to know?”
Haldir’s hand dropped back to Hallows as Tindil wandered back to poke the elfling with their nose. The unhappy elfling uncoiled enough to start petting the young deer, giving the marchwarden quick looks. “There are many trails this journey may yet follow. Some of it is highly personal. What the young one chooses to share of this, is up to them.” Haldir said firmly. Then a trace of humor colored his voice. “Though I may judge you if you try to force the young one into shoes all the time. While I agree they will be needed at times, for the most part you will need to let him be without them.” When the bard gave him a questioning glance. “It is part of him, connecting to nature around him. It will help prevent him from actively seeking it out with his gifts.”
The elfling studied the marchwarden, and the interaction with Hallows. After a moment he seemed to make up his mind about something. Keeping one hand on Hedwig he reached towards Celebrian who leaned over to scoop him up with a pleased smile. Gilriant leaned in to whisper softly something to her before sitting back. Her smile only grew brighter. “Of course! Let's have some fun, there has been enough serious and stuffy matters for the moment.”
She rose from her seat, carrying the young one. “Come daughter, we have something to do.” With a bright smile Arwen got up as the twins protested. “We like fun things too.” Their mother paused to look at them. “I think everyone is well aware of that. You may be invited along later. If you behave.” They swept out of the room, Tindil trailing behind. Gilriant’s soft and hesitant voice could be heard asking questions of them.
When they left Maglor gave a sigh and slumped forward. “I feel like a fool and a failure. Though that is a feeling I am well versed with.” Hallows left Haldir’s side to come over and place her paws on his seat enough to push herself up to reach his face and lick it. Then settled down with her head in his lap. From Maglor’s shoulder Fawkes gave a comforting trill and attempted to preen his hair.
“Atar, you are too hard on yourself. How were you to know all that?” Elrond interjected, moving to the seat his wife vacated. “And yet your brother is my Valar blessed responsibility to guard and guide. I risked letting him harm himself by my actions. Far too many have been harmed by my hand in the past.”
Glorfindel and Erestor exchanged a glance, before the golden haired warrior spoke up. “Past harm being caused by Morgoth’s trickery, corruption, and failure to either seek or listen to other council. True, you willingly took the Oath when you could have been a voice of reason against it. Also true you did not think through what actions you may have been forced into because of it. While past deeds cannot be undone, it is clear you have learned from them. You are seeking the wisdom of others in your task.”
Elrond reached over and took his father’s hand in his own, turning it to show the unblemished palm. “Eru has forgiven you, and given visible signs of it that any can see. While your fea still bears the scars of such actions, you do not walk this path alone. You have us here to help you along the way. Trust in us, even if you have difficulty trusting in yourself.” Elrohir spoke up. “Though I can’t promise to keep you away from mayhem, just to keep it more to the mischief kind than any other.”
Picking that moment to speak up Haldir aired his thoughts. “While I was not directly affected by your actions, those I have lived with were. I am still learning of the current circumstances. It is as they say what you do now that matters, it is that by which I will judge you. You have given me plenty of reasons to give you that chance. Nor do I judge you for not knowing that which you could not have known.”
Maglor shook his head slightly. “I do not deserve forgiveness for my past misdeeds.” It was Erestor that had a response to that. “Forgiveness is not something that is deserved. It is something that is granted. Sometimes it is most difficult to forgive ourselves than to have others do it for you. You need to learn to accept those that will.”
Elsewhere in Imladris the small group swept down the hallway towards a particular destination. Upon spotting Lindir the lady of the House gave him a bright sunny smile. He smiled back inclining his head, “Lady Celebrian how can I be of service.”
“We are going to have a tea party, the fun kind, not one of the stuffy boring ones. Could you possibly bring us proper food and drink to my solar?” Noting the shy and cautious look given to him by Gilriant in Celebrian’s arms, he gave an elaborate bow hoping to amuse the young one.. “Whatever other kind would anyone want to have? Your wish is my command, my Lady.” A trill from Hedwig clutched in the elflings hands had him adding. “And of course, proper refreshment for you as well Lady Hedwig.” He saw Tindil peeking around the elleths, “Everyone will be taken care of.”
“Our thanks,” She looked down at Gilriant. “Would it be alright to invite others?” At his hesitant nod Celebrian looked back to Lindir. “If you could let your wife know her company would be welcome, yours as well if you have time.” His smile warmed, “I will let her know and I will be happy to make that time.” He turned to carry out those orders.
Arwen grinned. “Oh good, Mellessin always has the best gossip in Imladris.” Turning to head into a brightly lit room, windows open to the outside Celebrian corrected her daughter. “Information gathering, that is what it is. It is important to know what is going on in the community of course.” She sat at a table, keeping a hold of the elfling even as Gilriant set Hedwig down. “Arwen get some hair clips too if you could. We can have some braiding lessons after.” The dark haired elleth’s eyes lit up. “Yes of course!” Tindil settled down behind Celebrian’s chair.
Harry tipped his head in curiosity. “Braiding is a big thing I think? Atar was always insistent on braiding my hair for things.” Celebrain nodded as she made sure he was settled comfortably. “Very much so. Different braids mean different things. They can show status, or if for say you are an archer, or blacksmith and any kind of job. Braiding styles also differ from place to place. Those knowledgeable enough can tell just by looking at someone’s braid where they hail from, what they do, and even potentially something about their family.”
Practically dancing over to the table, Arwen set brushes and clips over to one side. “Most of the time, braiding another's hair is only done by family or close friends. Or by those particularly skilled at it for special occasions.”
Lindir reappeared followed by others bringing in and setting up food on the table, in time to hear at least part of the conversation. “Though I dare say anyone would be more than happy to let you practice on them my Prince. Especially as an elfling. They would likely drop everything and then wear it as a badge of pride.” He made sure to set a plate and cup by Hedwig, acknowledging her trill of thanks with an incline of the head. A prepared plate and bowl by the fawn as well.
“Oh, tea party and braiding?” A sunny haired elleth almost seemed to fill the room with her happiness as she joined them. She paused to lightly touch Lindir’s hand as he smiled at her. “So it seems my love. Though I do believe you were also thought to be the best to help our young Prince know more about the inhabitants of our city.” He pulled out a chair for her to take a place next to Hedwig. “Oh thank you very much for inviting me. This will be fun.” Mellessin beamed a smile.”
There was a faint grumble from the elfling and Arwen laughed. “Gilriant has expressed displeasure at others using that title for him. We have started to try to explain that it's not a bad thing.” Lindir looked positively baffled by this. “Why would it be a bad thing? ‘We’re honoring your family ties and acknowledging what you are.” He started pouring the tea for everyone before settling in his own seat between his wife and the daughter of the House. “Plus,” Mellessin added. “It can be a valuable tool for you to use when helping others.”
The elfling perked up a little, making sure Hedwig had some berries on her plate. “Tool? How can it help?” Accepting the small sandwich Celebrian offered him, he nibbled on it as he listened.
“People pay attention to ranks like that, it affords a certain amount of respect. It means they are more inclined to listen to you, as long as you do not abuse it. Of which I very much doubt you would.” Mellessin pointed out. “Erestor would be the best to explain that to you.” Gilriant continued to nibble on the snacks thinking it over.
“Celebrian says you know everything about everyone?” He asked. “Well not everything just some important things.” Arwen laughed at her response. “She’s being modest. Always the best gossip between you two. Come, tell us the going ons.”
Thus began some cheerful hours and soon to be a fun tradition amongst them. A happy time full of laughter and relaxation. Afterwards, Lindir and Mellessin were seen around Imladris sporting braids with a few small sparkling white feathers that were donated. While they were not quite as tightly done as could be, they very much were the envy of other elves.