A Distant Song
Mitsuki sat on the couch, fidgeting with her blanket as she tapped her foot to an off-beat rhythm. For th e past few weeks, Mitsuki has been dedicating more and more time to her music career, switching from her usual rock music to metal. Every now and then, she’ll check her notebook, write a few lyrics, record a melody, and hide away in her studio to make music. She’s been going on tours ever since her music career took off. Her first metal album skyrocketed in listeners. Yet, despite all of her success, she wasn’t happy. She loved touring, producing, singing… she loved what she did, but the person she loved seemed to be distant now. Aya would walk into the kitchen that was just across from the living room. “Aya…” Mitsuki mumbled. It was like she was millions of kilometers away. Aya was in her own world, listening to her rock music through some headphones, and was turning a deaf ear to Mitsuki. It’s been like this ever since Mitsuki got into her metal phase. “Aya,” said Mitsuki, calling out to her lover, but she received no response. Frustrated, she stood up and walked over to Aya, reaching behind her to take her headphones off.
“Aya-san, we need to talk.” Mitsuki looked into the warm eyes of Aya, who seemed surprised. “Listen, we’ve been distancing ourselves from each other for a while. I’m… I don’t think this is working out.” Aya would look confused and clench her fists. “What do you mean?” “Aya, I don’t think we should be together. I… I’m sorry, but I’m just not feeling the same way anymore.” Aya’s eyes would brim with tears. “Mitsuki, what are you talking about? I mean, sure, we’re in a rough spot right now, but it’ll get better, right? We’re not arguing-” Mitsuki would cut her off. “Because we haven’t been talking at all. It’s like we’re strangers again.” Aya grabbed Mitsuki with a trembling hand. She looked and stared into those deep black eyes, trying to find the girl she loved inside. She stared and looked, but all she found was an empty husk that was dulled and eroded. The smell of cigarettes, a smell that used to disgust Aya, was oddly comforting now. All because of her. “What happened to us?” Mitsuki sighed. “That’s what I want to know.” “Are we so different that we can’t be together anymore?” “We bonded over our love for rock and grew closer. That was in highschool. I… You liked me for my looks, then for my music… but you can’t even hear my music anymore. You stopped going on tour with me.” “Because I don’t like metal! It’s so aggressive and loud. It scares me!” Mitsuki paused. Her music… scared Aya? It scared her? The one thing that brought them together, her beloved music… Is it scaring her? “Aya, what do you mean loud and aggressive? It’s expressive, just like all other music.” Aya pushed herself away. “Yes, but all I hear is your rage. When I close my eyes and listen to your music, all I can hear are empty words and screaming to relieve your frustration, your rage, your anger… your loneliness. And it makes me wonder why you never spoke to me about this. I don’t want you to scream just to express yourself. I want you to talk to me. Stop carrying your burdens by yourself. Please. Just this once… Rely on me.”