Today they were going to be brewing Amortentia. James wasn't worried about it. He could probably recite what he was going to smell right now before the potion was brewed. However despite this James still felt nauseous during the lesson. It’s no big deal it will smell like Lily.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
It did not smell like Lily.
The second the smell of sea salt hit him he stumbled backwards. His friends whipped their heads around to see why he had slipped. Sirius spoke up,
“Prongs you good over there?”
“Yeah, I'm good, it was just much stronger than I expected.”
“No shock there, you've been in love with Lily since the first year.”
James let out a laugh. Of course, truthfully he was laughing because he didn't dare place any thought into what it smelt like.
“Potter, would you mind sharing what you smelt?” Slughorn asked.
“It was the smell of lilies and parchment,” Sirius said in a mocking tone.
He then held out a hand for James to high five which he happily did. He allowed himself to get carried away in Sirius’ joy.
“Alright alright, your turn Pads. Who is the love of your life?”
Sirius leaned over with a smile on his face. After a few seconds it quickly warped into confusion.
“Pads what do you smell?” Peter questioned with a slight glint in his eye.
“I'm not sure it just kinda smells like the dorm which is strange.”
Out of the corner of his eye, James saw Remus blush and quickly turn away.
Despite what his friends might say about his lack of observation skills he was pretty sure that Sirius liked Remus. He knew Remus liked Sirius because he had directly told him so but he was confident he would have figured it out anyway.
Sirius seemed totally oblivious to his feelings or was actively ignoring them. Despite his hope of Sirius figuring it out himself it had been long enough.
“Of course it smells like the dorms, You’re my soulmate, how could it not?”
He then dramatically draped himself across Sirius's shoulder and looked up at him.
“You're so right Prongs. What was I thinking? It’s obviously you, it could only ever be you!”
Someone wolf whistled from the back and so they grabbed each other's hands and started doing stage bows and sending kisses to their now audience. The rest of the class began to clap and whistle more. They likely would have done this for the rest of class had slughorn not interrupted.
“Settle down!”
James and Sirius exchanged a quick glance and a smirk then returned to their potion and Sirius began to talk with peter.
“So wormy, what do you smell?”
“Something vaguely floral but also the smell of campfires.”
“Oooooh who could this mysterious floral and firey lover be?”
His thoughts were slowly drifting back to the smell of his amortentia. He couldn't think of anyone that it could be. Obviously it wasn't Lily, he had ruled that one out but it still didn't leave much of a clue for who it actually was. He leaned over slightly to see if he could smell anything else that might help him figure out who it might be. There was that smell of sea salt but it also smells like pine. He kept trying to come up with anyone who might smell like that but he was coming up blank. Abruptly Sirius’ hand was waving frantically in front of his face.
“Jamesss, come back from Wonderland and help me.”
“What’s the issue?”
“Remus won't tell us what he smells.”
“Oh is that so?”
“He's being all secretive about it for some reason.” Peter chimed in.
“Moony come on you gotta tell us please please please please please please please please please please please please please please”
“Ok ok, Sirius that's enough” Remus finally said with a slight blush in his cheeks.
“So you're finally gonna tell us now?”
“no.”
“Oh come on!”
Sirius proceeded to cross his arms and huff like a child throwing a temper tantrum. Though he couldn’t for long because before he could start pestering moony again class was dismissed so they all quickly packed their things and left. James was quiet the whole time, still trying to come up with who it could be.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
It had been three days since his world had gotten tipped upside down.
Today was a game day and so he climbed out of bed and began to gather his quidditch supplies while making sure he stayed quiet so his friends could keep sleeping.
He made his way onto the pitch to get some alone time to warm up before the game started. Usually this would help him clear his mind so he could have a good game but nothing was shaking the smell of sea salt and pine burned into his brain.
Eventually he gave up because he needed to save his energy for the game. There wasn't enough time to go to the dorms or anything so he just laid down in the grass to watch the clouds go by.
He started slowly going through every person he knew but none of them seemed to match up with pine and sea salt.
Soon everyone began to arrive so he got up and walked over to the locker room to go over the game with his team. Everyone was excited for this game because it was against Slytherin which always garnered fierce support from each side.
James pulled everyone into a quick huddle before the match started.
“Alright, we’ve got this, this is what we've been training for. All hands in. On three. One. Two. Three. GRYFFINDOR”
They all tossed their hands up and began to run to the middle of the pitch. James walked up to shake hands with the Slytherins coach and madam hooch blew her whistle.
Everyone shot up into the sky and began playing. This year the team was doing really well. They had all gotten their formations down and had been working tirelessly. James was really proud of all of them and felt a surge of joy as he took a moment to look around at the team.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gryffindor was ahead by a lot. It would only take one more goal for them to win regardless of who caught the snitch. Slythrine was well aware of this and was becoming more and more aggressive.
James flew around the beaters and was open for the pass that would win them the game. However right as he was almost ready to catch the quaffle Regulus dove straight down right next to him
He got so close that he could feel his robes brush against him and he could smell him.
pine
pine and sea salt
James nearly fell off his broom. He missed the pass and before he could process what happened he was left staring at the spot where Regulus once was.
He had come to a full stop now.
Vaguely he registered the sounds of cheers and boos coming from the stands. But that didn't matter.
He realized that everyone else was descending so he began to as well at a much slower pace.
When he reached the ground he was immediately met with a hand on his shoulder that forcefully spun him around.
“James, Hey James what's wrong?”
He looked up at Sirius and saw that Peter and Remus were with him as well. Try as he may, he was at a total loss for words. He just stood there and looked at Sirius. His thoughts were entirely preoccupied with what had just happened.
When he didn't respond he was quickly enveloped into a hug. There were three sets of arms around him but he couldn't bring himself to lift his arms to hug them back. Slowly as everything began to sink in he came back to the current situation.
“i’m so sorry guys i don't know what happened i-”
“Hey James it's ok, things happen but it will be ok.” Peter said and squeezed James a little tighter
Remus moved to the left slightly and spoke.
“He’s right everythings ok.”
“Yeah and if you need anything all of us are here for you ok?”
James just nodded and gave them each their own hug then looked in the direction of the locker room. Sirius once again placed his hand on James’ shoulder.
“They know you and they know things happen, it's a part of life, you’ve got this.”
James turned to his friends once more and looked at them all before giving them another nod and beginning to walk towards the lockers where he knew the rest of the team was.
“Guys I'm so sorry I really don't know what happened. I am so sorry I cost us the game we were doing amazing and I messed it all up. I'm so sorry.”
Marlene looks over from the far side of the room.
“Hey man it's good shit happens sometimes. We played good and that's all that matters.”
A ripple of agreement went through the crowd and everyone began resuming whatever they had previously been doing.
James sighed letting some of the weight off his shoulders. He still felt horrible about losing the game for everyone but at least they played well like Marlene said.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was well past midnight and James couldn't sleep. He had been staring at the ceiling for hours trying whatever he could but no matter what he just couldn't get to sleep.
He sat up and threw his robes on and made his way out of the dorm silently. He didn't know where he was headed just that he needed to go somewhere.
He began to wander the halls until he stopped in front of one the large windows. He would go to the astronomy tower but chances were that he would only walk in on something he didn't need to see.
Instead he settled for sitting on the ledge of the window and gazing across the Hogwarts grounds. The moon shone on the surface of the water leaving a perfect silver reflection. Despite the tranquility of the night he still couldn't get the way Regulus smelled out of his mind.
He leaned his head on the window and closed his eyes. Despite all this, Regulus was a guy. James wasn't homophobic but for most of his life he thought that Lily was the one he was going to marry. Lily was supposed to be the one for him. They would have their white picket fence life that was boiled in joy and laughter. Lily, a girl who was supposed to be his wife.
He knew his feelings towards Lily had changed some time last year. He had assumed that he was just getting older and that was just a part of it. But apparently it wasn't. He thinks it might have been around exam season when Lily had finally reached her breaking point and asked him for help.
Everyone oohed at them in the library together and James expected to feel the love he had for Lily. But looking back he didn't.
He just felt happy that he was talking to Lily but it wasn't love.
He began to think that maybe he never truly loved lily. He had been deeply infatuated with her, that's for sure. Everyone was convinced they would end up together so he took that and ran with it.
Footsteps sounded in the corridor and he opened his eyes and quickly turned his head to see who it was. Remus was walking towards him with a curious look on his face. Eventually he made it over and sat down facing James and he pulled out a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and handed one to James who gladly took it.
“Sickle for your thoughts?”
James took a deep breath and contemplated for a moment. He trusted Remus with his life and he was pretty sure he was the best one to tell about the situation but it felt like if he spoke it would become real.
Another moment passed.
“I don't know if I was ever in love with Lily”
Remus made a humming noise but didn't speak more allowing James to think and give him time. That caused everything to come pouring out. All his thoughts about how he wasn't sure when he stopped loving Lily or if he ever loved her in the first place and how he felt like that's what he needed to do. Without that his life felt like everything he thought about his future was ripped from under his feet.
At the end of it all Remus just moved closer and set his hand on James’
“James, that's totally ok for you to feel like that. I’m sorry I pushed you to be this person that you werent.”
James let out a massive sigh of relief. He knew he wasn't going to get ridiculed but it still felt nice to have confirmation that that one sliver of a chance wasn't true. Remus spoke again.
“What brought this on?”
James sucked in a large breath and debated for a moment on what to do. He figured that he'd already said this much why not top it off.
“My amortentia didn't smell like Lily…”
“Ok that makes sense.”
“It smelt like pine and seasalt. And I had been trying to figure out who smelled like sea salt and pine. Before the match I tried flying around to try and forget about it for a little bit but that didn't work. I finally was able to forget about it once the game started but then at the end of the game when Regulus dove down and brushed past me I caught a bit of what he smelt like and I.. my amortentia smelled like Regulus.''
Remus’ eyes widen and his back straightens a little bit. A slight thud came from the corner of the corridor and they both turned their heads to see what the noise was. When they saw mrs. Norris walked calmly from one room across the corridor and they continued the conversation.
“That explains why you were so off after the game.”
---------------------
Regulus turned and started running the other way he briefly knocked into the wall on his exit but he didnt care.
He was running faster than he ever had before his mind was reeling from what he heard. Potter, James Potter, the boy Regulus had been replaced with, the boy who took his brother away from him, the boy who was the total opposite of everything Regulus had grown up with, the boy that Regulus loathed, the boy who had Regulus’ heart from the moment they first met, Had just said his amortentia smelt like Regulus.
He burst through the dorm room door out of breath. He was disheveled looking and was met with the concerned faces of four of his friends.
Barty had propped himself up on his elbows and looked the most confused. Evan was startled and looked slightly upset the intrusion had displaced him from his comfortable place on Barty’s chest. Pandora was adding charms to dorcas’ braids and her hands were still working despite her head being totally turned towards regulus. Dorcas was staring at him intensely.
“Reg, what happened, are you ok?”
He tried to steady his breaths as his eyes quickly glanced at each of his friends who were all growing more concerned.
“Potter, he said his amortentia smelt like me.”
Everyone flew up from their spots on the floor and let out varied shrieks.
“Potter as in James potter, The one you’ve had a crush on since first year?” Barty said
Evan smacked him on the shoulder.
“Did another potter randomly join the school that no one knows about? No, of course it's James Potter.”
“I just had to make sure I was hearing correctly that world's straightest man alive literally in love with Evans said his amortentia smelled like you.”
Regulus just nodded and stood up straighter. He looked over to Pandora and saw her stick out a hand to the rest of them, they all sighed and handed over various amounts of galleons.
“Pans what the fuck is that for?!?”
“I made a bet that James didn't actually like Lily.”
“How in the world could you have known that?”
“I have my ways.”
He sighed knowing any further attempts to figure out what was going on were futile.
“Ok but guys what do I do?”
“Go ask him out obviously.”
“Dorcas in what world is that helpful advice.”
“You're right, why was I expecting a logical response to this?”
“Remember when you-”
He was silenced by dorcas rushing over and clamping her hand over his mouth.
“Nope not at all actually.”
She glared at him. He tried to lick her hand to get her to move her hand but she wasn't budging. Finally he rolled his eyes and she dropped her hand.
“Alright then come on we're gonna be up for a while let's figure out what to do.”
---------------------
For the next day James tried to go about his routine as normal. That was until Sunday night when everyone was sitting in the common room. James had his head in Sirius’ lap and was throwing a small ball he had transfigured in between his hands. Sirius suddenly looked down.
“I still don’t know why my amortentia smelled like the dorm.”
His eyes were far off and he had a crinkle in between his eyebrows
James sighed slightly but knew this wasn't the time he needed a push.
“I don't know either pads, but i know you’ll get to the bottom of it.”
“Easy for you to say you knew what yours was gonna smell like and who it was linked to before you even walked in the room.”
James sucked in a small breath and felt sick. Lily and Mary walked down and plopped themselves on the opposite end of the sofa from James and Sirius.
“Pads, I know it is an awful feeling but it won't last forever.”
Sirius’ look hardened.
“Yeah sure says mr. Amortientia smells like the girl I've had a crush on since first year.” His voice had gotten louder and harsher. James knew the anger wasn't directed at him. But when Sirius said that James saw Lily still from the corner of his eye.
James sat up and looked directly at Lily. He tilted his head towards the exit and Lily surprisingly nodded at him. James then turned around to look at Sirius.
“Just because you're angry does not mean you can take it out on me. I’m not mad at you, I'll be back in a sec.”
At that Sirius seemed to snap out of his daze and he grew sad.
“Ok.”
James gave Sirius one last look to make sure he knew this wasn't because of him then stood up and walked to the exit. When Lily stood up and followed him he heard some ooh and whistles from the others in the common room but he paid them no mind and just continued to the corridor.
Lily exited the portrait moments after him and looked at him with an expecting gaze. James took one final deep breath.
“I just want to say that I'm so sorry about how I've treated you these past years. It was a dick move of me to constantly bother you especially after I knew you had already reached your limit. I know that an apology isn't going to cut it but I wanted to start there.”
Lily paused for a moment and looked almost bewildered.
“I gotta say an apology was the last thing i thought you were gonna talk about. I feel bad but James, Sirius just said your Amortentia smelled like me. I accept your apology but I just, I don't like you in that way.”
James turned his head away and sucked in a breath.
“So about that… my Amortentia doesn't actually smell like you.”
“So that means that you lied… to Sirius. Who are you and what have you done with the real James?”
James laughed at that.
“It's more complicated than that. Thank you for actually having this conversation with me.”
“I’m glad I did.”
Lily stuck out her hand.
“Friends?”
James took her hand.
“Friends.”
They shook hands and made their way back into the common room to a mild barrage of whistles, hoots and hollers. James gave Lily a sympathetic look and she just smiled and shook her head. When he found Remus in the crowd he looked guilty, he knew it was because he knew about the whole situation and James couldn’t blame the rest of them for not knowing.
---------------------
Regulus hadn’t been able to sleep all night. So when the clock hit 4 am he knew all hope of getting any restful sleep was thrown out the window. He felt like he would go insane if he spent any longer just staring at the ceiling so he got up and got dressed to go to the pitch.
As he walked to the pitch he made sure to not get caught by any other lurking students or Mrs. Norris. Even though if Mrs. Norris found him she would simply rub against his leg and then go off to do whatever it was she did.
Once he made it to the pitch he flew a few laps to get warmed up and then started practicing dives. He loved the thrill of the drop and knowing he could get so close to the ground and then pull right back up. His dives slowly became more intense the more time he spent in the air.
He shot up into the sky and did a half lap around the pitch before diving straight down. He released his hands and stuck them out to his sides and closed his eyes feeling the way the air moved around him. Right as he opened his eyes and began to pull up he heard a scream.
“REG!”
His broom immediately felt like it was anchored down and he went soaring off the front of it. It was like being thrown around in a harsh ocean current and slamming onto the sand. His arm had landed under him and felt like it ripped when his momentum made him roll. His heart was hammering in his chest and he came to a full stop.
“Reg, oh Merlin. Are you ok?”
The voice came running up beside him, he opened his eyes and slightly lifted his head to see who it was and saw James kneeling next to him.
“Theres no fucking way.”
“What? Reg are you ok?”
Someone somewhere had to have it out for him. He dropped his head back to the ground and winced slightly.
Despite his friends’ assurances he still felt like James didn't actually mean what he said and he was not at all ready to talk to him.
He felt the adrenaline dying down slightly and was made aware of pain in his arm and the headache that was brewing.
“Why are you here?”
“That does not answer my - Oh Shit your bleeding!”
He looked down and sure enough there was blood cascading from his arm. He saw a slight glimmer of white in the blood and sighed. He felt James moving around next to him. He then saw James wrap fabric around his wound.
“What-”
The words died in his throat as his eyes moved to James and saw him shirtless with the sun illuminating him from the back positioned perfectly so that the sun looked like it was his halo. It fit him perfectly. His eyes traveled over his annoyingly perfect shoulders and chest.
James turned to look at him with a look of pure concern and guilt. Oh god Regulus never wanted to leave this moment. At that thought he could feel his cheeks heat up but he couldn't bring himself to look away. James' eyes softened slightly.
“Come on, let's get you to Pomfrey.”
Regulus' eyes widened.
“No, not Pomfrey.”
“Regulus, you're severely injured, we have to go to Pomfrey.”
He thought for a moment. There's no way he was going to go to Pomfrey. There was only one other person he knew could help.
“Just take me to Sirius.”
“But”
“Potter, just take me to Sirius if you have to.”
“Fine.”
James moved to help him stand up and Regulus saddened that James was no longer kneeling next to him. When he began to stand up he winced. James tried to grab his uninjured arm to help him walk.
“I don’t need to be carried, it's not like my leg is bleeding out.” He tried to take a step to get infront of James and prove his point but as he stood on his foot pain jolted through his leg and he stumbled. James immediately caught him. Regulus’ felt his cheeks grow hotter and turned to glare at James but no longer protested when he threw his arm over his shoulder and grabbed his waist.
It took a few steps but then they were in sync enough that they weren't halfway tripping. Regulus’ Adrenaline high was finally gone and his arm was screaming at him. But that meant he finally processed how he had ended up in this situation in the first place.
“Why did you throw me off my broom?” There was slight anger in his voice.
“You were literally plummeting towards the ground. I was trying to save you.”
“I was entirely fine before you tried to help.”
“You were inches away from the ground and you didn't even have your hands on the broom.”
“Like I said, I was fine.”
He did think about it though. He hadn’t felt like he was inches off the ground. He looked over his shoulder and saw that his broom was frozen mere inches off the ground and felt panic rise through him at the thought of what could have happened. James was the one to break the silence this time.
“I have a weird question.”
“Really.”
“Its kinda weird and maybe a little bit personal, you don't have to answer if you don't want to.”
“Just ask the question.”
“Are you into guys?”
His step faltered slightly and james’ grip on his waist tightened. He looked eager but there was something else in his gaze that threw regulus off.
“That is more than a little bit personal.”
He saw James’ face fall.
“That's ok like I said you don't have to answer if you don't want to.” He spoke quickly.
“I do.”
“I- what.”
“I do like guys.”
James’ face refilled with hope and he turned away with a smile on his face.
“Ok.”
“Really ok is the only response I get.”
“I don't know what else to say.”
Regulus thought for a moment.
“Let me ask you a question now.”
“Ok, what’s your question?”
He was trying to think of the best way to phrase his question without making it seem like he knew something already. They walked in silence for a while and the entrance to Gryffindor was quickly approaching.
Throughout the walk he was getting more and more nauseous. When they reached the entrance Regulus felt a wave of dizziness hit him. He paled and James took one look at him before picking him up and carrying him up the entrance. Regulus would have argued against it but he knew that there would only be issues the longer he waited.
He quickly made it to their dorm through the empty common room and James set him down while still supporting his weight. He tried the handle and when he found it was locked he knocked quickly.
“Sirius!” His voice was laced with fear.
“One second.”
Regulus turned to look at James and in his confused state asked him a question.
“I heard you made Amortentia the other day. What did yours smell like?”
James froze and his eyes darted between Regulus. He opened his mouth but no sound came out. He saw James swallow hard and try to say something again. At that moment the door flung open and Sirius stood in front of them. His face quickly fell.
“Reggie what happened.” he said frantically as he began herding them into the middle of the room.
“I was thrown off my broom.”
James stayed totally silent. Sirius began unwrapping james’ blood soaked shirt from his arm.
“Why aren't you at Pomfrey's right now?”
Regulus simply looked at him.
“Right, ok.” He finished unwrapping his arm and sucked in a breath. “Shit Reg I don't know if I can fix this.”
Regulus shuddered. “Just try. If anyone can do it, it's you.”
“I can fix the physical damage I think but, I can't do anything about the blood loss and it’s only getting worse.”
There was rustling from behind sirius. He saw Remus searching through the drawers until he pulled out a red bottle. He walked over and uncorked it.
“Blood Replenisher.”
“Moony howd you get that?” Sirius said in near astonishment
“Pomfrey gave me some extra incase anything were to happen.”
Remus handed the bottle to James and he snapped out of his trance he had been in. Sirius Began working as quickly as he could. Regulus let out cries of pain and saw Sirius’ frown grow deeper with each one. And with each one James’ grip on him got tighter and tighter.
Regulus couldn't tell if he was starting to pass out due to the blood loss or the pain. He was fighting to stay awake but he could feel himself losing. He felt something wrap around his arm and felt that had caused his arm to gain warmth. He felt the cold glass press against his lips and vaguely heard James’ voice but he couldn't make out what he was saying.
The potion slid down his throat and the bottle was removed. He felt his head fall back and then everything went black.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Regulus noticed a shaking sensation next to him. He was then immediately hit with waves of pain. He let out a groan and felt a large movement next to him while the shaking stopped.
“Reg, are you awake?”
He responded with a mumble. Something hard fell on his chest and he felt arms wrap around him. He slowly opened his eyes and waited for them to adjust and for the faint dizziness to go away. Cautiously he moved his eyes down. He was met with a mop of dark brown hair sprawled out on his chest. The mop of hair turned his head to face him.
His eyes were red and puffy. The darker color near his pupil branched out at the top which made it look like his pupil had antlers.
That made Regulus smile to himself.
“I'm so glad you're ok, I was so scared.”
He didn't have a response to that. Sirius’ footsteps sounded outside the door and James removed himself from Regulus’ chest.
Sirius bounded in and rushed to his side with remus not far behind.
“Your ok.” He was then met with arms wrapped around him again. He brought his un injured arm around his brother and burried his head in the crook of his neck. He took a deep breath and relaxed. He felt something damp on his shoulder. Sirius pulled back slightly and looked at him with tear rimmed eyes.
“I'm ok.” Sirius gave him a small smile and he returned it.
“How long has it been?”
“Not all that long, only a few minutes.” Remus said he was looking back and forth to him and james.
Regulus let out a sigh of relief. Nothing too severe then he should be ok.
“Regulus do you need anything? Breakfast is about to start so we could grab you some food.” James said
He thought about it for a moment.
“That's fine.”
James began to move but was interrupted.
“Prongs it's ok Sirius and I can go down to get food for the both of you.”
Regulus felt the need to run away as far as he could but he doubted that he would be able to make it anywhere. He looked down and saw that Potters’ jersy was laying on the nightstand next to him. Fuck.
Not only was he practically stuck in this bed but this bed belonged to James Potter. He was fully convinced that this had to be the worlds worst joke on him. He briefly considered calling out for Sirius to stay but he had already stood up and was almost out the door.
He watched Remus and Sirius leave and close the door further solidifying his torment and he suppressed a groan.
He sat in total silence with James for far too long. He didn’t dare look at him but he could feel James staring at him.
Eventually it was taking too long and he felt like he was going to explode. He turned his head and looked directly back at James.
“You never answered my question.”
James sucked in a breath and stared at him more. Seemingly totally speechless. He once again opened his mouth but nothing came out.
They sat in this silence for much longer than the first. He felt like he could see James’ brain working.
Finally James closed his eyes and took in a deep breath
“You my amortentia smelled like you.”
Regulus stopped breathing. James opened his eyes and began searching Regulus’ face for his reaction. But Regulus was left gaping. He had overheard him but he had convinced himself that it wasn't true somehow.
James looked at him with such intensity he thought he might shrivel away soon.
His heart was racing, despite everything it still felt like it wasn't real.
But it was real and he had to do something about it. For all he knew James would never speak to him after this.
“Mine would have smelled like you.”
James let out a breath and relaxed but tensed up again. He looked like he was processing everything
“But you haven't made it yet so you don't actually know.”
Regulus breathed out in what was almost a laugh.
“I know how I feel.”
“I thought I knew how I felt but I didn't, so I don't know how much I can trust that.”
“If I had any around me I would tell you exactly what I smell.”
James paused and stood up from the bed. Regulus cursed at himself, this was his only chance and he fucked it up.
James began walking to the nightstand and opens drawer. He dug around for a moment and pulled out a hidden vial. Regulus looked at for a moment and his eyes grew wide.
“You just have Amortentia on you?”
“I wanted to make sure I was smelling what I smelled.”
James uncapped it and stared at for a moment before extending it to regulus.
He knew he could tell James exactly what it smelled like here and now and he was so close. Instead of just smelling it he quickly grabbed the vial and downed the whole thing.
James gapped at him in shock and stood there frozen. Staring at him. Regulus looked right back.
---------------------
James was entirely stunned. He couldn't do anything else but stare. He waited for the potion to take effect and he was trying to come up with what to do when Regulus suddenly started acting weird.
He watched and stared. Regulus' eyes were filled with determination. For a moment they became cloudy, but as soon as it came it was gone and the clouds disappeared and revealed the sky after a rain. and
Oh
Oh
Regulus was in love with him. He was in love with someone who loved him back.
A surge of happiness washed over him finally breaking through the uncertainty and he began to smile.
he let out a faint
“Oh”
and a small laugh.
He saw regulus’ eyes soften slightly.
Regulus' non-injured arm grabbed him and pulled him in close. James leaned forward and their lips met for a brief moment.
It was very soft and hesitant yet it still felt like the world had stopped spinning.
However he was abruptly shoved away and before he was able to open his mouth to apologize the door burst open. Sirius and Remus walked in each with two plated of food in their hands.
James looked over at Regulus and as he gave a subtle nod he relaxed instantly.
Sirius began speaking
“Ok so Regulus I don’t know what you like anymore but I hope that you still like some of the things from when you were a kid so I got you some of those but I didn’t know if you might hate all that food now or just jot like it so I got a some of the other stuff as well. I tried to get some of everything but Moony stopped me. It’s ok if you don't like any of it though. And-”
Regulus cut him off.
“Sirius, Thank you.”
Sirius let out a sigh of relief and wordlessly handed a plate to James. Sirius looked around for another moment before a small frown formed. Remus rolled his eyes and poked Sirius in the back with a plate.
Sirius spun around to see what it was. Remus nudged the plate forward and Sirius took it with a look of astonishment.
“Thank you,” he said quietly.
Remus just smiled at him.
They all moved around until everyone found a spot to enjoy their food. Remus sat on the bed next to Regulus and Sirius sat by his feet. James ended up transfiguring a small stool for himself and set it on the side of the bed near regulus.
Everyone stayed mostly quiet while eating. The shock and fear were wearing off and the hunger was taking its place. There were a few mumbles of thanks throughout the group.
“Where's Pete?” James eventually asked after he finished his food.
“The girls are teaching him how to braid their hair.” Remus said
Sirius mumbled what seemed to be a vague statement of agreement through his mouthful of food.
Regulus was entirely silent during this time. But James couldn't stop staring at him. He was currently very grateful there wasn't any ongoing conversations because he wasn’t paying attention to anything else but Regulus.
His eyes were pointed down at his food for the most part but occasionally they would flick to Sirius or very rarely James which would cause a slight blush on his cheeks. He looked slightly annoyed because he was only able to use one of his arms. His hair was just slightly covering his face and ever so often he would shake his head to move it out of the way.
He finally snapped out of it and looked over at Remus when he coughed. He was met with a look he couldn't quite place on Remus’ face and he was looking in between him and Regulus with an accusatory eye.
Sheepishly James looked away from Remus and a slight smile crept onto his face.
He glanced at Regulus once more and found he also had a smile on his face.