THIRD PERSON
"Should I rent an airbnb na lang?" Celeste asks her friends. She was assigned to work back to the Philippines for at least a month. Dalawang taon na syang naninirahan sa Japan as it is what her job demands and also, because it is what she wanted. Far from everything that belongs to her past, far away from her.
"That'll be hard. May papayag kayang airbnb na mag stay ka ng isang buwan around the Metro? And don't you think it's also gonna be unsafe kasi hindi lang ikaw may access dun? I mean, we've got to think about the worst possibilities." Gab says.
"Seems like it's her last choice kasi, alangan naman mag uwian sya. Eh sa Bicol family nya, right?" Mave said.
"Wait lang. What if dun sa dating unit mo?" Jeya said. Her friends threw a sharp glare at her. "What? I'm just trying to give out possible solutions. For one it's familiar and comfortable, accessible and she have a key, 'di ba? Edi pwede nyang gamitin."
"Actually.. your suggestion is not so bad." Celeste spoke.
"Eh paano kung nandun pa sya?" Tanong naman ni Gab.
"I doubt."
"But if she's really there? What would you do?" Mave asked.
"Matagal na yung amin and we are mature enough to handle this. Kaming dalawa naman bumili nun. Might as well benefit from it also." Celeste said. But deep inside, if ever Art was still there, she wants to confirm one thing.
Masaya kaya sya?
"So you've decided. Dun ka na tutuloy?" Jeya asked. Celeste nods.
"Best bet ko ngayon gawa ng biglaan din naman yung order."
"Well, good luck to you."
-
Celeste almost forgot how it felt walking in this same road she walked out of more than two years ago. In fact, it was the last time she was ever there. Ni hindi nya binalikan ang mga gamit nya. She just.. left. After their break up, she decided to take the work opportunity she have been wanting to take. Simula noon, she focused on her career. After fulfilling her goals, it still felt empty, somehow. With a sigh, Celeste took the key from her pocket, then she opened the door. It was broad daylight, kaya kung dito pa rin nakatira si Art, she was still expecting the place to be empty. Her eyes wandered around the place, a wave of nostalgia coursing to her.
Tatlong taong memorya kasama ang babaeng pinakamamahal nya. A relationship she never thought would end just like this.
Dalawang taon na, yet the pain felt the same as it was two years ago. Sure she have distracted herself, but she knew deep inside she never actually moved forward.
"AHHHHH!" She heard a familiar voice and the next thing she knew, a huge stapler was coming towards her, hitting her head making her fall to the ground. The woman rushes towards her, yet she failed to recognize as her vision went into a blur. "Oh my god Celeste is that you? Celeste wake up!"
Celeste wakes up, her head still aching. Hinawakan nya ito but she found that it was already bandaged up. The room was.. familiar. The same shade when she left, but it now felt empty. Dati, puno ito ng litrato. Full of Celeste and Art's photo since they first met, all kept as a memory. It was now gone. Bumukas ang pinto, Art enters.
"I'm so sorry nasaktan kita. I was just used to being alone and.. I never expected you to be here again." Art chuckles awkwardly, trying to ease the tension hanging in the air.
"No problem. It is also my fault for barging in here without a word with you." Sambit ni Celeste. She stood up. "Don't worry, isang buwan lang ako dito. Aalis din ako."
"Stay as long as you want. After all, sayo din naman 'to."
"I'm based in Japan. May project lang na kaylangan ako ang mag head that's why I'm here temporarily."
"Oh. Sa Japan ka na pala."
Kaya pala hindi kita magawang mahanap.Lumayo ka na pala.
"Nasaan pala mga gamit ko?" Celeste said, wanting to change the conversation.
"Nandun sa kabilang kwarto. I prepared it already, gamitin mo na." Art told her.
“Ohh.Thank you, then. I appreciate it." Celeste stood up, leaving the room. Art sighs to herself. It was hard to act. Ang tagal nyang hinintay na makitang muli si Celeste, yet the moment she saw her once again, she messed it up.
”Bahala na si Darna.”
1st week
Celeste's first week was full of awkwardness. They would exchange a short hi and hello, but other than that they were totally not talking. Celeste was so busy; she would get up early dahil kaylangan pang bumyahe. Art was observing her silently. Hindi na nakakapag almusal, uuwi but Celeste would usually cook something instant or eat some canned goods. Art was getting worried. Wala ng pahinga si Celeste, she can't help but to care for her. Art, now standing in front of the stove with food she cooked more than enough for her, she worries that Celeste would decline her offer.
"Bahala na nga." Celeste was still out at work, so Art prepares the food and leaves it on the table with a note before going to bed. After long hours of exhausting work, she arrives home. She expected to cook some instant food but then, she noticed the food prepared on the table with a little note.
Nasobrahan ako ng luto, so I thought of sharing it to you kesa masayang. Eat well.
- Art
Gutom na din naman sya and besides, si Art na din naman nag effort, sasayangin nya pa ba? So she ate it. She closes her eyes, savoring the taste. Being a busy person had deprived her of the effort to cook for herself. And one more thing, she missed this. She missed her. But it’s not something she’ll openly admit, of course. She sighs to herself.
I miss her, yet I’m too scared to tell her that.
-
Finally, it was sunday. The only free day Celeste has. She decided to spend it watching something on the television. Nakakulong lang naman kasi si Art sa kwarto nya. But when it was lunchtime, Art came out of her room, heading to the kitchen. She cooks food for the both of them.
“Napa sobra ulit luto ko. Mind having it?” She asked.
“No problem.” Celeste replied, as it favors her. Art had a small smile on her face.
“Wala namang problema sayo?” She asked cautiously. Celeste nods.
“Okay lang.” Art nodded.
“Alright.”
2nd week
Art had found a way to care for Celeste; by cooking for her. For the next few days she intentionally cooks excessive food, to share with Celeste. Seeing this occurrence repetitively, she knew it was no coincidence anymore. One night, she got to go home early. The aroma of the food in the kitchen invites her. Naglakad sya patungo dun. She found Art, still in her work clothes in an apron. She was humming and singing, seemingly happy as she cooks. Celeste found herself smiling as she watched Art.
I missed her so much. She tells herself.
Actually, she can’t remember when was the last time she saw her happy. Back then, Art always looked exhausted, sad as if she forgot how it’s like to be happy. Siguro nga, in the last years of their relationship, she failed to see how Art was also consumed yet she was just focused on herself.
“Tititig ka na lang?” Art asks as she closes the stove to face Celeste. She was caught off guard.
“Sorry.”
“Oo na. Sinasadya kong magpasobra magluto because, I care for you.” Art said. Celeste chuckles.
“Nababasa mo ba utak ko? I was just about to ask.”
“Gusto mo ata magkasakit at puro instant kinakain mo. So I took the initiative. Seems like you know it naman.eh.”
“Well it favors me kaya hinayaan ko. Sorry.”
“Not a problem. I like doing it. I like taking care of you.”
Something I failed to do back then, dahil ikaw ang laging nag aalaga sa akin. Pwede pa ba akong bumawi, Celeste?
“You.. you seem so happy.” Celeste blurted out.
“I am. I am happy. Kasi nandito ka na ulit.” Celeste laughed.
“Talaga? Nambobola ka lang eh.” Sambit nya. Art smiles.
“Oo nga, na miss kita eh.” Art says, as it was the truth. Napalunok na lang si Celeste, not knowing what to say. Art chuckles. “You seem hungry. Tara na dito, kain ka na.” Celeste smiles a bit.
“Alright.”
-
Another sunday. That one day Celeste can rest. It was evening, Celeste and Art just finished dinner together. Celeste took on the washing of the dishes. After she’s done, she plops on the couch and plays some movie as her rest of the day. Ikinagulat nya ng bigla syang tabihan ni Art. But she just shrugged. After all, this week had warmed them up to each other. Strangely enough, the two were able to act comfortably around each other after what happened between the two of them.
“Paupo ha.” She says, which Celeste only nods at. As if it was meant, the movie was about two lovers who eventually fell out of love inside their marriage. The once loving family turned cold and full of arguments. It felt too familiar.
“Parang tayo.” Celeste thought, yet she voiced it out loudly kaya napatakip na lang sya sa bibig nya. Art could only chuckle to ease the situation.
“Wag ka na mahiya. Totoo naman eh.” Sambit naman ni Art. “You know I’m thinking, kung hindi kaya tayo nag hiwalay, nasaan na kaya tayo ngayon?” Celeste did not speak. Art panicked, thinking that she made her uncomfortable. “Oh sorry I shouldn’t-”
“We will still be apart.” Celeste said.
“What?”
“Kung hindi tayo naghiwalay that exact moment, we will probably break up on a different day or a different month. Pagbali baliktarin man natin ang mundo, we’re meant to be apart.” Celeste said. “We became too damaging to each other. We’re just each other’s additional stress than the peace and comfort we used to be. Kaya in any other way, we will still just.. grow out of it.”
“We needed to grow separately.” Art spoke.
“It worked, didn’t it? Now we’re able to talk casually. Kaylangan lang natin maghilom.” Celeste said. Art nodded in agreement.
“We needed that time and healing.” Art added. A comfortable silence settles between them but behind those silent nods and smiles, a question lingers in the air.
Ngayong pwede na, pwede pa ba ulit?
3rd week
The third week was comfortable, yet filled with unspoken feelings for each other. The sneaky stares, the shared smiles, both of them knew they wanted to say something, but no one dared to say anything. Mas maaga ng nakakauwi si Celeste these past few days, as she’s getting the hang of the job she took. But surprisingly, it was past 8 pm yet Celeste had not yet arrived. Art was a bit nervous so she decided to contact her with the new number she gave. The phone rang once, then twice. Art’s chest was pounding hard. Then finally, an answer.
“Hello? Napatawag ka?” It was Celeste’s voice. She breathed a sigh of relief.
“Sorry, I was just worried. You’re usually back before seven.”
“Oh sorry, I had to stay kasi kinausap ko pa yung foreman since patapos na din yung project. Hindi bale, pabalik na din ako ng Manila. Nag car taxi na lang ako.”
“Good, kinabahan lang ako kasi wala ka pa.”
“I’ll send you the car details. Don’t be worried, I’ll be okay.” Somehow Celeste's words felt heavy when it supposed to make her feel at ease.
“Please do that.”
“I just sent it. Don’t worry, pauwi na ako. Good bye, Art.”
“Bye. Mag ingat ka.” Art turns the call off, yet she still feels uneasy. To ease the feeling, she turns the TV on to watch some television. A while later, the midnight news comesin.
“Breaking news! Sasakyan, tumilapon sa may kahabaan ng C-6 expressway matapos itong sumalpok sa isang bus! Isang babae ang kumpirmadong patay habang ang driver ay naisugod sa ospital.” Intently observing the photos shown, Art’s heart raced, she felt dizzy all of a sudden, so she sat.
Same car model, same color and the first plate number.. oh god. She would have just been there..
She called Celeste but she received no answer. Walang kahit anong sagot. Lumakas pa ang kabog ng dibdib nya. It’s been an hour without Celeste’s response. Halos maluha luha na sya, she can’t lose her again.
“No Celeste please.” She cried. Then the door creaked.
“Art. why are you on the floor? Why are you crying?” The gentle voice made her look up. It was the woman she was waiting for.
“B-Bakit hindi ka nasagot sa tawag? Bakit late ka na? Ang tagal mo.” Art bombarded her with questions. Although confused, Celeste still answered.
“Na dead batt ako. Tapos since nadelay ako puntahan yung place of pick up drinop ako nung driver. I had to book another one-” Art hugged her tight, cutting her off. Then, she sobbed.
“A-Akala ko napano ka na.. a-akala ko wala k.. ka na.. I was scared..” Another flash report appears on the television.
“Biktima ng insidente sa C-6 expressway, nakilala na! Ang driver ng naturang sasakyan..” Celeste’s eyes widened. Yun ang sasakyan na dapat sya ang pasahero. It could have been her in that car. But thankfully Art called her, delaying her ride kaya na cancel sya ng rider.
It was Art’s call that saved her.
“You saved me..” She whispered.
“I don’t want to lose you. Losing you once was enough. But losing you forever.. it is something I could never imagine.” Art whispered. Ang mga salitang binitawan nya ay kumurot sa puso ni Celeste. She's never seen her devastated. Kaya nga ng iwan nya ito, tumalikod lang sya at umalis. But this time, she could never turn her back on her ever again.
-
After calming Art down, Celeste found herself in the bed they once shared with Art snuggled to her. For exes, it would have been awkward. But for them, it wa different.
“The thought of losing you forever made me think. Hindi ko kaya, Cel. Hindi ko kayang mabuhay sa mundong wala ka at mas hindi ko kayang wala ka sa tabi ko. Can you please give me one more chance? Pag usapan natin. I know it’ll be hard to figure it all out-”
“Then let’s figure it out together, okay?” Celeste said.
“Is.. is that a yes?” Art asked. Celeste chuckled.
“It is. Now rest, my love. We will figure out how to love again together, okay?” Art smiles.
“Alright. Let’s figure this out together.”