Their sin is hate, ours is love
“Let me in!” Dorcas yelled, her fist banging on the heavy wooden door to Marlene’s room. What the actual fuck had just happened? Dorcas groaned and smacked harder on the door, eventually using her brain and grabbing a Bobby-pin from her pocket to try and force open the door. Regulus was an odd boy, but one thing he was good at was unlocking doors. He’d never actively taught Dorcas how to - but she’d watched and picked up on it.
”What the fuck Meadowes?” Mary yelled, flinging open the door and throwing Dorcas into the wall with an aggressive flick of her wand. “You’ve fucked up Marlene, and now you’re breaking in? Didn’t finish off the job to your satisfaction?” Dorcas growled and managed to break out of Mary’s binding curse.
Dorcas was mildly impressed, she wasn’t aware that McDonald had the balls to fight a Slytherin - but then again there were those rumours floating around about why Mulciber was confined to the infirmary.
”Mary, I assure you, there are things you are unaware of. Let me talk to McKinnon, and I’ll be on my way.” Dorcas said calmly, her wand sliding back into her sleeve. Mary narrowed her eyes and turned away.
She soon came back with Lily. Lily stared down Dorcas and, for the first time all week, Dorcas felt fazed. Lily was renowned for her less than orthodox ways to protect her friends. Lucius had started a rumour she used blood magic after he left an encounter with her following tripping up Lupin with a black eye. Dorcas was pretty sure that Lucius had just said that to save his reputation. But once Narcissa fed that to Bellatrix and Bellatrix fed it to Rita - the rumour wagon was unstoppable. Eventually Lily sighed and walked away, allowing Dorcas to pass.
<•>
Marlene was sitting the bathtub, towel still wrapped around her, rosary clutched in her fist as she stared thoughtlessly at the wall. Dorcas was confused, should she do something? Should she talk? Fuck, why couldn’t she better at this shit. God, Marlene was never going to want her. Stop. Grow a fucking pair. Jeez. Okay. Marlene turned to face Dorcas slowly, her eyes still unfocused, blood slowly welling up from the sides of the metal cross on her rosary. Dorcas frowned and gently pried it from Marlene’s grip, noting down the rust-red stain that coated the Jesus figure - how many times had this happened before?
That didn’t matter right now. What mattered was Marlene.
Whatever Marlene was struggling with is woven into her soul, having planted roots so deep it would take careful and skilled gardening to unroot them. Thankfully Dorcas has a green thumb
Dorcas gently sat opposite Marlene, leaning against the wall and staring intrigued at Marlene who was slowly blinking back into reality. “Dorcas.” Her raspy, tired voice sparked with recognition. “God, what have you done to me.” A bitter laugh escaped Marlene’s oh-so perfect mouth. Dorcas hated that it was her that was the cause of Marlene’s pain. That it was her who’d triggered this response. She hated herself for not realising sooner. For wasting precious hidden moments. For allowing it to snowball into this excruciating moment.
”What’s wrong with us?” Marlene asked suddenly, her eyes locked on the rosary Dorcas had taken from her. Dorcas paused. Religion was never something she had worried or thought about. Her parents didn’t care about that. About her particularly either. It was grades, it was making up for her death. Never religion. Liking girls seemed exceptionally small, insignificant, in the grand scheme of the constant, crumbling pressure in her head. How the fuck was she meant to respond.
”I don’t think there’s anything wrong with us. Before everything, before all the complications, love was the law and religion was taught. Religion is something that’s been pounded into our hearts, displacing our capacity for love. And, your mum can say she’s worried - or whatever bullshit - but you’re covered in His favour because God is love and He would be proud of you for being able to accept yours. And I know that you’ve been worried, and if it makes you feel any better - I know that you’re dripping in His favour.” Dorcas paused, hoping that at least some of what she said made sense.
Marlene was staring, opened mouth, glossy eyed at Dorcas. Dorcas had in no means a ‘way with words’ but it seemed that she’d said exactly what Marlene had needed to hear. Marlene scrambled from the opposite side of the bath to throw herself into Dorcas’ arms. She clung onto Dorcas’ clothes, soaking up all the comfort that Dorcas gave, fiery hot tears slowly leaking down her cheeks like streams of acid. Dorcas clung on back, fingernails digging into the fluffy fabric of her towel, breathing in Marlene’s smell.
•|•
Whilst clinging onto Dorcas, Marlene had a feeling that their story wasn’t done, not in any shape or form, but at least she had found a rock to cling onto. A way to navigate through the constant chaos. Maybe she wasn’t doomed. Just maybe, she would be able to kiss Dorcas on the mouth and love her loudly.