Even Stranger Things

Sirianna felt the best that she had in a while on Saturday morning. She slept great, her hair still looked good, and she had plans with a friend.

A friend.

Sirianna hadn't had a friend in so long, she was almost nervous about it. Chrissy was nice, friendly and funny, what if Sirianna was a bore? A total bore who didn't know anything about anything and it made Chrissy hate her?

She would tell her friends, her real friends, about how weird Sirianna was and then nobody would ever want to be her friend again.

"The fuck are you doing, kid?"

Sirianna yelped and when she jumped she splattered some of the batter she had been stirring on herself.

"Sorry! I'm sorry!" Sirianna lunged for a rag to start cleaning the mess while Chief Hopper stood in the doorway of the kitchen, staring her down unnervingly. Sirianna avoided his eyes and sent a furtive look to the bedroom door, listening hard for any sign of Harry waking.

Her poor brother had been exhausted, it made Sirianna feel terrible. Not just in her chest, a slow ache of Harry's pains, but she felt guilty too. Harry forgot to eat and he didn't sleep well and it was Sirianna's job to make sure he did all those things.

Harry had crashed hard, he hadn't made a peep all night. Sirianna was relieved she woke up before him, she wanted to surprise him with a good breakfast. She didn't actually realize that Chief Hopper was home… should she - should she have asked before cooking?

"I wanted to make breakfast," Sirianna said quietly, turning just enough so she could see Chief Hopper from the edge of her vision. "Is that - you - I'm sorry."

Sirianna didn't know what to say, she didn't know how to speak to Chief Hopper. He carried a gun. Sirianna knew she could be grateful that he was letting her and Harry stay in his house, but she didn't know why he was allowing it.

Benny was unique, Sirianna was sure of that. Benny had been a pure heart and he had been kind.

Chief Hopper didn't seem to have any interest in Sirianna or Harry. Which was fine, Sirianna didn't mind that. But then why were they there?

"You'll burn it." Chief Hopper walked to the stove and Sirianna shifted away, turned to keep an eye on him. He turned the knob down, that was all, before he leaned on the counter away from her, just watching.

"Pancakes?" he asked.

"There was a box in the cabinet," Sirianna explained, feeling defensive. "I didn't know if we could use it. I'll - I can replace it."

Sirianna didn't know how, not yet. There used to be a vault full of money that their parents left behind for them, if Sirianna could find a way to get their money, without anyone being alerted by it… they could be fine.

They could get their own house and Sirianna would fill it with food and comfy places for Harry to sleep. They would have books and clothes and Sirianna would make sure Harry could block every doorway every night.

"I could not care less," Chief Hopper said, interrupting Sirianna's thoughts on how she could get to the vault she shared with Harry. "It's pancakes, Siri."

"Sirianna," she corrected him immediately. Harry could call her Siri, that was it.

"Okay, it's pancakes, Sirianna," Chief Hopper said, sounding almost as if he were mocking her. "I think you might have made too much batter though, it's a lot for one person."

"I…" Sirianna started to speak, but the explanation caught in her throat. She had planned enough for two people —Harry and Sirianna — but it was Chief Hopper's house, and it was his food. She held back the truth, tried to stay polite.

"It's for three people," she finally corrected, her voice steady but her heart racing.

Chief Hopper's voice held a small hint of amusement. "As much as I appreciate the enthusiasm, your brother isn't here. Unless he somehow snuck back in after I went to sleep."

"What?!" Sirianna yelped, almost sure that it was a joke - except it would be a terrible joke.

Sirianna's hand trembled, the spoon slipping from her fingers into the batter with a dull splat. Panic ignited in her chest, and she spun around, the room blurring as she bolted to the bedroom. Harry was asleep - he had to be. He was safe, calm, resting; Sirianna could feel his peace. She clung to that certainty as she tore down the hallway, each step a frantic beat in her chest.

When she threw open the door, all of her certainty shattered. Her pulse hammered in her ears as her eyes locked on the bed. The perfectly made bed.

No. No, no, no.

Harry should have been there, his peaceful body buried in the blankets. He always made the bed, it wasn't even proof if he had been in the bed or not, but he should be in it - he was supposed to be in it.

"WHY WOULDN'T YOU TELL ME HE'S GONE?!" The scream ripped from Sirianna's throat, raw and desperate. She didn't need to check the closets, didn't need to look under the bed - Harry wouldn't hide from her. He wouldn't leave without her. He wouldn't.

They stayed together. They always stayed together.

Chief Hopper had followed her, though he stayed far enough away in another stupid doorway with an idiotic look on his face.

"He's fifteen, it was a Friday night. He'll be back."

Chief Hopper was truly the stupidest man to ever exist. How he managed to breathe and walk at the same time was a true mystery.

"You thought HARRY would sneak out because he's fifteen and it's Friday?" Sirianna scoffed loudly, she didn't care if Chief Hopper swung his fists at her, she was furious. Harry could be hurt, scared.

Merlin, he could be gone. Gone.

Sirianna's hands shook when she pulled on her shoes. Harry could be gone, the White Coats could have them - he could be dead a million different ways, that could be the peace that Sirianna mistook for sleeping.

If Harry died would Sirianna have to feel his peace for the rest of her life? It wasn't a gift, it was a curse.

Gone. He was gone.

"He'll be back," Chief Hopper said, speaking to Sirianna's back as she made herself take long strides to the door - she had to find Harry. "Kids come home when they're ready."

Harry didn't have a home, they never had.

"Yeah?" Sirianna paused long enough to glower at Chief Hopper - to promise him pain and misery if her brother was hurt at all. "Tell that to Jonathan Byers."

What if all she had were a mere fifteen years? What if fifteen years was all the time she had and she didn't know it? Fifteen years, at least five she didn't remember, another five that were spotty with only important memories standing out. Nearly two years of shared laughter, smiles, joy. A little over three years of tears and pain and fear.

Fifteen years.

And Sirianna had been worried about making friends.

The ache in her stomach twisted, raw and pained. Sirianna doubled over on the sidewalk, retching until her stomach was empty and her body trembled. Tears blurred her vision and she wiped them away impatiently when she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. There wasn't time to breakdown, she had to find Harry.

Harry.

How was she meant to find Harry?

Sirianna walked blindly, focused more on what she could feel than what she could see. Harry could be gone, Sirianna didn't know that she would know. It was different, when he wasn't actively in pain Sirianna felt nothing. When he was tired or aching, Sirianna felt herself dragging, other than that…

Sirianna couldn't feel anything and it scared her.

There were an infinite number of places where Harry could be, Sirianna couldn't feel anything from him, and Chief Hopper was a miserable and stupid man.

When they first made the connection - when they tied Sirianna to her brother more than anyone had ever been connected before - Sirianna wanted to die.

Surely dying would be better than spending her days screaming until she was unconscious, then yanked back to consciousness by a new wave of torment.

How did Harry stand it? How could Harry lay on the floor in his cell across from Sirianna and only stare with blank eyes at the ceiling? Wasn't he twice as pained as Sirianna?

"Why aren't you crying?" Sirianna whispered to him. She wiped her own face and felt pitifully weak, useless, broken.

Harry didn't blink, he didn't want to move, Sirianna could see it.

"Because they want me to," he said flatly, still ripping Sirianna's body apart with his pain.

They tested it in reverse - tortured Sirianna to see if Harry could feel it. Sirianna tried to be as strong as Harry, she failed.

Harry cried though, when they were rewarded with sleeping in the same cell. Harry curled up beside Sirianna's still twitching body and she felt his tears drip on her.

It was the last time Sirianna saw him cry; never once did he cry for himself.

Sirianna needed to think - think, think, think. If Harry wasn't taken by the White Coats, if he did sneak away for some reason, where would he go? What would make Harry want to leave the house by himself?

Sirianna had to work on the assumption that Harry left the house by his own choice because she would never find him otherwise. If the White Coats found them - if they killed Benny, if they took Harry - then Sirianna would never find him.

If Harry left on his own, Sirianna might find him. It might even be a good thing, maybe Harry wanted to go for a walk. It didn't seem likely… but Sirianna couldn't move, breathe, think if she didn't tell herself that Harry went for a walk and lost track of time.

There was a park, not far from where Chief Hopper lived. There were a few kids playing, small and sweet with their winter caps on to fight the November chill. Harry wasn't there, Sirianna should have known he wouldn't be.

Sirianna found the path that led from the park to the quarry, a sort of river made with rocks. Sirianna didn't understand the thrill of it, the Black Lake had been beautiful - the quarry wasn't anything special.

What if Harry wasn't there? What if he was gone? Why - how did everything happen so quickly? Who would care, outside of Sirianna? Who would know that Harry was gone and he shouldn't be?

Who would remember Harry except for Sirianna? Who knew him?

Sirianna tripped on the loose gravel, fell and scraped her palm. She looked at her hand - her blood, the same as Harry's - and felt herself cracking down the center, spilling tears faster than blood could pour.

Was Harry bleeding? Would she know? Had something horrible happened when she went to sleep and Harry had died?

Sirianna couldn't - she couldn't live without Harry. For seven minutes she had, there were seven minutes where Sirianna had lived apart from Harry and she was sure that she had screamed the entire time.

"Sirianna?"

Sirianna was useless, absolutely useless. Harry was missing, gone. And what was she doing? Stupidly crying about it!

"Sirianna?"

Someone crouched down in front of her and Sirianna couldn't see through her blurry eyes but she knew it wasn't Harry, she knew it wasn't the one person she needed the most.

"Harry's gone," Sirianna wailed, hating that she couldn't find him, didn't somehow know where he might be. If Sirianna were the one missing, she knew Harry would find her immediately. Harry was the one with the magical strength, Harry was the one who didn't waste time or energy with crying. And Harry was gone.

"Baby bird flew the coop?"

Only one person would hear Harry was missing and still take a moment to insult him. Sirianna rubbed her face off with her shoulder and yanked her hand to her chest when surprisingly gentle hands tried to touch her.

"Harry is not a baby," Sirianna snapped, the stuffiness of her nose somehow dampening her anger. She glowered darkly at Billy, Billy who was knelt down in front of her, appearing out of nowhere.

Or maybe not nowhere - Sirianna looked around and saw that she must have slid the rest of the way down to the quarry. Billy's blue car - gorgeous and loud and fast - was parked on the opposite bank, Sirianna could hear the music from where she was.

"He's missing though?" Billy asked. His palm was still stretched out, Sirianna could touch his hand if she wanted.

But it wasn't Billy whose hand she needed, not then. Not until she knew where Harry was.

"Chief Hopper said he snuck out," Sirianna explained, trying to get through it without bawling uselessly. "I don't think he did though, Billy. Harry wouldn't. Where would he go??"

"Alright, talk me through it," Billy said. He reached slowly for Sirianna's hand even while he rolled his eyes at her. "And give me your fucking hand, doll. You're bleeding."

Sirianna wished Harry wasn't missing - gone - gone. She wished she could appreciate Billy Hargrove carefully picking little pieces of gravel out of the palm of her hand. She couldn't though, she couldn't even worry about what Billy was doing as she rushed out an explanation.

"— and then he said ‘oh he'll come home when he's hungry' but he won't, Billy, I know he won't! Harry doesn't even know when he's hungry! And he wouldn't leave without me, I just know he wouldn't. I - I can't lose him, I can't. He's - we've been through everything together."

Billy was holding her hand, just lightly running his thumb over the back of her own hand. He had listened to everything Sirianna said and even if he was an arse sometimes, Sirianna had seen him be an arse to Steve and to his sister and then Steve again, Billy listened.

"You checked with Harrington or Byers yet?" Billy asked. When Sirianna shook her head, Billy raised her hand up and - and he pressed his lips to the scrape.

"C'mon, kitten, let's go find little bird. You can have shotgun."

There was a drop of Sirianna's blood on Billy's face, just on the edge of his lips. Sirianna should have told him, but… but she didn't. Sirianna let Billy help her up and then she followed him to his car, hating that she needed someone to help her find Harry.

Harry could find her on his own, if it were reversed.

"Where are you going?" Sirianna asked after she climbed in Billy's car. Billy's car was lovely, really. It was a beautiful sky blue on the outside, the inside was all dark leather that smelled like smoke and Billy. Billy drove with the windows down and the radio turned all the way up - filling the car with wind and music and speed. Merlin, Billy's car was fast.

And the backseat looked normal, Sirianna had checked.

"Figured we'd check with Stevie Wonder," Billy said. He shifted the driving stick thing, Sirianna heard gravel flying behind the spinning tires as Billy easily maneuvered the car up the small hill, breaking out between two trees that were just the right width for Billy's car.

"Steve? No, Harry wouldn't be there," Sirianna said. She should have thought of Jonathan first, he was Harry's friend. Harry liked Jonathan, he was Harry's first friend in Hawkins, maybe his best friend outside of Sirianna. "Jonathan," she decided firmly. "Do you know where he lives?"

"Hick town like this?" Billy spun the wheel hard, put the car on the road just in time for the tires to squeal against the pavement. "Everyone knows where everyone lives."

If everyone knew where everyone lived then someone had to know where Harry was. Someone, one person, had to know where Harry was.

Sirianna just hoped it would be someone rather than Harry.

Jonathan's car was parked in the drive of a little white house and Sirianna threw the car door open before Billy even parked.

"Easy, don't break my car," Billy complained, taking much too long to climb out.

Sirianna hardly listened to Billy's complaint, she was already running to the door, silently praying that Harry would be there. Billy caught up to her when Sirianna knocked and they only had a moment of pause before the house shook with a loud - THUD!

"What the fuck!"

Sirianna hardly had time to yelp before Billy turned and Sirianna was blocked behind his body. There was another thud, another crash. Billy swore again and Sirianna could hardly see past Billy, past the dust and dirt that filled the air. When she did see what caused the noise - the third THUD - she couldn't understand it.

A part of the house had broken? No, not broken… Sirianna could see a sharp tool, an axe, sticking through the wall…

"Will?" A woman's voice broke and repeated Will's name as the most desperate plea. "Will… please, Will… please. WILL!"

"Mom? Jesus, Mom!"

The second voice was Jonathan and Sirianna felt terrible, she wasn't intentionally eavesdropping on a quite private moment, there was a giant hole in the wall that carried their conversation clearly outside.

"He's here, Jonathan," the woman, Jonathan's mum, it seemed, sobbed. She was sobbing because a piece of her heart was missing, outside of her sight and missing. "I know he is, he told me."

"Fucking crazy bitch…" Billy mumbled under his breath.

She did sound crazy, but so did Hagrid when he said that Sirianna and Harry were a witch and wizard. Hagrid proved he wasn't a mad man, maybe Jonathan's mum could too.

"Move please," Sirianna requested politely. Billy had her blocked in the corner, which - which Sirianna couldn't waste time thinking about because her brother was missing and there might be another boy stuck in a wall.

Billy muttered another curse under his breath before he moved, giving Sirianna access to the front door once again. She knocked firmly, her fingers crossed behind her back that Harry would be there.

"Just sit here, okay?" Jonathan said inside the house, breaking Sirianna's heart some. He sounded sad, scared, much older than he was. Jonathan must have been carrying the weight of his brother's disappearance, the weight of his mum's sanity, his father's indifference.

Jonathan looked as haggard as he sounded when he answered the door. He started to force a smile for Sirianna, then blinked at Billy beside her.

"It's, uh…" Jonathan's eyes flicked to the side, where there was a large hole in the side of his house. "Not a good time."

That was all he had to say and Sirianna knew - knew that her own brother wasn't there. Jonathan would have mentioned it, Harry would have walked with him to the door. There weren't any noises inside the house except for Jonathan's mum's heartbroken cries.

She still had to ask, had to be sure. Because as horrible as it was that Will was missing - and Sirianna wanted to know more about if he was inside a wall - she couldn't do anything until Harry was safe.

"Have you seen Harry?" Sirianna asked.

"Harry?" Jonathan's eyebrows furrowed down and he shook his head. "No. Is he missing?"

"We don't know yet," Billy said, drawling the words lazily.

Sirianna gave Billy a sharp look because she did know. She knew that Harry was missing because she didn't know where he was.

"Let me grab my jacket, I'll come help look," Jonathan offered, not missing Sirianna's expression.

"No, stay here," Sirianna said. It was kind of Jonathan to offer, he was a kind person, but his brother was missing too and his mum needed Jonathan. If Sirianna and Billy didn't find Harry within the next hour then she would enlist every person she knew to help search for him. Until then…

Jonathan had too much on his shoulders and Harry was Sirianna's baby brother.

"Time to check out Harrington's," Billy said when they were in his car again. Sirianna nodded absently, knowing that Harry wouldn't be there. She stared at Jonathan on his porch and the curl of his shoulders, the bags beneath his eyes.

Siblings weren't meant to be separated, they weren't.

Parents could die and friends could leave, but a brother was meant to be forever.

Sirianna had only ever lived in a world without Harry for seven minutes.

Billy, bless him, drove too quickly for Sirianna to process properly. It was faster than her Nimbus could fly probably, not as fast as it needed to be. Harry once told Sirianna that time sometimes passed him by every time he blinked and Sirianna wanted that.

Blink - Harry would be in the backseat, frowning at the music that blared just right.

Blink - Harry would be safely with Sirianna, no longer missing, lost, or taken.

Sirianna blinked three times, looked in the backseat, Harry wasn't there.

"What if I don't find him?" Sirianna asked aloud, voicing the worst fear of her life, the worst question she had ever asked. What if Harry was gone forever?

Billy shifted the stick thing, the cat seemed to truly fly around a corner, and he reached over to put his hand on Sirianna's.

"Then we'll keep looking," he said, his voice steady.

Sirianna didn't mind Billy's hand on hers, not so much then. It wasn't the hand she needed, but it was a small warmth.

‘We'll', he said. We.

Steve's house was nice, very nice. Sirianna had seen it in the dark before and thought it was rather posh, but seeing it in the daylight confirmed it for her. The house was huge with glass walls that reflected the sun and trees, the lawn pristine, everything was quiet.

"Why do you hate Steve?" Sirianna asked as Billy parked his car so close behind Steve's that they had to be touching. It seemed purposeful, judging from the smirk on Billy's face.

"Why not?" Billy asked.

"I…" Sirianna didn't have an answer. Steve had been rude to Sirianna and Harry, then seemed to be nice. Billy was rude to everyone, apparently, but hadn't been too unkind to Sirianna or Harry yet.

The mystery of Billy and Steve's animosity could wait, after Sirianna found her brother. After she could breathe again. After Harry was safe.

Billy turned the car off and the sudden silence was almost deafening. Sirianna had no hopes that Harry would be inside the house, she couldn't imagine why Billy thought Harry would be. Sirianna knew her brother, she knew him better than she knew herself. It was a waste of time and Harry could be slipping further and further away, he could be gone.

The front door of Steve's house opened before Sirianna even reached the pretty little porch area. Steve didn't say hello, he didn't ask why Sirianna and Billy were there, he —

"Harry's still asleep."

Sirianna could only gawk at Steve, his words hanging between them. The relief that rushed her was staggering, it made her want to fall to her knees and sob that her brother was safe, asleep, not gone.

But there was a sharp edge slicing through her chest, an edge of betrayal. Harry didn't betray her, except he did. Harry left, he left her, and went to Steve's. To - what? To sleep? Could he not sleep where Sirianna was? Could he not leave a note as Sirianna had for him?

"I thought you were done."

Was he done with her? Did Harry think he was too grown, too powerful, too indifferent to everything to need Sirianna anymore?

Harry was asleep, uncaring that he put Sirianna through hell.

Sirianna stepped forward and Steve moved to the side immediately, letting her inside without meeting her eyes.

"I should have called," he mumbled.

He should have.

Steve led the way up a set of gleaming stairs, taking Sirianna toward her brother. The house was so quiet, almost eerie. Sirianna was only half-aware of Billy following her upstairs, it only made her think the entire thing would be a dream - a nightmare - if she could do things like that.

Harry was asleep, in Steve Harrington's house. Harry left her, left no note, terrified her… for what?

Sirianna didn't even know he would be there, didn't think Harry would willingly and freely leave her to go to someone else's house.

They reached a door at the top of the stairs and Steve nudged it open so Sirianna could peer inside and see the proof of what Steve said.

And there was proof. Harry was stretched out in a bed, only his black hair could be seen sticking out from beneath a navy blue comforter. It only took Sirianna a second to look at the walls, to see the basketball posters, for her to guess it was Steve's room.

Steve's bedroom or - or his little brother, maybe, who was curled up on the foot of the bed, just as soundly asleep as Harry.

Sirianna felt frozen - relieved, shocked, hurt.

"How could he?" she asked, too low to wake her brother or the child sleeping in the same bed as him. Harry's chest rose and fell beneath the blanket, his body was still - it was peace that Sirianna felt. Harry was peaceful in his sleep.

"I should have called you," Steve murmured again, clearly concerned that he would wake up his bestest friend in the world. He tried to shut the door and Billy snaked a hand out to force it open, but Sirianna stepped back with a shake of her head.

Sirianna didn't even know him, her own brother. Billy had recommended they go to Steve's, Sirianna had no hope at all that her brother would actually be there.

It was too much, too much after a morning that had been too much.

Sirianna turned on her heel and started taking the stairs two at a time, desperate to get out of Steve Harrington's house.

"Why do you hate Steve?"

"Why not?"

Why not? Why not hate Steve and be furious at Harry and hate that he left her and let her sink down in terror and fear and misery while he slept through it all?

"Sirianna! Wait!" Steve called after her, but Sirianna didn't want to hear it. She didn't want to hear a damn thing from Steve, none of it would matter when the person she wanted to hear from was sleeping.

There was nothing that could get between Sirianna and Harry, ever. Not the cruelness and inequality of their relatives and their punishments. Not their different houses at Hogwarts or different friend groups. Their opposition in quidditch and the House Cup didn't come between them. The years in captivity and torture had brought them as close as two people could possibly be. And yet Sirianna didn't know her brother at all.

Sirianna had only lived in a world without her brother for seven minutes - maybe she cried the whole time while Harry slept and had to be forced out in the world to join her.