Chapter 21
We’re almost finished with dinner when the front door opens. Giles is the first to jump up to see who is coming in. There’s a vague smell of chicken that follows the closing door and keys being dropped onto one of the side tables.
“Buffy?” Willow asks, standing up and craning her neck around.
Dawn looks excited, for a moment, and then her face turns sullen and she leans back in her chair, arms folded.
“Oh!” Buffy’s voice answers, “Yeah. It’s me! I brought dinner—” she appears in the dining room entrance, and looks at the table that Willow stopped clearing when she heard the noise from the other room, “Oh.” Buffy’s voice is smaller, “You already ate.”
“No.” Giles starts and then relents, sitting back down, “Well, yes…obviously.”
“We didn’t know when you’d be coming back.” Dawn says, through gritted teeth.
Buffy puts the chicken down at the empty edge of the table, and sits down pushing the chicken dejectedly away.
“You know.” I tell her, “I would love some chicken.”
“Yes.” Giles agrees, “As would I.”
“I’ll take a drumstick.” Dawn says.
Buffy gets up and begins serving the chicken out to everyone, taking a breast for herself.
Dawn takes a small bite of the chicken, before toying with it nervously “So…” she says, shrinking a little under everyone turning to look at her, “Buffy…how did it go?”
“How did what go?”
“Your visit with Angel.” Dawn replies, tersely.
Buffy just nods for a moment, then chews on her lip.
“You were gone for days—” Dawn starts.
“It was intense.” Buffy says, finally. Her energy feels all scattered when she talks, but not as wonky as it has been, “There was a lot of..” she sighs, “…it was necessary though.” She nods, “I remembered—” she sighs, “I can’t right now, but Dawn—I…” she gets up and hugs her sister, “I—it was sudden, I know, but if I didn’t right then I wo—wouldn’t have had the courage to confront him.”
“Confront him?” Dawn and Willow say at the same time.
Buffy chews on her lip, standing up from Dawn and then leaning on the wall, “I guess I—” she starts and then pulls herself up, “Something happened when I was there before…and I didn’t remember it but now I do.”
“That took all this time?” Dawn demands, standing up before anyone can say anything she makes a strained screeching noise and storms off upstairs.
Buffy looks somehow both impassive and heart sick.
“Give it a moment and go to her.” Giles instructs.
“I don’t—” Buffy starts.
“She was scared.” I put in, “You did—” I hesitate because I’m not 100%sure we’re close enough I can correct her.
“I had to call Cordelia to find out you’d arrive safely.” Giles puts in to the stretching silence, “We had no idea you were alright or not. Imagine how that made her feel—”
Buffy disappears up the stairs.
Giles sits with his arms folded thinking for a moment.
Willow follows my lead when I begin clearing dishes and putting away leftovers. Giles excuses himself and goes outside.
“I still think we could do that locator spell, easy.” Willow remarks during a lull in conversation where I’ve trailed off my story about something Miryam said in class, given I realized halfway through explaining it that you had to be there for it to make sense.
“I want to turn the salt and red brick dust into protection charms.” I blurt out as a counter.
“That’s a good idea.” Willow says, “but I can’t help feel you’re changing the subject.”
I blow air out through my mouth, “It’s not that I don’t think we could do it. I’m just worried about after.”
“After?” she queries.
“What you’d be doing once you found whatever or whoever it is.”
“What?”
I know I’m not phrasing things well and I feel that crimson creeping from my toes to my head, “You’ve just been so gung-ho-caution-to-the-wind about everything lately and I was thinking about how you went after Glory and Buffy, right now, might not being up to doing anything.”
“I’m careful.” She retorts.
“I know.” I amend, “but my brain was circling on things and did you ever thank him?”
“Who?” she puts the last dish away and I drain the water out of the sink and wipe it down.
I mean, I didn’t either, in all the chaos and after but I should have thought of it before now, “Osiris.” I tell her, “For interceding for you.”
She looks confused at that, “I won her back.” She says, “You know what. I’m going to shower.”
So, no. The answer to that is no.
It’s so late after too. But still—
I look around in our room and downstairs for things which would be good to represent Osiris and the Egyptian pantheon in general. In our room there’s the balancing scales, and we have a box of feathers. I clear off one of the end tables moving the lamp to the couch temporarily and set a cloth on before balancing the feather on the scale and putting a portion of the meat from dinner which will hopefully be enough to represent a heart. It doesn’t take much, of course to balance the feather, and I make sure to turn off the ceiling fan so that it doesn’t blow away.
I don’t have a crook or anything, so I find a picture of him in one of the books we have and keep that page open resting on the book on the side of the couch, and propping it open with the incense burner. I find sandalwood and black and gold candles to set around and light the incense off one of the candles before setting the incense stick into the burner and then sitting down cross-legged in front of the makeshift altar in meditation and thanks.
I feel Giles come in, more than hear him, and he sits down beside me and takes me hand joining me in the prayer. After a while he starts humming a tune I don’t quite recognize but I’m able to pick up the melody after a few moments and hum along with him.
The tune swells something in my chest and I feel a burst of energy rolling out of me towards the altar, as it fades I open my eyes and Giles releases my hand.
“Better late than never, I suppose.” He says giving me a smile.