Remus didn't know what to do. Him and Sirius were fighting all the time this time though they both said somethings they shouldn't have but it looked like thay ment them, ment to hurt eachother.
So, he left their sheared flat and went to James's he didn't even pack anything with him.
" Um,Hello, could you let me in?" he said when he opened the door, James bless him didn't comment on his appears that was probably not great and just let him in.
They were looking at each other for a bit until James asked "so, do you want hot chocolate?"it got a laugh out of him "sure mate" he answered
They were sitting in the kitchen in silence James brought two cups of chocolate and left them on the counter "so,this is the part where i ask you what happened" he asked finally.
Remus thought what the best way to answer that was and after just a bit he said "i had a fight with Sirius."
"Oh, that's all, well don't worry you'll figure things out you always do" was all James sayied not looking worried at all
"That's the thing i don't think we will, not this time i- i think that's it" He was upset how could James be so sure they would figure things out when he wasn't even sure himself.
James looked at Remus " cose you love him, and i mean it's hard sometimes but you shouldn't give up on him. Fight to for him Remus don't" he starred for a bit took a deep breath and said " don't make the same mistake i made" he looked almost sad.
That got the taller man angry though " what do you even know about love James,Huh? The only person you ever liked was lily and that lasted what a week two after that she figured out she was a lesbian, and i know for a fuct you didn't love her.Don't act like you know what being in love is like". He was shouting know but he really didn't get it what was James talking about?
The other man looked like he was considering something and then took a deep breath and said "We never dated i mean not officially but i I loved him".
That startled Remus a bit because whatever he was expecting was not this well there goes the one straight guy in the friend group he thought. He was curious now though "what happened?" And then right after " why didn't you ever tell as about him?"
James looked pained " remember on our fifth and sixth year in school i used to disappear at night for hours?"
Remus nodded and then it clicked "you were meeting him weren't you?"
"Yeah" the other man answered simply "i was meeting him."
______________________________________________Hogwarts 1977
Regulus was avoiding him they hadn't met at there room for a few weeks every time James tried to corner him and ask him whas happening between them he slips away.
Now James is sitting at the great hall not even paying the slightest attention to the conversation his friends were having; normally he would feel bad right know he couldn't bring himself to care, not when Regulus wasn't even sparing him a glance.
After dinner he makes some half assed excuse to his friends and follows the younger boy down the corridor. He calls out to him he thinks he doesn't answer finally and without much though James shoves him in a unused classroom with such force that surprises them both.
"James what the hell" the Slytherin boy whisper shouts James is pinging him over a wall and not letting go ignoring Regulus's protesters.
"What is going on Reg talk to me please you have been ignoring me it's driving me mad" He was making his best attempt to keep his voice at a reasonable level he didn't do a very good job at it.
"We're over."and then after a bit "can i go now?"It was cold uncurectericticly so even though most people think Regulus is cold and unapproachable James new better he new that boy the one that was trying so hard to brake his heart.
The older boy's hold faltered and that was when the other boy tried to make his escape he stoped him."wait please tell me what did i do i will fix it make it better whatever i did just tell me." His voice was braking now and there where tears forming in his eyes but he stoped holding Regulus in general.
He spoke again voice week a last attempt to make Regulus stay to see reason"please, i love you."
That broke Regulus's act and his eyes betrayed the sadness that he felt and was so desperately trying to hide. "James listen to me" hi tilted James face upwards to look at hin usually he was taller then Regulus but now he looked small.
The younger one took a deep breath and spoke "i will always love you Jamie, always but we weren't going to last you know this" after that he left the room.
James couldn't breathe he was left not able to breath confused and sobbing on the floor.
A week later he opened the school news paper read in bold REGULUS BLACK ENGAGED AT 16 he heard Sirius say " of fucking cores they'll hav him married as soon as he leaves school secure there perfect heir."
James that night cried because he thought he lost the love of his life thinking that things couldn't possibly get worse.
______________________________________________
1979
Regulus Black presumed dead.
James screamed and screamed until he physically couldn't any more he was gone he lost him for real this time they killed him he didn't even make it to his 18th birthday.
______________________________________________
Remus hered the story of the boy that James loves not loved because it's apparent that he still loves him how they me how they how the last time they spoke they fought.
" You still care about him why don't you talk to him" it was a total reasonable question to ask in Remus's opinion.
"His dead"James answer and Remus felt terrible for asking and for not realising of course he was with the way James talked about him like he was the light to his darkness that had ran out.
"What was his name" he asked because what was there to ask about this man that has James still upset to this day.
James was silent "you should talk to Sirius" he said and after everything Remus hered he didn't argue he got up and headed for the door, he heard the tiniest whisper of "Regulus" form James before he left.
He talked to Sirius James was right they figured things out after they did they went out with the whole group.
James was acting like he would any other day. Only when he excused himself to have a smoke and Remus followed being careful not to be seen did he see him look up at on particular star one he new he'd seen Sirius staring at the same one.
James loved Regulus in silence and now he grieves him in silence to Remus knows that anything he could do would not make things any better so he just leaves.