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Lucifer looked down at the phone in his hand, feeling disconnected. He felt like he was suddenly floating in cotton, unable to feel, hear, or see anything around him. The Detective's words were still resounding in his ears, but he didn't feel capable of processing them.
The last week was a bit of a blur, with him trying to focus on the end-of-the-year party Eve had convinced him he needed to host in Lux, despite his general disinterest of late in anything to do with parties or even sex. It seemed that the more he wanted to be alone and catch his breath, the more Eve tried to push him into parties or people. Or parties and people.
At first, when he had first felt the pain of the Detective's betrayal like a fresh wound, Eve's presence had distracted him from the endless pain and self-hatred. For a few hours at least. But after the first few days, it had started again, even if he didn't want to admit it. Maybe it had been the expression in Chloe's eyes. Perhaps it was because he had changed from the man Eve had met years ago. Even from the man Chloe had first met. And something about what he had been doing over the last few weeks had been eroding a place inside him he didn't know he had. Maybe a place he had grown up in during his time with the Detective?
In his last session, the Doctor asked him a question he hadn't answered: Why was he with Eve? Even he was self-aware enough to realise that the first and only reason that had sprung to mind wasn't what a healthy relationship should be based on.
Because she had asked him.
And more damming.
Because the Detective hadn't.
And now, an unforeseen consequence of this decision has suddenly happened. Again, the Doctor warned him about this when she asked him if he was ready to accept the consequences of his decision. At the time, he thought she was referring to maybe leading Eve on, not about the Detective.
But now, he couldn't hide from the stark reality of what his actions had caused. After Chloe's call, with the words 'torture' and the pain in her voice when she had wished him happiness. When she said she loved him.
The finality of her goodbye.
A touch on his back brought him back to the present in the worst way possible. Eve's low voice and her lips on his ear elicited the opposite reaction that she was probably going for. Instead of feeling aroused or happy at feeling her, he felt repulsed, his whole body shuddering in rejection.
He took a step back, eluding Eve's lips, and his expression must have shown something because even Eve's obliviousness was pierced somehow, her expression becoming wary.
"Luce?" she asked, her tone going sweet and cajoling. Lucifer, who hadn't paid much attention to how she addressed him, felt another shock of repulse at the tone and the nickname. Despite the distance he had put between them, she tried to forge ahead. "We are missing you inside. I think you wanted to be involved in this from the beginning. You always say you like to 'eat the whole cake', not only the leftovers" She smiled what she probably thought was a seducing smile, but again, Lucifer's whole perspective had shifted within minutes, and what would have attracted him before, now felt hollow, fake.
Eve had brought more and more people into his bed as if she thought she could hold him if he didn't have to renounce to other people. He had been worrying about her actions as she looked increasingly desperate over his growing indifference.
Lucifer hadn't cared any way or another to fight back. With Chloe's words in his mind, about how she couldn't atone any longer, and the 'torture' she mentioned, he couldn't but wonder if a part of him hadn't followed Eve's suggestions in order to punish the Detective, knowing not only that she disapproved of that lifestyle in general but also to try an elicit the jealousy she had shown in the past.
To try and elicit some answer from her. Lucifer didn't need the Doctor's expertise to know that there were better ways to go about things. It wasn't the right choice for his relationship with Chloe, not for Eve. Not even for himself.
"You should go back inside, Eve" Lucifer tried diplomacy to avoid confrontation until he felt more capable of making a decision.
However, Eve seemed to have noticed something. Maybe she was more attuned to his moods than he had believed because she uncharacteristically insisted.
"Love. You shouldn't stay here alone; come with me and show Dilon how it's done." She tried to come closer to him again. Lucifer took a step back again, avoiding her hands, trying to find a gracious way out.
"You should go and have fun, Eve. I am not in the mood right now," he insisted. He may have been able to convince her for now at least, but her gaze focused on his phone, which was still clenched in his hand, and she seemed to remember what had abruptly taken him outside from the activities they had been pursuing. Her tone turned darker now.
"It was her, was it? The 'Detective'" her way of saying the word sounded strange, like she was placing quotes in the title.
"You should go back inside, Eve," Lucifer said more firmly this time. He wouldn't argue about Chloe with Eve—not even he was that tone-deaf.
But Eve didn't seem inclined to agree with this, her look turning from seductive to mulish.
"No! She is finally gone, and you are still brooding about her!" she said, her tone going higher when she complained. Lucifer turned toward her now that he had found something he could be angry about, entirely focused.
"What did you say?" he asked, controlling his anger until he got the answer needed. Eve was the one now to take a step back, her eyes going wide and her hands going to her mouth.
"I… "she trailed off, visibly looking for words that wouldn't lead her to a deeper hole than the one she had already fallen without meaning to.
"What do you know about the Detective being gone?" He asked again, now starting to lose control of his anger.
Eve tried to back up another step, but Lucifer quickly grabbed her arm and held her in place. He controlled the strength of his grip so as not to hurt her, but she wasn't going anywhere.
"Eve," Lucifer said. He was starting to lose his patience and didn't want to begin a fight right now. No when he felt himself panicking after his conversation with the Detective.
No when his whole focus was on finding where Chloe was and going straight to her. Eve was more aware of what had been happening than Lucifer had credited her. More than Lucifer himself had been, apparently.
It seemed that Lucifer's tone had been enough to cover his sincerity because Eve caved quickly this time.
"Miss Lopez called with a message for you," Eve started, her tone again cajoling. Lucifer kept his face blank and unyielding, and Eve continued her narrative quickly. She said that the Detective had left the message with her if you went looking for her, but she was… concerned about it and thought you would want to hear it sooner."
"And she left this message with you?" Lucifer questioned incredulously. "Why didn't she call me at my cell?"
"No, she…she called to your phone", Eve admitted. "She left a message in it" Lucifer looked back inside at this. He didn't remember any messages in the penthouse phone line, but he wasn't in the habit of checking that often. Eve, however, hadn't finished with her confession. "To your cell phone. I borrowed it a few days ago," she rushed over, clearly afraid now of what must be Lucifer's expression. "I didn't want us to be interrupted, and it was the party we had with Maze two days ago. You have been so distant. I wanted you to relax," she said, now with tears in her eyes.
But Lucifer wasn't falling for it. While he had indulged her over the last few weeks, she had now overstepped into something he considered untouchable.
"That was when I misplaced my phone. I found it later on the piano, and you said I must have left it there accidentally. You lied." Lucifer became increasingly angry. "You stole it from me, must have deleted that message knowing I would want to hear it, and then lie to me," he accused, releasing her arm now as the repulse he had felt before returned to full force.
"I didn't mean to!" Eve defended, "I just want you to be happy. To forget about that work and the Detective for a while, and for us to be happy and have a nice end of the year without that woman interfering."
"That woman is important to me!" Lucifer thundered, hitting the wall at his side, unconcerned with the debris. "She is more important to me than anything else! It would be best if you hadn't interfered, Eve; you had no right and the consequences of your actions…" he ranted, turning his back to Eve and pulling out his phone, intending to call Ms Lopez now and get the message he had clearly missed before. Now, he understood Ms Lopez's mixed signals at the department this week when she had apparently thought he knew more than he did about Chloe's absence and her cryptic comments.
"More important than me?" Eve's tearful question came from behind him before he made his call. Lucifer closed his eyes momentarily. This scene now was why he hadn't wanted this discussion. He realised he was only delaying this moment. But now his fury was such that he didn't have the wish to be gentle as he would have in another moment.
"More important than anything else," he turned back to look into those dark eyes, full of tears, as he had suspected. Yes, Eve. She is the one thing I can't live without. The one who makes me happy and makes me whole. That makes me want to be the better version of myself," he admitted out loud, wanting to speak the words, "You shouldn't have interfered." He repeated, "That was a line you shouldn't have crossed."
"Even after what she did?" Eve accused faintly. "She betrayed you, and she tried to kill you. She hurt you" Eve threw all she had at him, her tone desperate.
But Lucifer had already spent months in pain, and he realised he had used this justification, along with many others in the past, to keep the Detective at bay.
And that must have hurt Chloe time and time again. That day at the beach. Candy. That dinner stood up. His mother trying to kill her. The many evasions where he hadn't shown her the truth about himself. And many other instances where he had made mistakes and hurt Chloe.
And she had forgiven him. Time after time after time.
"She did, she did something terrible. She is not perfect, and she made a mistake," Lucifer admitted calmly now, his heart finally at peace with the realisation he was reaching. "She was vulnerable. I made her vulnerable. I spent three years sending her mixed signals, and then she had the truth dropped on her in the worst way possible, and she… She reacted, and she made a grave mistake. But that is all it was, a mistake."
"A mistake that could have cost you your life", Eve pointed out bitterly.
"As many mistakes of mine could have cost her her life the many times I put her in danger" Lucifer shook his head, remembering the Doctor's words a few days before. "But it doesn't matter, Eve. I forgive her for what she did, and it's not a balance of who has been worse for the other. If it was, Chloe should have left years ago, as the balance has been very much against me until that moment." Lucifer was feeling his stomach sink now." But she didn't. She gave me a chance after a chance. She forgave me sincerely and never went back to throw into my face what I had done to her. Not even these last few weeks had she used my own mistakes to justify herself. She has tried to make amends, and despite me saying I had forgiven her… I've still been punishing her. And it wasn't fair," he concluded sadly.
Eve, however, didn't see the same thing he did. She tried to approach him again, and when Lucifer backed away, avoiding her touch, she extended her hands in a pleading gesture.
"You didn't do anything wrong," her voice tried to reach him, but he didn't allow her touch to do it. You went back to your life to be happy. She didn't have any right to you, and you didn't owe her anything more than you gave her. We were having fun!" Her rant was going higher. "I made a mistake, maybe. You can forgive her, but you can't forgive me?" she asked.
"I owe her to give her a chance," Lucifer said softly. "Because I love her", he repeated. "Your 'mistake' has hurt her even more than I have hurt her already, and that I can't forgive. That is why we are a mistake, Eve" Lucifer shook his head. "I will always put her first; no matter what happens between us, she will always be my priority."
Now that he had reached his conclusion, he knew what he would do and wanted to finish this in the best way possible. Even if he was angry with Eve's deception, he knew most blame lay at his feet. But his patience and wish to end this in the best way possible were warring with his concern about Chloe's whereabouts. Nevertheless, he tried again to make Eve see his way.
"I owed her being honest with her. It wasn't fair for me to throw you at her face when we had been as close as we had to be something else. I knew I was hurting her. I have been with many over the years," He admitted. "And she had never said anything and always tried to be there for me, even when it pains her. And I knew it pain her. I promised myself and to her that I would never hurt her on purpose. And I did it anyway. To punish her. This thing with you was all about her, Eve, and it ends now."
"No, no, no, you are with me because you want me. You love me!" Eve said, almost hysterically, "No, you can't. I have done all for you, worked with you, and made friends with your friends. I love you, and I want to be with you…"
"But I don't", Lucifer cut through with steel in his voice. "I don’t love you, and I don’t want to be with you”
Lucifer could see the effect of his words on the woman in front of him, but he was unable to be more gentle. Right now, the burning wish to find Chloe almost made him scratch his arms. He wanted, needed for this to be over with.
"You need to leave Eve." Through their conversation, Lucifer's mind had continued to clear things up—not in the way Eve wanted.
"I will call Patrick to send someone to help you pack and take you wherever you want to go." Lucifer moved away from Eve, and his purpose was now more evident than ever. He opened the doors of his balcony and entered the room behind it.
"Everyone!" he called to the people inside, which seemed to jump at attention at his Lord-of-Hell tone. "Party is over!" he ordered, making eye contact with several of the people inside. "Pick up your clothes and leave. You have five minutes. Off you pop!" Lucifer's voice broke no discussion, and he used his most commanding voice, nothing like the fun party devil that mortals were used to because no one tried to argue or complain. Almost immediately, everyone in the room picked up their clothes and raced each other to the exit, while Lucifer made a call to his security, Ms Lopez and Patrick, in that order.
Twenty minutes later, after changing his clothes, only Eve was left to deal with in the penthouse, and Lucifer turned back to her, noticing she hadn't been packing, her expression stubborn. At any other time, Lucifer would have been at a loss for how to deal with her. He would have tried coaxing and probably made some crazy scheme to make her leave him - maybe becoming the worst boyfriend in the world or something foolish like that - instead of confronting the situation straight on.
But right now, he didn't have time to lose. He was aware that he was probably weeks past the time he should have acted with the Detective. But he hadn't and had run out of time now.
So Eve needed to go, and he needed to pack. Ms Lopez wasn't confident, but she promised to track Chloe's call and get back to him as soon as possible. In the meantime, Lucifer had a few other ideas to try.
But Eve first. If all went as he hoped for, he didn't want the Detective to return and see any trace of another woman in his penthouse.
And if it didn't go as well as he hoped… Well, he didn't feel it would improve things to see the proof of what had been happening the last few weeks.
He went to one of his closets, remembering a few boxes he had kept… for plans that weren't important right now. They would become helpful now. He took out three cardboard boxes and placed them on the floor before the bed. He opened one of the two dressers he had assigned to Eve for her things - he hadn't wanted them mixed with his own - and started to place everything inside the boxes haphazardly. Eve tried to stop him, her voice high and filled with desperation.
"Luce! No, stop! I am not going anywhere. We need to talk." Eve took her clothes back and placed them in the drawer again.
The sound of the elevator arriving at the penthouse prevented Lucifer from answering.
Verbally, at least. He took the dresser in his hands. Weight wasn't a problem for him, and he took it outside to the elevator. The three men Patrick had sent at his orders, and Patrick himself, looked at him with wide eyes but moved aside quickly, allowing him to place the dresser inside the elevator.
"Keep that open," he ordered the men before returning to his bedroom and taking the other dresser. Eve looked at him, eyes wide and speechless for once.
Lucifer placed the second dresser inside the elevator before turning back to Eve. He knew that he looked out of patience by now, and he wasn't going to change his mind.
"Is there anything else you want to pack? These nice men", he motioned to the two older men, ones that Lucifer had expressly asked Patrick to be very hard to bribe, seduce or anything similar "Will escort you outside Lux and help you with your belongings. You won't be able to return. Anything you leave here will be removed if you don't take it with you now".
He motioned the other two men.
"You are to clean up everything here, including removing any belongings that are not mine," he looked at Patrick. You know what is mine and what isn't. Anything you have any doubt about, you can store it downstairs and send me a photo to check," he motioned to Eve now. You will not allow her to enter this penthouse. You will ensure that the elevator gets a lock and keep anyone but me, the Detective, and his spawn outside of this place."
Lucifer picked up a carry-out bag and turned back to Eve, who had been rendered mute after the incident with the dresser. Lucifer softened his voice now, trying again for Eve's sake. He addressed his following words both to her and Patrick.
"You have the rest of the evening to finish packing your things. After that, Jack and Luis will take you and your things wherever you indicate them. If you don't pack anything, they will pack anything not mine, leave it in a locker, and give you the key for it, but you won't be allowed back here."
When Eve didn't seem to have any answer or wish to respond to his words, he turned his focus on Patrick.
"After escorting her out, you will clean up any other belongings that aren't mine and send a cleaning service here to clean everything." Patrick nodded in response, his face serious. "You will then ask for the lock to be installed and keep anyone else out of here."
After Patrick nodded again, Lucifer picked up his bag and went to the stairs. The elevator was still stuck with the dressers inside.
Seeing Lucifer walking away seemed to unfreeze Eve, and she tried to grab his arm again. Lucifer stepped aside, avoiding her touch, but he turned his face in her direction. Eve opened her mouth, another plea clearly prepared for him, but Lucifer raised his hand, blocking her words.
"This is for the best, Eve; you will find someone who can give you what you want. I am certain you will soon see that I am not what you seek."
"But you are", Eve pleaded again, tears freely falling down her face. Lucifer shook his head in defeat.
"I am sorry."
And he walked away.