Bright Water

July1982

Regulus lay on his back in bed, the soft scent of lavender from the green bedspread filling his nostrils. His gaze was fixed on the ceiling, as if he could find answers to his questions in the gray-white clouds of paint. The room was quiet, but the sound of cars still found its way in. The walls around him held many years of secrets, and now, as he lay there, it was as if they whispered old stories of loss and betrayal. He could hear the sound of Pandora and Dorcas downstairs, enjoying each other’s company, their cheerful conversations and laughter drifting up through the floor. It was a comforting sound, reminding him of how well they got along, even though their friendship was still relatively new. It was a comfort in this period of uncertainty.
Regulus’ thoughts wandered unwillingly back and forth between memories.
Good and bad. Old and new. Vague and clear. Regulus’ thoughts lingered on his father.

Orion Black.

He had been dead for three years. After his death, Walburga Black, his mother, had moved to France. His father’s death hadn’t affected him in a normal way. It wasn’t grief that filled him, but rather a sense of relief from the merciless pressures his father had placed on him. There was no room for weakness or doubt in The Noble House of Black. There was nothing noble about this house. It was dark and gloomy, filled with childhood trauma and trauma in general. Regulus had been forced to adapt, and that required unconditional loyalty and perfection. Even though he didn’t feel grief over his father’s death, he felt a sort of disappointment. It was tied to the day Sirius left them. It was a heavy day, a day when everything Regulus had known and loved had been shaken to its core. Sirius had been his brother, his friend, his protector. But it wasn’t just that which made it so terrible; it was the way their family had broken both of Sirius’ legs right in front of him. That experience was a knife that cut deep into Regulus’ heart. That day, he was forced to watch as his brother screamed. Regulus remembered how his father’s face was a mixture of anger and satisfaction, and how his mother had watched without stopping the horrific scene. The painful sound of bones breaking, Sirius’ cries, and his own helpless feelings had haunted his dreams ever since. It wasn’t just the injury to Sirius that hurt, but also what followed. After that day, Regulus realized that his own family had turned into enemies, and every time he thought of them, he was reminded of the terrible choice they had made. It was no longer about making them proud. It was about surviving in a world where he felt completely isolated. Regulus was disappointed because his father hadn’t suffered a more grim death. Orion deserved it. He deserved death, but it had been kind to him. He died of a heart attack. How lame.

Then there was his mother. She was a strong figure in his life, and her expectations of him were like an invisible chain that bound him to a fate he didn’t want. Her wishes for him to join the cult hung over him like a dark cloud. Although she left him alone for now, Regulus knew that she was always waiting for the right opportunity to take him to France. It was a constant threat, a reminder that he could never be completely free from her power.

Regulus sighed deeply and rolled over to the other side, his face buried in the worn pillow that still carried traces of a time long past. Memories and scents from his childhood crept in, and a sudden painful longing washed over him. If only he had said yes when Sirius had suggested they run away together. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to—quite the opposite. His whole being had screamed for freedom, for an escape from the suffocating grip their family had on them. But for Regulus, it was never a real option.
Losing Sirius, the rebellious and troubled eldest son, was one thing. He had never lived up to their parents’ strict expectations, and his rebellion had become inevitable. But losing both their sons, their two heirs, would have been a catastrophe for the family, and Regulus knew that only one of them could escape this hell alive. As much as he longed to follow, his love for his brother was stronger than his own longing for freedom.
Regulus had let Sirius go, knowing that his brother had to believe that he had chosen them over him. It had torn at his heart to know that Sirius probably hated him for that choice. But if it meant that Sirius was safe, Regulus could live with the pain, even though it bit deeply into his soul. In his quiet moments, he often thought about whether Sirius would ever understand why he had done what he did—whether he would ever forgive him for the sacrifice he had made.

The image of Sirius’ face, determined and full of hope, stood clear before him.
“We can’t stay here, Reggie,” Sirius had whispered one night, when the wind outside made the trees scream. “If we stay, they’ll crush us both.”

With his face buried in the pillow and his heart heavy with the shadows of the past, Regulus let a single tear slide down his cheek as he whispered a silent prayer for his brother’s happiness. Maybe that was enough for now. Maybe it was all he could hope for in a world that had taken so much from him.
And God, they had done so many fun things together. They had built little fairy villages in the forest floor. The houses were made of leaves, sticks, and small pieces of wood. They had developed societies together. Sirius must never find out that Regulus had let him go. If he did, there was no telling how hard it would hit him.

Regulus would get his revenge.
He would justify the loss of his brother, and it would not be mild. He would take revenge, and the planning started now.

Dorcas POV:

Dorcas sat on the soft couch with Pandora. They had both had a few glasses of whiskey, and Dorcas could feel the warmth from the golden liquid spreading through her body. Laughter filled the room, echoing off the large chandelier. Pandora’s artistic soul had taken on the task of decorating Dorcas' face with festive makeup. It wasn’t ordinary makeup—Pandora had selected the most vibrant colors and painted Dorcas' face with a blend of glittering purple, neon pink, and electric blue. The colors looked fantastic against her dark skin. Dorcas couldn’t help but giggle every time she saw herself in the mirror.

"You look absolutely fabulous," Pandora laughed, handing Dorcas the mirror so she could admire the colorful masterpiece her face had become.

"Yeah, fabulously crazy!" Dorcas replied, spreading her fingers so Pandora had better access to apply the nail polish. "If I go out looking like this, I’ll probably have everyone staring." Her thoughts drifted back to Marlene. Shw would stare, that was a fact. Her blonde hair falling in various lengths. She had recently dyed the tips pink. Her red lips and long eyelashes. They had been together for almost a month, but only the night before had they agreed that they were a couple. It had been an amazing evening!

They were both out at a playground in the middle of the night, where the cold air mingled with the warmth of their laughter. Dorcas had protested loudly when Marlene dragged her there, but she hadn’t done much to stop her. Marlene had that kind of energy that Dorcas couldn’t resist.

They sat together on an old, creaky swing. Marlene gently pushed Dorcas' swing with her foot and smiled at her under the dim light of the street lamps. "Come on, admit it!" Marlene said with a laugh. "You’ve always dreamed of hanging out at a playground in the middle of the night."

Dorcas shook her head but couldn’t hide her smile. "Oh yes, it’s really been my life’s dream," she replied sarcastically, pushing back with her foot to swing a bit higher. "But if I catch a cold, it’s your fault."

Marlene laughed and jumped up from her own swing. "Good, then I can play nurse. That’ll be a new role for me."

Dorcas rolled her eyes, but before she could respond, Marlene suddenly leapt onto the crossbar of the swing set, balancing precariously but with wild excitement in her eyes. "Dorcas," she began in an overly dramatic voice, as if making a grand confession. "we’ve been dating for a while now, and I have to ask... Are we girlfriends? Or am I just the crazy girl you hang out with at playgrounds at night?"

Dorcas looked up at her, a mix of surprise and laughter on her face. She hadn’t expected that question right then, but it still felt so typical of Marlene to ask in such a playful way. "Well," Dorcas began, standing up from the swing. "if I’m willing to freeze out here in the middle of the night and watch you balance like a circus performer, I think we can call ourselves girlfriends."

Marlene laughed triumphantly as if she had just won a big prize and jumped down from the bar. She landed clumsily but grabbed onto Dorcas to avoid falling. "So it’s official? You’re my girlfriend now?"

Dorcas laughed and nodded while holding onto Marlene. "Yes, it’s official. Now, get down from those swings before you hurt yourself."

Marlene pulled Dorcas into a quick, warm embrace before releasing her with a teasing smile. "Okay, girlfriend, how about a race to the slide?"

Dorcas shook her head, laughing, but she already knew she would follow, just like she always did when Marlene led them on their little adventures.

It had really been a wonderful evening, and Dorcas was more eager than usual for the others to meet her. She knew it would be difficult now that Sirius was in Marlene’s band.

"Do you want the same color on the other hand?" Pandora managed to break through to Dorcas, bringing her back. She had finished painting Dorcas' right hand. Maybe white would look good on the other?

"Nah, just stick to blue." Pandora nodded and continued. Her face was a mask of concentration, but it broke into a smile. Pandora ran her finger over Dorcas' newly clipped nails.

"So, what about that Marlene girl? Does she make you happy?" Dorcas could feel warmth spreading from her cheeks down her neck. Fortunately, it was well camouflaged under all the makeup. Pandora laughed loudly and sat down next to Dorcas with a satisfied smile. "Tell me about her again. I love hearing you talk about Marlene."

Dorcas leaned back and looked up at the ceiling, where the light from the small lamps cast gentle shadows. "Marlene is amazing," she said dreamily. "She plays guitar like a dream, and when she’s on stage with her band, she’s just... wow. I can’t get enough of her. She has such strong energy, but at the same time, she’s so gentle and sweet when we’re alone."

Pandora smiled, and Dorcas searched for any sign of sorrow or jealousy. Pandora had confided in Dorcas that she didn’t like people. At least not in that way. Sure, she had had crushes here and there, but never anything she would act on. She was fine just looking at someone and knowing they would be happy with someone else. Dorcas didn’t know if Pandora was satisfied with this, maybe she wanted to be in a relationship. But from the genuine happiness on her face, it didn’t seem like it.

"It sounds like you’ve really found something special," Pandora said, patting Dorcas on the shoulder. "Have you met any of her bandmates?"

Ah, so Pandora knew about Sirius.

Dorcas shook her head and smiled. "Not yet. It’s mostly just been the two of us. It still feels pretty new, but also really right, you know? I’m excited to see what happens."

Pandora nodded understandingly. "You’ll do great. You have a good sense for people."

They laughed and each took a sip from the whiskey bottle. The sound of the doorbell quickly brought them to their feet. Pandora gave Dorcas a stern look.

"Don’t you dare ruin your nail polish, stay here!" She walked out of the living room and towards the front door. Dorcas stayed where she had been ordered, but she still tried to listen in on the conversation unfolding in the hallway.

"—We’ve been knocking on doors all night, but finally, we found someone who would let us in! I was starting to think I was homeless." Barty!

Pandora laughed softly, her voice always warm and welcoming. "Hey, Barty. I thought it might be you causing trouble out there." So Dorcas had been right.

"Trouble? Pandora, that’s a polite word for it. Barty here has probably made half the building think there’s a madman on the loose." Evan!

Dorcas was starting to get good at recognizing their voices. They had visited a lot since that night they found out Regulus was back in London. When they were all together, Barty, Evan, Regulus, Dorcas, and Pandora, everything was perfect. Dorcas had found her group. Her people.

Barty immediately responded without missing a beat: "A madman? I’d rather say an undiscovered comedian. The world just hasn’t realized my genius yet."

Pandora opened the door a bit more and stepped aside. "Come on in before you scare the neighbors away. We do need a little peace and quiet."

Dorcas could hear their footsteps approaching, and she couldn’t help but smile to herself. They had a way of bringing chaos and laughter with them everywhere, and she knew the evening was about to get even more entertaining. The first thing Dorcas saw was Barty’s green tuft of hair at the front of his head. It only just covered his forehead, and then the rest of his hair was brown. Behind him followed the other two. When Barty saw all the equipment scattered around Dorcas, one of his eyebrows shot up. The one with the piercing.

"Hey, Dorcas," Evan said in a loving but teasing tone. "What are you up to? Has my sister forced you into this beauty salon?"

Dorcas giggled, waving her newly painted hand at him. "Something like that. We just needed a little girl time."

Barty jumped up and down, always hyper. "Why am I not a girl? I would totally rock skirts and makeup better than any of you!"

Evan laughed, but Pandora and Dorcas exchanged a look that said, are-you-thinking-what-I’m-thinking? Apparently, they were because one of them sprang up while the other started talking.

"Barty, what if you didn’t have to be a girl to rock makeup and skirts?" Pandora suggested. And Dorcas knew exactly what she meant. This was going to be fun.

"Barty, if you sit down next to Pandora and let her do your makeup, I’ll go get some skirts! Then you can rock the whole thing."

Evan burst out laughing. He literally doubled over with laughter, tears in his eyes. "I always suspected you’d be irresistible in makeup. I can’t wait to see if my fantasies were right."

Dorcas amused herself inwardly at how red Barty’s cheeks became. They turned the loveliest shade of red, quite noticeable against his pale skin. Whether Barty and Evan were together, no one really knew.

“So, is that a yes? I’ll grab a couple of tops and skirts. Anything else you want me to bring?”

Barty blinked and looked up, puzzled. “I… uh…” He cleared his throat and tried again. “Yeah, please bring some… hair accessories too.” Dorcas laughed but quickly dashed out of the room. This was going to be something to see. With quick steps, Dorcas half-ran up the stairs. The staircase was long and had a green carpet covering its steps. She took two steps at a time and could feel the cold railing against her palm but let go quickly to pick up speed. Excitement bubbled in her stomach, and her steps were light and fast. When she reached the top of the stairs, she turned smoothly to the right, her feet flying across the floor as if she were in a voluntary race against herself. Her breathing was slightly faster, but it wasn’t from exhaustion—it was pure enthusiasm driving her forward. She approached her room with a crooked smile on her lips, almost as if she was delighting in her own speed. With a fluid motion, she grabbed the doorknob, swung the door open, stepped inside quickly, and slammed it shut behind her with a satisfied feeling in her body. Okay, clothes for Barty. Dorcas opened the top drawer of a dresser and pulled out one item after another.

The first one she grabbed was a short skater skirt made of soft fabric that almost seemed to float when she held it up. It was covered in a wild pattern of pink, orange, and yellow, reminiscent of an explosion of sunsets and flowers in a tropical dream.

She set it aside and pulled out another skirt. This one was also short but had a more edgy design. A deep electric blue shimmered in the light, and the asymmetric hem gave it a bold look. Small silver studs adorned the edge, adding a raw yet stylish element. It would look great on Barty. The last one was a red denim skirt with an integrated belt. Perfect! Now she just needed some tops. The top drawer was closed, and the bottom one was opened. She pulled out a red lace camisole for the first skirt, a black top with trumpet sleeves and white stars on the edge of the neckline for the blue skirt, and a black crop top for the last skirt. It all would go so well together! Dorcas glanced at herself in the mirror and admired her makeup before heading back into the hallway. As she was almost to the stairs, she remembered that she had forgotten the so-called hair accessories. She hurried back and into the bathroom. There were many bathrooms in the house, but Dorcas and Regulus shared one now. So, they stood brushing their teeth in front of the mirror together each night while Dorcas laughed at how Regulus sounded trying to talk with toothpaste in his mouth. She took a small container down from the top shelf (Regulus had the bottom one because he couldn’t reach the other), and looked inside. Yes, it was the right one! It had a bunch of hairpins and interesting things in it. As she looked up, she saw Regulus’ reflection in the mirror. He smiled faintly at her.

“Reg, won’t you come join us? Barty’s trying on my clothes, and Pandora’s doing his makeup. Evan’s here too, and we miss your company.”

There was something in his posture that made Dorcas think he had been crying. It just didn’t seem like Regulus to cry. But if he was sad, it was Dorcas’ job to cheer him up! He had done so many things for her, and she wanted to give back.

“I could put some eyeliner on you? Just a subtle shade around your captivating eyes.” It had been proven several times that Regulus looked absolutely amazing with eyeliner! He smiled. Not everyone got to see that smile, but Dorcas did. Dorcas had looked past his range of different masks. She had seen him, and so this smile was special.

Regulus kept his smile on his lips, even though it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“I’ll come down in 10 minutes,” he said gently, almost as a reassurance but without revealing more.

It was typical of him—always reserved, always the one who hid his feelings behind a smile. Dorcas knew this was as close as he’d ever come to admitting that something was wrong. She nodded with a small smile back, knowing she couldn’t push him further.

As Dorcas turned and left the bathroom, she was filled with a mix of determination and warmth. She had been able to see through Regulus' facade, but she knew it wasn’t easy to break through to him. She couldn’t force him to open up, but she could do her best to show him she was there for him.

Dorcas returned to the living room with the various outfits and hair accessories in hand. Pandora was already busy decorating Barty’s face. His eyelids were adorned with three different shades of purple that blended beautifully together. It really suited him, and the vibrant color would highlight his bright eyes. Pandora worked with great care, and Barty seemed to enjoy the attention, despite his slight nervousness. Evan, who had been observing the whole thing with a small grin, looked at Barty with a crooked smile. His smile reached all the way to his eyes, giving him an enchanting look. Yet there was a hint in his gaze. A hint that Dorcas had come to know well over the past few weeks. She knew what it meant.

He leaned in towards Barty and whispered in his ear, in a voice just loud enough for Dorcas and Pandora to hear.

“Do you remember that time we did that impromptu body painting? You know, when we ended up spending the whole night in a very, very colorful state because we got too absorbed in coming up with new designs?”

Barty blushed furiously and quickly looked away. “Stop it, Evan.”

Pandora and Dorcas exchanged a confused glance. Body painting? Before they could ask, Barty changed the subject.

“Is this the start of a beauty routine I’m going to get addicted to?” he asked, glancing around at the others. “I mean, I feel like a living work of art. Picasso, who?”

Dorcas laughed as she handed Pandora the chosen outfits.

“We could always make it a tradition,” she said, and although it was meant as a joke, she couldn’t help but consider how wonderful it would be if they could all meet like this again and again.

Pandora seemed to agree, casting an interested glance at the clothes Dorcas had brought. “What do you think, Barty? Should we make you the star of the evening?”

Barty shrugged, still red-cheeked but with a small grin that suggested he was enjoying the attention. “Why not? If I’m going to be decorated, it should be done properly.”

Dorcas looked at them all with a smile, but inside, a nervousness lingered that she couldn’t shake. She knew she would soon need to talk to them about Marlene, but it felt as though the words were stuck in her throat. She tried to focus on what was happening in front of her, but the thought of their reactions kept sneaking into her mind.

She heard footsteps behind her, and when she turned around, Regulus was standing in the doorway, with an expressionless face, though his eyes revealed something resembling tiredness. “What have I missed?” he asked softly, but his tone was warm.

Dorcas felt a slight relief at seeing him. “Perfect timing, Reg! Barty’s just about to try on my clothes. How about I put a bit of eyeliner on you?” She tried to sound as casual as possible, but her hands shook slightly as she picked up the eyeliner pencil.

Regulus hesitated for a moment before nodding slowly. “Okay. But just a discreet line.”

Dorcas sat down on the sofa that Barty and Pandora weren’t occupying and made space for Regulus. He sauntered over to her and sat down calmly. Gently, she began applying the eyeliner while he sat still beside her. She felt his eyes follow her movements closely, as if he were trying to read her mind.

“You seem to have something on your mind,” Regulus said softly. “You know you can tell me anything.”

Her hands immediately grew more nervous, and she took a deep breath to gather her courage. “Yes… There’s something I want to tell the others.” Her voice was quiet, but she continued applying the eyeliner, as if it provided her with some sort of shield against what she was about to say.

Regulus remained calm, but she could see his curiosity shining through. “What is it?”

Dorcas finished the line and set the eyeliner pencil aside. She pulled the chair in front of him and sat down so they were at eye level. “It’s this girl I’ve met,” she began, her voice slightly trembling. “Her name is Marlene.”

There was a moment of silence where Regulus just looked at her, and she could feel his gaze as a heavy weight on her shoulders. She knew what he was thinking, and the fear of his reaction made her heart heavy.

“Marlene,” he repeated slowly, as if savoring the name. “Is she… your girlfriend?”