What is the right choice?
SS
Three days into Hades stay at Spinner’s End, Severus had finally got him to eat in between meals. At least he found out during lunch, that he had made some snacks. The way he said it, told Severus he was asking for permission, which Severus easily gave, especially because it was some kind of spring roll, instead of fried it was cooked in a water bath.
With the aid of the potions Severus had had in store as well as the fresh ones he had prepared. The child was visible getting healthier. It was still a long time before he would be healed, even longer because he would go back to his abusers.
Not yet though. Now Severus and Hades were in his potion lab. It had the perfect size for one person. The ingredients and equipment were partly in storage, partly in shelves attached to the wall.
Still, Severus found a stool and made space, to let the boy help. His abilities in the kitchen showed, that he was more than capable with a knife, and Severus had some pairs of dragonhide gloves, which students left in his classroom, when they outgrew them or just forgot them and never asked him. Sometimes students were truly irritating, he did know he wasn’t anyone’s favourite professor. Merlin, he had never been anyone’s favourite, even Lily had chosen others over him, as soon as she had the choice. But leaving something as expensive as dragonhide gloves, and never even try asking.
Well, at least it left him with a box full of gloves in different sizes. He let Hades choose whichever he would like. “You can have every single one, I truly couldn’t care less. Yes, even if they are three sizes too big. Transfiguration had never been my best subject, but as I managed an E in my NEWTs, I should be more than capable to make them fit.” And Hades had chosen 2 pairs. One an already small one with snakes on the backhand, which had still been too big for his small hands. And a second in navy blue one with golden stiches to write the words ‘Puddlemere United’, which was the size of an adult hand, which Severus let the child charm smaller himself after going through the wand waving and spell word aptus modus. Severus had let him use his wand, he hadn’t lived a day without his wand on him in its holster. And he hadn’t been sure the wand would even work for the child. But seeing the glow in the boy’s eyes, when he held Severus wand and it wasn’t snatched out of his hand was worth all the discomfort in being wandless for the first time in almost a decade.
After the fourth try the boy managed the transfiguration, not the correct size, but still obviously smaller than before. The childlike laugh, that was suppressed almost instantly but turned into a full smile when Severus praised him, was a moment Severus would treasure.
So, here they were now. Severus carefully stirring the caldron and Hades next to him, crushing and preparing the mistletoe berries which would need to be added later. They’re brewing a salve for infection. The recipe Severus had chosen, wasn’t as potent as he would’ve liked, but it was the long-lasting one and hopefully the child would never need it.
Once the colour changed to a viper green, Severus stopped stirring.
“Look here boy, that’s when you need to stop stirring.”
Severus stepped a bit to the side, so the child could investigate the cauldron. But he didn’t move. His body was tense, and he made himself as small as possible. He had stopped crushing the berries. “Are you alright?” Severus askes, a stupid question, as it was clear the boy wasn’t.
* H *
It had started with a pair of gloves. He was allowed to pick for himself. He needed to choose one, which was inacceptable condition, whatever that meant. Mr. Snape, who had allowed him to call him Severus. Had assured Harry, there wasn’t a wrong choice. Even if Harry should pick a pair with a hole in it, he wouldn’t be punished, and he was even allowed to keep the pair anyway. It just was very important, that he picked at least one pair functional pair. But he could take as many as he would like.
Harry admitted to himself, that he was overwhelmed with the choice. He had never had a choice. Sure, he had bought a cloat, like his sister. But even though he had the choice, it wasn’t a choice at all. He chooses the same material as her, and she had sent a coded letter with Scar, to ensure Hades was allowed to get some of her hair for the stiches. She had said it was so that even though he had insisted (with good reason) on keeping the cloat the dirty colour, it would still look expensive on the magical side. And therefore, he wouldn’t look like a homeless.
But he had never had to make a choice, without someone having made a similar choice before. Therefore, he wasn’t sure what the right choice would be. Should he take the pair of gloves, which looked to be the most worn, but didn’t have any wholes? Should he pick a pair with wholes, and then pick another one? How many pairs did he need to pick? Was he supposed to pick a big pair? Or should he go for something small?
The biggest problem Harry realise was, that Ares was currently busy and couldn’t help him with the choice. She was being moved, a new place tended to need lots of attention for her, so she wouldn’t stumble or hit into something. She also never knew if someone would try to touch her, even though she made sure the people knew about that quirk of her immediately. And because she didn’t want to be touched, it was more difficult for her to ensure the guardian was safe enough.
He was on his own. With a box full of gloves before him. He had started to dig into it. Just to keep the impression of looking through the gloves. Carefully he pulled one out, just so he had a better view of Mr. Sna- Severus. And he let out the air he had not realise he had been holding in. Just to stop breathing again and worry about him being in trouble for the noise.
Severus continued to read the book he had picked up though, not even glancing at him. Slowly Harry continued breathing, making sure to be as quite as possible.
Focusing on breathing, helped him calm his thoughts and helped him to look at the problem rational. Severus had given him a box full of gloves, which didn’t look to be for fashion. Yes, there were gloves who looked fashionable, with decorations on them like what Veronica made on his cloat. But the thickness and material didn’t say deco. It said work. And if those gloves were made for work and Severus had collected them as lost property, then they were most likely for potion work.
Did that mean Severus wanted to teach him about potions? He had picked a schoolbook on potions from the shelf, when Harry had been looking for a new one to read yesterday. And he had told Harry he could asked any questions he had. And when he hadn’t understood what difference, it made if it was sliced or diced, Ares had encouraged him to ask. She had said “Just ask him. Trust me Hades, he’s a professor. He might be strict, but he did become a teacher for a reason. So just ask. He is an honourable person. He’ll keep his word.”
Of course, there had been a lot of words from him in between, but in the end, Ares had reminded him of the promise Mr. Snape – no, Severus had given him about letting him leave whenever he wanted. A promise, Ares was sure he would keep, no matter how much of a freak Harry was.
So, if he had said he could pick whichever pair he wanted. And Ares had said, Severus kept his word. Then that meant, he could pick whichever pair he would like.
Whatever pairs he would like. Severus had said he could pick more than one.
In the end Harry decided to take green one with snakes on it, because it was the smallest one without any holes in it. And he picked a blue one, because blue was his favourite colour. The golden words helped as well. He didn’t know why Puddlemere. But united, that was something he would always hope for. He and his sister united, without fear of her being hurt or them having to separate again. A dream, for when he was finally old enough to leave his relative for ever. United.