Chapter 10
Lily Luna Potter considered herself someone who could find a solution to any problem, but this time, she was lost. She didn't know what to do or how to do it, and she didn't fully understand the problem they were facing. She also didn’t want to meddle this time.
"LILY, DID YOU HEAR ME?" Hugo was shaking his cousin and best friend.
"HUGO, I HEARD YOU. I just got out of class, give me a break. Not all of us are doing well enough to leave class early," Lily's mind was blank; after a Divination class, she wasn't in the mood to think.
"Lily, please," Hugo begged, while Louis listened silently.
"Hugo, it's your sister," Lily knew this was something her friend had to deal with on his own.
"I know, but she's your best friend."
"No, Hugo." Lily started walking away.
"Please, I promise I'll talk to her, but could you...?" Lily rolled her eyes and turned around.
"Alright, Hugo, but never again." Hugo hugged his cousin.
"Thanks, I owe you one."
"Oh, and a big one. Let's go." Lily began walking quickly to where her cousin said his sister was, followed by Louis and Hugo. She wanted to get this over with quickly so she could be alone for a while.
"Sorry, Lily, I didn’t see you." Teddy had bumped into Lily.
"No worries, Teddy." Teddy noticed that Lily was with Hugo and Louis, and saw that they were all in a hurry to leave.
"What are you three up to?" Lily realized that her brother/friend wanted to tease them, but she wasn't in the mood for that.
"Nothing." The three of them shook their heads at the same time, none of them were in the mood or wanted to explain, so they continued walking quickly.
They arrived at the Astronomy Tower and entered. There they were—Rose, Ron, and Hermione.
"You're here, Hugo," his father greeted him.
"Yeah, Dad." Hugo and Rose were shooting daggers at each other.
"What happened between you two?" Hermione asked, noticing the looks they were exchanging.
"Nothing, nothing," Rose replied without stopping her glare at Hugo.
"Rose, can we talk for a second?" Lily saw that Rose wanted to talk right there in front of everyone, so she added, "In private." Rose got up.
"I’ll be right back," she said to her parents and left the Astronomy room with Lily. From outside, they could hear the awkward conversation between Louis and Hugo, and Hermione and Ron, who wanted to know what was going on with the girls.
"What’s going on, Lily?" Rose asked.
"Don’t make this harder," Lily and Rose whispered. "Don't say anything."
"You knew?" Rose nodded. "I’m his sister; why didn’t he tell me?" Rose spoke with an indignant tone.
"I don’t know, he only told me yesterday. They asked me for help to tell everyone," Lily tried to calm her cousin down.
"I’m his sister, Lily. We always tell each other everything."
"Rose, that's something you need to talk to Hugo about. I just ask that you don’t tell anyone. Let them be ready to tell people on their own." Rose nodded.
"I would never."
"Good, if anyone asks, we talked about girl stuff. I asked you for girl advice; that always keeps Uncle Ron from asking too many questions." Rose nodded, and both of them re-entered the room.
"Can we know what you two talked about? These two refused to tell us," Hermione asked, laughing.
"I asked for girl advice," Lily replied simply. Rose gave her brother a kind look, which he returned.
"You're not pregnant, are you?" Ron asked, eyes wide.
"No, Uncle, no, that would be scientifically impossible." Ron relaxed his expression. "Come on, Louis, let's leave the family to catch up." Louis got up, and the two of them left.
Lily said goodbye to her cousin Louis and headed to the Gryffindor common room, where she found her mother.
"Hi, Lily," Ginny greeted her. Lily rolled her eyes in frustration, making sure Ginny didn’t see. She wanted—no, needed—to be alone.
"Hi, Mom." She sat beside her, forcing a smile and pretending to be in good spirits.
"How's it going?" Ginny asked cheerfully.
"Okay, I guess," she replied.
"Rough day?" Ginny inquired.
"A bit," Lily answered honestly, resting her defeated head on her mother’s lap.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Ginny offered.
"No, it's fine. I'm just tired," Lily lied.
"I get it. Go get some rest, and we’ll talk later." Lily looked at her mother in surprise.
"How did you know?" Ginny rolled her eyes, laughing.
"No one beats the queen of pretending everything’s fine, and 'I'm just tired' is the most obvious tool for 'I'm fed up with everything and everyone, and I want to strangle someone.'" Lily laughed; she loved her mother so much, her personality hadn't changed much over time.
"Well then, 'I’m just tired,' I’m going to sleep." They both laughed as Lily climbed the stairs to the girls' dormitory.
Halfway up, she realized she didn’t know which room was hers. She went back down, checked the room assignments, and then headed back up. She was sharing a room with two girls named Lisa and Emma, as well as Rose.
When she entered her room, she was surprised to find a Hogwarts uniform and some notebooks and scrolls. Attached was a note: "Lily Luna Potter, we noticed you didn’t have a uniform or school supplies with you, so we’ve provided these for you to use during your stay in the past. Remember, you must complete all assignments and exams given during your stay."
Lily groaned after reading that last part and stored her things in a drawer. She lay down on her bed, staring at the ceiling, trying to sleep but couldn’t.
She decided to work on her Divination homework and was taking her notebooks out of the drawer when two girls entered the room.
"I’m telling you, it doesn’t make sense…" They stopped talking when they noticed Lily.
"Hi, I’m Lily. And you are?" Lily greeted them kindly, even though she didn’t have the energy to be polite.
"Hi… hi, I’m Emma," said a girl with straight black hair, green eyes, delicate features, and pale skin.
"Hi, I’m Lisa," the other girl with straight blonde hair, green eyes, and even paler skin than the first one greeted.
"You two look a lot alike, or is it just me?" The girls laughed.
"We’re twins. We dye our hair to tell each other apart," Lisa explained.
"Dyeing is a Muggle invention to change a person’s hair color. Our parents are Muggles, so we know what it is," Emma finished explaining.
"Cool," Lily replied. "I have to go do an assignment, but it was nice meeting you." Lily tried to leave again.
"Do you have to do assignments anyway?" Emma asked, earning a nudge from Lisa.
"Yeah, orders from Dumbledore." Lily thought for a second and added, "I can answer anything you want tonight, but I really need to go now." She didn’t really need to leave, but she needed to be alone. The sisters nodded.
Lily was walking through the corridors of Hogwarts when she bumped into someone.
"Sorry, it wasn’t my inten..." the boy began.
"Is today 'bother and bump into Lily' day?" Lily said as she got up from the floor. Who had bumped into her now? "Oh," she realized who it was—it was her boyfriend. She noticed he looked sad. "Sorry, Lys, I didn’t know it was you." Lysander helped her pick up the books that had fallen.
"It’s okay, Lil's. What’s got you in this mood?" Lily adjusted her hair.
"Nothing, nothing, it just seems like everyone’s bumping into me today." Lysander wrapped his arms around her shoulders.
"If you say so. Let me know if you need anything, okay?" Lily nodded, then remembered the sad look on her boyfriend’s face a moment ago.
"And why the sad face?" Lysander took a few seconds to respond.
"Nothing, just memories." Lily knew he was lying, but she also knew he would tell her when he was ready. There were certain things he didn’t tell her—they were "TOPIC Z"—and she understood.
"Okay, just tell me if you need anything." Lily tenderly caressed his hand and prepared to leave. "I have to go, I need to do some work in the library." She didn’t want to lie to him, but she really needed to be alone. She loved being around people, but she also needed time for herself to avoid exploding, and right then, she was on the verge of it.
"Lily, the library isn't in the dungeons," Lysander said as Lily looked around, confused.
"Lys, we're in the hallway near the Great Hall," she replied. Lysander looked around, surprised—how had he ended up there? "I can see you’ve got something on your mind. When you're ready to talk, you know where to find me." Lily hugged him goodbye and walked away.
She reached the library quickly and found the most secluded, hidden table. She pulled out her books and homework, starting to read. The topic seemed familiar, but she couldn't quite remember it.
She opened her books to the chapter they needed to reference for their assignment, and suddenly it all came back to her. They had covered this material at the beginning of her third year.
Within minutes, she finished the assignment but didn’t want to leave the library. It was so peaceful there, and no one was bothering her. She decided to stay.
As she sat there, her thoughts drifted to all the things her parents and uncles had gone through during their years at Hogwarts. She wondered how they hadn’t exploded under the pressure.
She was lost in her thoughts—exactly what she needed—when she heard someone calling her. Who could it be now?
"Hi, Lily." She recognized her boyfriend’s voice and felt a wave of happiness. She didn’t mind being with him at all. Then she remembered how sad he had seemed earlier.
"Hi, Lys. Ready to talk?" Lysander nodded. Lily stood up and quickly packed her things with a flick of her wand.
They headed to the lake and sat under one of the trees in the most secluded area away from the castle. This was their spot.
They sat there for hours, during which Lysander shared with Lily one of his "TOPIC Z" issues, and she listened attentively.
When Lysander finished telling Lily everything, she had tears in her eyes. She couldn’t control them. She wanted so badly to be strong, but she couldn't. She couldn’t hear that her boyfriend, one of the people she loved most in the world and one of her best friends, had wanted to take his own life without crying.
Lily promised herself that she would never leave him alone. She would always be by his side and help him through everything.
They talked a bit more, but this time it was Lily’s turn to speak. She didn’t say much; she couldn’t—it wasn’t her secret to share.
Eventually, they decided it was time to go to the Great Hall. They did, and each went to their respective house tables. Lily sat next to Rose, who had saved her a seat.
"Lily, are you okay?" Rose asked, concerned.
"Yeah, why?" Lily responded, trying to sound natural but lying a bit.
"Your eyes are red and puffy, and your face is wet," Rose pointed out. Lily touched her face and realized it was indeed a bit damp. Had she been crying? She couldn’t believe she was crying again. She never cried, especially not twice over the same thing. She was supposed to be strong, but how could she not cry when what she had heard just hours ago still left a hollow feeling in her chest?
"I’m fine, Rose, don’t worry," Lily lied, sitting next to her cousin and noticing Emma and Lisa. "Hey, girls, I didn’t see you there," she greeted the twins, who returned the greeting. "How about we have a Q&A night tonight?" Lily suggested.
"SOUNDS GREAT!" Emma shouted, making Lisa laugh.
"Sounds perfect, but we won’t be the only ones getting interrogated—you two aren’t off the hook," Rose added.
"This is going to be fun," Emma said excitedly, taking a bite of bread.
"I could use some fun," Lily whispered to herself. No one heard her.