Sirius is bored.
Harry’s gone to Hogwarts, Moony’s gone to work, and Molly Weasley are boisterous. She shrieked about ‘how she knows best’ 24/7 seven days a week like his dear mother making him insane. Walburga Black, now a painting, still screams about blood purity bullshit to everyone but luckily they know how to shut her down.
However Molly ‘The harpy’ Weasley, she can't be stopped. A nightmare, really.
Sirius ‘the convict’ Black, can't get out of his new prison. He’s locked in the old house of black, the place where his source of nightmare comes from. He had escaped Azkaban from soul sucking monsters and ended up locked here with a Harpy. Perfect, thank you Dumbledore.
He tried to understand the headmaster's logic. Sure , he can’t go outside because he’s a convict and Voldemort is back. But he’s an adult and an animagus for Merlin’s sake. He can go undetected, away from this house and this harpy!
Thank Merlin, this house has four levels. First Level where the Harpy ‘stall’ is, kitchen. Second level where the guest bedrooms are. Third and Fourth where his family bedroom, library, office and garden are.
Now ‘bored person’ Sirius opens his family library. Except for Moony and Hermione nobody will come here, a pity blessing really, because no one will know where he is now.
But what should he do now? Reading bored him and the library is a place where mountains of books to read come from. Furthermore, his books and magazines that he secretly added to the library were burned by Walburga years ago.
In his boredom, Sirius has the best idea after he broke out of Azkaban to hunt The Rat. He will go to his father’s hidden study here, maybe he will have a scandalous secret the old man has!
And here he is, sitting on his father’s study chair. His father has several lovely frames of his family on the table. He loves to tell stories about the pictures but now Sirius can’t remember what exactly his father said.
There are his grandad, grandma, lucretia and his father in 1932 smiling to the camera and themselves. There is his wedding with Walburga on the summer solstice with their happy smiles. There are baby pictures of him fisting his hand on the mouth and… Reg reached for the camera. Finally the family picture of his father and Reg laughing at Sirius’s attempt to destroy the family formal picture and a stern then smirking Walburga.
Wait , a smirking Walburga? What ?
Sirius tried to be more serious.
There! Stern Walburga ended up smirking at the end of the loop.
It's happening! It's real! For the name of Merlin’s bloody balls!
Sirius almost had a heart attack.
He needs to lay down and think. Yeah, wonderful idea.
When Sirius wanted to recline the chair, he saw a runic pattern on the table shelf. Sirius touches them and it's open. Inside, there is a brown red book with black family crest and a gold O.A.B pressed beautifully, then children's stuff, and a small velvet box.
This is it! The scandalous secret! Sirius slightly remembers how his father scribes in this book. When he wanted to see it, his father always denied him. He talks about secrecy and respect as a father to child and person to person. At that time he didn’t really understand.
Now, Sirius doesn’t give a damn because he’s bored and bewildered about smirking Walburga in his antics. He needs a little fun, a distraction from his busy mind.
Sirius opens the book, the first paragraph almost makes him laugh.
Sirius, you didn’t.
Then Sirius goes to another page.
Really child?
Then another.
Alright then, just be careful about the things my younger self writes. I didn't even know why I wrote it in the first place.
Yes, Sirius will have his amusement after all. Then another.
My cousin Walburga is the nicest and most beautiful person I have ever met.
Sirius snorted. His kid father is really funny or blind or crazy, you name it. Sure, in his father's standard Walburga is beautiful, but Sirius never has seen the "nicest" Walburga in his father's dictionary. To him the nicest Walburga is a couple stinging hex on the good day and crucio on the bad day.
She is always smiling and takes care of everyone but uncle and aunt gives her the cold shoulder because she’s a she.
Sirius tries to remember when his mother smiles. Never . Just a stoic face, with a little frown.
I want to save her.
Sirius Laughing, hard. Father you and your stupid hero complex, look at us now. Look at Reg, who died and we don't have the body to bury. Look at you, who died because of the heartbreak of losing Reg. Look at me, locked up in Azkaban then at our wrecked house. Look at her painting who sneers at everyone, she who has a blackest heart.
Then Sirius placed his thumb on the rune paper. He saw what his father saw. A glimpse of child Walburga smiling sweetly, without a frown. She has a darkest brown thick curly hair that gives them halo like when hit by the sunlight. Porcelain skin with a flush pink cheek. A small thin pink lips. But her eyes, bright steel grey that shone when looking at him. An angel, Sirius thought.
And Sirius choked. Who is this? Where has this version of his mother gone? Then Sirius goes to another.
Walburga is sick, she becomes colder and stricker. Maybe because she has two brothers now. She has to be a role model, her words not mine and I don’t understand. My sister, Lucy, too is a strict older sister but I know she loves me even if she's scary. I hope walburga becomes like Lucy.
Then Sirius saw Walburga, a little older with sadness on her face cradling baby Alphard. The grown adults talk happily with each other. Orion smiles gently when their eyes meet but her sweet smile is gone.
But Sirius knows what that means, Walburga pitying baby Alphard.
Sister Lucy is gone. Father said she’s died. But I know better, she just follows her heart just like she said. Mother weeps loudly then she gets smack from father. She’s just sad because Sister Lucy is elpoled(?) with a Weasley. I don’t know what that means but if my sister is happy, so be it.
Sirius saw how his father's family was broken bit by bit. How his sister smiled tiredly for the first time and left home the day after. The sound of his mother wailing and a hard smack in the face by his father. Orion’s body is stoic, but his mind is whirling.
Walburga goes to Hogwarts, but she said she will tell me about her adventour there. Then I have a friend the same age who lives nearby, her name is Medea Johnson. We played in the park after she came back from school. One day she asked why I didn't go to school with her, and I said I didn’t, I will go to faraway school when I turn eleven. She becomes sad and I do too. So we bought ice cream instead of playing. I think it's a good day.
Sirius saw his nice muggle neighbor when she’s a little kid, eating ice cream with his little father. It makes Sirius going ‘aww’ to puzzled in a second. What happened to his muggle hater father? Sirius remembers how his father and Walburga sneered at his neighbor, Mrs. Owen or Medea Owen neè Johnson, and she ignored them. She talks to Sirius and Reg instead. How peculiar, a riddle, and Sirius hates riddles.
It didn’t have double meaning, mind you. Iykyk*doggy wink*.
It’s almost christmas but Walburga didn’t send over even a single owl to me??? The blasphemy!! I will not give her a present this year!
Sirius laughs over his little father, maybe pouting like Reg because their faces are a copy of each other. Yes , here he is, pouting on the bed with a blanket over him. Sirius recalls ‘easily angry’ Reg but also easy to forgive everything. His baby brother, his ride or die, before everything changed for the worse. Yes , before he goes to Hogwarts and the sorting hat places him in Gryffindor. But it’s not 100% sorting hat fault, because Sirius wants to be different from his dark family.
He wants to go away from sadistic Walburga who torture him over little mistake. However, obedient Reg is her favorite, so he doesn’t know what Sirius felt about this family.
Everyone is busy for my birthday, even Medea. It’s the worst birthday ever!
After a few paragraphs, his father rewrote.
Nope! They’re just kidding. It’s the best birthday ever!
His kid father is so cute, Sirius thought.
Then He reads his kid father's shenanigan until dinner, then he goes to sleep. Free of nightmares for the first time in forever.