"I'm breaking up with you" Regulus said, very bluntly.
James sighed so hard it could almost be identified as a groan "Again?"
James liked Regulus a lot. He liked to think Regulus also sort of tolerated him, because that would explain the relationship they had been keeping for the past 6 months. It had been a little difficult at first, seeing as dating your best friends little brother usually posed some difficulties for the relationship, with secret keeping and all that. Yeah, they would have still needed to sneak around even if they had told Sirius, but it would still be a lot easier if he just knew.
But, well, they adjusted pretty quickly. Nowadays, James spent almost every evening in either the astronomy tower or hidden away behind the quidditch stands just to meet Regulus in private. They did sometimes talk in public as well, occasionally even taking it as far as to engage in a bit of smalltalk when Sirius was around, yet James still cherished the few lone hours he was able to get with Regulus.
And, yeah, a good amount of them were spent snogging, but they did other stuff as well. Mostly, James and Regulus just talked about whatever seemed to wander their mind at the moment. James was pretty sure he was the one person that knew Regulus best (apart from maybe Pandora), and honestly, that was an accomplishment he was proud of. They also played friendly quidditch games with each other from time to time, mostly because they couldn't and wouldn't ever even think about being anything other than dead serious when it came to actual games between gryffindor and slytherin. Yeah, no, James was getting that quidditch cup, even if it meant having to shove his boyfriend off a broom for it.
(That actually had happened before on accident and Regulus had managed to give him the silent treatment for a whole three hours before caving in and bickering with James until they both forgot about it)
They also read, a lot. Or, Regulus read while James did literally everything other than reading. By now he knew how many tiles the ceiling of the astronomy tower had, with how often he'd been forced to sit up there with no other fun activities to occupy him. He had tried reading with Regulus, but sometimes even Jane Austen couldn't keep him from growing distracted.
But, what they did best, was absolutely, relentlessly arguing. Bickering, fighting, disputing, quarrelling, squabbling, disagreeing, whatever you wanted to call it. They relished in that, as if it were their drug of choice. It was rarely ever about anything serious, just playful teasing about each others mistakes during a past quidditch game, or the way James wore his uniform, or the way Regulus had glared at him earlier over dinner. It was fun.
However, Regulus arcturus black, like the name already suggested, had a flair for the dramatics. It ran in the family.
So yes, James often found himself in a situation where his boyfriend, who he knew was kind of head over heels for him, broke up with him over something like his opinion on a poet and it was in James hands alone to make it up to him. Honestly, the black family would be the death of him.
"Yes James, again, and it might as well be final" Regulus hissed at James, who was currently sprawled in Regulus bed and spread over his lap, a position that very well suggested that the break up would, in fact, not be final.
"I just called Edgar Allan Poe overrated, you're so dramatic" James mumbled whilst curling into Regulus side, trying his best not to show the amusement spreading though his words.
"Dramatic? That man raised me more than my father ever did, you do not get to criticise him like that" Regulus scoffed, burying his hand into James hair which made James hum in approval. They were hanging around in the slytherin dorms, a fairly recent development for them that was made possible when Barty had accidentally let it slip that him and Evan already knew about their relationship, so there wasn't really a point in hiding it from them anymore. Big mistake on Barty's part, really, because now James definitely spend a good chunk of his time invading their space to get into discussions about poetry with Regulus.
"I don't care who raised you," James whispered furiously, "Jane Austen is still superior."
Regulus suddenly recoiled so hard that James practically flew off his lap. Offended, James looked up to glance at Regulus, who somehow looked even more affronted than James did. "Jane Austen? How can you even compare those two?" He sputtered, genuinely bewildered at the fact that James could ever even think of one on correlation to the other.
"What, not big on the romance?" James asked, and Regulus pulled a face. A different kind of man might've been offended that the guy he was on a date with basically just projectile vomited at the mention of romance, but fortunately James wasn't a different man. "Alright, more gothic then. What about Charlotte Brontë? Mary
Shelley?"
"Who taught you to only enjoy feminist poetry?" Regulus questioned.
James turned his head so that he could look directly into Regulus eyes and deadpanned "Who do you think?"
Regulus broke the eye contact by rolling his eyes and sighed "Lily," James nodded at that statement, "I can't even say I'm surprised, she's been pestering me to read the bell jar for the past three weeks"
"And," James asked, raising his eyebrows, "did you?"
Regulus pursed his lips and adverted his gaze before mumbling "obviously."
The confirmation made James grin, because he really liked seeing Lily and Regulus be friends. It had been a little awkward for Regulus at first, when Lily had accidentally walked in on them in the greenhouse because Regulus had forgotten that other prefects were also assigned gardening duty that day, but the awkwardness quickly faded when they found out that when combined, they could be James worst nightmare.
But, James was okay with them pestering him to the point of insanity if it meant that they got along.
"C'mere" James suddenly frowned, reaching out for Regulus because he suddenly realised that they were way too far apart for James liking. Honestly, why would he ever even let them put distance between them?
When James hands tried brushing Regulus tho, he just grabbed him by the wrist and firmly declared "Nope, still broken up with you."
James entire demeanour flipped a switch. How dare Regulus. Why did James have to pick the most entitled brat on the planet for a boyfriend? Something about 'you can take the boy out of the ancient and most noble house of black but you can't take the ancient and most noble house of black out of the boy'.
"I'm sorry?" sputtered Regulus and, oops, he might've said that last part out loud. Definitely not helping his case.
"Nothing" James smiled as innocently as he could. Regulus was not impressed with him.
"Yeah, sure" he scoffed.
"Fine then, but I still believe that there are poets superior to Poe, you want to know who?" James beamed, as an Idea made way into his head.
"Do enlighten me, please" Regulus smirked.
"Me, of course" James grinned, before clearing his throat and dramatically exclaiming "Roses are red, violets are blue, Poe isn't inferior at all, that title goes to you"
Regulus blinked at him for a split second, before reaching over to grab a pillow and absolutely demolishing James with it. James tried his best to fight it, but his best obviously wasn't enough seeing as his glasses were knocked clean off his face in less than ten seconds.
"You can be so glad I don't have my wand on me right now, because otherwise you'd already be on your merry way to the hospital wing" regulus glared, still attacking James with the pillow.
"Now, that would just be domestic abuse, reggie" James managed to choke out in between hits of the pillow in his face.
"Seeing as we are broken up, no it wouldn't" Regulus spat, full on straddling James now with the intention of suffocating him. Merlin, he was so lovely.
"Oh," James tried to say, but the pillow muffled his sounds, "my poem didn't work the wonders i thought it would then?"
"Absolutely not" Regulus said, but then he removed the pillow from James face. Normally, James would say he's glad to see his boyfriend in such a fortunate position, however, issue was that he couldn't really see him.
"Hand me my glasses, love, would you?" James whispered, still somehow utterly mesmerised by the blurred spot sitting atop him. Regulus, for once, complied and reached for his glasses which somehow got carefully sat on top of the nightstand next to Regulus bed in the midst of their fight. James had to bite his cheek so he wouldn't ridiculously smile at that.
That got significantly harder when Regulus sat the glasses on top of James nose, and James could actually see him again. Yeah no, his teeth were incredibly close to drawing blood now. The way Regulus tried his best to scowl but his piercing eyes always betrayed him, the way his hair gently spread down to his ears because he'd been growing it out over the weeks he spend at school, even though he knew he'd eventually have to cut it again. Oh and the way he was suddenly leaning down to bring his face closer to James was also pretty neat.
"Hi." James rasped, his eyes almost crossing so that he could keep looking at Regulus even though they were only a few centimetres apart.
Regulus snorted, "What are you all smiley about-" but promptly got cut off by a pair of lips crashing onto his own. Maybe he could forget about their poetry related break up for a couple of minutes. James was proven right when Regulus immediately caved in and curled into the kiss. He was so incredibly predictable.
They brushed against each other softly at first, but the longer they went on the faster and deeper the kiss became. Sometimes they mumbled incoherent words of affirmation or insults (you couldn't ever really be sure with Regulus) into each others mouths, often only getting a muffled groan in response. Regulus was basically laying on top of James by now, yet it still wasn't close enough for James liking.
If it were up to him, he would bring them out to the black lake where nobody could find them, and he'd break open his ribcage if it gave regulus the ability to simply shrink down and crawl inside. He'd let them rest there for eternity, until the plants that lay around them would eventually discover them to be part of their surroundings and start growing on them as well. So then, after they had already stayed there for centuries, they would only be another bump in the landscape.
He grew distracted when following that train of thought, and it wasn't really a surprise that Regulus had noticed, because he suddenly broke the kiss to ask "Please don't tell me you're thinking of the ribcage thing again"
James smirked "You know me so well"
"Shut up"
"Yes Sir."
And with that, James took his hand up to Regulus Jaw to hold him in place, while he gently brushed his lips against Regulus cheek. He did this again, on the other cheek, and then he began peppering slightly less gentle kisses all over Regulus face, because why should his mouth be the only thing that got James attention when he could just spread himself over the entirety of his face?
Regulus started smirking eventually, and James took that as a sign that he should definitely be paying attention to his mouth again. He dusted two quick kisses on each corner of Regulus smile before fully throwing himself into him again. Sometimes they way Regulus kissed was reminiscent of the way a gardener tended to his flowers, delicate and caring, knowing that the water he gives them is needed for their stay on the planet. Other times, it felt like each kiss was an insult, each roll of his tongue a snarl and every stifled groan a smack upside the head. James never really knew which kind would follow after the one he was experiencing in the moment and that made him crazy. In a good way, mostly.
Currently, he was being insulted in every language possible, and he relished in that. Sometimes Regulus teeth clashed against his own, and he would draw back for a second, slip on his gardener gloves and make sure James was okay, only to continue violently slandering him a few seconds later.
Whenever James tried breaking the kiss to playfully taunt Regulus about it though, Regulus would either not listen at all and throw their lips back together (which honestly, James did not mind at all!) or he'd indulge in him, and start nibbling at his collarbone and throat area, leaving his mouth free to speak. Not that James really managed to whenever that happened tho, he was too much of a weak man for that.
"So," James panted when Regulus gave his lips a break for the time being "Still convinced good ol' Edgar is better than me?"
Regulus mumbled something into the crook of James neck and kept smacking rough kisses into it, while his hands trailed up and down James sides, probably in an attempt to shut him up. Normally, that would have worked, but today James was a man on a mission. A still, technically single man.
"I didn't quite catch that, love" He smirked, knowing that what he was doing worked. Or not. Because instead of dramatically forgiving James for his controversial poetry opinions, Regulus literally chomped right into the space that connected James throat to his shoulder. Not hard enough for it to properly hurt, but still enough to signify that James wasn't forgiven yet. What an absolute lunatic, so sweet.
"Jesus, fine!" James burst out when he felt Regulus teeth graze against his collarbone, clearly preparing to bite yet again "You know Reg, this doesn't really seem like something single people do"
Regulus was still unimpressed, he kissed James throat hard one more time before coming up for air for what felt like the first time in years to glare at James. The sight would have been enough to make anyone break into a sweat if it weren't for the fact that Regulus lips were still ridiculously red, along with the rest of his face.
"And you ruined it." he deadpanned, and started to move off of James, much to his dismay.
"Reg, come on, we already did this two days ago" James groaned, grasping for Regulus who was now out of his reach, moving towards the mirror that hung near his bed in an attempt to fix his ridiculously messed up hair.
He smirked, reminiscing, before saying "yeah, and I enjoyed seeing you squirm to try and make up for that so I fear you will just have to keep trying"
"you're so mean to me" James sulked.
"Oh please," Regulus rolled his eyes, "as if you don't like that."
James felt his cheeks heat up then because yeah, okay, he did like that actually. However, he still had a goal to complete. "I'm still not telling you that Edgar Allan Poe is better than Jane Austen."
Regulus was still messing with his hair, an incredibly entertaining sight, before quickly stopping as if an idea had just popped into his head. Oh no. Ideas in Regulus head never meant good things for James.
"Well then, I guess I'll just have to go tell Barty I'm eligible then" he grinned, mischief already blooming in his eyes because he very well knew that this would work wonders on James. He really liked to pretend it wasn't true, but sometimes Regulus had James strung up like a puppet, knowing exactly what buttons he had to press for what reaction.
"Absolutely not" James burst out and sat up so quickly he almost fell off the bed.
Regulus snorted "Why not?"
James pondered for a second, thinking of something that could convince Regulus to give up on their break up. He knew that he was incredibly stubborn and wouldn't give up unless James betrayed Jane Austen, but James was also incredibly stubborn and would not, in fact, betray Jane Austen. Over his cold dead body.
Then, however, a thought formed in his head. If he couldn't beat Regulus at his game, he'd just have to switch positions.
"Because," he grinned, knowing that his victory was absolutely certain this time "I'd just have to break up with you."
Regulus, who was still busy styling his hair, paused mid air when he heard that. Slowly, he turned around to face James, very obviously astonished. "What."
"Oh you know, I am sick and tired of your infidelity Regulus" James cried and stood up, playing it up for the dramatics that Regulus loved so much. The fact that he almost never called Regulus by his full name these days also helped, because Regulus almost flinched when the name rolled off James tongue.
"You can't break up with me, that's not how it works" Regulus sputtered, bewildered at the switch up. Whilst Regulus had jokingly broken up with James so many times that they almost hit tripple digits, but the thought hadn't occurred to James even once.
"Oh, but I'm doing it right now, aren't I?" James taunted.
"I already broke up with you, you can't just do it again"
"Sadly, I don't recall that happening."
"What-" Regulus started, confused out of his mind, but quickly got interrupted by James, who was now determined to win this battle.
"Anyways, I promised Remus and Lily i'd help them in the library. You know where to find me, but incase you want to see me again," He taunted, now leaning close to Regulus to deliver the final blow "I fear you will just have to keep trying"
They were so close now that by default both of them almost leaned in for a kiss. Almost. Because James was more determined than he had ever been in his entire life to get Regulus to get him back. A lot of words just to say that he basically just wanted attention.
When Regulus went to lean in however, because sometimes he managed to be an even weaker man than James, James just smiled brightly and stepped away from him, before cheerfully calling out a "See you later, mate!" and promptly leaving the room.
Regulus was left dumbfounded.
________
Okay, James Potter was absolutely evil. Screw all the talk about every dark wizard stemming from slytherin, no, the gryffindors were the real villains because what the actual fuck?
Needless to say, Regulus did not enjoy this new arrangement. He did not want to be the one that chased after James and got manipulated into begging James to just take him back.
Needless to say, he was going to do it anyways.
In all honesty, he found it just a tiny bit hilarious. He might've even laughed if he hadn't been so offended. Sure it was fun to tease James and mess with him and then get to watch James try his best to make whatever silly mistake he had made up to Regulus, but being on the different end of the entire spiel was a completely different experience, and Regulus understood why James hadn't told him off for keeping the entire thing up yet.
"Barty" Regulus exclaimed the second he saw him walk into their dorm with Evan in tow. Lord knows what they had been up to again, they'd been disappearing together far more often than usual lately but not that it was any of Regulus business. Well, it probably was considering they were his best friends and all, but if they were just off doing illegal shit again Regulus was not too keen on partaking in it.
"Regulus" Barty greeted with a little bow, that made Evan chuckle but only deepened Regulus already prepared glare.
"You're the type of guy who upsets the people he dates a lot" Regulus posed, not even as a question but as a simple statement because, really, he would know. The amount of times Barty had had a drink thrown at his face at some party was actually astounding.
"Thank you?" Barty muttered almost like it was a question. Right okay, maybe borderline insults weren't the best way to go about asking for relationship advice.
Regardless, Regulus was going to try "How do you make it up to them?"
Evan and Barty physically recoiled at that, as if Regulus asking Barty for guidance was the most insane idea they could fathom. It probably was, their brain capacity was pretty limited (Regulus liked to ignore the fact that Barty was probably a whole lot smarter than him).
"Excuse me?" Barty sputtered at the same time as Evan asked "Trouble with Potter then?"
This, grabbed Barty's attention again, and the confusion on his face lifted to be replaced by utter glee "Wait, really?" he beamed, as if he'd have a chance even if there were real trouble. He would not. Regulus learned from his past mistakes (an incredibly immature relationship that lasted for a whole two weeks when they found out that the other also liked guys before breaking up over a literal game of poker that had left Evan extremely confused.)
Regulus just tried to glare at Barty some more, because James did say he'd break up with him if he let his singleness slip to barty, but he couldn't help the fond smile that slowly but surely crept onto his lips.
"Okay why is he smiling at that" Evan asked, just as confused as he had been during that long ago poker game.
Regulus snapped out of it, because he was still convinced that he needed to put on his stoic no smile persona in order to keep the dork allegations about him at bay. Dorcas had called him a nerd once and he still hadn't recovered. He cleared his throat before declaring "You wouldn't get it."
Barty snorted "Yeah, I'm glad I don't. You guys are so weird with each other"
"That's a lie," Evan smirked "He cries every night because he's jealous of both of you and wants to know if you're looking for a third"
"Shut up, both of you suck at helping" Regulus growled, because he clearly wasn't getting anywhere with this.
"Wait, okay, slow down, you're actually serious? Like, you guys are having...Issues?" Barty gulped, as if the words 'relationship issues' were foreign to him. They probably were, considering how all of his relationships basically only consisted of issues, so he wouldn't be able to recognise them as anything but normal.
"Yes, and I'm obviously desperate, otherwise I wouldn't be asking you."
"Uhm...." Barty mumbled, at a loss for words.
"Wait," Evan interrupted, being the one out of the two most willing to cooperate with regulus like always, "What did you even do?"
Regulus blinked. Christ, this was embarrassing. He wondered if he would be able to go drown himself in the black lake before either Evan or Barty could hunt him down.
Regulus gritted his teeth "may of may not have threatened to cheat on him with Barty" Yeah no, he was absolutely never hearing the end of this.
As expected Evan and Barty burst out laughing immediately, and Regulus was left to wonder what he had even thought when going to them for help. He didn't doubt that even filch would have been better at relationship advice than them. Still, they were his best friends after all, so you couldn't really blame him for believing in them for a split moment.
You should tho.
"Oh my god," Barty gasped out between fits of laughter after about a minute "I didn't realise I was a home wrecker"
Evan was on the floor now. Absolutely fantastic.
"You are absolutely not a home wrecker seeing as my home is not wrecked" Regulus pouted.
"Yet" Evan almost yelled and- yep, there went Barty, now also on the floor. Why was Regulus only friends with absolute lunatics.
"Will you guys help or not?" He shouted, and that seemed to grab the others attention at least a little bit. Their eyes were still wet from laughter, but at least they tried to hide it now. They weren't good at it.
"We're sorry, we're sorry" Evan apologised for both him and Barty because they were mostly one being as is. Wherever Evan went, Barty followed.
"Fine yeah, go ahead and consult your mistress for advice." Barty smirked.
"Oh please I didn't actually cheat with you, I only threatened."
"Don't you say you always follow through on your threats?" Evan taunted. This was a direct reference to the fact that he actually threatened a lot of people, and if those people managed to somehow not stop whatever it was that they were doing after, Regulus wasn't one to give a second warning.
He would make an exception in this case.
Regulus glared and that seemed to answer the question posed by Evan.
"Right, so, I'm going to need a bit of background information" said Barty, who now actually seemed intend on helping Regulus out.
"Why?" Regulus rolled his eyes.
"We just need to get a picture of the Situation" Evan gave his input, even tho Regulus wasn't sure he had asked for it.
"Fine, i guess," Regulus sighed "Me and James have this thing where I break up with him over something petty every couple of days and he like, makes it up to me"
Barty raised his eyebrows "As in..?"
"No, you pervert," Regulus scoffed "As in he does something that's either funny or horribly cheesy with the right amount of drama surrounding it and I forgive him like the kind soul I am"
"And let me guess, he figured out he could turn the tables?" Evan guessed, definitely more concentrated on the entire ordeal than Barty.
Regulus felt the corners of his mouth tugging when he thought of the way James had ran out of his dorm after accusing him of infidelity, truly a sight for sore eyes, "Yes. While I was breaking up with him too."
Barty's head jerked and he burst out "He can do that?"
"Thats what I said!" Regulus groaned.
"Okay so," Evan started recapping "basically you threatened to cheat on your boyfriend during some weird play fight flirting ordeal and then he play fight flirting broke up with you and now you're looking for something fun to cheer him up."
"Just so you know, you're absolutely welcome to follow through on that threat"
Regulus nodded, completely blending Barty out like white noise "Yes, exactly, and I know that Barty tends to upset a lot of women so I'd like to know how he usually fixes it"
"He mostly shags them and then just doesn't fix it" Evan spat and suddenly turned to glare at Barty so viciously that even Regulus was taken aback a little.
Barty's gaze drops to the floor "Yeah he's right, I mostly shag them and then just don't fix it"
"But-" Regulus was about to say, but apparently Evan had forgotten all about his intentions to ever help him.
"Yeah well maybe you should stop shagging and start just doing something, instead of acting like the women suddenly don't exist anymore when you're in front of other women?"
"Am I missing something here?" Barty asked and Regulus was a little glad for that, because he was also worried that he was missing something.
"I don't know crouch, you tell me"
"Oh fuck no, please don't start playing mind games with me like Regulus and James do," Barty groaned, head still dropped "You know, when they do it it's hot but you're just fucking terrifying-"
"Oh when Regulus does it its fine?" Evan deadpanned and Regulus still had no idea what the fuck was going on here. But, he could realise that he wasn't getting anywhere so maybe it was time to leave them be anyways.
"So your advice is that I just shag James" Regulus interrupted, unimpressed, because he truly had better things to do than to listen to his dorm mates bickering.
"Yeah" Evan and Barty grinned in perfect sync, and for a second their quarrelling was gone with no traces left. Honestly, he could have figured they would come up with something like that. Time to seek out someone else.
"You guys are no help" Regulus scoffed before standing up to leave. "I'm going to find the only sensible person left in this godforsaken castle"
"Have fun with Potter, please knock before you come in again" Barty called after him, just as he'd put his foot outside the door.
Regulus quirked an eyebrow, unsure of why exactly he'd have to knock on his own dorm room before entering "Okay?"
His confusion was obviously hilarious to the other two, because they immediately burst into laughter as soon as the word left his mouth. Regulus wasn't about to be distracted by the lecture he could be able to throw at them tho. No, he was determined and he had a goal to get to.
_________
"Give him rocks"
"I will not be giving him rocks, Pandora"
The only sensible person left in the godforsaken castle was only a little bit better than Evan and Barty had been.
"Well then, give him one of your poems then. We all know you write enough about him." Pandora teases, a sweet giggle already lingering in her voice.
"I would rather use all three unforgivables on myself"
"Then we're back to giving him rocks."
Regulus rolled his eyes. Explaining his entire situation to Pandora had already taken say too long and he still hadn't come to a solution. Honestly, he was starting to feel a little sorry for putting James through this every few days because jesus was it stressful.
"Merlin I'm horrible at this, how hasn't he actually broken up with me yet?" Regulus groaned, dropping his head into his hands.
"That's what i've been wondering." Pandora muttered under her breath as if she thought Regulus couldn't hear her. "Oh don't say that, you just need some inspiration!" She quickly added, as if it wasn't completely contradictory to her first statement. What a confusing woman.
Regulus turned his head up to stare at her blankly. She was twirling one of her blonde locs between her fingers, and her lips were pursed as if she were concentrating. Then, "Well, what does he usually do to get you to forgive him?"
Regulus blinks. Honestly, he should have thought about that earlier. "I don't know, most of the time he just says something funny or cheesy and i'll let it go. Sometimes he gives me one of his novels"
Pandora perked up at that. "See! He gives you gifts too to reconcile. I am once again proposing the idea of rocks-"
"Pandora I swear to Merlin if you mention rocks one more time I am throwing both of us off the astronomy tower
"Okey-dokey" Pandora sighed.
"And also," Regulus continued "I very much doubt books would do the job here considering we're broken up because of literature"
Pandora shook her head "you're both so immature."
Regulus chose to ignore her "Besides, I can't just copy the stuff he does. I need to like, make a grant gesture"
She quirked an eyebrow "why, exactly?"
"So I can beat him at his own game."
She let out an actual giggle now, sickly sweet and so warm that Regulus almost missed the insult that followed "Jesus christ you guys are immature"
"Shut it" Regulus growled, still completely lost on what to do about James. His time was absolutely running out.
"Maybe I'm not the best person to ask. I mean, i've never had to make up anything to anyone because quite frankly, I'm perfect and I don't know James that well" Pandora suggest, as if that thought hadn't been brewing in Regulus head ever since the beginning of the conversation.
"Then who else am I meant to go to?" Regulus sulked, still upset at the fact that he'd have to go to anyone other than Pandora with his problems. Because Pandora was the one person he could always trust would help, and now he was totally stranded.
"Well," Pandora said after thinking for a bit, "what about your brother? He knows James better than anyone and I'm fairly certain he's had to apologise for petty mistakes numerous times and-"
"Oh sure," Regulus interrupted her, "let me just go to my brother, who already isn't too fond of me, and ask him for advice on how to get his best mate back so I can keep sleeping with him"
Pandora blinked at him for a brief moment before opening her mouth again "Yeah okay, maybe don't go to him"
Regulus scoffed "Thanks" but quickly put on a reassuring smile when he saw Pandora start to frown. Yeah, he might've flicked Evan and Barty against the head for that, and even Dorcas would've gotten her fair share of eye-rolls, but Pandora was different. If you willingly upset Pandora, you were a monster and to be shunned from the entirety of the United Kingdom.
Regulus reached out to pat her on the shoulder "And anyways, you're basically the only no-nonsense person in this castle so-" He got interrupted by a loud gasp that Pandora let out.
Her previously dropped head whipped up to face Regulus and she clamped her hands down onto his shoulders. Then, she basically yelled "No I'm not!"
Regulus did not really understand. He didn't get why she was so offended on other peoples behalf, but Regulus genuinely sometimes believed that Pandora was in fact the only person around him that still had some sense drilled into her. Might not make sense to others considering they liked calling her a nutcase and all that, but Regulus thought of those people as imbeciles anyways.
"Regulus, listen to me, I am not the only sober and rational person in the castle!" Pandora shook his shoulders, and Merlin, her grip was tight.
"What are you-" Regulus began, but then it clicked. Obviously Pandora wasn't the only one who still had some amount of sense knocked into her. There was always someone that managed to top her in seriousness.
"Oh, Pandora, you're a genius!" Regulus exclaimed excitedly, because coming here apparently wasn't a waste of time after all.
"Yeah, i've heard that coming from a lot of people" Pandora hums, clearly fond of the praise she was receiving. Regulus could tell that she was trying to play it cool, but the not so secretive fidgeting with her bracelets gave away that she was actually really excited to be able to help.
"Right, well," Regulus mumbled absentmindedly, already focused on his new goal, "I'll go find her now, and then we'll meet at dinner, yeah?"
Pandora nodded with a smile on her face and yelled after him "You go do that!"
And he did.
__________
Regulus had originally planned to simply steal Lily away from James, but as it turned out there was no need for that.
"Where's James?" he asked Lily and Remus with a quirked eyebrow, not wanting James to walk in on them discussing him.
"Not here," Lily rolled her eyes at him "if you want to do something about your whole breakup thing he went up to his dorm"
"Ah," Regulus clicked his to tongue "he told you about that then?"
Remus and Lily turned to look at each other and snorted all at once.
"Saying he just 'told us' is understating it a little. He was practically doing cartwheels about the fact that he was now an, as he called it, eligible bachelor" Remus mumbled, incredibly amused at Regulus obvious fondness.
Really, it was quite entertaining to see James have so much fun with this. If Regulus weren't insanely stressed on how he was supposed to make it up to him, he might've even enjoyed it.
"Well it's okay, I'm not here for him anyways" said Regulus, who would not stray from his path to success to matter how ridiculous his boyfriend slash not boyfriend was being.
"Come for advice, then?" Lily mused, also very amused. The longer this went on, the more Regulus regretted ever starting it.
"Yes." He gritted out through his teeth, very much against the fact that he was currently seeking out help from James ex girlfriend and best friend. Still, they probably were the most equipped people for the job and Regulus would just have to get over himself.
"What do you wanna know?" Lily mused. She was busying her hands with sharpening her already sharp pencils because god forbid her utensils were anything but perfect. Honestly, it was a little funny to see her after spending time with Barty, because they were both so similar in such different ways. Yeah, they had both been top students in their respective years since they started at Hogwarts, but while Lily was always prepared for everything, you sometimes found Barty writing his assignments in eyeliner he'd stolen form Dorcas.
"How do I make it up to him?" Regulus asked. He was sitting opposite Lily and Remus now, staring both of them into the eyes, somehow. People often told him he was technically just as bad at eye contact as Pandora (who could not look someone directly in the eye to save her life) because he would always overdo it. There was no casual with him, it was always deep, menacing soul staring. But Lily and Remus were used to it by now.
"What do you mean?" Remus posed.
"Well, Pandora says i should give him rocks or something," Lily had to stifle her laughter at that, "but I'm obviously not doing that and that was the only proper suggestion I got from any of my friends so I'm here to ask what I should do for him instead?"
"I think he'd appreciate the rocks" Remus flashed him a grin.
"Lupin." Regulus hissed sharply and Remus held his hands up in defeat.
"Okay, I see the issue with rocks," Lily muttered, completely dismissing Remus and Regulus brief altercation "But why can't you just give him something else?"
Regulus rolled his eyes. Why did nobody understand the point he was trying to make? "Because that's just lazy. It needs to be a grant gesture to even things out, so he doesn't beat me."
Lily quirked an eyebrow and said "beat you?" at the same time as Remus chuckled "so what, you're going to serenade him during dinner?"
Regulus entire body tensed up and his face twisted into a scowl. The mere thought of him doing something so horribly cheesy and so horribly James gave him shudders. No doubt James would be ecstatic.
It was then that Lily snorted and changed Regulus entire perspective with a few simple words "Oh no, I think Regulus wouldn't even be able to be that cheesy if it meant saving his life"
Well.
Technically Lily Evans wasn't wrong with that assumption.
But Regulus will be damned if he's just talking about how he needs a grant gesture, only for someone to immediately shut him down by saying he could never achieve it anyways.
Because even more than he was closed off and sarcastic, even more than he was anti-romance and Jane Austen, even more than he hated attention from the public, Regulus was petty.
He was the pettiest person he knew, even more so than his brother and other family members, and that was saying something. He was so petty that he had became slytherins quidditch seeker in his second year because he knew Sirius hadn't managed to become gryffindors. He was so petty that he'd break up with the person he's in love with because of their opinion on his favourite authors. He was so petty that he would put all of his regular characteristics and values aside if it meant proving someone who said he couldn't do something wrong.
He was so petty that he would now sooner die than not serenade James Potter in front of the entire school as a giant "fuck you!" to Lily Evans.
Well, at least now he had found out how to make it up to James.
"Remus," Regulus groaned, already dreading the moment where he would no doubt lose all of his decency just because of the stupid pair that James and Lily made, "you have a turntable, right?"
And with that, it was settled.
_______
Okay, maybe James regretted his entire drama a little bit. Sure, it had been incredibly fun at first but now he was sitting next to Sirius in the great hall and left to stare at Regulus empty seat at the slytherin table where, mind you, Barty was also missing.
Yes, James was very much aware that Regulus was probably not currently snogging Barty in some dark corner, because James trusted him and also knew that he was at least a little bit fond of him, but there was still a tiny part of James head that was just a little bit jealous that Barty was getting to spend time with Regulus when he wasn't.
It also didn't help that now after he had left Lily and Remus alone, he couldn't even sulk about it to anyone. The next best thing was poking around in his food and glaring at the frustratingly empty spot at the slytherin table hoping that if he just stared hard enough, Regulus would somehow materialise out of thin air.
"Okay mate, what's going on?" Sirius suddenly burst out next to him. Shit, his glaring was way too obvious. Sirius had already noticed a hickey on James neck earlier in the day (Regulus had no doubt left that there on purpose, the cheeky little bastard) and James had only barely avoided drawing suspicion, so he really had to be more careful.
"Nothing" James mumbled, putting all the nonchalance he possessed into the word. Sadly, he was a very chalant man, even though he wasn't exactly sure that that word existed, so there wasn't a lot he was able to put into it.
Sirius, obviously, picked up on this "Prongs..."
Christ, were all of his attempts at anything going to go backwards today?
"Pad's..." James murmured, in another attempt to distract Sirius. This, once again, did not work.
"Seriously, whats the matter with you? You were so cheery earlier and now you're sitting here like a wet sponge"
I broke up with your little brother but am regretting it now because I haven't had my tongue down his throat in the past three hours , James wanted to say, but didn't because he would have to be suicidal in order to.
"Prank I had planned on slytherin that didn't work out" James went for instead, because it was technically part of the truth. Regulus was a slytherin and while James hadn't exactly wanted to prank him, he did plan to kind of take the piss and that was now backfiring.
"Oh, don't worry about that, we'll get them another time. We can try putting catnip for mcgonagall into reggie's clothes if you want, he forgot his cardigan at our dorm last time he hung out with us. Weird though, because i can recall that day being a no uniform day." Sirius tried to cheer him up, but at the mention of Regulus (who most definitely did not forget his cardigan at their dorm when he last hung out with Sirius) James let out a sound that seemed like something stuck between a hysterical giggle and a whimper.
Sirius apparently doesn't have it in him to question that, so he lets James just rest his head onto his shoulder when he drops it there.
"What is Regulus even doing anyways" Peter suddenly appeared. James hadn't seen him for the entire day, but he was glad that he was here now. Even if he couldn't know about why exactly James was sulking, him just being there would still be comfort to James. This changed however, as he suddenly sat down in front of James, obscuring his view of Regulus empty seat. Git.
"Hey Wormtail." James mumbled into Sirius shoulder, making Peter raise his eyebrows.
"What's up with him?" He asked.
"Tried to prank slytherin but it went wrong" Sirius answered in a tone that made it clear that he didn't think that was all there was to it.
"Oh," Peter tilted his head to the side "Is that why Regulus is dragging around a turntable with him?"
"What?" James entire body perked up at the mention of Regulus. He could see past Peter now that his head was tilted and yeah, he was telling the truth.
There stood Regulus, a scowl etched deep into his face and a turntable in his arms. Even tho he had seen Regulus just a few hours ago, his face still lit up at the sight of him, and he felt a tugging at the corner of his mouth. The tugging stopped, however, when he saw Barty only a few metres behind Regulus, trying to summon something to plug the turntable into. But still, he felt better than he had before.
"Christ, I knew just hoping for the best and not properly explaining it to them wasn't going to cut it" Remus sighed, because he had also sat down at their table sometime during James staring.
"Wait- You helped him with that?" Sirius yelped, "Remus is that your turntable?"
Remus just shrugged, and turned to look at James with a slight smile on his lips, and James eyes widened. Did his whole break up actually not backfire?
Wait. Was Regulus dragging around the turntable for him?
"Okay, excuse me," suddenly a voice boomed around the entirety of the great hall, unfamiliar to some but oh so recognisable to James "can everybody shut up for a second so I can get everyone's attention?"
There stood Regulus, on top of a chair at the slytherin table, with quite literally everyones eyes on him.
Everyone in the room suddenly quieted down, even the professor's. Mcgonagall briefly tried opening her mouth, but before a sound could escape, professor dumbledore shushed her, clearly very interested in what was about to go down. James was as well.
"Okay, right, so," Regulus voice continued echoing "uhm, hi. Before I say anything I just want to clarify that I am basically being forced to do this and that this would under no circumstances ever happen willingly, if you ever dare to bring this up to me in a conversation ever again I will send you to the hospital wing"
James snorted, because Regulus looked so absolutely ridiculous. He was holding a piece of paper that he was reading from and had somehow charmed a dining fork to work as what muggles called a microphone, and his expression made it so very clear that he would rather be fighting centaurs in the forbidden forrest than be here. Barty, who was still right behind him with the turntable, looked as though he would fight centaurs just to be here. James kind of feels the same.
"What the fuck is he doing" a delighted voice behind him murmured and, oh- right, Sirius was still next to him and he would have to control his excitement. Bummer.
"So, you might know me as a prefect or the little black brother, or just as Regulus, but there is someone here who knows me as all of those and so much more....Jesus fucking christ Pandora, this is the cheesiest shit i've ever seen, do I seriously have to read all that?" Regulus groaned into his fork-microphone and at least half of the great hall dissolved into quiet giggles, James very much included. May Pandoras pillows forever be cold if she was the one to write this speech.
Pandora apparently was the one who wrote the speech, because she now also stood up to yell "You asked for grant gesture and I gave you grant gesture, do not complain!"
Oh, this was definitely about James, alright? And well, James was enjoying every single second of it.
"Yeah okay, whatever," Regulus sputtered, seeming very desperate to just get it over with already, "Fuck the speech, this is grant enough."
Regulus carefully got off of his chair to place the paper in his hands onto the table, before getting right back up.
"Language, mister black" Professor slughorn yelled from the Teachers dining table, but made no moves to stop Regulus, who seemed very disappointed about that. But yeah, no, he wasn't getting out of the Situation this easily.
"Sorry professor," Regulus mumbled, before clearing his throat, "Okay so, Pandora, I hate you just as much as I hate everyone else in this room, but there is someone here I hate slightly less than that, or whatever, so yeah this ones for.... oh for fuck's sake Barty just start playing the goddamn record!"
"Mister Black!" Mcgonagall was the one yelling now, and James prayed to every single god he could think of that she wouldn't stop Regulus. One of the religions in his head must have been real though, because none of the teachers even twitched a finger to stop the scene in front on them.
Then, just as Barty yelled "Finally!" a familiar tune started playing just as loud as Regulus voice had been. James didn't know the exact song by the opening notes, but he knew that he had heard it before, probably from Sirius or Remus during a rainy day, where the four marauders would just hang around in their dorm and play various records from morning to evening.
"Holy shit," Sirius whispered next to him, "is that little git really playing love of my life by queen?"
"Yeah Pads, I think he is" Remus spoke, before turning his attention to James and mouthing "Cheers" so quietly that Sirius couldn't overhear.
James was fucking beaming. He was ecstatic. This was actually the best thing to ever happen since the invention of quidditch. Hell, maybe even better than since before that. Regulus was making an absolute fucking fool out of himself, and James knew for sure that if Regulus had to choose between death and doing this he'd most likely choose death, but he was still doing it for James, because making James happy was more important than death to him.
Also, love of his life? Yeah, that also added onto James ready to burst happiness.
"So, as I was saying, this is for you. Sort of, Lily Evans said I couldn't do it so naturally I have to prove her wrong and Evan gave me three galleons to make sure I wouldn't chicken out, so don't let it get to your head." Regulus gritted through his teeth, now directly looking at James.
In any other moment, James would have probably been scared that people around them would notice, but now people around them seemed like the last thing on his mind. He wasn't even sure if they still existed, because even if James had tried to rip his gaze away from Regulus couldn't have ever seen anyone else. There was Regulus in front of him, and only Regulus. He could never again see anybody else.
And when he smiled at Regulus, when he beared his teeth with the same intensity that beasts who were about to feast used, when his entire body was radiating heat similar to the sun, James could swear he saw the corner of Regulus mouth twitching up to greet him. Just him. Because Regulus also only ever saw James in rooms like this, no matter how hard James tried to accuse him of silly infidelity.
James couldn't really contain his happiness, so he let out a hearty laugh that probably earned him an odd look from Sirius, but he couldn't bring himself to care.
"Oh, great, you're letting it get to your head." Regulus huffed and James just knew that there was also laughter hidden in that huff, "if you don't take me back after this I will break into your dorm and throw us both out of the window"
And then, in a shocking term of events, Regulus actually began to fucking sing in the middle of the great hall. James Jaw just about hit the fucking floor, because what?
"love of my life,
you've hurt me
you've broken my heart
and now you leave me"
Regulus Arcturus Black, the boy who would sooner drown than wear his heart on his sleeve, was fucking serenading him in front of their entire school in a fashion that would've made even the marauders question if it was something they really should do.
It wasn't good or anything, matter of fact it was actually very lacking of Freddie Mercury's usual energy and entirely off beat due to the fact that Regulus very rarely listened to Queen, but he still sang it just because he knew James loved the song. And James really did love that song. He loved it more than any other song, and he was so very glad that the song seemed to love him also.
"love of my life
can't you see?"
All around him, people at the table were full on laughing now, because to them there was just stoic and sarcastic Regulus black belting out a love song in the middle of the great hall in such a monotone manner that it made the entire ordeal even funnier. And yeah, it was all that to James as well, don't get him wrong, he was on the brink of tears from holding back his laughter.
But to James, this was also the exact ridiculous display of love that he wasn't sure he would ever get. Yeah, he's always been sure that he'd be the one to do that, and that was still the case (seriously, James would turn this into a duet the second Regulus asked) but he wasn't ever convinced that someone would to that for him. To love him in a way similar to the one that he loved in.
"Bring it back, bring it back
don't take it away from me"
Regulus was still holding eye contact with James, which made it really hard for him not just stand up and declare his love for Regulus right then and there. He didn't though, because it was probably not the smartest idea for two blokes to publicly admit to fancying each other, even if a handful of James friends knew and were okay with it. Oh, and the whole 'dating his best mates little brother' thing would have probably been an issue as well.
"Because you don't know
what it means to me"
"Since when is he going out with a bird? And why does he keep looking at our table?" Sirius whispered, absolutely appalled.
James just snorted "No idea padfoot"
There was a very small instrumental break, which Regulus used to furthermore communicate with James "Okay so, that was that, can I stop now?"
James frowned. He didn't really want Regulus to stop, not ever, but he also didn't want to make him suffer for eternity. Only for a little bit. So, James held up one finger in a way that Regulus could see it but Sirius couldn't, to signify that Regulus should sing the chorus once more for good measure.
Regulus noticed what James was trying to say, because he noticed everything James ever tried to tell him, really, and let out a groan filled with more Energy than he had sung any of the song with.
"I'm breaking up with you once we're together again, I hope your aware" Regulus spat into his fork furiously, but James could see the faintest smile creeping onto his lips.
Next to him, the other black brother roared with laughter "That makes no sense but please put that energy into singing the song, reggie!"
The rest of the great hall bellowed with laughter and scrambled over themselves to agree with Sirius, so James also picked up the courage to just yell along with them.
"Yeah, just a tad bit more energy, love!" the nickname slipped off his tongue before he could stop it, but apparently the entire evening had already been so ridiculous that Sirius didn't question it. He just laughed along with James and everything was alright.
Regulus was about to open his mouth, probably to spit back an insult at Sirius, but the loud voice of Freddie Mercury forced him back into action.
"Love of my life
Don't leave me
You've taken my love
and now desert me"
Regulus scrambled to sing, but there was just a little bit more energy this time.
"You know, the girl must have him properly wrapped around her finger if he's willing to serenade her-" Sirius mumbled, but his mumbling was too loud for James liking because it kind of drowned Regulus out, so James just aggressively swatted at him to stop, and it surprisingly worked.
Then, there was also the thought that the girl that had Regulus wrapped helplessly around her finger was, in fact James and it made James grin so hard that his jaw would most definitely dislocate if his connective tissue were as weak as Remus'.
Regulus was absolutely never hearing the end of this from Sirius, but that meant that James could join in on the teasing whenever he and Sirius were around, and that alone promised a whole lot of fun.
"bring it back
bring it back
don't take it away from me"
A few students, Barty, Evan, Pandora and Dorcas among them, had joined in by now, and it was basically a whole shitty choir performance of the song. James liked to think that Queen would be proud, because James was, and he liked to think that he would always share Queen's opinion on everything. In fact, James was very happy even. He was going to go snog Regulus so incredibly fiercely later when Sirius was asleep, just you wait and see.
"because you dont know"
James actually did know what it meant to him, considering he was willing to make a scene like this in front of all pf his friends and enemies. It filled James with the ridiculous urge to twirl his hair and kick his feet like a school girl dreaming about Elvis Presley. When he found his hand actually sneaking up to his head to slightly pluck at his hair, he almost jolted because of how downright embarrassing that was.
To make things worse, Regulus obviously noticed as well, because when he sang the last lines of the second part of the song, he burst into hearty laughter.
"what it means to me"
The long instrumental part of the song started playing and there was some shuffling at the teachers table, before Slughorn stood up as if he had only now remembered that he was supposed to be a professor.
"Alright, that's quite enough mister Black, please make your way to my office after dinnertime, and I am afraid I'll have to take five points off slytherin for so loudly disrupting mealtimes" He shouted over the music and the laughter of his very own students.
"Oh thank merlin, finally, that took you long enough" Regulus muttered into his fork, absolutely relieved.
He signalled for Barty to stop and when the song quieted down, the entire great hall erupted into applause, with James possibly clapping louder than everyone else combined. Regulus did not bow or bathe in the attention like Sirius or James might've, but he did jump down from his chair as opposed to carefully slipping off, and James thought of it as Regulus own little acknowledgement of the fact that what he just did was actually kind of cool.
Barty, of course, did bow even though he had very little to do with the thing over all, but James didn't find it in himself to care about that.
Sirius was also grinning from ear to ear, "Since when is Reggie actually cool?"
Remus snorted next to them "I very much doubt he'll still be out there randomly bursting into song after today"
"Well, yes, but that was like a proper 'me' move. I would have so done something like that for Mary in fifth year"
Peter rolled his eyes at him "Please don't start serenading people, padfoot"
"Fine, alright, but that was still completely mental. Surely that made up for whatever Prank of yours backfired, right prongs?"
Remus raised both of his eyebrows at James, who desperately needed to catch ahold of Regulus the second he stepped foot out of Slughorns office. He genuinely couldn't think of anything else as he watched Regulus bury his head in his hands at the table across the great hall.
"Oh yeah pads, that definitely made up for it"
_______
James was pacing in front of Slughorns office. He was basically shaking with excitement to see Regulus, like the flesh would melt off his bones if Regulus hands wouldn't reach it in time. His lungs felt like they were aching for oxygen, even though his mouth was (sadly) free to breath however it pleased, and only Regulus could feed him the air he so desperately needed to survive. Preferably through mouth to mouth.
James had been standing here for the past five minutes, but it still felt like he'd been there for a century. Slipping off from Sirius had been extremely difficult, because Sirius was still recounting the events of the evening every chance he got ('And did you see the way he grinned at out table James?' 'yes padfoot' 'And that means that this bird of his is probably in our house!' 'probably Padfoot' ) as if James wasn't too aware of them for his own good.
He had almost slipped up for the billionth time when Remus had finally managed to get Sirius to help him with his potions homework, even though it was very clear that Remus did not really need help with it. James really owed him.
In any case, James wouldn't be able to do him a favour if Regulus didn't step out of the door within the next ten seconds, because otherwise James was going to literally explode.
As if Slughorn had read his mind and not wanted any gore sticking to his office door, Regulus did in fact step out of it within the next ten seconds.
"Oh hello James, didn't except you there" Regulus deadpanned, every trace of a boy who was willing to serenade his loved ones gone from him. But oh, not from James mind.
"Shut up, you absolute sap” James panted as he was already urging forward to press his and Regulus mouths together.
They were both helpless really, because they had proven over and over again that they were willing to do literally everything just to feel like this. To feel like they were puzzle pieces, crafted to specifically fit each other, and nobody else. Kissing each other felt like they were a piece of clay that was ripped apart and left to dry out over time, only to be glued right back together, if only for a moment. The moment Regulus lips met his it felt like the entirety of every ocean on earth was crashing against him with such a force that entire city’s could be drowned. And James would die a happy man if he just drowned in Regulus.
James was so incredibly needy in the moment, even though he had quite literally just gotten everything he ever needed a few moments a go, especially because of that. He groaned at the mere touch of Regulus hands to his cheeks, and when Regulus tried to pull away James simply followed him as if he were a shadow.
“James-“ Regulus wheezed as he forcefully clawed his way out of the firm grip James had on both his jaw and his waist. Oh. Wonder when that happened. “James, James, James wait- James no, not here James, alright?”
The way Regulus was basically chanting his name like a prayer did not make it easier to listen to the whole ‘not here where literally everyone could potentially see’ thing.
“Why not?” James frowned, feeling absolutely betrayed at the fact that Regulus was withdrawing.
“Because people can and will see”
“Let them” James challenged. Who, exactly, he challenged he wasn’t sure of. God? Sirius? Professor Slughorn? Barty, maybe? His own Sanity? Regulus’ patience?
Regulus snorted at him, like he so often did. James loved the sound so very much, “James, as much as I appreciate your eagerness, I am not too confident in my abilities to successfully obliviate someone in case they see us, so can we please just get to the astronomy tower already?”
James perked up at that. He very much enjoyed the astronomy tower. “Astronomy tower?”
“Sure,” Regulus lip twitched, “Astronomy tower.”
They started walking down the corridor together, and at some point Regulus moved close enough for James to hook his pinky with Regulus’ because that’s what they usually did when they were alone but not secure in that aloneness. They could easily slip their pinkies away from each other should someone randomly turn the corner, but they were still tasting at least a little bit of the physical contact they both so desperately craved. It was a little sad to think about, but it was just the way things had to be. And James was glad for the fact that things could be this way between them. Occasionally, when they were feeling their bravest, they bumped shoulders. James was feeling very brave tonight.
“So….” James started once they had enjoyed a couple minutes of silence together. There was way too much for James to rant about.
“Do not.” Regulus hissed, as if James words were painful to him.
“Oh, trust me love, I will”
“You are so insufferable, I will never do anything like this for you ever again and I regret doing it”
“Oh, but I thought I was the love of your life?” James mused, so helplessly fond of the way Regulus buried his head deep into James shoulder and groaned.
“I lied. Please just shut up, that was the single most mortifying thing i’ve ever done”
“Oh but I found it endearing”
“Of course you would, I did it for you”
James lips curled up even more, which was probably a little ridiculous considering there were very few people Regulus could’ve done that for other than James.
“Yeah, and I still can’t really believe it. I was under the impression you would sooner die than do all that” James exclaimed, absolutely astonished still.
“That is still the case, don’t you worry” Regulus said, before clearing his throat, “There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature.”
James stared blankly at him, opened his mouth and closed it, before opening it again “That was Jane Austen.”
“What can I say,” Regulus sighed, “I’m feeling nice today.”
James suddenly came to a halt, because he suddenly desperately needs Regulus to realise how important that had been to him, “That was genuinely one of the nicest things anyones ever done to me”
Regulus seemed to realise this immediately. Maybe it was because of his intense literature addiction, but Regulus always seemed to be able to read him like a book “I’m glad then. Cause that’s kind of what I wanted it to be.”
“No, genuinely Reg, it was hilarious and all, but I also just really appreciated it” James almost whimpered, all his focus on his hands so that they wouldn’t dart up and start cradling Regulus face.
“Yeah, James. That was the goal.”
“Wait,” James stirs, taken aback a little, “I thought the goal was just to make me forgive you, not to make me happy”
“The goal is always to make you happy”
Oh.
James blinked at him for a brief second, before he started walking again and laughed “You really are a softie, aren’t you?”
“I will bite off all of your fingers” Regulus hissed.
“You’d miss them”
“I still can’t believe you made me sing that second part” Regulus gritted through his teeth in an attempt to ignore him, but James doesn’t miss the way that Regulus ears grow just the tiniest bit more red.
“Do you want to know a secret?”
“Sure”
James grinned from one cheek to another “I already forgave you the second you sat down at the slytherin table.”
Regulus whipped around to stare at him, his gaze absolutely piercing.
“What!?” he yelped, and James burst into laughter like a Maniac.
Regulus wasnnot at all impressed with him, “Do not laugh at me! Why didn’t you say something? You held up that finger to show me I should sing more and then you’d take me back but- oh, you just wanted me to suffer, didn’t you?”
James continued to giggle, “Just a little bit”
Regulus swatted at his arm, unable to express his anger in words. Quite frankly, it was adorable. People would probably give him very odd looks if he ever described Regulus as something even close to adorable in front of them, but they just didn’t know Regulus the way James did.
Then, when they reached the staircase to the astronomy tower, Regulus finally stopped trying to attack James arm and whispered ever so quietly, as if the words could break once they left his mouth if they moved carelessly, “Do you want to know a secret?”
James nodded his head eagerly.
The little smile that Regulus wore during his performance earlier was on his lips again. “I like you better than Edgar Allan Poe.”
James absolutely exploded with laughter, so hard that his knees almost buckle and Regulus had to catch him when he doubled over, and tell him that it really wasn’t even that funny.
And then, because he really did like this boy more than any other Poet out there, wether they wrote gothic short stories or long winded romances, they kissed again, just the faintest whisper of a sonnet, the slightest note of a song brushing against each other as if it weren’t anything forbidden at all.
James liked to think it wasn’t.