"Oh, can you imagine, I saw the Malfoys today. Those blond snobs haven't changed at all, you know! Years go by, and they're still the same. It's even a bit offensive, the war has battered us to the bone. So, I saw them, and I think..."
The darkness before Nott's eyes continues to wail something about cunning, vipers and a mixture of white ferrets and foxes, simultaneously banging porcelain plates and rattling metal tongs on the edges of what is probably a sugar bowl. The smell of herbal tea with chamomile and mint fills the room, making Theo smile and utter another ridiculous joke of his own. He waves his hand in the direction of the voice, gesturing quickly and sharply with his hands, hoping that he has caught Blaise's attention and he won't have to repeat himself.
«You want to poison me? Clever. Just know that I left all the money to little Stefan.»
"How can you?!" Zabini yells a little louder than he should, definitely clutching his heart theatrically. Nott can't see, but he clearly feels this action with the skin of his burnt eyelids. "Firstly, I am your faithful, lawful, beloved husband. And I'm not going to poison you! And secondly, he doesn't need such a boring godfather with his bald will. Little Steffie is satisfied with Pansy as a prim, boring mother, and you are a godfather!.."
Theo carefully holds back the laughter that is bursting out from someone else's angry puffing — Blaise will definitely be offended by such merriment and will stop talking to him until tomorrow morning. Or maybe he'll even go, get his favorite potion set and quietly whip up some potion with the most disgusting effect, which he'll then pour into Nott's soup in revenge. And the noble pureblood Theo will walk around the menorah and croak at the house elves running past. But on the other hand, how else can a poor blind man have fun if not driving his husband crazy? They've been together for... how long? About twenty years? Since the end of the war, for sure, he can't remember more specifically. When you live in absolute darkness, time in general and the world in general are perceived differently.
After all, he and Zabini really were such... fucking losers. Despite the fact that the war ended with the unconditional victory of the Dark Lord Voldemort, it seems like the two of them lost the most. Nott Sr. died shortly before the end of the general obscurantism, and Nott Jr. lost his sight due to multiple burns from the Hellfire that got out of control, which he himself created. It's called ancestral fire magic, yeah. Blaise was unlucky enough to be nearby during Bella's duel with one of the senior wizards of the Order of the Phoenix — the clash of spells blew up so much that an entire wing of the Longbottom manor captured by the Death Eaters crumbled, and along with it the flight of stairs where Blaise was bringing Parkinson, who was bawling her eyes out, to her senses. Pansy got off with a slight fright, but the guy was literally dragged to Merlin's light by the mediwitches from the Upside Down, so the loss of hearing after all the chaos did not seem like such a big problem. Burnt ears and a head injury were a laughable exchange for the opportunity to live.
That's how Theo and Blaise ended up under the same roof - blind and deaf. Thinking back, their first attempts at communicating with new opportunities were extremely awkward and embarrassing. It's just... one day Zabini had the brilliant idea to talk to Nott with notes, only he forgot that Theo was no longer visible and spent an hour trying to understand why he wasn't answering him. One could even laugh at this, but Nott, in fact, so infinitely appreciated the fact that Blaise stayed with him, despite all the difficulties and problems. Literally, no matter what. He helped teach his friend sign language, patiently lining up other people's fingers with houses-birds-squiggles. And Theo endlessly listened to Blaise's incessant chatter about everything in the world, periodically reacting to some news, just so that the second one understood that he was truly heard.
"...children are the flowers of life!" Zabini exclaims, sharply clapping his hands. Theo shakes his head affirmatively, and a treacherous smile finally appears on his lips. "You weren't listening to me at all, were you? And don't make excuses! Just because I can't hear your words doesn't mean I can't see your fucking mouth moving."
«Sorry, honey, but I was just wondering what our kids would look like. You're such a sexy bomb, so...» Nott carefully collects figures in the air with his fingers, straining all his senses in advance to accurately dodge the porcelain cup that might be flying at his head.
"This is disgusting, Theodore. Please don't ever compliment me again," Blaze hisses, starting to thrash around the Persian carpet indignantly, like a lizard on hot sand, while periodically kicking the legs of the chairs with his foot so that Nott could determine where his husband is. "Moreover, we are both men, and therefore we will not have children together. Either we accept bastards into the family, which do not exist, or we steal a Muggle-born and pour our blood into him under prayers. There are only two options. And neither of them is welcomed by the government."
«But why can’t we have a child together?» Nott arched an eyebrow demonstratively, feeling the skin of the scar on his temple stretch. «Let’s just raise a son in a cauldron. We can even have three. You are a potion maker! Everything will be fine.»
"I repeat once again, it is impossible. To get ingredients, permissions, rituals, knowledge, blood, forgive Merlin, those very cauldrons..."
«I don’t see a problem.»
"Mordred and Morgana, Theodore Nott, why did I marry you?!" a loud slap sounded. Theo delightedly assumed that it was Blaise’s hand that met his own chocolate skin.
The groan of despair only confirmed this guess.