The night was very cold.
Sirius shivered as the night wind blew in from the ventilation holes of his dark room. He rolled over seeking warmth from the body that usually slept beside him.
But it was empty.
He reluctantly opened one eye to peer. There was no one there.
He rolled onto his back and opened his eyes wide.
He sighed. “He’s doing this again,” he whispered.
Trying to beat his sleepiness, Sirius hurriedly got up and got out of bed.
He was walking towards the bathroom when he saw the room light switch on.
“Sev?”
The person he called wasn’t there.
Then he stepped back outside. Descending each step slowly, trying not to make any noise that would disturb ‘Sev’ who might be daydreaming in the kitchen.
When he reached the kitchen door, he saw him there. Sitting dreamily with a cup of tea that was probably no longer hot.
“Severus,” he called softly.
The person summoned turned his head slowly, looking at him in confusion. “You’re awake? Did I wake you up?”
Sirius replied with a sigh and then shook his head. This was already the third time he caught Severus quietly leaving the bed and daydreaming in the kitchen. If this continues, Severus’s health will suffer.
“Let’s go back to bed, darlin’.”
Severus looked at him with his tired eyes. “My tea isn’t finished yet.”
“Your tea may not taste good anymore. It must have cooled down. Leave it, go back to sleep.”
“But…”
Sirius sighed again. He walked towards Severus who was still silent in his chair, then pulled out the chair next to him and sat facing his lover.
“Still thinking about it?” he asked.
Severus looked back at him. Sirius could see that his eyes were red from lack of sleep and the circles under his eyes were getting darker by the day.
“What are you worried about? Didn’t I say we’ll get through this together.”
“What if I fail again this time?” Severus asked.
Sirius shook his head. “Ssh. Don’t think like that, okay? Everything will be fine, Sev. Trust me. You have me by your side, remember?”
Severus was still silent. He rested his hand on his growing belly.
“We’ve lost them before. I don’t want to lose again this time.”
“No, we won’t.”
Sirius’s hand joined Severus’ hand on his stomach. Stroking the round belly where their child lived.
It’s still a little overwhelming for him. After years of struggling and going through several losses. They were finally going to have a child.
He remembered Poppy’s words that an omega pregnancy in old age was indeed very risky. Moreover, Severus had experienced several miscarriages. Even Severus himself wasn’t so sure he could get pregnant again. But it seemed like fate was on their side this time.
And Severus’s habit of always losing sleep and letting negative thoughts consume him really needs to stop. It won’t be good for his health and the baby’s.
“You really need to rest, dear.”
“I really can’t sleep.”
“You can’t or you don’t want to, hm?”
Severus clucked in annoyance, glancing sharply at Sirius. “I can’t!”
“At least you should try, baby. Please let’s go back to sleep.”
Sirius grabbed Severus’s hand, pulling him to his feet.
“Let’s sleep, baby. You know I can’t sleep without hugging you,” he said as he put his hand on Severus’ waist, helping him to walk back to their bedroom.
“We’re going to have a baby soon, so stop calling me that!”
Sirius chuckled. “Yes, my love.”
“You should stop being spoilt with me because after this baby born, they’re the only ones I’ll spoil.”
“Aw, you’re so mean to me.”
Severus stopped walking. He looked at Sirius with a frown.
“You’re stupid Gryffindor who always annoys me! I’m not mean. You just deserve it!”
Sirius just grinned. Sometimes he was still amazed at how Severus’s mood changed drastically over the course of a few minutes.
“Alright, my love.”
“You should also cuddle me less when I sleep. It makes me hot,” Severus continued.
“Okay, love.” Sirius couldn’t promise on this one.
“You also—”
“Love, leave this conversation for later okay? Let’s get some sleep.”
Severus narrowed his eyes. “You’re really annoying, you know?”
Sirius chuckled again. “Yes. I know it, love.”