Chapter 1
Regulus scoffs at his phone as he reads Pandora’s message for the third time. She is always doing this. He loves her, really, but at this moment, he could wring her neck for abandoning him.
He’s been standing outside the theater they were meant to meet at 10 minutes ago, only to get a message that she’s stuck in the studio scrambling to restart her first art project of the year. The show starts in 20 minutes, and she’s only just now getting back to him after he’s spammed messages wondering where she is.
He sighs, slips his phone into his pocket, and steps into line. He might as well make the most of it. Coming to Drunk Shakespeare was his idea anyway. He found it one day scrolling through his Instagram while taking a break during one of his late-night study sessions.
It was a unique take on the Bard’s works: a group of actors, one visibly drunk, would perform one of Shakespeare’s plays with an unpredictability that, from the reviews, left the audience laughing and somewhat confused.
As the line starts to move, he hears a slightly raised voice behind him, “What do you mean you’re not fucking coming?”
There was a pause then, “No, we’ve had this planned for almost two weeks. What do you mean you’re not going to show up?”
Regulus couldn’t pass up an opportunity to be nosey, and hearing this one-sided conversation was already entertaining enough.
“Oh, you’ve been thinking of ending it all this time and you wait until AFTER I buy us these tickets that YOU wanted.” Regulus winces. Damn. This poor guy was getting ditched and dumped, and over the phone no less.
“Whatever,” the guy gritts out, obviously over the conversation and ending the call. He then stomps up behind Regulus in line.
“Fucking unbelievable,” he mumbles to himself and Regulus truly does empathize.
“Don’t worry, I also got ditched tonight. We can wallow about our solo night together,” Regulus says, turning towards the guy with a smile.
And oh, isn’t he gorgeous. Tan skin, messy curly brown hair, and round glasses, all of which really do it for Regulus.
The guy gives Regulus a small smile back, “What a pair of suckers we make, huh?”
Regulus chuckles softly, “Maybe we are, but hey at least we’re together. Misery loves company as they say.”
As they make their way into the theater, they are ushered past a velvet curtain and immediately assaulted with a tray of two shots.
“Welcome to Drunk Shakespeare! A shot to start your night of fun and shenanigans off with a bang,” the usher says with a dramatic flare presenting the tray.
Regulus and the guy look at each other, shrug, clink their glasses, and take the shot.
Both men find their seats and chuckle at the antics of the usher as the next group enters the room.
“Well, that was interesting,” the guy says, shaking his head as he scans the code to look at the drinks menu.
The guy lets out a whistle as he scans the menu, “These prices are a little ridiculous. What are we getting top shelf?”
“Oh, come on. You’re saying you don’t have the money to spend?” Regulus replies, quirking his eyebrow. He knew this type. A political science major with dreams of making it into the Senate at a young age, most likely to follow in his parent’s footsteps.
“Aw, c’mon dude what’s that supposed to mean?” the guy counters, also quirking an eyebrow right back at Regulus.
Regulus rolls his eyes and looks pointedly at the Hermes loafers and the tiny Cartier bracelet circling his wrist.
“Maybe these were a gift. Dude what happened to not judging a book by its cover huh? ” the man replies, knowing the luxury he’s displaying but also trying to come off nonchalant.
“And maybe I’m secretly one of the actors tonight,” Regulus replies sarcastically.
The man just looks at him and rolls his own eyes at Regulus, “Alright dude, I relent,” he laughs at the whole exchange as if it just rolled off his back.
As they both decide on their drinks, chucking at the themed names, they chatted about what to expect for the night. They both knew that they could only expect dramatics and hijinks with the way they’d already been greeted as they entered the theater.
Just as their drinks arrive, the light dims and the actors start to file into the room.
Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Drunk Shakespeare,” a man with a thick beard says while dramatically throwing out his arms. “We welcome you to a night of mischief and revelry as we, your local Shakespeare enthusiasts, present you with Macbeth.”
“Now, as implied by the name, there is one actor among us who has been drinking all afternoon in preparation for this show. Come on out, he’s your Macbeth for the night, Jason Starely!” The thick bearded man gestures to another curtain and out stumbles a man who dashes around the the stage like an athlete ready to play a game, as the crowd whoops and claps.
Regulus thinks this is all ridiculous but he can’t wait to watch the entire thing unfold. The man quickly goes through the rules and requests of the cast and theater, with respectful participation highly encouraged before turning his theatrical voice back to the front.
“Now, the only thing we are missing is our lovely King and Queen to grace us with their presence,” the bearded man says theatrically as he saunters to stand behind two fake thrones at the front of the room.
“These thrones cannot sit empty, so we’ll need help filling these roles. We want to auction these two seats off to a lovely couple in the audience,” the man says as he starts the bidding.
Just as the bidding reaches one hundred dollars, something Regulus again, finds silly but assumes it’ll go to the good cause of keeping something like this running, he hears the man next to him speak up, “$300!” Regulus’s mouth drops open. He knew money when he saw it.
“Huzzah! $300, does anyone want to go higher?” the bearded MC says, looking around the room. Everyone who had been bidding previously kept their mouths tightly shut.
“Sold! To the man with the mess of curls!” the MC says gesturing to the thrones. “And who are you bringing up as your queen?”
The man next to him turns and gives Regulus a smirk before he takes the drink out of his hand, sets it down on the bench, and then drags him down through the stands toward the thrones.
They are each given a crown and cape to wear throughout the performance. “Well, how progressive of us. Looks like we’re actually in the presence of two kings tonight!” the MC exclaims, earning a chuckle from the crowd.
“Now our kings have an essential part to play during the show tonight. As you see Jason has been drinking, but we don’t think he’s drunk enough yet do we?” the MC addresses the crowd who give a resounding no.
“As we move through our performance, our kings will assess whether Jason seems too sober and if yes, you shall ring this dainty bell,” he said while dropping a small bell into Regulus’s lap.
“Once this bell sounds, the scene will come to an abrupt halt, and our wonderful, talented Jason here will be presented with a task to test his drunkenness, and if you, our lovely audience decree that he is not drunk enough, he will be presented with a delectable shot of…..peanut butter whiskey!”
The crowd lets out a small cheer and the man next to him laughs out his agreement, while Regulus is wondering how the fuck he got here. The man looks at him with a wide smile on his face, and Regulus feels like he’s orbiting the sun. He can’t help the smile that creeps onto his face and he’s decided to just let the moment happen.
As the play starts, immediately there are hijinks and mischief from all the actors, not just Jason, the drunk Macbeth. Regulus laughed more than he thought he would. How could he not, with the melodic laugh of the gorgeous sunshine stranger on the throne next to him?
Suddenly, he feels a hand in his lap and then he hears the tinkling of a bell.
All of the actors stop mid-sentence, as the MC comes from his perch behind the thrones, “Our first task of the night for young Jason Macbeth has come.”
Regulus couldn’t imagine what they were going to have this drunk man do to prove his drunkenness, but he decidedly sat up waiting for even more entertainment to unfold.
“Now if we could have an audience participant, no King Curls, you cannot be the one to participate,” the MC rolled his eyes in a joking manner as the man sitting next to Regulus started to raise his hand excitedly.
“Ah yes, you are the perfect candidate,” the MC gestures to a young woman in the crowd. “Now what we are going to have you both do is make free throw shots into these buckets. Though we’d like to make it even more difficult for our Macbeth, and he’s to lie on his back while throwing his shots,” the MC smirked at his friend across the room who looked exasperated already by the antics.
“Oh c’mon. That’s not even remotely fair!” Jason cried out, already resigned to his fate and lying on the floor.
“Now, when did I say your tasks would be fair?” the MC chuckles.
Both Jason and the audience members get in their positions waiting for the MC to shout their start.
As soon as the MC yelled go they were both tossing ping pong balls like crazy. The audience member even realized that she could stand as close as she wanted without any interference from the actors except for them to chuckle and egg her on.
Regulus let out a snort noticing the scheming going on in front of him. He turns to the man next to comment and realizes he’s already looking at him with a smile. Regulus looks away feeling his face heat up.
“And that’s time! Looks like we’ve got our winner. Our lovely volunteer has beat Jason 12 to 3.” The audience cheers as Jason stands up, is handed a shot of whiskey, and immediately shoots it back.
As the play resumes again, Regulus relaxes further, laughing at the butchered and improved lines and how the other actors were feeding into the drunk Macbeth’s antics to make for what could only be described as a once-in-a-lifetime show.
The stranger leans in again, as all eyes are on the monologue that Macbeth is having and whispers, “So, since you are actually on this stage tonight what do I get for proving you wrong?”
Regulus felt a shiver run through him and kept his gaze to the front, not daring to look at the man sitting next to him as he leaned back over chuckling. The cheek of this guy is ridiculous, but Regulus would be a liar if he said he didn’t have a smile on his face.
The antics of the cast got more rowdy as the night went on. Regulus and the man both continued to whisper to each other about how ridiculous the innuendos were getting and colluding to decide when the next bell should ring.
Before he knew it the play was coming to its dramatic end. Not the same end as Shakespeare’s original but close enough. The crowd laughs and whoops as the actors bow.
As they make their way out of the theater together, Regulus feels himself drawn to this stranger and doesn’t want the night to end here. This human sunshine, he kind of wants to keep orbiting around it some more.
They must be thinking the same thing because just as they step through the front doors said human sunshine turns his smile to Regulus and says, “I know this bar, it’s just around the corner. How’s about a drink?”
“Lead the way,” Regulus replies, secretly grateful he wasn’t the only one wanting to continue the night together.
The bar has a sign reading “Crown & Crow” and as they walk down into the basement bar level, Regulus immediately falls in love with the ambiance of this little hole in the wall. Very victorian pub and he couldn’t help but already see himself bringing his friends here and making it their spot.
Regulus follows the stranger through to the back of the bar and gives a surprised chuckle;e. All along the ceiling are “floating” candles and he can’t help but think of that one book about the magical school in the highlands of Scotland. Everything about this bar is right up his alley.
As they sit at a table, the stranger stands up again, “First round’s on me. For making you sit front and center all night,” he says with a wink. “What’s your drink of choice? Or should I make an educated guess?”
“Surprise me, but make it a double,” Regulus smirks, as the guy lets out a chuckle and skips over to the bar.
He stares at the back of the man and can’t help but feel his heart beat a little faster. Just as gorgeous as the front. He shakes his head realizing he’s going to get caught staring. He’s quick to grab his phone and check his messages.
Pandora sent another apology with a picture of her finished project. With the way the night has turned out, maybe he just might have to thank her for ditching him last minute. He starts to type out a quick response when the stranger returns to their table.
“One gin & tonic for you, Tanqueray of course,” the stranger announces, setting down the glass.
This stranger really has clocked Regulus very well. After quick cheers, he continues, “Now, we’ve been together all night. I think it’s about time I learned your name hmm?” he sips his beer never taking his eyes off Regulus. The glint in his eyes made Regulus feel hot all over.
“What is dude not working for you now?” Regulus replies coyly.
“Mysterious are you. Okay, I’ll bite but I think we’ve moved past dude. What about darling, sweetums, honeypie, babycakes?” he trails off giving a full-body laugh as Regulus rolls his eyes and takes another sip of his drink.
“Don’t be ridiculous. I’d never let someone call me sweetums.”
The stranger smirks, “Well what are you going to call me then? If we’re going to stick with this whole mysterious vibe you’re trying to build.” he takes a long sip of his beer still staring straight at Regulus.
Before Regulus can even filter himself he says “Soleil.”
“Was that fucking French?” the stranger chokes out.
“Oui, toi, magnifique peste,” Regulus replies back in French.
“Holy shit that’s so..” he starts but then trails off as if he’s just registering the last word Regulus said. “Wait did you just call me a pest? That’s not very nice of you muñeco.”
It’s Regulus’s turn to choke on his drink. He’s always been around different languages with his family, but holy shit is it hot coming from this man’s mouth.
He tries to gather himself and just mumbles out, “Spanish?”
“Si no podemos los dos jugar tu pequeño juego?” the man, soleil, smirks out.
If Regulus wasn’t already sitting down he’d probably be on his knees. Preferably in front of this man as he just continues speaking in Spanish.
Regulus shifts in his seat, ignoring the heat pooling in his stomach. Maybe it’s been a while but he’s never had someone affect him this quickly before with barely any flirting. But the way his voice deepens, wrapping around each word, it’s intoxicating.
The man moves his chair closer and leans in, “What’s the matter, muñeco Don’t want to play your game anymore?”
Regulus clenches his jaw, determined not to give the man any satisfaction at having beat him at his own game. “I just wasn’t expecting you to also be so…multilingual,” he says as the man is still leaning into his space.
“Oh, well I’m full of surprises muñeco. Should I keep going?” he says with a sparkle in his eyes.
Regulus swallows hard, the teasing has heated up quickly and he knows he’s so close to his breaking point. “Tu seras ma mort,” he mumbles out but knows they’re close enough that he’s heard.
“Muñeco how about we move this to somewhere more private hmm?”