1975, june, Gryffindor common room
They won the quidditch match, so naturally, there was a legendary Gryffindor party where Sirius was currently sitting. The marauders were hanging out with Regulus and his friends, a bit separated from the others, who were dancing and drinking more than they should.
Barty was sitting in Evan’s lap, sharing a smoke - which Regulus found quite disgusting - while Regulus was sitting on the couch between Pandora and Sirius. Marlene was laying next to Dorcas, with her legs across Dorcas’s lap. James was leaning back against Sirius’s legs, and Peter was resting his head on James's thighs facing towards the pair smoking. Lily and Mary sat down next to Pandora on the couch, the redhead resting her head against the blonde’s shoulder. Mary was painting her nails, and Remus was sitting in front of Sirius in the armchair.
Suddenly Sirius started speaking “Let’s play a game!!” - He didn't know what he was getting himself into.
“What kind of game?” Marlene asked, raising her brows.
“What about Truth or Dare?” Said Pandora while stroking Lily's hair.
“Why don't we make it a little more exciting? We should use veritaserum” Said Lily already leaving the room for said potions.
Remus was fidgeting with the hem of his shirt, not wanting to participate in the potion part of the game. He didn’t want to expose himself by any means. But this couldn’t go unnoticed by Sirius, who was more than familiar with every tiny movement and reaction of Remus’s.
When Lily returned she already had the glasses and the potion.
She gave everyone a glass, and filled it with fire whiskey, and then added a drop of veritaserum. She purposely avoided the glass that belonged to Remus.
“Bottoms up!” said Barty before downing his shot.
Everyone followed his lead.
“Alright, I start!” James chimed in excitedly, glancing at Peter before asking him “Pete, truth or dare?”
Peter gulped nervously before answering “Truth”
A smile was already tugging at the corners of James’s mouth. “Okay, well, you've been awfully quiet lately about your love life, so what's going on there?”
Peter’s face went suddenly pale. Either from the question or because he also drank too much, no one could tell at first.
“That’s because I’m dating someones. I have been dating them for a while, actually.” Said Peter, and he slapped his hand over his mouth right after as he realized what he said.
Everyone's jaw dropped, except for two people, who were smiling reassuringly at their boyfriend.
Marlene sat upright like a vampire waking up, and was the first to break the silence after a few seconds, by asking “WHO?”
Peter's answer was muffled by the hand on his lips, so no one heard the names he said.
The fiery blonde abruptly grabbed Peter's hands, pulling them away from his mouth. “WHO?”
“STOP ACTING LIKE AN OWL” Shouted James.
“FUCK OFF, POTTER” Shouted back Marlene.
“Answer, Pettigrew” Marls lowered her voice.
“Crouch and Rosier” replied Peter, and suddenly everyone went quiet.
“WHAT?” Yelled Sirius as he looked towards the smoking - hot - couple, pointing at them, while he tried to take the information in.
“What? Is there a problem, Black?” asked Evan, smirking at him.
“Yes!!! He didn't tell us that he was fucking slytherins, that's the problem!!!” Said Sirius.
“Actually, it's the other way around” Said Barty, as he slid off of Evan’s lap and walked over to Peter, pulling him up, and then walking back to Evan. Rosier slid his hands around their waists and pulled them both on his lap.
Peter was red as a tomato, and Barty was having the time of his life. While Evan felt like the luckiest man alive as he glanced up at his boyfriends, both sitting on him comfortably.
Mary cheered, and Remus followed her with an amused whistle.
“Is anyone else getting fucked by slytherins?” Asked Sirius outragedly.
“The other way around” Regulus muttered under his breath.
“What was that?” Asked Sirius as he turned towards his little brother.
“Nothing you should concern yourself with.” Reggie replied, giving his brother a smile, that was obviously not sincere.
“Okay…..” Said Sirius, giving Regulus a suspicious glare.
“Alright, this is getting awkward, so, Peter, would you like to continue?” joined Dorcas.
“Uhm, sure. Sirius, truth or dare?” Asked Peter, secretly expecting a dare.
“Dare, I’m not a coward!” Said Sirius with a proud grin.
“Alright, I dare you to describe your type, in detail.” Said Peter, with a plan in mind.
“That's it? If I didn't know that you have boyfriends, I'd suspect that you are trying to get into my pants Pete.” Said Sirius playfully.
“Don’t flatter yourself” Peter rolled his eyes.
“So my type, huh? Well, I actually fancy quiet people. You know? Smarter than me-”
“That’s not hard” Marlene cut in.
“Shut up. As I was saying, I like them tall, lanky, and mysterious… and I like it when they smell nice. Sweet but a bit spicy?”
“That sounds awfully like someone” Whispered Mary to Lily as they giggled over their friend’s stupidity.
Remus subconsciously started to compare himself to Sirius’s type. His heart started beating a bit faster as he realized that the description fit him perfectly. He stared at Sirius, silently begging for answers.
“Okay Black, ask someone” Said Evan as he traced patterns into his boyfriends’ waists.
Sirius looked around, contemplating who to ask. His eyes landed on Remus, on the armchair as he tried to avoid his gaze, in hopes that he would not get picked.
“Remus, truth or dare?” Asked Sirius as a smirk slowly lit up his whole face.
“Dare.” Remus didn’t want to face any awkward, personal questions. Sirius was like a child on a sugar rush when it came to truth or dare. He knew no mercy.
“I would like to dare you to… kiss the most attractive, pretty, hot, breathtaking person in the room!”
“James’s mom is not in the room” chimed in Marlene, earning a glare from her girlfriend.
Remus froze for a moment, before he successfully gained back his confidence and did something that could very well change his life.
And then Remus Lupin just got up from the armchair and walked over to the couch. As James noticed what was happening, he quickly moved away, hiding his smile, so Remus could pull Sirius up by his wrists. The raven haired boy was so caught off guard he forgot how to breathe for a second, yet his arms quickly wrapped around the taller boy’s neck. Remus wrapped one of his arms around Sirius’s waist, and lifted the other one to gently cradle Sirius's jaw. Sirius unconsciously looked at Remus's lips, and that was when he realized that Remus's lips were getting closer to him. His eyes widened, but his mind went completely blank as he realized what was about to happen.
And then he felt it.
Remus's lips were on his own.
His brain took a few seconds to process everything, but as soon as it did, his eyes fluttered shut and he let Remus lead him.
Sirius
Who would’ve thought that a man like Remus Lupin, a werewolf, like Remus Lupin could be such a gentle kisser? Sirius have shared amazing kisses with amazing people, and still, none of those felt like the one he shared with Remus. It felt sweet, warm and every single time the realization hit him he felt shivers running down his spine, leaving every inch of his body tingling. His knees were weaker than ever. He wanted Remus to pull him closer and to never let him go. And as soon as he felt Remus slowly breaking their kiss he pulled him back, which Remus didn’t seem to mind. Yet the strangest thing was that Sirius didn’t feel the urge to stick his tongue down Remus’s throat. It was sweet like no other kiss he had before. He didn’t want to ruin such a peaceful and lovely moment by trying to devour him. He definitely wouldn't mind if Remus tried tho, he would even welcome it. Suddenly he felt Remus bite his lip, and he was gone. Done and dead for. He felt as if his whole body was on fire, tingling everywhere. Death by Remus Lupin and his bloody brilliant kiss.
“You two done yet?” asked Peter.
“You’re just jealous. They’re so sweet” commented James.
“You were dared for a kiss not an entire make out session.” Said Marlene.
Sirius, on the other hand, didn't hear any of this as he was too focused on Remus. He didn’t even want to let go of his neck yet, but Remus slowly pulled away. So he had to. Sirius knew that he probably looked like a love sick fool by the way he looked at Remus. All star eyed and red in the cheeks, but he couldn't help it. He just received the best kiss of his life by his best friend. Who wouldn't be so lovestruck?
Remus refused to look at him, and that broke Sirius’s heart. He didn't know why though. It felt so strange. Did Remus actually hate that kiss? Was Sirius not a good kisser? Then why did Remus bite his lip? Was Sirius being too much?
He wanted to rip his hair out. His own. Or maybe Remus’s too. In a different context.
“AWKWARD” yelled Marlene, actually almost scaring the living shit out of everyone.
Sirius averted his eyes away from Remus and slowly untangled himself from the other boy. He sat back on the couch as he watched Remus walk back to his armchair and take his seat again.
Remus cleared his throat and spoke “Marls, truth or dare” he asked Marlene.
“Truth” Answered Marlene, surprising everyone with her choice.
“How did you realize you were in love with Dorcas?” Remus asked the blonde curiously.
“Well, at first it was merely attraction. I loved her hands, face, and everything about her, really. I couldn't take my eyes off of her for more than 5 minutes. Then I found myself always looking for her first when I stepped into a room, and eventually I found myself recognizing her perfume, her steps, her voice, I memorized her choice of words, her favorite words… After a while I noticed that it was the smallest things I fell for. How she likes it when the tip of her quill is touching her lips, her smile lines, how she always checks her drink just in case some bug flew into it. Oh, and how she doesn’t kill any type of insects. It doesn’t matter what it is, she takes it outside. And she always matches her nails with my hair. I don’t know if it was intentional or anything, but the first time was when I got pink streaks and she had like french tips and they were pink. I teased her about it and she said she will cut my hair off in my sleep. I love her.” Marlene sighed, cuddling up to her girlfriend, who smiled the entire time.
It was difficult for Sirius to focus on everything that Marlene said, as it looked like he left half his brain back in Remus's mouth and arms. But what she said sounded awfully familiar. He felt a pang of jealousy in his heart and stomach. He wanted Remus to notice things like that about him too. ‘Cause he did. He knew everything about Remus. His taste when it came to chocolate and drinks, his favorite rinse aid, how he smiled whenever he saw… Sirius. And how he tried to hide it every single time. He also studied Remus’s freckles. Merlin, he even had a favorite one. The one next to the scar that layed across his nose. He often found himself wishing he could trace every scar on Remus’s body with the tip of his finger in the most gentle way possible. He felt helpless whenever he saw that Remus was in pain on a full moon, he never got used to it, he never could. He couldn’t stand the sight of Moony in such agony. His Moon-
Oh
Oh
He was in love with Remus.
Oh fuck
Sirius blushed at the realization. It made sense in his head. It definitely made sense. Suddenly everything made so much sense. How could he be so goddamn stupid? Of course he would fall in love with his best friend. That's just his luck, isn't it? But how could he tell Moony that he was in love with him? Or should he not tell?
“Sirius”
What if Remus wasn’t reciprocating his feelings and it would ruin their relationship and their whole friend group? He was spiraling. He had to tell someone that wasn’t Remus. Or Peter. He was too happy in his relationship to understand Sirius’s angst.
“Sirius”
He should tell James! But James was single. He has never had a serious- sirius relationship. He never told anyone about a crush he had or someone he was in love with. But James was his brother. He had to tell him. He was the only person who could help him.
“Sirius!”
Sirius flinched at a firm sound next to his ear, and he looked up to see everyone looking at him. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion until he looked at James, who was the one who shouted in his ear.
“What?” Sirius asked the boy next to him.
“Are you okay? You’re blushing, like it’s actually concerning.” James replied.
“Actually- could I borrow you for a second?” Sirius asked nervously.
James raised an eyebrow but agreed, so they made their way out of the common room, up to their dorm. They sat down on Sirius’s bed, and waited quietly until Sirius felt ready to tell James everything. James was thankfully smart enough to cast a silencing spell before he let Sirius speak.
“I’m in love with Moony!” he blurted out.
“You what?” James asked with a confused tone.
“In love, with Moony, still with me?” Sirius asked.
“Yes, just…. Shocked, that's all” James gave him a reassuring smile. “So, how did you figure that one out, huh?”
“Well, it just happened like a few minutes ago, and I’m terrified. How- I need to find out if he loves me too! Help me, Prongs! I know you’ve never really been in a situation like this but-” Sirius started rambling.
“How would you know if I've been in a situation like this?” James asked.
“You’d tell your favorite person about it, no?” Sirius raised his eyebrows, not understanding the logic behind James’s thinking. How could he not tell Sirius something important?
James quickly covered his mouth before he could say anything because of the veritaserum in his system. He nodded, hoping that Sirius wouldn’t question it.
“So in love with Moony, huh? That’s a new development” He smiled teasingly.
“Oh, yeah, Moony. So… Should I tell him? Or should I wait for signs? But what if he’s waiting for my signs? This is so ugh! Agitating! Agonizing! Prongs, I hate this so much, why did I have to realize this? Why did I have to do this to myself? I mean, I asked Moony to kiss me- ME. HE KISSED ME! HE THINKS I’M THE MOST ATTRACTIVE AND BEAUTIFUL PERSON IN THE ROOM!”
“Sirius, calm down!!! You're gonna break the bloody spell!!” Warned James as he listened to Sirius’s speech. “Moony would be a fool not to like you back. I mean, have you looked at yourself? You're gorgeous Sirius, and you're his best friend, even if he didn't like you back, he would still want to be your best friend.” Said James.
“But that would make so many things awkward. Like… I couldn’t cuddle with him or anything. But… if that would happen. If he rejected me, he wouldn't kiss me again. And I want him to kiss me again. Merlin, he could fuck me. Anytime.” Sirius sighed dramatically.
“Godric, I didn't know you were a bottom”
“Prongs, look at me. Look at this body. It would be such a shame not to… you know, use it? Take full advantage of it? “
“I’m sure Remus would be happy to do just that” James winked at Sirius.
“Should I just ask him to fuck me? Maybe if I tell him I love him and he doesn’t say it back I could say it was just an accident ‘cause he’s so good?” he wondered.
“Yep, don't do that” James said.
“But then what should I do? I can't just walk up to him and say ‘Hey Moony, you know I’m absolutely in love with you and I've been going crazy about the thought of you loving me back and blah blah blah’ I can't do that!! That would be idiotic!”
“That sounds like a sensible plan to me” Said James.
“It’s not, ughh, I should tell him some other time, when I’m not this confused, I don’t even know what would I do if he loved me too!! Like- would I kiss him? I don’t fucking know!” Sirius whined.
“Sirius-”
Remus
What the fuck
What the actual fuck
Remus had surely lost his mind
What was he thinking, just going up to Sirius and kissing him like that?
He sat back on his armchair, Marlene was talking about her relationship with Dorcas but Remus could not take his eyes off of Sirius.
His lips were slightly more pink and puffed, and he was blushing like crazy, likely lost in his own thoughts. He was beautiful.
It was common knowledge that Sirius Black was gorgeous. You just have to look at him to notice that. To notice that he has the perfect black, curly, long hair that was smoother and softer than anything you could imagine. That he had the most perfect grey eyes that anyone could get lost in if they looked for too long. The way he spoke was also magnificent, he had a way with words that just pulled everyone in. His face was like porcelain, perfect and flawless. And his body was just pure perfection. He was truly blessed by Aphrodite.
But it was his personality that made him so special in Remus's eye. Sirius Black was the most caring person you could ever meet. He always looked out for his friends and the ones he loved. He was also very kind, and sweet, and funny, he was very funny, to the extent that he was capable of making Remus laugh even on the full moons, on the worst days of his life. On the days that he felt like a monster, Sirius could still make him smile and laugh and make him believe that he was, in fact, not a monster. He was something else. He was everything Remus could ever ask for and more.
He was beauty itself. Inside and out.
Inside. Sirius’s soul was pure. Even the abuse he experienced during his childhood couldn’t taint it. Yes, he was mischievous, he was up to no good, he adored pranking everyone and he could be a chaotic mess. But he was home for his friends. He was everything his parents weren’t.
When he snapped out of whatever that was, it was to James screaming into Sirius’s ear.
Sirius finally came back to himself and he asked James to talk. What could that be about, Remus wondered.
Maybe he could use a good talk too. With Regulus. Or Pandora. Or both of them, actually. It indeed was too big of a deal, to be fair.
“Hey Reg, Dora can we talk?” Remus asked them as he stood up and made his way over to the other side of the common room.
Regulus and Pandora stood to follow Remus to the other side of the common room and made themselves comfortable on the armchairs that were put there.
“How to tell an idiot that you like them?” Asked Remus.
“Is this about my brother?” Asked Regulus with a slightly bored tone. “And don't you dare lie to me.”
“Maybe it is. How to tell him clearly? I want to make sure he understands it, I don’t want to be cheesy but he seems to be the type who enjoys that.” he rubbed the bridge of his nose.
“Regulus probably won’t be that useful in this situation. But maybe I could try to figure out if he at least likes you back. Just to clarify, it is Sirius, right?” Pandora looked into Remus’s eyes, which honestly scared the boy a little. There was something so off-putting, yet kind in her eyes that Remus couldn’t wrap his brain around. Pandora was a strange, strange person.
“Yeah, it’s him” Remus clarified.
Pandora nodded, already thinking of some plans. She knew she had to be careful if she wanted to find out if Sirius actually felt the same way.
But then Regulus spoke again.
“I could just ask him, you know? I mean he’s probably asking James the same question, he’s so easy to read ever since he was a child.”
“He is still a child, Regulus.” Remus sighed.
Regulus rolled his eyes. “I know, Remus. Mentally he is, for sure a child, but that doesn't mean that you have to suffer because he's annoyingly oblivious.”
But at that exact moment they heard some thumping from the direction of the others. It was Marlene who was rushing towards them.
“I was going to take a piss but I heard Sirius screaming and James saying something but they probably casted a silencing spell so it’s still muffled but yeah…” she rambled.
“That’s so disappointing in such an odd way. My brother almost broke a silencing spell just because he’s screaming. What would happen if he could actually get laid?” Regulus mumbled.
Remus smirked and gave a wink to Regulus “Don't worry I'll make sure you hear him next time”
“Remus, that's disgusting!” Said Regulus outragedly as he flung his hands in dramatic fashion.
Remus chuckled, and he knew there was no point in being separated from the others anymore. It was obvious that either Remus or Sirius had to make a move and Pandora, maybe even Regulus would help Remus find a way. Well, deep down Remus just hoped Sirius would be the first to give an obvious hint or actually confess.
1975, december, hogwarts
It has been 6 months. 6 months since he realized that he was in love with his best friend. And not a day has gone by where he didn't think about him 24/7. He and Remus decided to stay at hogwarts for the holidays since neither of them wanted to abuse the Potters’ hospitality.
So Sirius now had two weeks with Remus. Alone. Merlin, how is he going to survive this without James? His wingman. James was the reason that Sirius hasn't told Remus anything yet. Because he thankfully stopped Sirius from confessing to Remus at the wrong time and place. Even when Sirius was convinced, because Regulus and Pandora actively tried to get him to tell Remus everything.
James and Sirius agreed that he was going to confess during the Christmas holidays and when James will come back, they will be a couple.
Well, easier said than done.
Sirius has been a nervous wreck whenever he was beside Remus for the past six months. He kept blushing, which was very annoying, and something he never did. But around Remus? He couldn't help himself.
Currently Remus was reading a book, and Sirius was doing what he has been doing for these past few months. Staring at Remus.
Sirius had been too busy in his staring that he didn't notice when Remus turned his curious eyes on him. He tilted his head as if to say ‘what do you want’. It took everything in Sirius to stop himself from saying ‘you’.
Sirius shook his head, and gave Remus a smile made just for him. The sweetest of Sirius's smiles.
Remus gulped then looked away back to his book as if he was reading, but Sirius could see that his eyes were unfocused and there was a little pink tint on his cheeks.
He smiled to himself as he continued his task at staring at Remus. His favourite activity honestly.
Next to Remus, on the desk were their Christmas presents. James made it clear not to open them before Christmas or there will be consequences. What a mom.
He was planning on bringing the present down to the come and go room and then suprising Remus with dinner or something. After all, Remus deserves only the best.
A few hours later they were heading down for lunch. The corridors were almost empty, as almost every student went home for the holidays.
He and Remus walked closer than they usually do, and it made something flutter in Sirius's belly. Especially when the back of their hands brushed, and neither of them pulled away. Sirius blushed and stared at Remus. He knew that Remus was probably aware that he was staring but he could not care less. If Remus didn't want him to stare then he shouldn't look so bloody gorgeous.
Remus definitely was aware of the situation. He looked down to Sirius more often than ever and he didn't pull his hand away when Sirius tried to interlock their pinkies. Even if he didn't understand exactly why Sirius would want to do something like that. So suddenly.
Yeah, suddenly. He didn't want to do that for six months, no, definitely not.
They got to the great hall, and placed some food on their plate. It was really lovely, yet not exactly the romantic, ‘Oh it’s Christmas!!’ type of lunch. So Sirius decided to ask in the middle of their meal, “Moony, would you like to…do something more holiday-ish? We could make some hot chocolate, gingerbread, grab some candy canes, hot tea, anything, really. Just to get into the mood. We could also read some Christmas related tales. I really like The Little Match Girl.”
Remus was caught off guard, probably at seeing Sirius being so passionate about Christmas. But what could he do? Sirius loved Christmas. He loved the snow and all the love that filled the Potter’s house, and all the love that he felt at the moment.
“Sure, Pads” Remus smiled at him, and Sirius melted. He smiled back of course.
Smiling was becoming easier and easier. Genuine smiling.
They just got up and walked towards the seventh floor, because they discussed previouly that today they'll come down here to celebrate Christmas and open presents. They went into the room of requirement and there was a large sofa in the living room, a kitchen, a bedroom and a bathroom. Sirius was already attempting to create some hot chocolate for himself and make some tea for Remus. The taller boy was trying to find the book that Sirius mentioned before. He knew either one of the Black brothers had a copy, if not both of them.
Sirius didn't take as long as Remus thought he would, and he was genuinely surprised to see Sirius with two mugs in his pretty hands - covered in tattoos and rings - and he also surprised to see that Sirius managed to get chocolate all over his lips already.
Remus smiled at the older boy as he brought the tea that was made for Remus, over to him. He touched Sirius’s hand gently as he took the cup into his own hands. Sirius was happy to leave his hands there. Remus lifted his hand and wiped away the chocolate that was laying on Sirius's lips with his thumb, then he brought it to his lips, and licked it off, all while looking Sirius in the eye. The shorter boy blushed and broke eye contact. Remus smirked and he let Sirius's hands fall as he took a sip of his tea. Just how he liked it. Perfect.
Sirius was freaking out. Remus Lupin was holding his hands. His hands!!! And then he wiped away the chocolate that Sirius had on his mouth. And then he licked it off of his thumb. Sirius's mind went blank, and he became non-verbal for the next few minutes. It was an incredible example of wandless magic. His face was on fire.
“You okay, Pads?” Remus asked teasingly as if he had no idea what he just did. Cruel man.
“Oh, sure, yeah, perfectly okay.” he replied before walking past Remus, to get into the bedroom with his mug in his hands. His pretty, pretty hands.
Remus found the book and joined his best friend.
The bedroom was quite beautiful. It was big. The only thing was, that it had one bed. One large bed if he must say so, but still one bed.
“I won't sit on the floor. Nor sleep there.” Sirius clarified his wishes.
“Then we share. Because I would like to stay comfortable too.” Remus replied.
And Sirius agreed. He quickly made himself comfortable in the queen sized bed. Remus did the same. Suspiciously close to Sirius.
“Would you like me to read it for you?” Remus asked.
“Yes, please.” Sirius said quietly, sipping on his drink so he could avoid eye contact.
Remus opened the book and started reading. His voice was more than soothing. It wasn't too deep, it had such a nice rasp to it too. It made Sirius feel sleepy after ten minutes. He also finished his drink after a few minutes and snuggled closer to his beloved Moony.
Remus watched with amusement, and love in his eyes as the boy who he had been in love with for years, cuddled up to him. He played with Sirius's hair until he fell asleep, and even after that.
It was not a long time until Remus became sleepy too, and he fell asleep. It was the best sleep he's got in years.
When Sirius woke up he found himself not wanting to move. He was so close to Remus and he looked so peaceful sleeping with his face almost completely buried into Sirius's shoulder. Sirius took all his courage and decided to enjoy the moment even more by pressing the tiniest kiss ever against Remus's head.
Sirius felt like this was the day that he was supposed to tell Remus. He didn't know why, he just did. And so as he stared down at Remus he decided that he's gonna tell him. He needed some practice tho. And James wasn't here. So he started practicing out loud with his imaginary friend.
“Remus… Moony… Remus… Why is this so awkward and confusing?! Merlin, I wish Prongs was here and actually reply. Or, yeah, nah, he wouldn't be helpful, he would laugh. Fuck this, Moony, I wish I told you earlier that I think I've been in love with you for years at this point. I fell for you, if that wasn't clear enough. Well, I just hope you feel the same way about me. It's so weird, to be honest. I can't imagine your reaction, even though I'd love to, it'd make this whole thing easier and less painful, maybe, if I knew you didn't love me or anything. Nevermind, This really is a stupid idea. I hope you're not dreaming about me talking like a twelve year old.”
Sirius sighed, slowly rolling to his side so he could think. As he rolled over he noticed Remus smiling. He's not supposed to be smiling! Because after all, people who are asleep don't smile. So was Remus awake? How much did he hear? And why was he so silly now? He just smiled with his eyes closed!
Oh my god. OH MY GOD. Remus was awake. He was fucking awake. And he had the fucking audacity to smile. The bastard!
Sirius was freaking out. Did he hear everything? Sirius hoped he suddenly went deaf.
Sirius sat up and ran his fingers through his long, shiny hair. He thanked literally everyone who came to his mind for not letting him quote an actual vow that he wrote for an imaginary wedding when he was drunk. And in love.
“This is so messed up” he mumbled getting up and walking towards the door. He wanted to get some fresh air.
As he was about to leave the room Remus yelled at him “Wait!!”
Remus wanted to take his chance while he still had it. He didn’t want to let himself back down.
But before Sirius could turn around, Remus grabbed him by the waist and pulled him into his arms. His other hand lifted his face by his chin. “Remus, wha-” Sirius tried to ask Remus, but he interrupted him with a kiss.
Oh, again.
Sirius placed one of his hands on Remus's shoulder, and wrapped it around his neck. His other hand came up to frame his face like he was the most important thing in the world. He had to stand on his tiptoes to be able to reach Remus, seeing as his friend (boyfriend?!) was abnormally tall.
This time the kiss felt more intimate. Sirius didn’t feel the urge to bite him or to use his tongue. He didn’t feel like he had to take every opportunity Remus gave him, because deep down he knew there would be more. It was just as sweet as the one he received back when they played truth or dare. A part of that was for everyone. This was just for the two of them. This one was supposed to make Sirius realize Remus was madly in love with him. Well, Sirius was usually a bit slow, but Remus was patient.
After a few minutes Remus let go of Sirius’s slim waist. He has always liked how fragile Sirius’s body looked when he was either shirtless or wore something that showed at least a bit of his skin. And now that he was lucky enough to put his hands on him, he felt blessed. Even if it was just for a few minutes. After a few breaths, Sirius spoke.
“So… what are we?” He asked, looking at Remus, absolutely clueless, but hopeful.
“What do you want us to be?” Asked Remus anxiously.
“Well, I mean, I wouldn’t mind being your boyfriend, but we could be just friends, if you’d like. I don’t know, I haven’t seen you kissing your friends before, but if it’s like a welsh thing-”
“I can assure you Sirius, I’m not going around kissing my friends.” Said Remus.
“Oh, that’s a huge relief.” Sirius flashed a beaming smile. “So…..” Sirius trailed off for a moment, lost in his thoughts before he asked “So, you like me?” nervously.
“Merlin, Sirius, you’re so oblivious sometimes. You seriously still haven’t realized that I’m so utterly in love with you?”
Sirius gaped in shock at his best friend’s words. It took him a couple of seconds - maybe even a minute - to process Remus’s words. But he was sure about one thing. He adored how Remus said his name.
Was he really that dumb? How could he not notice something so important? It could’ve made everything so much easier.
“Well, the funny thing is, I’m also deeply in love with you.” Sirius confessed quietly.
“I know. I heard every single word. You know, it’s not nice that even while confessing your love, you mentioned James’s name.” he teased.
“Prongs will be at my wedding too. Get used to it.” Said Sirius, defending his actions.
“I hope that that wedding you’re talking about is gonna be ours.” Remus asked.
“Depends. Would you ask my father for my hand or Reggie? ‘Cause it would be foolish of you to go to my father, since he won’t give you his blessing anyway. Pure-blood stuff, you know. And given the fact that I'm not really liked over there doesn't help the situation.”
“I’d ask Regulus.” Remus answered simply.
“Fair enough. So, for how long have you been in love with me?” Sirius asked with a smug look.
“Well, it's quite embarrassing.” Remus rubbed the back of his neck nervously.
“Tell me, it can't be worse than mine.”
Remus frowned in confusion “Well, it started in fourth year, when I first saw you on the train.”
“Fourth year? Its been like 2 years Remus!!” Sirius's eyes widened.
“I told you it was embarrassing. Now tell me yours.” Said Remus, genuinely curious. (And not at all trying to change the subject, nooo.)
“And I told you that mine was worse. I think I’ve always loved you. I just hadn't realized it for a long, long time. I've realized in like june. And now I know that what I feel for you, is unlike anything I've ever felt. I love you, Remus Lupin. And I want you by my side.” Sirius confessed.
Remus had to kiss him for that. It was a quick kiss. A declaration of love. As Remus pulled away he said “I love you too, Sirius.”
“So, what are we? Boyfriends?” Sirius couldn’t stop grinning.
“Boyfriends. I would like that.” the taller boy replied, slowly reaching for the shorter one’s waist again, pulling him even closer.
Sirius blushed at his boyfriend's boldness. Yet he stood on his tip toes again, leaning in for a kiss. For their first kiss as boyfriends.
Remus was more than happy to obey.
1976, january, hogwarts
The holidays were over, the students had to travel back to Hogwarts, and while the whole friend group was eager to meet Sirius and Remus again, so they could catch up, the couple was freaking out. Well, Sirius was freaking out. Remus was trying to come up with ideas. They had to figure out how to tell the news.
Fortunately, James solved their problems without even knowing. As soon as the train arrived and the marauders finally reunited, James offered to grab something to drink and play something while sharing stories about who did what during the holidays. (Remus did Sirius, but that’s besides the point).
The others got there fairly quickly, and they greeted them individually.
Later in the common room, after everyone settled in, they decided to play a game. They agreed on truth or dare, because Peter accidentally left his cards at his mom’s house. Lily prepared the drinks and the veritaserum, and after their cups were emptied they started with James.
“Pads! Truth or dare?” He asked with a mischievous expression.
“Truth!” Sirius replied immediately, hoping his best mate would ask something safe.
“Who do you fancy?”
Sirius sent him a glare. James knew perfectly well who he fancied and he still asked that?!
“Remus.” He answered with a faint, pink tint on his cheeks, ignoring everyone's eyes. Including Remus's.
The room fell silent for a few seconds. Except for Marlene, who felt the urge to express her shock.
“WHAT? YOU FINALLY REALIZED? FUCK! I ALREADY LOST A BET AGAINST CAS. I’M GONNA LOSE ALL MY MONEY BECAUSE OF YOU.”
“That’s a shame. You can pay me later, love.” Dorcas winked at Marlene.
Sirius cleared his throat.
“So, uhm, Pete. Truth or dare?” Sirius asked, trying to change the subject.
“Dare.” He picked, a bit hesitant at first.
“Amazing. I dare you to tell me one of your kinks!” Sirius said curiously.
“Uhm, praising.” Peter turned a shade of scarlet.
“He looves edging, actually!” Barty spoke, not even trying to suppress his grin.
Evan elbowed Barty, even though he found the situation quite entertaining. Seeing their lover cover his cheeks from embarrassment.
“Pete!! You dog!!” Mary quipped.
“Uh, okay, I think I answered, so… I choose Remus. Truth or dare?” Said Peter, while he was still blushing like crazy.
“Dare.” Said Remus, as always. Lily didn’t give him any veritaserum, yet he still wanted to avoid sensitive topics.
“I dare you to… kiss someone you fancy. If you don’t fancy anyone, then-”
Remus didn’t even let Peter finish, he stood up from his favourite armchair, walking over to the sofa, where Sirius was sitting.
The shorter boy quickly got up, stepping onto Remus’s shoes, cradling his face before pulling him in for a kiss, which Remus reciprocated more than happily.
Even James was surprised. Did Sirius forget to update him? Their kiss looked natural. Like second breathing. Yeah, Sirius probably forgot to update him.
After a minute or two they separated and looked at their friends, their cheeks slightly red and their breathing a bit heavier.
“So, what happened while we were away?”
Pandora asked, but she sounded like she already knew.
“I got laid.” Sirius said proudly and winked at her. “If it wasn't obvious.”
“Pads! You gotta tell me everything later. But… I don’t know if I want to know everything about Moony.” James thought for a few seconds before continuing. “Tell me everything.”
“Everything?” Sirius wiggled his eyebrows, as he jokingly smirked at James.
“Sirius.” Remus sighed, and tightened his grip around Sirius's middle.
“You will tell Reggie everything too. Don’t be such a hypocrite!” Sirius glanced at his younger brother, before turning back to Remus.
“He will not. I have no interest in hearing such things about my brother. You may have that atrocious habit of yours, Sirius, but I do not.” Regulus said, while glaring at his brother.
“You already heard everything anyways” Barty said, looking at Regulus with a smug smile. “Your brother and Remus couldn’t show or tell you anything new.”
“After hearing you three… You might be right.” Reggie replied with a tired look in his eyes. He did not want to remember. “Although please, do use the silencing charm, I don't want to go deaf anytime soon.”
“What’s the fun in that?” Evan chimed in.
“It's going to be fun for you either way. I don't want in on that fun, thank you very much.” Regulus said.
“If you don't want Remus to talk about me, fine. But then I'll tell you about Remus.” Sirius chimed in.
“I don’t need you to share anything about him, Sirius. You couldn’t tell me anything I haven’t seen or experienced before.” he declared, leaving even Marlene speechless.
Silence.
Then a loud shriek.
“REGULUS ARCTURUS BLACK!”
“What? It's not like it was a secret.” Regulus said, his tone was one of pure boredom.
“MOONY!” Sirius looked at Remus, a glint of panic in his eyes.
“It really wasn’t. But I can assure you, we had nothing romantic going on.”
“Amazing. My brother fucked you. Nothing unusual or weird.”
Sirius threw his hands in the air, in a completely helpless manner, before dropping back to the sofa.
“Actually, it was the other way around, baby.” Remus said, hoping to catch Sirius off guard with the nickname, and for him to temporarily forget about his and Regulus's drama.
“What did you-” Sirius was way too surprised by the sudden use of a nickname from Remus.
Regulus smirked behind his tea.
Remus sat down on the armchair that he was sitting in until recently, and waved Sirius over. “Come on, baby, have a seat.” He gestured to his lap, then smirked as Sirius blushed, and started to walk over to him.
And Sirius melted. He didn’t care what happened between Remus and Regulus in the past anymore. He called him baby! In front of everyone. He stopped right in front of his boyfriend (it has been 2 weeks since they've got together, but he still couldn't believe it.) he was too flustered to do anything other than stare down as Remus looked up at him expectedly.
When it became obvious that Sirius isn't going to do anything, he wrapped his arm around his waist, and pulled him directly into his lap. Adjusting him until they were both comfortable. Sirius hid his crimson cheeks into Remus's neck, as his traitor of a boyfriend joined in on the laughter of their friends.
Sirius mumbled a quiet “i love you” into Remus's ear. Quiet enough to not let the others hear, but loud enough for Remus to hear.
Remus never felt this happy in his entire life. He had his friends and boyfriend right there with him. They were his family.
“I love you, too, sweetheart.”