The Spy and the Savior

Out of all the times Harry Potter had passed out, this was perhaps the most embarrassing. There was an abundance of people, mainly made up of The Order members, saved for Snape, who was near the back of the frown. There was a glint in his eyes of... something. Harry wanted to say it was concern, but he knew better than to expect or even think of that when it came to the bitter Potions Master. 

The first person to speak up was Remus, who's brows were knitted in concern and his lips in a tight grimace. "Harry... are you able to sit up?"

He nodded, forcing himself to sit up despite the dizziness it brought him. He glanced around the room, viewing the crowd. Tonks, Remus, Mrs. and Mr. Weasley, Shacklebolt, Moody, and Snape. His eyes lingered on Snape, narrowing his eyes as he was trying to recall what had occurred before he fell unconscious. A potion--Dreamless Sleep, he figured out--was slipped down his throat by someone. Voldemort's cackles replayed in his minds and so did his words. I never thought Severus would be worried about you. 

Voldemort knew Snape was alive.

His heart stopped and his face paled of what little color he had. His palms grew sweaty and his chest tightened until he was hardly able to breathe. I assured you already, Harry. He will die. Everyone you hold dear will die. Does the Chosen One truly believe he’ll succeed? Did Harry even believe that he could succeed? That against the most powerful dark wizard, he had a chance to defeat him and live to tell the story? What could he defeat Voldemort with, Gryffindor bravery and the power of friendship? He didn't even know where the majority of the horcruxes were! How many more would die because of him? How many already did? James Potter, Lily Potter... Cedric Digory and Sirius Black... shit, there were most likely more that he didn't even know they existed! The very thought made him sick.

He wasn't aware he was shaking until Remus spoke up again. "Harry?" 

"Mhm?" He forced himself to look up at the werewolf, his breathing still irregularly quick. He hated how that simple hum was the only thing he could force out of his throat. He should have been able to say more. You should have been able to save them. He told himself not to linger on the lifeless face of Cedric, or the look of grief on Amos Diggory's face. He told himself not to linger of the fading life from Sirius' eyes. He told himself not to remember their dead faces or the guilt. It didn't do anything. Their deaths--everyone's deaths, whether they had already happened or whether they were to come--flashed through his mind. 

"Potter." Snape's voice snapped him out of his mind, and forced him to look up at the Slytherin. "Perhaps, it would be wise if you would listen and answer our questions."

"Perhaps it would be wise if you weren't in the room," snapped Remus, who was scowling heavily at the Potion Master. Snape sneered and scoffed in response.

"Remus." Shacklebolt warned calmly, silently commanding the two men to behave themselves.

"He killed Dumbledore! If that isn't enough, he was an active Death Eater and the Dark Lord's cowardly lapdog-"

"You. know. Nothing!" Snape growled at, his mouth twisted into a murderous scowl. He took a step closer to Remus, ignoring the wands that were suddenly pointed at him. "Do not call me a coward," he spoke in a dangerously low voice. Remus huffed a dry, humorless laugh. But before the werewolf could further insult Snape, Mrs. Weasley spoke.

"Harry, my dear... what did you see?" 

Harry stared at Molly. The woman who practically took him in ever since his 1st year. The woman who considered him basically another son. He glanced down at his lap, focusing on worn, faded, blue jeans. He didn't speak for a moment, trying to find the proper words to say. What could he say? That Voldemort was already aware of the Slytherin still being alive? That Voldemort promised to make sure all of Harry's loved ones were in body bags by the end of the war? Everything that resided in his dreams/visions seemed far too horrible to admit to anyone, let alone the ones he considered family.

He exhaled deeply and finally spoke. "Voldemort... he knows Snape is alive." he mumbled, trying his best to calm himself down, focusing on his breaths and how fast or slow he inhaled and exhaled.

No one spoke, which made it harder for Harry to regulate his panic. The Gryffindor boy forced himself to look up at the sharp and biting professor. He immediately noticed the tension in the man's black eyes, and how his eyebrows knitted together, and how his lips were in a tight and thin line. He had a feeling that his previous teacher already knew of this. Harry's eyes noticed the position the man was standing in, crossed arms and rigid posture. To many, it look like Snape was a constantly on-edge person, which he was, but if the boy looked close enough, he could see the tight grip Snape was keeping on his left forearm, and the small beads of sweat that was collecting on his neck. He could only imagine the torture Voldemort was currently putting Snape through, and in an odd way, he felt a respect for the Potion Master to keep it so well hidden. 

"Leave us be." said Snape, breaking the silence in the room.

"What." Remus barked. "No. Absolutely not!" The rest silently agreed. All of The Orders' eyes were wearily studying the man. Snape wasn't ever truly trusted by them, he had lost all remaining slivers of trust within the last month, on the night he killed Dumbledore. "Whatever you need to discuss with Harry, I'm sure you'll need to discuss with us as well."

Snape glanced between the Golden Boy, then to Remus, then back to Harry again. He let out a sigh through his nose. "We need to discuss Potter's legal guardians..."

"No we don't." Harry countered curtly. "What needs discussing?"

Snape cocked an unamused eyebrow at the boy's words and frowned. "The bruises on your back, perchance?"

"Bruises," Remus snapped. "Harry, what bruises? Did Snape--"

"I didn't do anything." The Potions Master had to force his tone to remain calm, his eyebrows creased before he continued. "I would appreciate if you quit sputtering out accusations."

"Accusations? Oh, I wouldn't put it above you to do something like that to Harry! You've always hate an immense hatred for him." 

Snape simply hummed and turned around fully to face the other man. "Tell me, Lupin... does you arse ever get jealous of the amount of shit that spurs out of your mouth?" His voice was completely even, and his straight-face expression didn't faltered for even a quick second. Before Remus could hex Snape, Harry spoke up.

"He's right. He didn't do anything," to Harry's horror, he was defending the bitter professor... and he meant it. He felt the shift of everyone's eyes from Snape to him, and he was swiftly reminded of how much he loathed spotlight. 

"Harry..." Molly spoke up again. "You needn't not to lie--"

"I'm not lying!" Harry snapped, thought it hadn't meant to. An array of emotions boiled within him. He loathed how his word couldn't be trusted by the ones who were meant to believe him. "I'm not lying. Professor Snape didn't lay a finger on me." He said more calmly this time around. "But my homelife isn't worth talking about."

"Isn't. worth. talking. about," Snape drew out his words, like he always did. "Your uncle, quite literally, manhandled you and shoved you in your room, locking you in there."

"Well-"

"Not only did he trap you within that room, but he had no intentions to give you any form of food until you gave in and attempted to something that you did not even do!" The man's voice grew a bit louder, his expression darkening as he continued. "They are very much 'worth talking about'." 

"We have bigger issues at hand! What about Voldemort knowing you're alive! Or what about me going out and hunting Horcruxes! Or--"

"Harry," said Remus in a soft voice. "For once, I think we all agree with Snape."

"I don't!"

"You," started Snape in a low growl. "have been abused for your entire life without you knowledge--"

"I'M NOT ABUSED!" he yelled. Immediately he flushed and wish he had chosen his words better, or at least kept his emotions in check. Control your emotions. Snape had once said to him during their Occlumency lessons. Discipline your mind. A skill Harry had lacked, over a year later.

The room again, for what seemed to be the thousandth time in thirty minutes, fell into a tense atmosphere for a few moments. 

"Perhaps, it would be best if we left Harry to rest. I'm sure he's still tired." Remus suggested, glancing to the others who were nodding in agreement. Harry watched as the adults filed out, one by one, before it was just Snape and him in the room. The Potion Master studied him for a moment, his brows knitted together.

“What?” The boy said sharply, frowning at the professor. 

Snape’s grimace only seemed to deepen and he turned and followed the other members out.

~~~

“You’re in one of our many safe houses,” Remus explained after Harry had gotten some proper rest. The two were alone in the kitchen, having tea together. “We couldn’t afford to use Grimmauld Place after Dumbledore’s death and we didn’t want… him knowing where we operate. We reside mainly at the Burrow now, but have multiple locations if things turn ugly.”

Harry gave a simple hum, staring down at his tea that has now gone cold. He was too preoccupied to enjoy it. “Where’s Snape?”

Remus’ soft grin faltered and he had lowered. Before Dumbledore’s death, Remus had often been at least respectful to the Potion Master, despite their tumultuous behavior turning their school years. Now, it seemed all the members had a rather clear disdain towards the man. Harry didn’t blame them.

”Why, he’s probably in his room,” the werewolf waved a dismissive hand. “Snape isn’t to leave here until we decide what to do with him.” The man’s eyes focused on Harry, his sullen expression became more intense. “Are you absolutely positive he did not harm you while you two were together?”

Harry’s eye gave a subtle twitch and so did his lip. “Why is everyone doubting me about that? Yes, I’m positive he didn’t cause me any harm while being trapped with me.” 

Remus held up a hand in defense and sighed. “That leads us to another subject. What Snape said about your relatives, are they true?”

The Golden Boy’s throat tightened and so did his chest. He gripped his teacup tightly and couldn’t bring himself to meet the man’s gaze. “It really wasn’t that bad,” he mumbled.

”Harry…”

”I’m fine!” His irritation started to boil up again. “They were a little harsh at times, yes. But nothing abusive!” 

“Bruises are considered harsh?” Remus cocked an eyebrow. “Harry, you can tell us if you’re not safe at home.” 

“I’m not safe anywhere!” An ache in his scar slowly ignited. “I never have been! For the past 6 years, I have been hunted down by a murderous dark wizard, even while I was at Hogwarts!”

”I understand your frustration, but we’ve always tried our best—“ 

“IT ISN’T ENOUGH!” He yelled, the ache turned into burning and his chest only tightened even more. The teacup shattered and was soon followed but the shards clattering against the floor.

“Harry—calm down!”

“NO!” His head throbbed and he could hear his blood rushing. “DON’T TELL ME HOW TO FEEL! YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND MY FRUSTRATION BECAUSE YOU’VE NEVER BEEN THROUGH IT!” His vision blurred with steaming, hot tears. His voice cracked a bit as he shouted. He felt like a six-year-old throwing a tantrum, and he hated it. He loathed the vulnerability he was showing and the concern that he was receiving.

Before Remus could say anything else, he bolted out of the room, his breathing erratic and uncontrollable. He knocked into someone, and turned to see Snape, the Slytherin’s brows were knitted and his eyes were wide. He didn’t stop when he called out his name, he only stopped when he got to the room he waked in and locked the door.

Harry slumped onto the bed, trying to ignore his headache and the burning in his scar. He forced the tears to not spill. He laid down on his bed, hearing Snape and Remus bickering again.

”What did you say?” The venom in Snape’s tone was more pungent than usual, Harry could practically feel his snarl.

”I didn’t say anything! He just snapped and bolted out!” Remus shot back, matching the other man’s tone. 

The two continued to argue as Harry closed his eyes, wishing for it to all stop and for a peaceful sleep.