Even Stranger Things

"Thank you, for giving us a ride."

Sirianna stood right in front of Billy and had her hands at her sides, like she didn't know if she could touch him. Billy took her hands, put them on his sides, pulled her closer by his jacket that she wore. She looked good in it, her dark hair spilling over the back, Billy's favorite cologne wrapped around her.

"Don't mention it." Billy tipped his head to the side, flashed her a smile. "You can pay me back, I'm sure."

"I…" Her hands tightened on Billy's side and it was too fucking easy to see her sudden nerves. God, she was cute as fuck, funny, fiery when she wanted to be - Billy forgot she tended to take everything literally.

"I meant this." Billy ducked down, because she was fucking tiny and it shouldn't be a turn on how much fire one little thing like her could hold, but fuck if it didn't work for him. He kissed her slow, he wasn't trying to catch some perv charge in front of the Chief of Police's house.

Not that it mattered, Sirianna was into it. She leaned up on her toes and pressed her lips more eagerly against Billy's, held his shirt tightly in her hands at his sides. Billy did not let his hand slide down to her ass, he kept it on her back - thanks - as he pulled her a little closer.

It was going to be a shit night, might as well milk every moment of something good he could.

And Sirianna was good. God damn, she was good. She was - she was good, that was the point. Billy liked flirting with her, he liked her wearing his jacket, and he sure as shit liked to kiss her.

It made him feel fucking fourteen again, like he was back in Cali, walking around the boardwalk with Jo. They walked hand-in-hand up and down the boardwalk, all over the beach. They surfed together, stayed out late and pretended like they could see the stars together. Neil had been preoccupied with his fiancé, the fiancé's kid; nobody missed Billy much.

It had been the best summer of Billy's life.

Sirianna was the first chick in the hicktown Neil moved him to that reminded him of Jo. They didn't look a damn thing alike - Jo had been tan, blonde, blue eyed. But it was something about seeing them get riled up, seeing them speaking up when some shit seemed unfair. Jo had also once decked some bitch in the face then went right back to eating popcorn.

So Billy had a type, whatever. It didn't have to mean shit. Sirianna was new, stuck out like a broken thumb - she'd get used to Hawkins, find someone else. Or she'd see that Billy couldn't change, wouldn't, and ditch him.

Until then, Billy was having a good time.

"I have to go inside." Sirianna pulled away and her cheeks were red, her eyes sparkling in the way that chicks did sometimes. Billy liked her eyes, liked them when she was smiling at him. Billy liked when she smiled at him.

"Yeah." Billy sighed, figured he was pushing it anyway. Billy was supposed to be home after school, Neil was off on Mondays and he had wanted Billy home after school for chores.

‘Chores' always wound up being bullshit and just an excuse for Neil to show Billy that he wasn't shit. It sounded a hell of a lot more appealing for Billy to take Sirianna and Harry to Indianapolis and get a taste of the city. The music was playing though and Billy needed to face it.

"Hey, call Byers for a ride tomorrow," Billy told Sirianna when she seemed as uninterested in going home as Billy was.

"Are you not going to school?" she asked and Billy nearly smiled because she definitely sounded disappointed that time.

"I'll be there," Billy said - maybe. If he went, he would be right on time, no time to stop and pick up a pretty passenger. "I'll be late though, so you'll have to ask Byers for a ride."

"Oh, okay." Sirianna took another step backward, couldn't stand to be away from her brother for more than a minute. "I'll see you tomorrow then?"

Billy nodded and kept up his crooked half-grin until she made it inside the house. Then Billy ran a hand through his hair and sighed.

Time to face the music.

Billy drove home carefully, paying attention to the speed limit more to stall than anything. It was Monday, Neil had work in the morning. It was going to suck, but not as much as it could.

It would have sucked no matter what, delaying the blow up just meant less time Billy had to deal with the shit. It would have been an all day event if Billy returned by three, at least this way Billy handed Neil a reason to be pissed on a silver platter.

Irresponsible Billy, can't show up on time. Irresponsible Billy, didn't understand the concept of respect. Irresponsible Billy, who was going to end up in jail like every other useless piece of shit there was.

Billy heard it all and he just didn't care anymore. Sure, maybe the shit got in his head when he was like ten, but who cared? Jail, prison, a gutter - they were all looking like fucking paradise lately.

Neil's car was in the driveway when Billy pulled up to the curb, Susan's car was gone. It was never a good sign when Susan wasn't there, it meant Neil had no reason to be quiet, no reason to temper himself. Susan would make sure that her kid wasn't near the bomb, so who cared if Billy himself was blown up?

Not Susan, not Neil, not Billy.

Billy left his shoes on the porch, tucked his car keys under the steps. Neil hadn't taken his car in a while, but there was never a reason to risk it. The house was quiet, didn't smell like anyone cleaned a fucking thing. It was never dirty, because God forbid, but Mondays were for cleaning.

Cleaning and bitching about Billy's work ethic, his hair, his clothes. Anything really, Neil would find anything to bitch about until he pushed Billy into mouthing off some remark and then it would be a fight.

Every. Fucking. Time.

Billy took a deep breath on the porch, settling himself. He needed to keep his fucking mouth shut, get it over with. There was only one way the day was going to go and he knew it the second he told Sirianna he'd give her a ride.

Damn her for saying she'd ask Harrington instead.

As soon as he was good, Billy opened the front door. It didn't even get a chance to shut before Billy was grabbed by the collar of his shirt and slammed against the wall by the door.

"What part of home by three did you not understand?" Neil was in Billy's face and that had him pissed - pissed in a way he couldn't get.

"I had practice," Billy lied, tilting his chin up. Stand tall, shoulders squared, chin up. Don't fucking cry, don't fucking backtalk.

Neil cracked his hand across Billy's face anyway because Billy was a dumbass. A dumbass with a cheek that burned from shame as much as it did any sort of pain.

"Try again," he demanded.

Neil didn't know the practice schedule, couldn't care less. The only way he would know he was lying was if Max said something. And she might have, fuck if Billy knew.

"I had practice, sir," Billy said again. "Our first game is coming up, coach added it. I didn't have time to tell you."

Max must not have said shit because all Billy got was another open backhand.

"There is always time to be fucking responsible, William," Neil said. He shoved Billy to the side, knocked him off-balance and Billy had to catch himself on the floor. "If you planted your God damned feet…" Neil sighed, because Billy was a constant disappointment. It was Billy's fault he fell, Billy's fault that he couldn't do shit right for Neil. "Go to your room, I'll be there in a minute."

"Yes, sir." Billy picked himself back up and didn't walk around Neil, he didn't need to bother. It was the same sorry routine - Neil would send Billy to his room, he'd have a beer, and Billy would get his ass handed to him when he was done.

It was the same sorry routine that Billy had followed since the summer after his mom left. Billy hoped she was happy, he hoped she was really fucking happy wherever she was.

Billy wasn't in terrible shape the next morning. He checked himself over after a shower that was as much torture as it was relief. A few bruises on his side, probably a mark or two on his back judging from the soreness. There was a dark bruise over his eye, not too swollen to deal with. The busted lip was always the bitch, it burned every time Billy lit up.

He could go to school, he shouldn't though. He knew if he went that he'd only end up having to leave and if Neil got another call about a suspension… nah, better to skip.

Max fidgeted in the passenger seat during the drive to the school and Billy saw her open her stupid mouth twice, closed it twice, finally said something the third time.

"I didn't tell him," Max said quietly, her fingers twisting around in her lap. "I told him I didn't know what you were doing."

Billy didn't say anything, just kept his eyes on the road.

"Are you - are you okay?"

"Fine, shitbird," Billy said. "Just shut the fuck up."

"Do you have a headache?"

"Yeah, it's called Maxine." Billy reached out to turn the radio up as loud as it would go, an effective way of drowning out Max's whining. What the fuck did she have to whine about? Max had a peachy fucking life. All she had to do was run to her mom and Neil never so much as raised his voice at her.

"I'll see you after school?" Max asked when Billy pulled up to the middle school, a cigarette tucked between his lips no matter what Sally-the-parking-lot-monitor wanted to make faces about.

"Be on time or ride your fucking skateboard," Billy warned her. Billy wasn't going to be late, he wasn't going to risk setting Neil off twice in two days.

"Don't you have practice?" Max was stalling for some reason, holding Billy up with stupid questions.

"I'm not going," Billy said. Hard to practice when it was fifty-fifty odds that Billy would be told to play skins. "Get the fuck out, Max."

"I - do you swear that you'll be here after school?"

Billy reached in the back and snatched her backpack then threw it as far out her half-opened door as he could. ‘Sally', or whatever he name was, made some fucking noise about disrespectful. Billy could write twenty fucking essays on respect.

"Out. Go," Billy snapped. Just because he was ditching didn't mean that Max could be late. Max pulled on her hair and Billy rolled his eyes behind his sunglasses. "I will fucking be here, don't worry. I won't run away and leave you to take my place."

Max's eyes grew until she looked stupid, she also looked like she was about to cry and that was the last straw. Max did not get to cry about a damn thing. "Billy! That's not what I—"

Whatever she meant, it didn't matter. Billy pushed her door open and then gave her a shove out of it. Max tripped, landed on her ass. Sally was yelling at Billy then, running to help poor Max up even if she was already climbing to her feet.

Billy flipped the old woman off, slammed Max's door shut, then started driving.

If Billy couldn't get through Max's bullshit, he wasn't going to last ten minutes at the school full of privileged little hicks whose biggest issue was finding a throat to stick their tongue down.

The quarry was the best place for Billy to spend the day. The school could mark him absent, they wouldn't call Neil as long as Billy went the next day. It meant Billy had seven hours of silence, seven hours of sitting beside some water and closing his eyes without worrying about anyone else being around.

It was the closest thing to peace that Billy could find in Bumfuck, Indiana.

And it only lasted two hours.

Billy had a bottle of booze under the backseat in the Camaro, some cheap shit he swiped from the last party he had crashed. It tasted like ass, but Billy wasn't drinking for the taste.

Billy was drinking because his chest kept tightening up and he would start choking and then there would be fucking tears on his face and he was over it. He was over crying, he was over nursing his fucking wounds and telling himself that he was almost there - almost to eighteen.

Only… sixteen more months.

Sixteen months and Billy could get the fuck out of Indiana, get back to California. He'd need to be smarter with saving and storing the cash he could make during the summer, maybe even try and open his own bank account.

One of the seniors, a real babe, told Billy that she made a ton of money working the pool last summer. She said if he was interested that she could let him know when they held classes for guards. There had been a wink and Billy had been interested - real interested.

In the job.

If Billy could get the job, save the money up during the summer… he could pick up some odd jobs during the school year, maybe start soon with that. Surely there were some old ladies who didn't want to run errands and would pay Billy to do it, or some moms too busy to run their brats to soccer practice or whatever. He wouldn't make a killing, but his savings were pretty well shot after Neil found his hoard and he needed to start rebuilding.

Billy was not staying in Indiana one extra fucking day. He'd push his fucking car to California if he had to.

Billy was reclined back against his windshield, enjoying a cigarette and the brief feeling of sunshine on his face. It wouldn't last long, Indiana was already colder than Santa Barbara got in the dead of winter and it was only fucking November.

It was going to be a cold ass winter, Billy wasn't looking forward to it. Neil's favorite game to do on weekends was kick Billy out for any reason at all. It was fine in the spring, wasn't terrible during the summer, but the last time Billy slept in his car in early October had been fucking cold.

If nothing else, he'd need to toss a few extra blankets in his trunk and hope that Susan didn't mention it to Neil. Maybe if Billy got a move on trying to earn some cash he could pick up a sleeping bag at the army resale store downtown, at least then he wouldn't fucking die in his backseat like a God damned loser.

Billy was debating the easiest way to try and find some odd jobs, something that wouldn't get back to Neil, when he heard someone walking down the trail. It wasn't even eleven yet, it had to be some ambitious hiker, some burned out stoner, or —

"Billy?"

Or it would be the very last person Billy wanted to see him when he was a fucking wreck. Billy, stupidly, thought maybe if he didn't fucking move or breathe that it wouldn't be Sirianna's voice he heard or her footsteps coming closer. Billy wiped his face, flipped his sunglasses down.

"Shouldn't you be at school?" Billy asked when she was close enough that he could see her from the edge of his vision. She looked cute, all dressed up in some girl skirt thing and with Billy's jacket thrown on top of it all.

It made Billy kind of crazy, seeing her in his jacket.

"Shouldn't you?" Sirianna leaned on the car, tried to get closer even when Billy turned his head away from her. "Billy? Are you - you're hurt. What happened?"

Billy tightened the grip on the bottle of cheap ass tequila he had, took another drink to burn down the knot in his chest. Of course she would notice, of course she would go looking.

It was why Billy noticed her, wasn't it? Birds of a feather or whatever the fuck.

"I'm fine," he muttered, refusing to turn and look at her. If her eyes were all sad then Billy wouldn't be able to stand it, he hated when people made sad eyes at him. Pity pissed him off, sad made him want to claw his skin off.

"You're lying." Sirianna said it simply, she wasn't one to bullshit. She climbed up on the hood, carefully kept her shoes from scuffing the paint, and rearranged herself until she was laying beside him.

She was fucking magic, that was all. Not the actual magic shit that Billy couldn't think too much about or he'd lose his shit - but just her. There was just something about her that ripped at the perfect mask Billy had for the rest of the world and exposed his real face.

The mask was better, she would like the mask.

"Your lip…" Sirianna was turned on her side, staring at him. "What happened?" she asked again.

"Go back to school," Billy said, making his words a hard demand, trying to get her to fucking go. She didn't want to listen to him bitch, Billy didn't want to. For the love of God, he wanted one easy fucking thing in his life.

As it turned out, the fucking witch with the weird as shit queer twin was the simplest fucking thing Billy had. It was all he had, which was fucking pathetic but true.

Sue him that he didn't want to fuck it up already.

"I can't. I'm sick." Sirianna coughed, fake as fuck, and it nearly made Billy grin. He started to, then stopped when it pulled on the cut crossing his lower lip.

"Yeah, you sound sick," he said sarcastically. "Guess I'm sick too." Billy didn't bother coughing, just took another drink and made sure he didn't spill any on himself that time.

"Great, now that we've established we're both sick…" Sirianna scooted closer and she was so fucking innocent. Not innocent, she knew the world sucked, Billy could tell. Sirianna had been through some shit, though Billy couldn't pin the specifics. But she was fucking - fucking - she was scooting closer to him with her big fucking eyes and her soft lips and she had no idea.

None.

"Did you get in a fight?" Sirianna asked, quiet like she knew he didn't.

Billy arched an eyebrow, doubted she could see it.

"You could say that." He took another drink and then capped it to drop on the ground by the car when he figured he had enough. Too much more and Billy would be weeping like a bitch, too much more and he'd sleep through picking up Max and then Neil would be pissed.

"I think you're lying…" Sirianna lifted her hand up and Billy could have smacked it away if he wanted to, she moved it real slow. But Billy was weak and he closed his eyes instead so she could lay it gently on his cheek.

Sirianna didn't say anything when she used her thumb to push up his glasses, didn't make a sound about the black eye. Billy stayed silent too, he didn't even flinch when her thumb traced the mark lightly. It felt nice, really. Her skin was smooth, cold, gentle.

"You didn't get in a fight," she said, whispering it because she really wanted to make it all that much fucking worse. Billy was already breathing hard, already shaking inside. She needed to shut up, not —

"Someone hit you, at least twice… you - your dad. Right?"

Billy's breath caught and he squeezed his eyes hard, too late, against her dead on aim. Only one tear fucking fell, one tear because he was tired and sore and miserable and about to ruin the only fucking thing he had. He swallowed hard, fought to keep his voice steady even if his fucking cry baby shit was trying to give him away.

"You don't know what you're talking about, Sirianna," he warned her. He reached up to take her hand, remove it from his face, but his fingers had a mind of their own as they interweaved with hers and held her hand right where it was.

"I think I do." Sirianna lifted her head up and Billy kept his eyes closed, didn't think he could look at her without everything shattering inside him. It was fine, shattering when he was alone. That was half the reason he went to the quarry on the shit days, but he didn't want her there to see, to remember.

It didn't matter, because she was a damned witch. The second Sirianna pressed her lips as soft as could fucking be against the corner of Billy's lips, he lost it.

Billy turned away, clenched his jaw as hard as he could, and buried his face in the crook of his arm. It always fucking happened, because Billy was an idiot, he just didn't want her to see him so fucking broken and worthless.

The mask was good, the front everyone bought. Billy was charming, Billy was a smooth talker, Billy was an asshole but - hey - that was part of the charm. Billy was a fucking joke, too damned pathetic to fix a single fucking thing in his life, too fucking tired to even try anymore.

God, he was so fucking tired. It was always the same shit and it wasn't going to fucking change for sixteen months.

Billy curled his knees up, wished with everything inside of him that Sirianna would fucking go. Leave. Get far the fuck away.

She didn't. She put a hand on Billy's head and stroked his hair while he tried to force himself to break down and build back up in double time. Pedal to the floor, get it over with. If he was going to make a fucking scene, he wanted it to be quick.

And then he didn't want to fucking see her again.

Billy didn't want to see the pity, hear the questions. He didn't want her to sit around, acting fucking concerned. Billy couldn't make himself stop, couldn't fucking control himself, but he would that. He didn't think Sirianna would tell anyone, she had plenty of secrets she kept about herself, but Billy didn't want her to even know.

When Billy thought he could breathe right, when his chest ached in the normal way, he started wiping his face on his sleeve and planned on telling her to fuck off. She had been the one untainted thing, the one thing that was just for Billy, and it wasn't Neil who ruined it, but Billy.

How was that for personal fucking accountability?

Then Sirianna started talking, because Jesus fuck she could talk sometimes —

"— then it's step left, arms do a winding thing up. Step back, wind down the arms. Two steps right, do a sort of rustling thing? Where we shake our pom poms slowly in another wind up, then we have too—"

"What?" Billy choked on his own question, maybe she had been talking for a while and he didn't notice it because he had no idea what the fuck she was on about. That alone made him turn his head, turned to face her.

"I didn't want to say something stupid so I - I was just talking," Sirianna said. Her hand was still tangled in Billy's hair and Billy hated her big wet eyes, not pity-filled, but sad.

"You should go." Billy reached up and did make himself remove her hand from his hair. He placed it gently on her own hip and then pulled his hand away, didn't touch her at all. They were close, that was it. She should leave.

"Can I have a cigarette?" Sirianna asked. "Just one?"

Billy sighed loudly because he could, because one fucking cigarette wasn't going to be the end of it. He shoved himself up in a seated position, something a little less vulnerable, and pulled a knee to his chest while he dug for his pack of smokes. He took two out, lit one for her before lighting one for himself.

Sirianna was quiet, Billy doubted she would be for long. Harry kept shit bottled up, Sirianna liked to talk.

Sure as shit, Billy only had two good draws of nicotine in his lungs before she started talking.

"Our parents died when we were one, murdered actually…"

God damn, she wasn't doing great with relatives living, was she?

"Our aunt and uncle raised us, sort of, for ten years. Our uncle, he - well, he rather hated Harry. Harry could never do anything right, he could never be good enough for Uncle Vernon. And - and so Uncle Vernon used to beat on him, quite badly, really."

Yeah, that tracked. Billy figured as much, didn't know if it was someone before the man who owned the diner or not, but Harry was off enough that he thought it might have gone back further.

It was why Billy had slammed his fist in Kevin Arnett's teeth on the twins' first day. Arnett made some smart comment about jumping Harry and Billy didn't like the idea of seeing Harry jumped anymore than he'd want to see a beaten dog get kicked again.

"Harry doesn't talk about it, I think he's forgotten, really. He knows our relatives weren't nice, that he wasn't happy there, but I think that so many bad things happened he just - forgot? I don't know. I wish I could forget."

Billy breathed in deeply, filled his body with smoke, then blew it all out so it could fly across the quarry.

"Yeah, me too."

They didn't talk much after that, not about his dad or her uncle. Billy laid back against his windshield again and Sirianna scooted over until she fit just right in his arm. She asked about California, Billy asked where she grew up.

Sirianna grew up in England, in fucking England. Billy teased the shit out of her about tea and crumpets (Billy had no idea what crumpets were, but it sounded like an England thing). Sirianna said she could picture him surfing when he talked about California, Billy told her that she'd be fucking drooling if she saw it.

When she laughed and the breeze blew, Billy relaxed. It wasn't a bad way to waste the day, it wasn't a bad day to sit by the quarry with a pretty girl beside him and just talk.

"Where's baby bird at?" Billy asked her after a lull between them. Billy was already starting to grin when she huffed and rolled her eyes - as if Harry didn't fit the fucking image of a baby bird.

He was all awkward wings he didn't know how to use, big eyes that were always looking for his mama hen. If Max was that clingy, Billy didn't think he'd be able to stand her. Sirianna didn't seem to mind, Billy thought she was probably just as bad.

Billy didn't think he would mind, if she got clingy with him. Chicks did it sometimes and Billy pushed them away, made sure they knew that he wasn't interested. Sirianna was - Billy didn't want to push her away, he wanted her as close as she could get, wrapped up in his jacket, smiling just for him.

It would change, shit always did, but it was good until then.

"His name is Harry," Sirianna reminded him, like Billy didn't know. "And he's at school. He was worried about you actually, I told him that I'd be back by the time gym ends."

Billy looked down, raised an eyebrow. "Harry was worried about me?" he asked, calling her on her shit. That kid had ninety-nine fucking problems and Billy was not one of them.

"Well… we both were." Sirianna blushed, a pretty pink flush of her cheeks. "He's in a mood today anyway, he'll be fine."

Billy made a sound, just something so she knew he heard her, and settled back down. They would have to leave soon, Billy didn't want to. It was the quarry and it was Sirianna, it was just a peaceful little bubble that Billy didn't expect to have in Indiana.

"Billy?" Sirianna had a hold of Billy's hand and even if it was childish, some middle school shit, it felt nice so Billy hadn't pulled free. She squeezed his fingers and he knew she was about to pop their bubble. "Is there anything I can do?" she asked.

Of all the shit Billy thought she might say, that one wasn't so bad.

"Nah." Billy kept his cool, didn't start a fight over nothing. If he wanted a fight, he could find one. He didn't want one with her. "It's fine."

It was fine, Billy was fine, it was all fine. Sixteen more months and Billy was out of there.

Sirianna squeezed Billy's hand again, just something soft that managed to cut through him anyway.

"When it stops being fine, you can tell me," she said.

Billy smiled faintly because hadn't he said that? Almost exactly those words to Harry the day before? Did Harry tell her or were they just riding the same wave? Billy liked to think that Harry didn't say a word, that Billy just finally met someone who got it.

"Sure," he said, knowing it would keep being fine and he would deal with it the same way he always had. It wasn't so bad, not with days like that one.