Drowning
Lily and Willow reached the entrance to the final passage leading to the cavern floor as Remus emerged with a limp person slung over one shoulder.
“No time to stop and chat. We need to get out of here.” Remus said. Not even slightly out of breath Sirius noticed.
“Why can’t we just apparate?” Lily asked, puffing.
“Security.” Sirius answered. “Can apparate in or out of any Black owned building anywhere in the world.”
“If we are going to keep getting into these situation, I’m really going to need to learn to run.” Lily groaned and began to jog back the way they came.
‘She’s not wrong’ Willow thought, as Tara grabbed her hand and pulled her along. ‘Could be good bonding time too.’ She added cheerfully.
It took what felt like a lifetime to Lily and Willow to reach a level Remus declared was safe enough to rest.
“How will the others find us?” Lily asked when she finally got her breath back.
“Hotel.” Sirius answered with more confidence than he felt. “The three of us had an agreement to always meet at Potter manor if we ever got separated from our groups during the war. James will know to regroup at the hotel.”
“Makes sense,” Tara said. “You two ready?” She asked, looking at Lily and Willow.
Willow nodded. “How do we get out of here?”
“Same way we came in, if Remus can get us there.” Sirius looked hopefully at his boyfriend, who grinned wickedly.
“I always remember how to get in and out of places.”
Sirius refused to blush. “In that case, lead on my favourite furry friend.” He said instead getting to his feet and helping Lily to hers.
———
With a defiant yell, James leapt the narrow stretch of liquid, narrowly avoiding a claw which darted out to snatch at his ankles. He landed with a graceless thump and wrapped his arms around the nearly catatonic form,
“Sorry love.” He whispered “this is the only way I can think of getting you out of here.”
Another giant leap took James and Regulus most of the way back across the water. He stumbled, hugged Regulus even closer and ran for all he was worth, barely making it away from the clawing hands. With a pang of regret James ignored Zmjia’s pleas for help. There was nothing he could do for her. Breathless he reached Pandora just as an enormous part of the ceiling crashed into the pool in which he’d found Regulus.
“After you.” He panted. Pandora nodded and moving as quickly as she dared, lead the way out of the cavern, the sounds of smashing rocks echoing all around them.
“Are you okay to keep carrying him?” She asked when the paused at the entrance to the passage leading into the cavern.
“Yes.” James lied. He wasn’t. His lungs were burning, he had blisters all over his feet and legs from the boiling liquid he’d landed in, but he didn’t care. He wasn’t letting go. Not now. Not ever.
Pandora ran a practiced eye over the young man still curled in a ball in James’s strong arms. “I’ve seen him in worse states.” She said quietly, “But let’s not linger. He’s unlikely to wake for a while yet.”
“Can you get us out of here?”
Pandora grinned. “Of course I can. Are we going back to the hotel?”
“Yes. The others will be there.”
“Oh good. Can you jog with him? I might be able to put a levitation spell on him if that would help.”
“I can. And that would be great.”
The levitation made a huge difference. He still didn’t let go, but he could move more quickly. Refusing Pandora's offers of rest breaks, they made it back to the ground floor offices without incidence.
“How do we get out of here?” James asked as he leant back against a wall, out of the light. “I’m not exactly going to be able to walk through the grand hall carrying a catatonic Lord Black.”
Pandora stared thoughtfully at the wall opposite. “In that case you’ll be carrying our son. He fell asleep after a big day visiting his uncle Valentine.”
James laughed. It was as plausible as anything he could come up with. “Come on Harry, let’s get you home.” He said to the man in his arms who now looked like a two year old boy with a shock of brown hair and blue overalls.
Walking sedately beside Pandora, who now looked like most of the women he had seen in the city, they made their way to the door through which he had followed Regulus earlier that afternoon. He caught a glimpse of the three of them in an office window and almost tripped over in shock. Pandora had straightened his hair, and significantly lightened his skin. ‘Wow. I look like my dad,’ he thought. ‘That’s funny.’ And added a jaunty spring to his step, only to get a jab in the ribs from Pandora.
“Stop that or you’ll wake the baby.” She admonished.
“But you said.” James faltered at the uncharacteristic glare he received. “Oh right. Sorry,” he said and modified his walk.
Following in the wake of a young wizard, they passed unchallenged back into the grand hall. The were stopped a couple of times by wizards who thought they recognised James, however quickly realised they were mistaken when Pandora spoke to them in French. Despite the danger they were in, James loved the subterfuge. It was thrilling to play a role and have a completely different goal to what was expected. ‘Much like pulling a prank’ he thought absently as they walked down the wide steps to the street.
A moment later they aparated back to a laneway near the hotel. As with all public buildings, wards had been built into the brickwork to prevent people from magically appearing and disappearing inside the hotel, which meant that a very confused Sirius met James and Pandora as they walked through the front door carrying a small child.
“Who?” Sirius started.
“Upstairs. My room. Tell the others.” James said and continued towards the stairs which led up to the rooms.
Five minutes later Sirius burst through the bedroom door, followed by the rest of the group. James was sitting on his bed, with an arm wrapped around Regulus who was curled up tightly at his side.
“Where’s Regulus? Why have you brought back a child? Is he dead? Are you okay?” Sirius fired at James staring down at the bed.
Carefully, James scooted over a bit more, and patted the space beside him.
“It is Regulus. I cast an illusion spell so we could leave the building without being questioned, but his subconscious won’t let it go.” Pandora said gently over the top of Lily’s head, as they hugged each other fiercely.
“That was close. Too close,” Lily said into Pandora's shoulder before letting her go.
Sirius sank down onto the bed. “What happened?” He asked softly as everyone found somewhere to sit.
James quickly recounted how he had found Regulus and their narrow escape. Remus then filled in James and Pandora on their escape.
“We’ve left the parcel in our room. He’s still unconscious hooded and tied with your jumper.” Remus finished.
Pandora nodded curtly. “He’ll stay that way until Regulus is ready.” she said
“Why Regulus?” “How long will that take?” Lily and Sirius asked in tandem.
Pandora stayed silent. “You know who it is, don’t you?” Tara said curiously
Pandora nodded. “I do. So does Regulus. And it has cost him much, so he needs to finish this.” She gazed at the three men on the bed. “I don’t know how long he will take to recover. Hopefully by morning.”
Remus looked at the people around him., concern and exhaustion on their faces. “In that case, let’s all regroup in the morning.” He said, standing up and extending a hand to Sirius.
“I want to stay, to be here when he wakes up.” Sirius said, a mix of diffidence and wistfulness in his voice.
“You can’t Love. I'm not sure James has the energy for you both.” Remus answered.
“James could sleep in Reggie’s room.” Sirius suggested.
“No!” James said more fiercely than he’d intended. He took a breath and softened his tone at the hurt in Sirius’s eyes. “I can’t Pads. I need to make sure he’s alright too. You go with Remus and get some sleep. I’ll call if anything happens.”
Reluctantly Sirius allowed Remus to help him off the bed. “I’ll be back in the morning.” He promised
“I wouldn’t expect anything less,” James grinned.
Willow and Tara led the exodus. Pandora stayed for a moment and put some potions on the bedside table before kissing James on the cheek.
“Thank you. You might need these if he wakes up fighting. They should help you both sleep.”
James nodded. “Are they worse than his brothers?” He asked, barely audible through the pounding in his heart.
“Yes. Much much worse.”
“Good to know. I think I’ll sleep while I can then.” And with that James closed his eyes and the world went dark.
—
It was still dark when Lily woke to find Pandora pacing. The normally serene and cheerful woman was waving her hands erratically, pent up rage on her face. Whoever, or whatever, had angered Pandora was going to suffer dreadfully. Lily lay still. Watching. Suddenly Pandora stopped. Let out a huff. And collapsed to the floor. Instantly Lily was out of bed and beside her.
“What … what happened?” Pandora croaked.
“You were pacing. It looked like you were having a furious argument with someone. Or some thing. Then you collapsed. Are you okay?”
Pandora met the clear green gaze filled with so much concern. “I don’t know. Help me back onto the bed please. It’s cold down here.”
Back under the covers, Pandora lay with her face mere inches away from Lilys. “Are you happy?” She asked tentatively.
Lily turned the question over in her head before answering. “Yes. I am. I’m certainly happier than I’ve been in a long time. Why?”
Pandora didn’t answer. “Do you miss Sam?”
Lily smiled sadly then brightened. “I’ll always miss Sam. But you have shown me how to feel happy again. How to love again.”
Pandora leant over and kissed her. A long slow kiss full of unspoken emotions. “Thank you.” She said when they separated. “I will need to hold on to that.” They lay in silence. Hands held under the covers. Gazing at each other. Eyes filled with love. And slept that way until the sun broke through the clouds several hours later.
——
Sirius screamed. Again and again. He had never experienced a crucio curse this extreme before. The agony was unbearable. Why didn’t Mother stop? Why was Father laughing? Why didn’t Alphard help? Why was Regulus lying… lying…. Why? Why was he dead? He wasn’t supposed to die? Not yet. He was supposed to … supposed to … Sirius didn’t know what either of them were supposed to do. Not any more. Obedience? Loyalty? Fear? Rule? Power? He didn’t want that. He’d never wanted anything like that. He screamed again. Let him die. Don’t let him die. He screamed.
Remus was crying. Not sobbing. The tears were silent streams as he held Sirius, unable to break through the nightmares grip. The hours passed. The screams became hoarse croaks as Sirius writhed and thrashed, scratched and clawed at himself. At Remus. At the bed. Remus never let go. His physical bruises would heal. They always did. His heart? That was filled with fury at what had been done to two beautiful children who had no way to defend themselves. He wanted revenge.
‘Yesss.’ Growled the Wolf, salivating at the image of Orion and Walburga being ripped apart. ‘Destroy. Destroy them all.’
——
Willow was worried. She hadn’t realised how much hope she had placed in the Black Cathedral and its underground maze.
“Still awake huh? Did you get any sleep?” Tara murmured beside her.
Willow shook her head, even though she knew Tara couldn’t see it in the pre-dawn dark of the room.
Tara pulled her wife and best friend into a hug. “We’ll work it out. We always do.”
Willow smiled as Tara drifted back to sleep. Usually Tara did the worrying and Willow the reassuring, so if Tara wasn’t worried then they’d be okay. She hoped, falling asleep at last.
——
Regulus couldn’t move. Couldn’t breath. Couldn’t see. Couldn’t hear. There was nothing. No sensations. No life. Was he dead? Had he succeeded? And if he was dead, why did he have so many questions? His brain was riot of images he couldn’t control or understand. This was so different to his usual nightmare state. He was scared. Properly scared. For the first time in years he didn’t know what he needed to do. How to survive. There were no plans. Or plans within plans. He tried to breath. To suck air into his starving lungs. Nothing happened. He could feel himself start to panic. ‘This is good.’ He told himself. ‘Feeling is good.’ It helped. Then it stopped. Everything stopped. Everything. The world went blank. Regulus started to suffocate.
James jolted awake. Regulus had curled in on himself even tighter than before. Face buried in his chest behind his knees. Arms locked around his legs. He was convulsing uncontrollably.
“Reg. Sweetheart. Wake up. Please. You have to wake up.”
James was desperate. He tried to pry the arms and legs apart, but they were stuck. He needed a gap to get leverage. There were none. He thought about getting Remus or Pandora but didn’t want to leave Regulus alone. And Sirius was probably a complete mess as well so it was best if Remus stayed with him. James wanted to yell in frustration. But it wouldn’t help. Or even make him feel any better.
James growned. His mind racing but getting nowhere. Nightmares. What did he know about nightmares. And breaking people out of nightmares. Were you gentle? Or was a shock required. He couldn’t remember. His mother had always been gentle with him. He had always been gentle with Sirius. But Regulus wasn’t responding to gentle. So a shock then. But what would a shock do? Would it kill him? Or cause damage ? Or send him into shock! What could he do? He needed to do something.
“Think Potter. Think!” James berated himself “You’re not an idiot. There has to be a way.” He started running through a list of every spell he’d ever read, that he’d ever cast.
Suddenly the convulsions stopped. Regulus went still. Too still. James sat Regulus up and tried again to move the arms and legs. To relieve the pressure on his neck. Nothing. Nothing. Carefully James lowered Regulus back on to his side and lay down, wrapping himself around the slightly smaller man.
“I’ve dreamt about holding you like this. Of having you curled up against me. Of falling asleep with you in my arms. Ever since you kissed me. Before we even slept together. All I’ve wanted is to hold you close. To tell you how loved you are. By me. By Sirius. Especially by me.” James whispered, tears rolling down his checks. “Your touch in the wood. Your touch in Kensington. The feather soft touch of my woodland sprite. And your strength. Physical. Intellectual. Magical. I felt it in your body when you held and fucked me. I’ve seen it in your eyes whenever you’re faced with a challenge. I’ve felt it in spells you cast. In the way you fought to save my life that night. In the way you defy death again and again.” James choked on a sob. “Please Reg. Don’t die on me. I want to show you a world filled with sunshine. With love. With affection. I want to shower you with passion and adoration. Most of all I want to know what you want. What you really truly want. And if it’s not me, then.. then I respect that. Just don’t die. Please. Please Reg. I love you.” James stopped. He couldn’t go on.
———
James opened his eyes to see Pandora sitting at the foot of the bed watching Regulus with a slight from between her brows.
“How long?”
“Only a few minutes. He seems to have a relaxed a little. No nightmares?”
“Convulsions. Then nothing. I can’t uncurl him. It feels like he’s breathing but so shallow, it can’t be enough to keep him alive.” James felt what was left of his voice crack.
Pandora raised her eyes to his. “Whatever you’ve been doing is working. He’ll come back today.” She said gently.
“I’m telling him stories. Ones my mum used to tell me whenever I was scared or had hurt myself” James said. Then he realised “Aren’t we supposed to leave today?”
“Not yet. Two more nights should be enough.”
James was so confused. He went ask more questions. He felt it. And again. A slight movement in his arms. Hope flared in his eyes and heart.
Pandora leant across and kissed Regulus on the head then James on the shoulder. “Keep holding him. Keep telling him stories if you like. He’s on his way back.”