Regulus was upset and went to the library for some peace and quiet, the book he was reading was boring in its perspective but still interesting enough to keep his mind occupied for the time being. He barely even noticed James approaching him until he was sitting down next to him on the ratty red sofa that was still sort of plush to the touch.
“Hi, my love how are you,” James asked, a little muffled as he was pressing a kiss to the top of Regulus’s head.
Regulus snapped, “I’m fine James.” James' face screwed up a little at that, concern etching his features. Regulus’s eyes softened “I’m a little tired but nothing, a little sleep won’t fix. Don’t worry.” Reg, reassured him, cursing himself a little for going off at Jame like that when he just had a bad day. He received an owl from his mother Walburga. Whenever a letter is sent from the Black household everything goes to shit. Well, except from when they are from Sirius of course, but that was to be expected since most of his letters are for warnings from pranks that were going to happen during the week, or perhaps even later that day.
“Reg? Darling where did you go?” James whispered quietly, trying not to startle Regulus.
His eyebrows furrowed. He hasn't moved since James got here. “What are you talking about? I didn't go anywhere.” Did he say something he wasn't supposed to? He didn't think he did but maybe he was wrong. Did he say something about the letter already?
“See, you just went there again.” James smiled slightly, mood still slightly dimmed as he knew that regulus was not doing good right now, but still happy that he found something he didn't know about his reg before.
“Hmm I guess I did.” Regulus quickly agreed, desperately wanting to change the subject.
“Regulus.” James spoke patiently. “I know you probably don't want to talk about what is making you upset, but if you tell me I can at least try to make you feel better.” He reasoned.
They sat there in silence for a little while, at some point Jame reached over and started stroking one of the hairs closest to Regulus's ear.
“My mother sent me a letter.” He somehow managed to choke out through the lump in his throat, yet his tone was more neutral than you would think, he was beginning to close himself off. And as much as Reg would love to just get up off of the sofa that was in the library in a small nook ( reggies own secret reading spot as Sirius liked to call it ) he made a promise to himself that he would try, for James.
“Oh.” James breathed out, his shock more apparent than he would have liked, if the look on his face was anything to go by. Quickly, James got his wits together and motioned for his Regulus to carry on.
“Uhm,” Regulus croaked out, his voice getting a little watery. James’s face crumpled at that, but he stayed quiet for regs' benefit. “She talked about the dark lord, and this coming summer… I’ve been chosen by him. She has arranged for a meeting with him where I will swear allegiance and be given the mark.” Regulus finished, his eyes had progressively teared up more and more throughout his whole sort of speech. Now he was just quietly crying. He can’t look up and see the disgust on James' face. He can’t lose the one good thing in his life. He can’t lose the most important thing in his life. He can’t lose James.
“Hey, shhh. It’s going to be okay. We will figure something out. Come here?” James’s voice trembled more with each word he said. His life was torn. Death Eaters were horrible, cruel people. But Regulus? His Regulus? Well he was the best person in the world, he was proud, ambitious, strong, and positively gorgeous. He could never do something that bad.
After hearing Jame’s words he promptly fell into his arms, holding onto James so tight you would think he would never let go. He didn't even want to ever let go. Sobs erupted out of his mouth as soon as James wrapped his arms around him. He was still here, he's not disgusted. A wave of relief hit him as well as so, so much else. He was a monster, why did he stay? Why didn't he leave? His cries wracked through him. He was choking on his own breathe as he forced it into his lungs. His breathing was getting shallower, he started to see black dots cross his vision. His chest hurt. A steady hand on his forearm assured him that he wasn't alone, that there was somebody there.
Breathe in
2,
3,
4 ,
Breathe out,
2,
3,
4,
Slowly Regulus came to the realisation that the voice in his head wasn't him nor in his head at all. It was James.
“We are breathing. Okay? Breathe in 2, 3, 4. Breathe out 2, 3, 4.” James told him repeating this over and over again. Sure enough, Regulus’s breathing slowed down, and eventually his vision came back. “We are going to sort this out, okay? Get the mark, don’t get the mark, Either way i still love you and while I dont support the Death Eaters : as a lot of them are evil and do cruel despicable things. What I mean is, I still love you either way and while I might not understand your decision I do trust your judgement so if you say you have to take the mark then you do. And if you don’t then well you don’t and you can come live with me and Sirius at my house. Even then it's only if you want to. You have choices, Regulus, please dont believe that you don’t, because you really do. I love you.”James rambled anxiously. But was cut off when he felt a soft press of lips against his. It was a small rather fleeting kiss but with no doubt one of the best they have shared.
“Merlin, I love you so much James.” Regulus confessed rather softly after he pulled away. He cuddled more into James' side and got comfortable. James glanced out the window after he repositioned himself to fit Regulus. They melted into each other perfectly, like they were always meant to be here, together. It was getting late and both boys were exhausted from the emotional conversation.
Above Reglus, he could hear James’s breathing even out and looked up to see that his eyes were closed, his eyes still a little blotchy and his stubble poking out a little in a few places James missed while shaving, but even then he was angelic. Regulus had one last thought before he drifted off, before he met James in sleep.
They were going to be okay.